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freakyjorker · 2 days ago

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CROSS YOUR MIND!

CHAPTER NINE : COFFEE AND CONFESSIONS

pairing: au paramedic!vi x er nurse!reader

cw: ya ts lowkey buns

4.1k words

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Your thumb hovered over your screen for what felt like an eternity.

The little message sat there, glowing against the dark background, a confession you couldn’t take back:

“I really like your sister and I don’t know if I messed it up.”

You stared at it until your eyes blurred.

For the first thirty seconds, you tried convincing yourself that maybe the message hadn’t sent, maybe the signal had dropped.

But no – there it was, neat and blue, mocking you with its finality.

And Jinx hadn’t answered.

You flopped onto your back on the couch, pressing the heel of your hand against your forehead.

What were you thinking?

Out of everyone in the world, you went and dropped that line to Jinx?

You couldn’t even imagine what she was doing right now.

Laughing? Screenshotting it? Running straight to Vi?

The quiet in your apartment stretched, heavy and unbearable.

You rolled onto your side, grabbed your phone again, and checked. Still nothing.

Two minutes passed.

Three.

You told yourself you weren’t going to check again, but of course you did.

Screen lighting up empty, except for the mocking reminder: Read 11:42 PM.

She’d seen it. She’d seen it and… what?

Was she composing some elaborate response? Or worse, showing it to Vi and letting her read it out loud?

Your chest tightened.

You shoved the phone under a pillow and sat up, running your hands through your hair.

Maybe you should just follow up with “jk ignore me” – pretend you were drunk, or delirious, or hacked.

Anything.

The buzz of a notification made you lunge for the phone. Heart hammering, you flipped it over.

Not Jinx. Just some random email.

You groaned, letting your head fall back onto the pillow. “Kill me now,” you muttered into the cushion.

Another minute crawled by.

Two.

You started counting your breaths, just to give your brain something to do.

By breath forty, the phone vibrated.

Your pulse spiked so fast it hurt.

Jinx: HA! I KNEW IT

Your stomach dropped, then twisted, then shot straight up into your throat. Relief and horror tangled together until you couldn’t tell which one was stronger.

You barely had time to respond before another barrage of messages popped up.

Jinx: knew knew knew knew knew knew knew it

You let the phone fall onto your chest and stared at the ceiling, eyes wide. Oh God. What had you started?

The typing dots blinked. Disappeared. Blinked again.

Every pause stretched your nerves tighter, like she was dangling you on a hook.

Jinx: don’t freak out Jinx: ok DO freak out Jinx: cause this is PERFECT

Your throat went dry. Perfect? What about this was perfect?

You fumbled to reply, fingers clumsy on the screen:

You: Jinx… please don’t make this into a thing.

Almost instantly:

Jinx: oh its a thing Jinx: we’re makin it a thing Jinx: but like. a GOOD thing Jinx: TRUST ME

You sat up straighter, clutching the phone like it might explode. Trust Jinx? You hardly even know her!

You: What are you planning?

Dots blinked again.

Too long this time.

You chewed the inside of your cheek, restless, every second stretching thinner.

Finally:

Jinx: just a lil sisterly assist ;)

Your stomach flipped.

Jinx: meet me @ Grayson’s Coffee tomorrow noon Jinx: and wear something nice. cute. like. you know. Jinx: the opposite of scrubs

You stared at the words, reread them, then reread them again.

You: …Why?

This time, it took her longer.

So long you started pacing, crossing the small stretch of your living room like a caged animal.

By the time your phone buzzed again, your chest ached from how hard your heart was working.

Jinx: cause i’m gonna fix your guys' mess.. duh

You froze mid-step, blinking at the screen.

Fix your mess?

What did that even mean?

The air felt too thin in your apartment, every inhale too shallow.

You: Jinx You: no You: wait

But she was already typing.

Jinx: she likes you back btw. she’s just dumb. Jinx: see u at noon sugarplum <3

And then nothing. No matter how long you waited.

