fairduchess-blog

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tonivanov‌.

Anton can only shrug. He wasn’t saying these things because he wanted to get on her good side, or that he was trying to just ease her, but he meant it all. Each time he says something to her he means it. Anton has really ended up caring for the duchess more than anyone else lately, even after he had been finished with his duty of protecting her directly. After everything she had been through he figured that she deserved so much better.

And here she goes, offering him food and everything considering she was one of the most powerful women in the country, he knows he could request the most outlandish dish and she’d still have it made for him, but he never abused it, nor does he want her to do anything like that for him. He had always tried to clear out that he wasn’t getting close to her because of her power, contrary to what some people had actually said about his relationship with Tati.

“You know you don’t have to go with what I want, or anything really. You spoil me too much when you can.” But if she says life had been better with him around, and seeing her body language, this woman he almost knows as well as the back of his hand, he knows it was because she had been more than thankful for what he had done for her in the past. Something which had never considered a burden.

“I actually miss being stuck with you.” He admits straight out, different from the way she had answered his question, so he stops for a second to face her, pinching her cheek lightly. “Training’s taken most of my time, but after this set of guards make it I’d much rather return and focus on you again.”

trying not to pout too much about the ever evasive friendships of anton’s men, tatianna tried her best to be not bothered by it. the redhead, who had a habit of befriending people in low places because she found them easier ( read: kinder ) to talk to, didn’t want to be too put out by the fact that she might not be able to befriend them all. sighing a little to shake the bad feelings away, she moved on. she’d try again next time.

giving him whatever he asked for, whatever he could possibly want or think of, was all tatianna could do. she did not think she was enough to thank him, and so the grand duchess would use her influence to give him whatever he wanted. to her, it was only fair -- he had given her the world by just befriending her, and having him in her life had likely saved it on more than one occasion. had he not been there, she imagined that, during the war, she might have run away. or, perhaps worse.

but such thoughts didn’t matter now when she had anton to dote on. “i absolutely don’t have to, but it is my choice to do so, and your want is my want.” she explained simply, tightening her arm around his. having him close both calmed and excited her, both made her serene and flustered. she didn’t understand how such a person could have an affect on her, but the feeling was so wonderful that she beamed at him anyway. “i swear it. i do not promise these things because i feel forced. i do it because you deserve such kindness.”

tatianna had to wonder if inviting him back as a personal guard was an abuse of her power. despite the power and grace that she had as a grand duchess, she didn’t like to insist on anything of it came off as too strong. “i... i miss you terribly,” she said instead. “the sun does not rise on days i do not see you.”

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tiltedcrwncs‌.

he couldn’t help but laugh along with her and the gentle movements and soft laughs. she was very nice and he was enjoying their conversation already, and he could only see them having more conversations as time went on. it would be nice to have a good friend here. 

his own hair shone in the light as he followed her movements. maybe she was afraid of something? maybe she thought there would be something that was coming that she was not prepared for? he did not have any plans, but maybe she did. he supposed he would find out. 

he supposed she did not trust him. it was not an unlikely thought. many of the men at the court were known to have grabbed women, or tried to seduce them. he had never really attempted to, more than a few fumbling kisses around. “i think that you can never truly place the start of nicknames. maybe it was like a baby name, something small and funny,” he said with a nod “it is lovely to meet you as well. i suppose you will have to try, but i do not know how much luck you will have. i feel as if many have tried to give me a nickname, and yet none have succeeded.” 

having a friend amongst a crowd of strangers was all the grand duchess really wanted. this was something she made no secret of -- the russian imagined there was tale of her desperate search for friendship being spread amongst the royals. it didn’t matter to her so much; there was only so much she could be embarrassed by.

realising her rudeness, the young girl turned back, eyebrows high on her head, and she held her hands out. “i am sorry, i forgot myself for a moment.” the war had done quite a number on her -- most of her grief, in fact, was caused single-handedly by one man. “it happens from time to time to all of us, i suspect.”

smiling slowly, her face lighting up, tatianna giggled. “i have heard that it is something i used to say when i was still learning to pronounce my own name, but i do not know quite how true that is.” she told him, before folding her hands behind her back. eyes narrowing, a playful expression on her face, the sweet little thing looked determined and jovial. she was determined to find him a nickname. it was, after all, something she understood as a key indicator of friendship. “we shall find you something. i insist upon it. martin, i-- how would we shorten that? marty? mari? i am undecided, but not unhopeful.”

