fullofmetalalchemist

[fullofmetalalchemist]

blue sky and white clouds in ili by 刘知著

[fullofmetalalchemist]

Views from the ancient settlement

[fullofmetalalchemist]

choices have been made at the local library

[fullofmetalalchemist]

my sister sent me and my mom a meme about mean girls today, and I told them they’re now legally obligated to celebrate a real national holiday (october 3rd) since we watched fma together

which prompted us teasing my mom about when she asked me what their names were after we literally finished watching the final episode

and she asked if she could ‘read the book instead’ so she could take notes

[fullofmetalalchemist]

If I can, this will be finished by tomorrow!

[fullofmetalalchemist]

don’t forget.

[fullofmetalalchemist]

3 oct

[fullofmetalalchemist]

Happy Oct 3rd

[fullofmetalalchemist]

Now, let's go home. Together.

DON'T FORGET

3rd Oct. 11

[fullofmetalalchemist]

Ed looking at his brother over the years. (Happy Elric house fire day!!)

[fullofmetalalchemist]

[fullofmetalalchemist]

[fullofmetalalchemist]

Doodle of Ed from the other day :)

[fullofmetalalchemist]

Don’t forget…

[fullofmetalalchemist]

It's actually so important to me that the first time we see Ed actually cry in Fullmetal Alchemist (Brotherhood and Manga) - apart from the automail surgery - is when Hohenheim offers him his life to bring back Alphonse.

Throughout the entire story Ed doesn't cry because of his misguided love-filled promise to Al. No matter how horrible their odds, no matter how traumatizing their journey, Ed refuses to cry. He comes close. So, so close. When Izumi tells them it's okay to be sad, offering comfort after a long time without. After Nina dies and Ed and Al let the rain wash away their sorrow. When Hughes dies and guilt becomes an even heavier cloak weighing their shoulders down. When death comes knocking on Ed's door and he decidedly sends it packing.

Ed laughs and rages and smiles and screams.

But he doesn't cry.

Just because Al can't.

Ed was eleven when he made that promise. He was a child suffering through something truly horrific when he promised himself and the world that he wouldn't cry as long as his brother wasn't allowed to do the same.

Which is painful to watch - especially since it tells us that Ed knows how much crying is a part of life. He gave something up, not out of some misguided idea of masculinity, but because he knew it would be a sacrifice to keep himself from crying. A punishment since his brother could no longer offer his tears in the face of sorrow.

But by the end of the story Ed has cried. And it's not tears of joy, like the ones he promised Winry. No, Ed is angry when he cries - and Alphonse is no longer there.

In a way Ed kept his promise to Al - he only cried when the person he made this promise to (be it silent and secretive) was gone.

As far as they knew Al was dead.

But that truth alone didn't bring tears to Ed's eyes, though it certainly shattered his heart and made him quiver in desperation. No, in the end it was Hohenheim who finally allowed Ed to spill tears kept locked away for four long years.

And I love it.

I love that Hohenheim trying to do something truly loving, something completely selfish, something absolutely sacrificial was the thing that pushed Ed over the edge.

Because Ed never forgave his father for leaving, but by the end of the story he understands why he left.

Because Ed is so unbelievably angry with this man who abandoned him, and he still cares for him - partially because he knows Alphonse does.

Because Ed was never forced to forgive Hohenheim, but we still know that Hohenheim loves his children and his wife and would do everything for them.

Even, no, especially if it means dying.

And Ed can't take it.

So many others have died by this point, they are all painted in blood and pain, and Ed has lost his only constant - and now his father wants to make an ultimate sacrifice?

No.

So, Ed gets angry. And he cries. And he saves Al on his own - with the help of all of his friends, and Hohenheim.

Because no matter Ed's feelings on the man who gave him life, he doesn't want to see anyone else die. He doesn't want anyone else's blood on his hands.

And he wants Hohenheim to get a chance to be a rotten father - because at the end of the day Hohenheim is someone worth crying over even, no, especially by the boy who promised he wouldn't cry.

(there is something to be said about Hohenheim crying on their family portrait, only to be mirrored by Ed grinning while holding his own child - there is something to be said about Hohenheim willingly offering his life, only to be stopped by the tears running down his son's angry face - there is something to be said about Ed's anger and Hohenheim's soft grief and their shared past)

[fullofmetalalchemist]

[fullofmetalalchemist]