You lowered the phone slowly, the blood rushing in your ears loud enough to drown out the silence.

“She likes you back.”

The words spun on repeat, louder than your thoughts, louder than your doubts.

You didn’t know if it was the truth or just Jinx being Jinx.

But the hook was already set, deep and impossible to shake.

Tomorrow.

Noon.

Coffee shop.

You pressed the phone to your chest and lay there, every nerve alive, a restless energy keeping you wide awake.

Anxiety gnawed at the edges of the possibility, but beneath it – somewhere you barely let yourself touch – was the sharp, dangerous spark of hope.

…

You barely slept. Every time you closed your eyes, your brain dragged you back to that same glowing screen, to Jinx’s string of chaotic texts and the one line you couldn’t stop rereading:

she likes you back btw.

It shouldn’t have had that kind of power over you.

It was just Jinx.

The same girl who sobbed into an old-beat up stuffy in the waiting room.

The same girl who full-on cackles at AI videos of cats dancing on Instagram reels.

Trusting Jinx with delicate matters was like asking a hurricane to hold your wine glass steady.

And yet, something about the way she typed it, the lack of irony or her usual dramatic flare, had hooked itself under your ribs.

You tossed and turned all night, staring at the outfit you’d already set out like it might bite you.

Nice enough to count as “cute,” but not so formal that Vi would think you were trying too hard.

You’d stood there in your bedroom holding up shirts like it was a life-or-death decision, before finally throwing one into your work bag and telling yourself: This will do. You’re being ridiculous.

The ridiculousness followed you into the morning.

Coffee barely cut through the fog.

The clock seemed to mock you with every red digit that blinked past.

You showered, dressed for your shift, double-checked that your 'cute' outfit was untouched and waiting for later, and headed into the hospital with a stomach knotted tight.

Maddie clocked you the moment you stepped onto the floor.

“You’re weird today.” She leaned against the counter, arms folded, eyes narrowing.

“I’m always weird,” you muttered, signing into the system, grateful for the shield of the computer screen.

“No, no,” Maddie shook her head, her ponytail swishing. “This is different. This is ‘something happened and you’re either not telling me because it’s bad or not telling me because it’s good.’ Which is it?”

You rubbed at your temple. “Nothing”

“Bullshit,” she said cheerfully.

You sighed. Maddie wasn’t going to let it go, and you were too tired to dance around her questions. So you told her, plain and flat: “Drop it or I'll kick your ass, Maddie"

She just laughs and nudges your shoulder in response.

…

The shift dragged.

Every thirty minutes felt like an hour.

You found yourself glancing at your phone compulsively, pulling it from your pocket every chance you got, screen lighting up your anxious reflection.

Nothing.

By ten a.m., you’d convinced yourself Jinx had forgotten.

By eleven, you were sure she’d been messing with you entirely, that the texts had been a prank and you’d been stupid enough to fall for it.

“Checking again?” Maddie’s voice cut through your spiral.

You shoved the phone back in your pocket. “No.”

She smirked, but didn’t press, just handed you a chart and nudged you toward a patient’s room.

Still, you could feel her amusement following you down the hall.

Time blurred.

The familiar rhythm of work carried you, but underneath it all, there was a restless buzzing in your veins.

Every conversation, every vitals check, every chart update — none of it landed, not really.

Your thoughts circled the same drain: What if she doesn’t text? What if she does? What if this is all a mistake?

And then — finally — your phone buzzed.

You nearly dropped the chart in your hands, fumbling to pull it free.

Jinx: remember, noon. don’t b late.

Your pulse rocketed. Noon. That was… less than an hour away.

You typed with shaky thumbs.

You: I’m working.

The reply was instantaneous.

Jinx: lol nice try Jinx: ur and vi's shift ends at 11:30

You froze. She checked?

You: Jinx.

Jinx: don’t back out. trust me.

…

When the clock finally ticked over to the end of your shift, you were already changed out of scrubs, bag slung over your shoulder like you were fleeing a crime scene.

