euphoria-dysmorphia-2

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

i’m screaming?

me in october: i’m back guys :)

it’s almost february and i am sorry? i have a lot of followers who i am not completely sure why they follow me bc my blog is a dry and barren land

i kinda migrated to edtwt 😳 i am making a promise and there is a 50% chance i will keep it, i will try and make posts again, but life kinda do be crazy doe

if i still have any moots, how are u guys?

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

um.. hello lmao

just wanted to say that i’m here and alive and back on my bullshit :)

i keep saying i will post regularly but then i fall off the face of the earth, i’m actually for real gonna try and post things again lmao

how r u guys doing?

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

nobody:

my ed: you’re fat because the abbreviation for pound is “lb” and that is derived from “libra” which is your zodiac sign so essentially libra = pounds. i don’t make the rules

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

i didn’t want to, but i calculated my calories and it was around 800. i burned like 150 on a walk then 150 more from a workout. i wanted to do more but i was exhausted and i had to do something with family. my mom said i was “so motivating” because i went on a walk and exercised and had salad for lunch. it made me feel good tbh but she didn’t see that i had binged. i feel bad because i know she tries to lose weight and i’m losing more but in a bad way. i’m glad i stopped bingeing there, i definitely didn’t burn all of it off but i did my best and tonight i’ll have like 170 cals of dinner. i’ll be around 1000 and it’s bad but not as bad as it could be. i don’t know about dessert because i made apple cobbler and i think we’re making ice cream too and i don’t wanna have to eat it, i’ll just say i had a lot of snacks today (which isn’t a lie) and say i’ll have some in the morning. that should be fine i hope. i probably won’t gain that much, maybe just delay losing? i’m already at my gw for next tuesday so i have time to get under it, it’ll be okay. i think that’s helping me, i know that i have a deadline each week for my weight, and even if i mess up i still have time. well stay safe sorry for ranting again lol

i binged today. i was baking and was like “oh whenever i bake, i binge on it but i wont because i’m super motivated!!” apparently not. i age the apples then just kept eating and i feel horrible i’m not gonna reach my goal weight by my birthday oh my god i just need to get through today then i can get back on track. i’m so horrified i hate this. at least i skilled breakfast. i think it happened also because i had to eat lunch with my family, so if i eat in the day there’s a higher change i will binge. i’m so upset. it’ll be fine i just have to tell myself it’s gonna reset my metabolism and i’ll start over tomorrow. i really hope i don’t gain oh my god

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

i binged today. i was baking and was like “oh whenever i bake, i binge on it but i wont because i’m super motivated!!” apparently not. i age the apples then just kept eating and i feel horrible i’m not gonna reach my goal weight by my birthday oh my god i just need to get through today then i can get back on track. i’m so horrified i hate this. at least i skilled breakfast. i think it happened also because i had to eat lunch with my family, so if i eat in the day there’s a higher change i will binge. i’m so upset. it’ll be fine i just have to tell myself it’s gonna reset my metabolism and i’ll start over tomorrow. i really hope i don’t gain oh my god

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

i’m gonna try the chloe ting ab thing? it’s pretty popular and hopefully it’ll work lol. the thing i’m worried about, is that i might gain muscle which will affect the scale so my gw might be further away? i saw some youtube results and they were crazy, one girl went from like a major belly pouch to a literal flat stomach it was crazy, but she only lost 5 pounds. like i wanna have muscle but not so much? idk wish me luck lmao

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

oh my god-

“quick!! if i drown my insides in water they’ll forget i ate anything!”

Me: *eats any amount of food*

My ed: QUICK! DRINK 5L OF WATER TO CONFUSE YOUR BODY

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

that actually jumpscared me im-

Unmute !

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

Inner thigh workout. Share and like bitches.

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

this is only for me

Skinny by Christmas Gang 🎄❄️☃️

Reblog if you’re going to be at a goal weight (whether it’s your ugw or you’re next gw!!) by Christmas!!! Let’s get this bitches!! I want my family to not recognize me since seeing me last year, I want “oh my word you got so skinny!!” I want to look so thin in my Christmas morning pajamas, and to look at the pictures taken and see what I want to see sitting there instead of some fat double chinned monster. WHO’S WITH ME???

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

so good and bad news? i got my period today which scared me so bad because i forgot that that was a thing, like i felt bad because if i still have it i feel like i’m not restricting enough? like over the summer i lost it but now it’s here again? idk. but also i might gain more weight since i might be bloated, i’m drinking a lot of water and exercising so it shouldn’t be horrible. either i haven’t gained the weight yet, or maybe i’m actually less and already have period weight just didn’t know because this was the first time i weighed myself in a while? who knows lmao

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

yeah that’s a shit ton of calories but i kinda wanna eat it

NEVERMIND LOOK HOW MUCH SUGAR IT HAS HOLY SHIT??

The oreo shake can't hurt you, it's not real.

The oreo shake:

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

Things to count instead of calories:

-dogs you see

-times you smile

-leaves on a flower

-friends who want you to be happy

-tasty things you enjoy eating during the day

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

[euphoria-dysmorphia-2]

my plan for the rest of the year

i could do -4 a week but i’m counting in case i binge or have to eat 2 meals on the weekends

if my net is -200 each day:

sep 30: 138

oct 7: 134.6

oct 14: 131

oct 21: 127.5

oct 28: 124

nov 4: 121

nov 11: 117.6

nov 18: 114

nov 25: 110.8

dec 2: 107

dec 9: 104

dec 16: 100.6

dec 23: 97.2

dec 30: 93.8

so i would basically be at my ugw at the end of the year. i’m testing out because my mom said i could exercise in the morning as well as go to sports, so i would burn even more.

exercise plan for mornings:

jump rope fast for 15 minutes: 183kcal

6mph run for 15 minutes: 143kcal

150 push ups: 57kcal

100 arm circles, 50 ytw with weights: this isn’t for cals just to reduce arm fat

hydrant leg lifts, extensions, knee rotations, knee flappers, lying leg lifts: these r just for hip dips, but i bet all of these exercises burn maybe 30kcal?

so in total this would burn around 400 calories a day. i get to start playing field hockey games as goalie next week, goalie doesn’t burn as many but i guess like 100? so it’s roughly 500 burnt each day, but i’ll say 600 just because of waking, and extra field hockey and doing sprints at practice. weekends. so in the morning i will jog then exercise later and try to get as much as possible i guess?

dude i’ve been thinking for like half an hour about this and i keep realizing that i sound so.. obsessed. like i’ve been doing math in my head for about an hour and i didn’t even realize it. i’m sorry if i sound insane i just can’t stop?? ugh well i’m gonna drink a bunch of water and fun things sorry for spamming