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tonivanov.

“It’s not difficult to do so.” He reassures her, because at this point it was the least he could do. He didn’t have to tell her for her to know it was hard for normal people like him to learn how to act around royalty like her. If she hadn’t been near his age, or if he hadn’t been assigned to protecting her, he probably would have thought the same, but alas he wasn’t like those others. He knew the little things about her that had made him appreciate her more than anyone.

With everything that had happened to her in the past and every bit of information about it all that he knows, there was no real reason why he couldn’t be protective. More than being her guard, or anyone else’s for that matter, he was her friend. It was wrong to admit it, but he had always thought about her deeper than that, but he had no right. He was after all, a simple lowly guard, disposable. At least in his little ways like this, he could care for her.

“Then I won’t. Some chicken okay with you?” He doesn’t even flinch or pull away when she takes his arm, actually having difficulty biting back a grin when she does. Being this close to her wasn’t unusual, in fact, if she hadn’t been the duchess some would mistake them as a couple even in the times they spent together before.

He only shifts his arm so that she can hold onto it more comfortably as he leads her away, ignoring what could be looks of curiosity or disdain from others. A lot of the people in the troops knew how important Tatitanna was to Anton, beyond being an imperial guard, they knew how much he cherished her. Seems like everyone but her knew, which was good, it was safe. “How’s life been for you since I left your side? Not too chaotic I hope?”

“oh! you are far too sweet, dear man.” the redhead giggled, something inside her melting a little at the compliment. it was something she would never quite get used to, even from him. as much as she liked his attention -- and she certainly did -- it always caught her off guard. tatianna always wondered if she deserved such sweet words, especially from somebody as lovely as him. even if she didn’t, it was nice to hear it anyway. cheeks flushing, the girl smiled up at anton softly.

the way he felt the need to protect her was incredibly important to her. this was on two counts: the first was that it was nice for her to feel safe, and he always seemed to be prepared to look after her -- it was a more than little charming; the second was that she had a habit of being particularly jumpy after everything that had happened, having somebody she could trust was all she wanted. securing her arm in his more comfortably, the grand duchess made sure to hold on just a little tighter.

it didn’t matter to her what it was they ate, just that they were together. “if you wish it, we shall have it.” tatianna told him, shrugging a little, her smile growing. whatever he wanted, she would get it for him. she felt it was the least she could do, considering how much he had done for her. “chicken, it is. is there anything else you might want?”

leaning a little towards him ( perhaps in the way a lover might ), tatianna wondered how to answer the question. truthfully, life had been awful without him twofold. she’d been panicked, and when she wasn’t anxious, she was bored without his company. wetting her lips and avoiding his eyes in a telltale give away that she was lying, the grand duchess shrugged again. “oh, i... life is better with you in it, you know that.” it wasn’t quite a lie, but it wasn’t the truth. “i wonder if life has been better for you now that you aren’t stuck with me all the time.”

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tonivanov‌.

Watching her try to ease his fellow soldiers into being comfortable with her actually makes him smile too. He knows what kind of a person Tatianna was, and no matter how many times he tells others that she was this kind of woman, nobody would believe it. Some would say it was what she was meant to be, what she needed to be to serve the country. Some didn’t believe it, thinking Anton delusional for trusting a royal. He’d brush them off all the time, thinking nobody knew her the way he did.

At the mention of not having had eaten yet, he looks up at the sun then back at her, “It’s late, you should have at least eaten something.” The usual worry takes over, but it’s always that way. Ever since they had started talking further than being guard and duchess he had fussed over her. Normal, actually, because Tatianna was someone he had grown to care about deeply.

“But what would Russia say if I decline the offer? Of course I’ll join you.” And once he was sure he could, he reaches over and ruffles her hair lightly. “You shouldn’t have showed up here, you’re sneaking off again.”