“Whoa,” Maddie said, catching sight of you practically sprinting for the doors. “In a hurry much?”

You forced a casual tone that didn’t fool anyone. “Plans.”

She smirked knowingly. “Good luck.”

You froze. “What?”

“Nothing.” She lifted her hands, all innocence, but the grin stayed on her face. “Just… good luck.”

You groaned, muttered something under your breath, and escaped before she could pry anything else out of you.

…

The walk to Grayson’s Coffee felt like the longest of your life.

Your bag thumped against your hip with every step, your palms sweaty no matter how many times you wiped them on your jeans.

The streets blurred—cars, chatter, the smell of fresh bread from the bakery on the corner—but none of it anchored you.

Every block closer made your chest tighter. You rehearsed lines in your head, discarded them, started over.

Hi, Vi! Wanna tell me why you’ve been avoiding me?

Too sharp.

Hi. Can we talk?

Too soft.

Hi, I like you and I’m terrified and I don’t know what I’m doing but please don’t break my heart.

Too honest.

By the time the café came into view, you were lightheaded.

Noon sunlight bounced off the glass windows, people milled in and out with their lattes, and you could see the familiar crooked letters of the sign above the door.

You stopped on the curb, staring like it was the edge of a cliff.

Your heart thudded against your ribs. This was it. No more spiraling, no more waiting, no more pretending you didn’t care.

You drew a shaky breath, pushed the door open, and stepped inside.

The warm rush of coffee and sugar hit you first.

The hum of chatter, the hiss of the espresso machine. And then – just past the counter – you spotted a shock of blue hair bobbing at one of the tables near the corner.

Jinx was already there.

Waiting.

Your stomach flipped, nerves threatening to spill over.

This was really happening.

You spotted Jinx before she spotted you, which was saying something.

Or maybe it was just impossible not to notice her.

Jinx's blue hair is stuffed under a fedora three sizes too big, oversized sunglasses swallowing half her face.

Across from her, Isha sat sipping hot chocolate with both hands, equally ridiculous in a hoodie pulled so tight around her face only her nose was visible. A giant pair of heart-shaped shades perched crookedly on her cheeks.

You froze in the doorway, half in disbelief, half in horror.

Jinx caught sight of you, grinned wide enough to crack her face in two, and leaned back in her chair like a mob boss. “Target acquired.”

Isha giggled into her cup.

Dragging yourself across the café floor, you dropped into the empty seat between them.

“Really?” you hissed under your breath. “This is your idea of discreet?”

“What? Nobody suspects a thing.” Jinx tipped her hat lower with a dramatic flourish. “We’re invisible.”

Isha peeked over her shades at you and nodded excitedly before bursting into silent laughter.

You groaned.

“Relax, sunshine.” Jinx swirled the straw in her iced coffee. “This is gonna go smooth as silk. Isha’s here as backup in case you chicken out.”

“I’m not–”

“You were totally gonna chicken out.” Jinx waggled a finger at you.

“But don’t worry, Isha’s got your back.”

Isha shakes her head and waves to her hot chocolate with a smile.

Traitor.

Before you could snap back, the bell above the café door jingled. All three of you turned at once.

Vi.

She spotted Jinx instantly – fedora, sunglasses, and all – and the suspicion on her face deepened.

“What the hell are you wearing?”

“Fashion,” Jinx shot back.

Vi’s gaze slid from her sister… to Isha’s suspicious hoodie… and finally to you.

She froze, a flicker of confusion darting across her features. “Wait. What’s going on here?”

Jinx popped to her feet, clapping Vi on the shoulder as she passed. “I’ll be at the table in the corner.”

Isha waves her hands around at the table with a confused look, signaling that they're already at a table.

“Different table,” Jinx declared.

She tugged Isha up by the elbow, half-dragging her across the café.

“C’mon, hot chocolate buddy. We’re on surveillance.”

Isha waved at you from behind her shades as she shuffled along, quickly shooting a thumbs up with her gloved fingers.

