friendly-muttonchops

[friendly-muttonchops]

little kids make me laugh. i was at a party yesterday and a kid was there and she noticed that i have a long straight cut along the length of my thumb and asked about it, so i told her it was a cat scratch, almost healed, didn't hurt. and then she was sorta staring and touching it for a bit and went "you had bone surgery. because there were termites in your bones."

so i played along and went "oh man, i hope they got em all!" and she went "no. they put in more." lmao

[friendly-muttonchops]

[friendly-muttonchops]

Add realism to your fantasy stories by having characters from different backgrounds struggle to pronounce each others' names.

"My name is [low guttural sound] but I don't want to hear you butcher it. So you may call me She Who Arises With The Cold Mountain Sun."

"...Is that what your name really means? All that in just one word?"

"Yes. If you stress the wrong syllable it comes out as 'She Who Coldly Wakes Up The Mountain Sun', or 'The Cold Woman Who Wakes The Mountain Sun', and you will not call me that."

"Oh, huh. Could we just call you Mountain Sun, for short?"

"Hmh. It's boastful, almost bordering on blasphemy, but it is flattering. I accept it."

[friendly-muttonchops]

Upside to stop and go traffic- I could get a picture of these absolutely iconic bumper stickers.

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its a mystery

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crab crab crab hand hand hand frighten

[friendly-muttonchops]

[friendly-muttonchops]

what "no sugar added" should mean: the natural sugars of the other ingredients like fruit are the only source of sweetness in this product

what is actually means: we added a fuckton of artificial sweeteners

[friendly-muttonchops]

[friendly-muttonchops]

This captures something I don't think I'll ever be able to put in to words.

Oh how I love shaun tan.

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“A Boar and some Boarlings out for a stroll”

(via)

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Fuck no

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[friendly-muttonchops]

[friendly-muttonchops]

skweezy jibbs is a international treasure

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What books have you done this to?

Instagram / Shop

[friendly-muttonchops]

im readinge the book with mama