Another point of worry. Ever since he’s had to take over the duties that came with being a high ranking officer, like training the new recruits, it also meant he had no time to spend with her like he usually did. He knows how much she likes walking around, learning about people, learning about the country beyond the walls of the palace, and without him she would be open to danger wouldn’t she? “Now let’s go. What would you like to have?”

tatianna had a habit of making friends with her staff. she had made friends with her handmaidens and all of the cooks in the kitchen and the guards who served her, but those who did not know the grand duchess were typically unsure of her just for the mere fact that she was a central member of the russian royal family. she couldn’t blame them, really, because she knew it must have been intimidating. still, she said a little wistfully, “i wish they liked me.”

her thoughtful look turned brighter at his concern. it was almost a little romantic, the way that he worried about her, but she couldn’t help the fluttering in her chest or the smile across her face. it was nice to have somebody to care about you that way -- and sure, maybe she shouldn’t have waited. maybe she should have eaten before now, given the time that it was, but having meals without him now felt wrong. doing anything without him by her side felt odd, and small, quiet, domestic moments only amplified his absence. it was a softness she had long craved for, and even if she wasn’t sure of his intent, she knew she could trust him.

a laugh bursted from her as his hand ruffled her hair -- such a gesture might have bothered her if it were not him doing so. she wasn’t one for intricate hairstyles, but she would be lying if she said she didn’t like to look nice for him. “you mustn’t disappoint russia.” tatianna teased lightly.

anton was right -- tatianna did have a habit of wandering off. since childhood, she had an urge to run off and explore a life that was nothing like her own. if she had her way, tatianna might want to live in a small cottage somewhere secluded. of course, this wasn’t a life destined for her, and instead she was stuck. a golden cage was still a cage, after all. taking his arm the way a lover might, the redhead shrugged. “oh, it matters very little to me what it is we eat. just that we eat it together. you should pick, considering your rigorous training.”

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alixofbohemia.

Alix beamed in delight at her new friend. It was such a pleasure to find someone who was, at least in reading material, so similar to her. “I enjoy Homer myself, particularly his Odyssey. The appearance of Circe is exceptional, and I find it a little empowering. Imagine if we could turn men to pigs. Everything would have been much easier for us women.” She added with a delicate wink - yes, that would be entertaining. But, she would not turn her husband into a pig; no, he was rather spectacular , and she was too fond of him to even contemplate that. At her question, Alix pursed her lips in thought. “I do believe that in some things we are better than men, just like in some things they are, generally, better than us. Some women enjoy warfare, most do not, and I think there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. I do not like it, either, and I fail to see the need of it. But, men seem to always desire more power, and more things to call their own. They are awfully possessive, are they not?”

“oh, isn’t the odyssey a marvel?” tatianna gasped, a bright grin lighting her face. she had a deep, deep love of the classics, and homer was something of a hero to her. she wished that she had some skill in writing as she had in reading it, because telling stories was something she might have been interested in. there weren’t many others she had known who had read homer’s epics like she had -- or at least they had, and they hadn’t been particularly interested in discussing it with her. giggling at the other’s interpretation of circe, the grand duchess nodded. “i wouldn’t mind turning a few odd men into barnyard animals. such a thing would be... convenient, at the very least.” the redhead said. it was surprising how concisely alix could explain her very feelings where herself was not the best at expressing them. the possessive men she’d known had damn near ruined her life. “frighteningly so. it has been quite a-- a hindrance for me, really.”

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tonivanov‌.

The bright sunlight was hitting the pavement as training had ended, and he hadn’t noticed when his soldiers tensed up, stopping the jokes and merriment of the end, only realizing why when he looks back and the smile on his face couldn’t be hidden.

Who would really imagine the grand duchess interacting with a high ranking imperial guard? It was no longer his responsibility to guard their doors at night, follow them around the country when needed, but he still chose to, because he had gotten unbelievably close with Yanna. In front of everyone like this, he keeps his distance, but he knows that people knew just how comfortable Anton was around her.

“My lady, it’s quite early for you to be here.” But he grins, a glint in his eyes, “At ease soldiers, go pack up, we’re done for today.” He tells them, dismissing everyone which has them scrambling to collect their things and leave. There were relieved faces and he can’t help but chuckle. If they had to be tense around anyone from the family it definitely wasn’t Tatianna, not when she was the sweetest girl Anton knew.

