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Wally knows full well what he's doing

anyways im exploding i love them so bad

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Dick walked out onto the back terrace to find Jason and Alfred relaxing on lounging chairs sipping on pina colada’s and getting lost in the rays. He scoffed in amusement at the sight.

Dick: what are you two doing?

Jason simply pointed out to the yard with his drink which was fully decked with a pineapple chunk, an umbrella and a mini sponge on a stick?

Jason: Alfred set the nepo babies to mow the lawn.

Dick glanced out. Damian was wielding a weed whacker like a sword in his frustration, cutting down everything, even the lawn gnomes in his path. Tim was letting the push mower drag him at this point as he was screaming curses about eating bugs and branches hitting him.

They were doing more harm than good but it was the enjoyment of them suffering doing hard work that was so satisfying.

Dick slowly nodded as he made his way around a chair; his eyes never leaving them and their show of chaos as he picked up a drink off a tray along the way. He threw his leg around the lounger, plopped back and sat down with a perfect view.

Dick: well done.

Suddenly a loud engine came from his right. They turned their heads finding Bruce in sweats and a grass covered shirt slowly passing in front of them on possibly the oldest lawn mower in existence. He was obviously pissed as he was putting along in front of them like a parade.

Dick: all of them?

The lawnmower gave a bang and a jerk. Bruce’s eyes went wide as smoke then puffed in his face from the engine.

Bruce: fuck! This piece of-

He continued to start banging on the machine and dancing around it in some hopes it would miraculously start.

Alfred: yup.

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how often do you think he has a “this is someone’s baby” moment with the robins and why is your answer “all the time”

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(Dick, Tim, and Damian playing two truths and a lie)

Tim: "Okay my turn now. Um? Okay."

Tim: "I smoked on top of the Wayne Enterprises building with Jason, I stabbed myself the first time Dad tried to teach me how to use daggers, and I slept last night."

Dick/Damian: "Last one."

Dick: "I was literally there when you stabbed yoursel-"

Damian: "We've all smoked with Jason on the Wayne Enterprises building, like come on."

Dick/Tim: . . .

Dick: "Okay my turn."

Dick: "I graffitied the bat signal when I was twelve, I crashed the batmobile and blamed it on Jason but he was killed like two weeks later so I never forgave myself, and I'm allergic to kiwis."

Damian/Tim: "...?"

Dick: "Oh wait shit-"

Damian: "...They're all true aren't they?"

Jason, jumping out from under the couch: "I FUCKING TOLD HIM IT WAS YOU!!!"

Dick: "HOW LONG WE'RE YOU UNDER THERE??"

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The Bat-kids are no strangers to trauma. Each of them has been on the brink of death more than once, so they all take their injuries quite lightly.

The key word is “theirs.” They keep a particularly close eye on Dick. Their older brother has lost his quota of trust in taking care of himself after his second dehydration and countless hidden sprains.

Jason: drink some water

Dick: I've had one

Damian: when?

Dick: recently.

Tim, who has already opened up all the security cameras in the house and feels like a polygraph examiner: LIAR, the last time was yesterday!

Jason, pulling out a gun: you either drink some water like a normal person or I'll pour it into you

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Dick will break every single one of his moral codes for his siblings. He'll shatter himself into glass if it means his siblings are okay.

But if he sees the little brat on his couch one more time after his 12 hour shift, he'll start screaming.

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i do love the whole 'batkids all treat dick like he's a slut' but only when it's ironically. i like dick grayson who is a bit of a prude and his siblings mock the fuck out of him for this by making out like he's a complete manwhore. dick is... so tired.

dick: *steals tim's toast* tim: you fucking whore. dick: dick: tim i have slept with three people in my life and i was in long term relationships with all of them. tim: tramp-core. dick: ??? - dick: *walks in a room* are we ready to go? damian: are you really going to go outside wearing that, grayson? you look like a trollop. dick: I'M WEARING A TURTLENECK. damian: and? dick, pointing miserably at jason: HE'S WEARING A CROP TOP! jason: and fucking slaying, your point? - tim, walking into jason's apartment: hey jay, can i ask you someth- *notices dick* oh never mind. i'll ask later. dick: ??? why can't you ask in front of me? jason: is it similar to what you asked me about last week? tim: yeah. jason: ah. gotcha. we can talk later. dick: NO WHAT THE FUCK?! i'm your older brother too tim, whatever you want jason's help with i can help with too! tim: tim, sarcastically: you know what? sure. tim: got any advice for your younger brother who wants to give his new boyfriend his first ever blowjob? dick: jason: *grinning wildly* dick: tim: i'm waiting. dick: jason: it's alright, buddy. i gave damian the talk, i handled all of duke's dating questions, i can take this too. dick: i'm going to leave now. tim: yeah i bet you are. dick: i'm going to pretend this conversation never happened. tim: uh-huh, you know where the door is, slut. dick: dick: hOW THE FUCK AM I-

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“it’s circus work.” not to me. not if it’s my monkeys.

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heard someone frame dick grayson in real silly way i’d like to share with you.

nightwing is superbat’s lovechild he takes inspiration from the best of superman’s optimism and batman’s hope

nightwing is manman’s child of divorce he takes after the worse parts of his mentors: superman’s imposter syndrome with batman’s obsessive nature and paranoia

together they are world’s finest

MANMAN 💀

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Bruce and Dick both getting de-aged to 8 year old state but it just so happens that Bruce is just pre being orphaned and Dick is just post being orphaned so Bruce is such a happy, hyperactive kid and Dick is vengeful and violent and scared all the time and the rest of the Batfamily just don't know what to do.

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something about a legacy that was never supposed to become one. about a grief never meant to become a title. he drives me insane

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Dick is the sole owner of Wally’s closet

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It's important to me that Bruce likes his kids. Not just that he loves them - of course he does, if often imperfectly and at times even poorly - but that he genuinely enjoys being in their company. He likes them.