freespeechtroll

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🎤 NEW PARODY DROP: MISTAKES IS HIGH A brutal, unapologetic remix of De La Soul’s Stakes Is High—rewired with political venom, legal satire, and righteous lyrical fire.

This ain’t a tribute. It’s a warning. 📛 Surveillance. 📛 Censorship. 📛 Fascism dressed as freedom.

“Make no mistake. Fight fascism now.”

📖 Part of my upcoming book on free speech & constitutional collapse 📢 Share it before they shadowban it

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My name is Mosab Ahmed, and I'm a father to three beautiful daughters: Lina, Lama, and Alma.

We are living in a tent ⛺ after the war destroyed our home 💔. I lost my job, and we can't even afford a loaf of bread 🥖. My daughters can't sleep from hunger 😢. We are slowly dying in silence.

I'm injured and urgently need a second surgery on my shoulder 🩼. My 4-year-old daughter Lama had metal plates inserted in her hand and now desperately needs food and care 🥺🍲, but we can't even afford basic necessities.

Please... even a €5 donation could save us 🙏. If you can't donate, please just share my story 🔁 — every share can reach a kind heart ❤️.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

@hopeformusab – Every share makes a difference ✨

https://gofund.me/2e8603b5

I have made an anonymous donation and will share your story. May the world be on your side.

[freespeechtroll]

Fascism. It's here.

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Deportation Nation – Trump-Era Immigration "Crazy Rap" Parody (Remastere...

[freespeechtroll]

What happens when you remix Afroman’s Crazy Rap into a 7-minute musical political takedown of ICE raids, Trump-era immigration policy, and authoritarian power grabs?

You get Deportation Nation.

This isn’t a subtle commentary. It’s a direct, animated uppercut in cartoon form—with lyrics that roast the U.S. legal system so hard they probably need a lawyer.

📖 Blog + lyrics: https://freespeechtroll.com/2025/05/12/new-parody-drop-deportation-nation-an-immigration-diss-track-with-a-cartoon-liver-punch/

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Introducing: The Ball Sack Test

We’ve had enough of the Lemon Test and its lifeless citrus metaphors. It’s time to make American legal doctrine sexy, vulgar, and memorable.

In my latest piece, I propose a complete rebranding of constitutional tests around the male anatomy. It’s not just satire. It’s ball-sy jurisprudence.

👉 Read: Sucky Balls, Donkey Balls, Ball Sack Jurisprudence

[freespeechtroll]

Four vocalists. One raccoon. A blurred mess of anarchic patriotism. This SATB hymn is what happens when you read the Constitution and then say, “Cool. Let’s roast it.” Also featuring:

A Chinese spy (allegedly)

Revoked Visas

Censored eyes

A flaming American flag

A choir that did NOT consent to being in this video, probably

Full blog post available at: https://freespeechtroll.com/2025/05/06/funeral-hymn-1776-amazing-waste-satb-parody/

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✨ New post: Dumpster Dive 1: Schooling a Random Trumptard I take a MAGA meatball’s blog post about “freedom of religion” and roast it until the Establishment Clause gets a tan. Things I cover: ✅ The Titwaffle Fallacy ✅ Constitutional literacy ✅ The Supreme Court’s “stop being dumb” clause ✅ Masturbation metaphors

[freespeechtroll]

How Expired Milk Helped Save Free Speech (No, Really)

Long ago, Congress banned something called “filled milk” because it was probably an abomination to God and gastrointestinal tracts. Then the Supreme Court got bored. Then they wrote a footnote. Then the footnote mutated into the basis for one of the most important doctrines in American constitutional law. Now I’ve translated it all into a rant involving Samuel L. Jackson and the judiciary’s lactose intolerance.

🍼

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Benjamin “Big Benjie” Franklin: America’s First DILF-in-Residence

He didn’t invent electricity. He invented Enlightenment thirst traps. Ben Franklin’s legacy includes bifocals, the lightning rod, and banging his way through Paris while writing raunchy letters about old ladies. Check out his roast and Tinder profile in full colonial cringe: 🐿️ https://freespeechtroll.com/2025/05/01/big-benjies-diplomacy-a-founding-fathers-guide-to-sex-syphilis-and-statesmanship/

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We mourn the loss of mediocrity. We celebrate the death of the myth. We rise from the ashes of James Madison's failure.

Funeral Hymn 1776: Amazing Waste now burning.

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We're gonna overthrow the government. But not right now. Today, we're doing brunch.

New post is up. Read it, degenerates.

Featuring Brandenburg v. Ohio (1969) — America's finest constitutional loophole for sedition brunch.

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Apparently I’m now annoying enough that people are restacking my tantrums on Substack.

Appreciate the reckless support.

Tomorrow night (Sunday U.S. time), I’m dropping a new post at freespeechtroll.com:

Cross-burning and free speech

Brandenburg v. Ohio, brunch edition

Why yelling stupid shit isn’t (always) illegal

If you like your constitutional law profane, confusing, and slightly drunk, stay tuned.

New post lands tomorrow. Same troll energy. Slightly more diagrams.

– Veritas Dickworth Professional legal disappointment

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How do you scream “death to Trump” in a dream and still pass a constitutional test?

Part 3 of my book intro is here: Schrödinger’s Cat, Agent Dickface, and the Xanax of Free Speech.⚖️

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Tomorrow, we complete the trilogy. Featuring a cat, some legal Xanax, and a polite hypothetical on a dead Donald Trump.

Subscribe now or live in ignorance.

Catch up with Part 2 and hover your lazy ass over that link. (You gotta click it, dumbass.)

[freespeechtroll]

If you've ever googled "Can I yell 'fuck' at a judge and not go to jail?"--same. You might enjoy the profane free speech book I'm working on, which now has a blog. Today, I screamed "context" and may or may not have made the Secret Service sigh deeply. ⚖️