When it was less crowded, he finally takes a few steps closer to her, his grin dropping into a comfortable smile. “Have you eaten?”

tatianna knew the guards weren’t necessarily the most comfortable around her, which she could understand. for those that didn’t know her, it would be reasonable to assume that the grand duchess would be intimidating. she was, after all, the so-called heart of russia. such a name did carry a weight with it, even if she was quite gentle by nature.

waving to the sheepish guards as they walked by her, the redhead smiled. even if they were a little unsettled by her presence, it didn’t mean she wouldn’t try. that was the other thing she was known for -- excessive politeness. she wanted to be friends with everyone she could possibly meet. perhaps it was a little childish, but for somebody who had seen such harshness within people during the war, she was desperate for some kindness.

which was another reason, really, why anton had caught her attention so immediately. he had been so kind and so thoughtful towards her both during the war, that she hadn’t liked to be somewhere without him. now that the war was over, she was heartbroken at the idea of leaving the norm behind. considering how much calmer she was with him by her side, a familiar panic rose in her when he was gone.

but that didn’t matter so much now. grinning at him, hands clasped at her waist, tatianna shrugged. “i might have waited until you were not busy. i... i like to wait for you. i thought it might have been nice for us to share a quiet meal. does that sound... acceptable?” she asked, hoping that it would be.

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alixofbohemia‌.

“I quite like philosophy. Ancient philosophy, the scholastic, and the modern day philosophy as well. I find Master Machiavelli to be quite interesting. Some things he said are correct, while the other are a bit too harsh.” She replied as they walked, a friendly smile still on Alix’s face. “Of course, I am also rather fond of History, and I enjoy reading poetry. My guilty pleasure is probably Ovid.” She lightly chuckled, and hearing the latter, nodded. “Indeed. The nature of Men is inexplicable. Some are kind, but most are not. Sometimes I cannot understand it.”

“oh, i love ovid.” tatianna had a soft spot for classic stories, if she was entirely honest. there was such an escapism in them, and the grand duchess couldn’t resist the temptation of escape, even if it was only for a few hours. “philosophy sounds wonderful. i haven’t read much, but i imagine there is some philosophy laced within all forms of literature. i love homer, myself. his epics are truly marvellous.” she told her new friend, before considering her statement. “do you perhaps believe that the nature of women are better? in my experience, far too many have been active participants in war. i have little time for violence, and do not see the sense in it.”

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nielsofdanes‌.

“I am beginning to dread returning home to normality,” he chuckled, in reference to his lightened load. Of course, he still had some duties in France, but making allies and engaging in acts of diplomacy was far more exciting for such a social creature as Niels than economic policy or disputes over trading routes. “I have been here for a fair while now, though unfortunately nothing seems to have progressed all that while. I suppose that just means we have more time to spend with each other, doesn’t it?” 

“oh, of course! i imagine this is -- somewhat -- a holiday for you. perhaps, even if it was only a little bit of one.” the redhead realised, eyebrows climbing tatianna’s forehead as her expression shifted. it was nice to hear that niels was enjoying his time, though, because many people she had met were not, herself included. as adaptive as she could be, and she certainly could be, this trip had been exceptionally difficult for the introvert. “i suppose it does!” she grinned, pleased to spend time with him. “you shall have to show me your favourite spots. so far, i have only found the library and the gardens.”

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having anton in her life had been, arguably, the best thing for tatianna. [ @tonivanov ]

he had been there for her at a time when nobody else had -- they had been distant for varied and valid reasons, but his presence and constancy had been exceptionally valued all the same. as they’d gotten older and moved away from the war, something in her had softened towards him. though she had been preoccupied with the count during the war, it had been anton who was lingering in her thoughts. she simply hadn’t been able to help herself. she wasn’t sure what it was, but the grand duchess just felt... safe around him. nothing fostered that feeling in her anymore, and so she wanted to cling to that as much as she could.

watching as he finished up his training, the girl waited patiently, endlessly impressed by his skill. as somebody who had always enjoyed the written word, she seemed to lack talent in more physical or sporting areas, and so his abilities always impressed her. 

