enotikspeedy-blog

[enotikspeedy-blog]

You said that there are people who smell of dawn. People whose lips spread out in a smile and give everyone around them a light. These people look with cleanliness and innocence, they smile when they see a plant that has sprouted through a thick layer of asphalt, they smile at the animals. These people are so bright because they are light.

You also said that there are people resembling a scarlet sunset, whose faces are covered with freckles, and their eyes are burning with a bright fire of hope and great strength, their movements are rhythmic and fast, and you definitely can not catch up with them, because they run faster than any athlete. These people are the outgoing sun, they are life.

But there are people who are different, they are different. They are a raging flame or a never-ending storm. These people are warriors, ready to do anything, absolutely everything, and sacrifice everything for the sake of others. They incinerate themselves for the sake of the cause they believe in, for the sake of victory ... for the sake of a peaceful sky above their heads. But the fact is that most of the time these people are calm outside, but what is going on in their hearts is horrified until they tremble in their limbs. It destroys them, stretches from the heart along the chest and destroys everything in its path. These people are dead.

And you said that I am a never-ending storm. But why the storm? Why not light or life. Why Death?

And you just laughed when I approached you with these questions and said that this can not be explained, you can only feel it.

And I felt it.

I know, Thor Odyson, that you loved me. Liked so that when embracing bones on the ribs were compressed and there was nothing to breathe, so that the asterisks flew before their eyes after a long separation, just as no one else could have loved. He loved until trembling in his hands, to numb fingers, to goosebumps, to difficulties in breathing.

You loved me so much, Thor, that you did not notice how you killed. How do you kill by promising to return, but disappear for a few months, by not noticing me in a crowd of people when you talk to Loki and even by kissing me goodbye, saying that you'll just return Odin home, but disappear again ... For me, forever, dear Thor.

And, what a pity that you will not see how Hela pierces my body with a blade, how the blood spreads over my hands and flows to Asgard land, how I miss and think about you for the last time, is already really the last.

What a pity that I will not see how you run up to the lifeless body, just the body - the remnant of cells, molecules, particles, which perish with every second. That the body is only bones and flesh, it is not me. I will not see your tears, Odyson, and I will not hear the words of apology, I will not feel the grief of loss and will not share with you sadness. I will not be your queen, I will not give you an heir, and the new Asgard will not be our home. I am no longer the source of your strength, not your support and support. I am a lifeless body, a set of cells.

But, still, Thor, why the storm?

[enotikspeedy-blog]

Oh myyy….

https://www.instagram.com/bembiann_art

[enotikspeedy-blog]

Bill Skarsgård’s characters in some of his latest works (2013-2017)

[enotikspeedy-blog]

Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

💛 Chris Hemsworth in the Behind The Scenes

[enotikspeedy-blog]

Sometimes it seems to me that I'm fine. I'm so grateful for the remission for this. But this is temporary, right? Absolutely.

I do not know when I will feel comfortable in my body, with my thoughts and emotions. I just think that I'm not sick, I do not feel it. I do not feel the actions that I do rashly and do not feel that I'm hurting people, only a piece of paper reminds me of this. A paper that brings me to reality again and again. I want to scream to believe. Make yourself believe in the bright end.