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I could have a cuter room if I wasn’t a goblin who threw all her shit on the floor

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EMILIA CLARKE @ the Heavenly Bodies: Fashion & The Catholic Imagination Costume Institute Gala at The Metropolitan Museum of Art | May 7, 2018 in New York City

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ive said it before and ill say it again

yehaw

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Brain: You’re a horrible, worthless, garbage person, and your life is going nowhere but to hell.

Me: I don’t know what the fuck you expect me to do about that at 11PM, my dude.

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i can’t believe how many people in their mid-20s are buying the amazon alexa and like hooking it up to their home security systems and lights and phone and shit like i know we all saw the 1999 disney channel original movie smart house. they warned us and you are playing with fire

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“i don’t wanna die, i sometimes wish i’d never been born at all” remains the rawest fucking lyric in the history of music thanks freddie

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my teacher : if you didn’t understand , why didnt you come ask for help ?

me :

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The sad truth is the truth is sad.

Lemony Snicket, The Hostile Hospital (via flame)

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Eliza: I thought you were better than this!

Alexander: Really? Why?

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Brain: You’re a horrible, worthless, garbage person, and your life is going nowhere but to hell.

Me: I don’t know what the fuck you expect me to do about that at 11PM, my dude.

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Can some of y’all stop taking pride in being bitter and nasty?

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stop telling girls that it’s normal to not enjoy sex. stop telling them that it’s never going to be as good as it looks in the movies. stop telling them that it’s okay if they rarely or never orgasm.

have high fucking standards. if you don’t really, really want to have sex with someone, don’t. if you aren’t really enjoying it–if it’s painful or uncomfortable or awkward–stop. it can be amazing and you shouldn’t have to settle for less.

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i wish i was an italian farmer pushing my wheelbarrow full of fruits and vegetables down a gravel path on the side of a hill towards the market in the center of town and didnt know what a tide pod was

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iphONES NEED TO BE STOPPED