“good morning,” the grand duchess chirped, smiling softly. it would have been odd to see them conversing, except for how obvious their friendship must have been to others, despite their different social standings. smoothing her skirts a little, tatianna’s smile grew into a grin. “you looked wonderful out there, truly. very impressive!”

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alixofbohemia‌.

If it were appropriate, Alix would have hugged the duchess. But, such displays of affection were not suited for someone who was barely an acquaintance, but the Queen had all the faith that the two would soon become good friends. “Books are a welcome escape from duties, and the pressures of ruling. And when it comes to common people… Well, they are in a greater number. They could have been us, and after a coup we could be them. And kindness costs us nothing, does it not?” Her smile widened. “I am glad to have found a like minded person.”

“what do you like to read?” tatianna asked, red hair curling down her back as she tilted her head in curiosity. she couldn’t help but ask, really, and perhaps the conversation topic was too flowery and light, but the russian found both great comfort and meaning between the pages of books. considering the queen’s opinions were lining up with her own, she had to know if they had similar tastes in literature, or if there was something knew to discover. “kindness is a necessity. i don’t understand how some people can be mean.”

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alixofbohemia‌.

“Most wonderful.” Alix replied with a smile on her lips - yes, libraries were a delight. She always felt at home among books, reading and losing herself to a world that was not her own, no matter how briefly. She listened as the duchess spoke, nodding her head along; she was correct, after all. People in high positions mattered, yes, but they were not the ones truly worthy. They were nothing without their subjects and courtiers. “I agree. It is the normal people that count. Not just us.”

tatianna was delighted at the statement -- the redheaded royal was not used to finding common ground amongst others, and so to find another who was so enthralled by books allowed the grand duchess to think she might actually make a friend. a real one. and to discover that she also agreed about the importance of the people rather than royal families, the young thing could have melted. “i am not sure i have ever met anybody who has agreed with me on both counts. especially the second.” she mused. “it is refreshing.”

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alixofbohemia.

Alix nodded, agreeing with the fiery-haired duchess. “That, or I end up isolating myself in a library. Back home it is easier - my staff and courtiers are quite used to my personality, and sometimes the need of just thinking to myself, so I am far more relaxed there, than I am here.” She added. “Yes, peace does sound exquisite. The world deserved a respite. I hope it will last for centuries, though I am aware that nothing is certain when it comes to mankind.”

“oh, libraries are wonderful, aren’t they?” the grand duchess replied, a grin growing across her face. she had quite a habit of tucking herself away in some secluded corner of a library and reading for hours on end. more than once she’d had to be retrieved so she could actually sleep in her room. “it is almost as if we all need to rest for a while and then... reconvene later. the rest would do us well.” tatianna mused. “i do not much think of people like you and i in high positions, but more so the people. as a group, they suffer more. individually... is debatable, but you know. generally speaking.”

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mywhclewcrld.

“The loyalty you displayed to your country is not something that should be played down, Grand Duchess Tatianna.” Mary replied, intwining her fingers with Tatianna’s. The touch, while small, was a huge relief to the princess. It was such an embarrassment to her, scaring someone she only wished the best for, it was a weight off her chest to think all was forgiven.

“And I must insist you forgive my rudeness, I have forgotten to introduce myself.” So caught up in the fright, it had slipped Mary’s mind. “I am Princess Mary Tudor, of England. It is a pleasure to finally meet you.”

with a flush, tatianna gave a soft huff, a gentle smile lighting her features. the hands clasped was a nice little indicator for a friendship, and considering the redhead didn’t have many of those, it filled her with a little bit of hope. the trip to paris was not something she had been especially excited for, but perhaps this was a sliver of hope for something good.

giving the other a polite curtsey, tatianna smiled. she had assumed the other was some sort of royalty, given her nature, and so the fact that she was a princess was unsurprising. “i have heard many wonderful things! it is so lovely to put a face to a name.”

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tiltedcrwncs.

“well i would never dare to prevent someone from practicing something that they considered their greatest skill,” martin teased back. he liked keeping the tone light, and if she was willing to play with her charm he could do so as well. “i think people should be very well versed in their talents.”

he was never sure what to do with public greetings. he knew that kissing hands was a common thing to do, but this woman seemed totally fall apart with the action and he felt bad about that. maybe he was just being silly about this and every other thing that he did in conversation. 

