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can someone explain why i always have this rsd response to a show closing? i sang well, everyone sang well, everyone was nice, what’s with the feeling that i just got turned down
#caitlyn sings :)#opera singer#operablr#theater#it makes sense in general i just really don’t appreciate it#and would love tips#on how to not let it Wreck me
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reverse gatekeeping. I am on my knees begging people to engage with the source material
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right so. got rejected from my first professional audition today. i’m considering how i want to make a whimsical rejection tracker in my practice journal. so i don’t throw up :)
#caitlyn sings :)#opera singer#not limited to opera#i suppose#theater kid#?#the vision is a cartoon map with a little picture or description for each one#that’d take So much space though#so i might just make a chart and get fun little stickers#bullet journaling#also i’m addicted to (in love with) my practice journal
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this shit is pretty funny tho. like entirely unprovoked

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Flop Tenor:
Roberto Alagna as Don Carlo in the 2010 Metropolitan Opera production, here rehearsing fight choreography during the intermission and understanding the assignment very literally.
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sad girl sitting alone on a bench: at least we have giuseppe verdi
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i always did think it interesting that verdi decided to make gilda in rigoletto younger than her victor hugo inspiration’s counterpart- blanche is mentioned to be 16, while gilda (according to verdi’s letters) is 14. like i do think her being younger makes sense, it just felt odd that he went out of his way to tweak that specific number because it felt like such a little detail.
anyway i ran some numbers this morning and did you know :) that if verdi’s daughter had survived infancy she would have been 14 by the time rigoletto premiered :) woaw :) :) :)
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callas drawing from... sometime last month.
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11pm time to listen to island magic again !!
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“what did you do instead of practice” oh i jerked off a lot. next question
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anyway here’s a picture of my cat

her name is venus >:)
how to remove Guy That Was Mean To Me from head
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how to remove Guy That Was Mean To Me from head
#caitlyn sings :)#he insulted my musicianship#in front of my peers and the director#operablr#in a way that was unwarranted and Just designed to hurt me#nobody even thought he was right so WHY is it in my head#anyway he’s an angry cheater who got cast as horace tabor in#the ballad of baby doe#wonder if he sees the irony#anyway.#fuck that guy in particular#but! i haven’t called him a cunt to his face#very brave for that
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It's actually really ableist that I have several expensive interests and no money. I should be given 5k a month just autism related spending money
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hey sexy what time do you plan on being done grieving
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*googling* how to make opera director hate women less
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i do think it’s a really fun feature that operas have birthdays. i know that everything can have a birthday if you know how to look at things but i love that every march 6 i see people saying happy birthday la traviata!! and every october 29 i see jokes about how of course don giovanni the opera is a scorpio (although i think don giovanni the character should have been born in may). there’s something so kind about it
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