And just like that, they were gone, leaving Vi standing in front of your table, arms crossed, brow furrowed.

You swallowed, forcing the words out before you could lose your nerve. “Sit. Please.”

For a moment, she just stared at you, jaw tense. But finally, she pulled out the chair and sank into it with a sigh, forearms braced on the table.

Her eyes searched yours, cautious. “Wanna tell me what this is about?”

Your pulse hammered, but you steadied your voice. “Wanna tell me why you’ve been avoiding me?”

Her brows shot up. “What? I haven’t—”

You just leveled her with a look. That steady, pointed silence that left no room for excuses.

She exhaled, gaze dropping to the table. “…Shit.”

From across the café, you heard the slurp of a straw and muffled giggling.

Vi’s jaw worked as though she were chewing on words she didn’t want to say.

The silence dragged long enough that you almost filled it for her, but then her shoulders dropped and she muttered, “Fine. Yeah. I’ve been avoiding you.”

Your chest tightened. You’d known it, but hearing her admit it made something sting deep.

“Why?” Your voice was quiet, sharper than you meant, but it slipped out like that anyway.

Her eyes flicked up to yours for the briefest second before darting away. “Because I didn’t know how else to handle it.”

“Handle what?”

“You.”

The word landed like a strike to the chest.

She dragged a hand through her hair, shaking her head with a low laugh that wasn’t amused at all.

“You drive me out of my mind. Every time I’m near you, it feels like – like if I’m not careful, I’ll say something that ruins everything.”

You swallowed, heat prickling at the back of your neck. “So instead you just… what? Shut me out?”

“Better than screwing you over,” she shot back, frustration laced in her voice. Then softer, guiltier: “At least, I thought it was.”

The blunt honesty in her tone made it harder to stay defensive. “Vi, you think not saying anything is better? You think pushing me away hurts less?”

She flinched at that, gaze dropping to her hands. Her fists clenched on the table like she was trying to hold herself together. “…I thought if I kept my distance, maybe the feelings would fade. Or you’d get tired of me and move on before I had a chance to mess it all up.”

The self-loathing in her voice made your stomach turn.

“Vi…” You leaned forward, lowering your voice. “Is that really what you think of me? That I’d just give up?”

Her throat worked as she swallowed hard. “Wasn’t just that,” she admitted after a long pause. Her voice cracked slightly, like she hated saying it out loud. “Then I saw you. With Sevika.”

Your breath hitched.

Her jaw tightened, like she was bracing herself. “I knew she’d been interested in you – who wouldn't? When I found out you actually… showed feelings back,” She exhaled sharply, leaning back in her chair like the words cost her. “I thought that was it. I thought I’d already lost.”

“Vi…”

She shook her head, bitter laughter spilling out. “Can you blame me? She’s got the guts I don’t. She’s not afraid to make a move. And me? I just–” She stopped, knuckles whitening as her hand curled into a fist against the table.

“I panicked. Instead of fighting for you, I just… disappeared. Like a coward.”

The ache in your chest deepened.

“I didn’t go out with her because I wanted her, Vi,” you said firmly. “I did it because you kept avoiding me. Because Maddie kept telling me maybe I should just… move on. Because you left me wondering if I’d been imagining everything between us.”

Vi’s head snapped toward you, eyes wide.

You met her gaze and didn’t look away. “You’re the one I want. Not Sevika. Not anyone else. You. But you made me feel like I wasn’t worth the risk.”

Her lips parted, but no words came out. For the first time, she looked completely unguarded – like you’d peeled away the tough edges she always carried like armor.

“I like you, Vi,” you said, plain and raw. “I don’t know how else to say it. I like you. And the only thing that hurts is you not letting yourself believe I could.”

Her breath hitched, and she pressed her hand over her mouth like the words were too much. When she finally lowered it, her voice was unsteady. “You don’t understand… wanting you isn’t the scary part. Losing you is.”

Something in your chest twisted.

“Then stop acting like you’ve already lost me,” you said softly.