“i should hope my approval would mean very little, as it is your name that i am speaking about,” he said. the woman was younger than him, but he could not really tell by how much. “well it is much prettier than yanna i agree. yanna sounds like the name of an old woman, and you are not that,” he let out a bark of a laugh at her question. “i am afraid it is my turn to apologize now. my name is martin, i have no nicknames.” 

a soft hand came up to press against tatianna’s chest, a gentle laugh escaping her. it was rather difficult for her to make friends, if she was honest. and perhaps the spanish infante was just being polite to her, but the young thing was glad of some sweet and honest company. she wasn’t quite used to it, and it was refreshing for her.

red hair glinted under the light in the room as the young thing observed the room briefly. it seemed to be that she was not used to such softness without expecting something more sinister coming. she was sure he was fine, but instinct ( or perhaps too much experience with one nasty count ) had her eye wandering.

still, tatianna figured that martin was actually not actually so awful. in fact, he was quite lovely, and it was nice to have -- what felt like, at least -- the beginning of an actual friendship. it was nice to feel that. “yes, i suppose it does! you know, i’m not even entirely sure on where ‘yanna’ came from. i just remember hearing and responding to it.” the grand duchess explained, smiling. “it is wonderful to meet you, martin, but we shall have to make you one!”

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mylesxmoravec.

“and that my dear is the point. they may be miserable but i will surely be entertained,” myles responded. he probably wouldn’t end up throwing the glass, at least not yet - he wasn’t drunk enough to be too irrational. “i suppose it’s not horrible,” he replied. if he was being honest, he did like being away from home. home held too many memories, at least while here he could try and forget about them. “you believe in happy endings?”

with a soft giggle at the name, the grand duchess shook her head. his sentiment was a little to self serving for her understanding, but she could appreciate the humour in the situation. soft hands came to rest on her lap as her shoulders lifted, nose wrinkling in delight. he was quite charming, and the redhead was pleased to find she wasn’t so worked up that she couldn’t speak to him. “i do. it is, perhaps, a little naive, but i think happy endings are important to at least want. may i ask if you believe in them?”

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alixofbohemia‌.

Alix’s smile had grew when the duchess commented on her squealing, but then nodded as she continued to speak. She could understand perfectly where she was coming from. The Queen of Bohemia felt a little restless in Paris herself. “It is, is it not? The change of settings, and the number of people suddenly prancing around and being everywhere. It feels a little pressuring.” She replied with a soft hum. “I only hope that the signing ceremony will happen shortly, so that we may all go home.”

“i am used to spending time alone. not that i dislike company, but i am used to being a little apart from everybody. i do not feel comfortable telling people who are not my stuff what to do, so i just... let them be around.” tatianna explained, shrugging her fine shoulders, red curls tumbling around her. it just didn’t feel fair to her, which perhaps made her not quite fit to be royal. she was never really sure she was born to the right type of family. “i just hope it all goes well. we all deserve peace and quiet, i think, just to recover.”

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nielsofdanes.

Niels was always affectionate, even with near strangers, and small touches like the pat to his arm were enough to placate any concern he may have. He bestowed a warm smile upon her, mind well rid of all worries of having upset her. 

“As you wish,” he conceded with a nod of his head. “Instead of apologising, we shall simply agree to greet each other as friends in the future. As charming as your jumpiness may be, I do feel quite guilty when I am the cause of it.” He let out a laugh, a booming sound full of genuine warmth. “If only I were born with less responsibilities on my shoulders, so that I may visit more often. Denmark is well. We were lucky to have been untouched by war.” 

“no guilt!” the grand duchess insisted, a smile growing on her sweet face as he boomed out his grand laughter. “truly! it was not your fault. i won’t hear anymore of it.” the redhead said with a sure little nod. she didn’t want him to worry too much, after all.

tatianna was glad to see him, truly. niels was quite good company, even for somebody liked her who much preferred her solitude. and, with good news from denmark, she was pleased to hear that things were going well -- it allowed her to relax a little. the young thing had a habit of incessantly worrying about things well out of her control. “yes, i suppose that would inspire a lighthearted mood! one couldn’t blame you for that. tell me -- have you been here long? i’m still finding my feet and have yet to truly form an opinion.”