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If you truly love someone you must let them go, and if they come back again, it's meant to be. ❤
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Why?
Why do people hurt you? Why are you able to perceive it and deal with it? Why does time move on? Why does he feel this way? Why am I the one hurting? Why do I care? Why do I feel empathy towards him? Why do I love him like a brother? Why doesn't he feel the same way? Why can't I portray myself in the way I want? Why isn't it different? Why?
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Funeral hit me hard, I'm glad I could be there for her but it makes me realize that literally and probably intentionally barely know and never talk to any of my secondary family. More of my friends would be at my funeral than my actual family and even if they did come it's just because they're supposed to.. and the truly sad thing is is that I don't think I'm the one to even try to keep in touch, my mother, my father? ? The only person I've met is my father's new wife. Which I can't talk about because of my mother. Life sucks man, like where's my grandparents of my father? Does he have siblings? Aunts uncles I don't know and I probably never will. I wish life was different. I know that she will be a part of our family. But that's us. Where's my blood? Do tou give a fuck hello, help me understand my heritage, I'm tired of being my own father figure, I'm tired of acting okay. I'm fucking not.
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GIRL OF MY DREAMS
I met this girl over half a decade ago and she has seen me through so much; my unstable emotions and anger twisted with being destructive should have been an immediate red flag... but she's sitting right next to me... the girl of my dreams sitting 'HAPPILY I MIGHT ADD' right next to me. It's one thing finding someone who makes you happy, or someone you find attractive, but finding someone that you would happily sit next to for the rest of your life is fucking special and I wouldn't trade it for anything or anyone. I loved you then, I love you now; I will love you as much as I can for as long as i can. I will ensure the purity of our time together, and nothing will ever make us part; in this life or next.
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madame, might i get some seratonin? *the maid cafe waitress in my brain ignores me*
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