Vi sat there, staring at you, like she couldn’t quite believe this conversation was happening.

Her fingers twitched against the tabletop before she finally reached across the space between you, hesitantly, almost like she was afraid you’d pull away.

You didn’t. You slid your hand into hers, and she squeezed tight.

“I don’t know how to do this,” she admitted, voice hoarse. “I’m shit at saying what I feel, and I don’t know if I can be the person you need me to be.”

You gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. “I don’t want some perfect version of you, Vi. I want you. Just you.”

Her chest rose and fell, shaky, her thumb brushing across your knuckles in slow circles.

For a moment, she looked on the verge of breaking – torn between relief and terror.

“…So what now?” she asked quietly, like she genuinely didn’t know how to move forward.

“Now?” You gave a small, tired smile. “You stop avoiding me. Start trusting me. And maybe… maybe let yourself believe this could be real.”

Her lips quirked, just barely, though her eyes were still glassy with vulnerability. “You make it sound so easy.”

“It doesn’t have to be easy,” you replied. “It just has to be honest.”

Vi let out a shaky laugh, squeezing your hand tighter, as though she was anchoring herself to you. “God, you don’t make this easy for me, you know that?”

“Good,” you shot back softly. “I’m not supposed to.”

And for the first time in what felt like forever, she didn’t try to hide the smile tugging at her lips.

It wasn’t much – it was cautious, fragile, full of things left unsaid – but it was a start.

For a long moment, neither of you moved.

Her hand was still clasped tightly around yours, her thumb brushing absent-minded circles over your skin as though she was afraid that if she stopped, you’d vanish.

The tension in her shoulders had eased just a fraction, enough that you could see the faintest cracks in the wall she always carried.

The café’s soft hum filled the silence – coffee machines hissing, a spoon clinking in a mug, the muted chatter of other tables.

It felt strangely far away, as though the world had shrunk down to just this table, just her hand holding yours.

You exhaled, slow, steady.

“So… maybe we don’t have to figure out everything right now,” you said gently. “We can just… start with this.”

Vi’s lips twitched into the barest smile. “Start with this, huh?”

You squeezed her hand, a little bolder now. “Yeah. Start with you not running every time you feel something.”

She gave a low laugh, the sound raw but warm, like she wasn’t used to letting herself laugh in moments like this.

“No promises,” she muttered, but the way her thumb kept tracing your knuckles betrayed the truth. She was trying.

You tilted your head toward the door, your smile soft. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”

Her brows lifted, surprised. “What? Now?”

“Yes, now.” You stood, still holding her hand, tugging her gently out of the booth.

She followed, like she couldn’t quite bring herself to let go.

As you both walked toward the door, Vi kept glancing down at your intertwined hands, her expression shifting – nervous, thoughtful, but every so often, her grip tightened, like she was reminding herself this was real.

The late afternoon air outside was crisp, carrying the faint smell of rain.

The sky was heavy with clouds, but there was a strange brightness in the way she looked at you under the dim streetlights.

You slowed your steps, giving her the chance to let go if she wanted.

But she didn’t.

Instead, she shoved her free hand into her jacket pocket, shoulders hunched, as though embarrassed by how much she wanted to hold onto you.

Neither of you spoke at first.

The silence wasn’t sharp anymore – it wasn’t heavy like before.

It was tentative, fragile, the kind of quiet that came when two people were learning how to breathe together again.

Finally, Vi cleared her throat, her voice low. “You’re really not gonna let me screw this up, huh?”

You gave her a sidelong look, lips curling into a faint smile. “Not a chance.”

a/n: lowkey an ass ending but hopefully i'll write an epilogue when i can and im SO SORRY it took so DAMN long omfg im evil, but thank you so much for reading the series and showing support on my first ever series

taglist: @miffyscakes @sevikas-whore @draculu @autisticratbagtm @riotstemple29 @jupitism @mel6ncholixc @mariesmagix @tsujifreya @snuffphiliaa

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