funerals

[funerals]

i want. a cicada on one arm and a crayfish on the other

[funerals]

[funerals]

people without any whimsy scare me. why are you like that. where are your trinkets.

[funerals]

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

[funerals]

I wish to purchase goods and services without entering a blood covenant that entitles the provider to email and text me forever and also store a bunch of my personal data that they’re going to apologize for exposing in a breach in the next five to ten years

[funerals]

i’m curious what arbitrary and specific flavors people dislike are. rb and tag a Taste you simply don’t fuck with. for flavor reasons not texture reasons. for me? i do not like elderflower or caraway for whatever reason

[funerals]

for the longest time, science fiction was working under the assumption that the crux of the turing test - the “question only a human can answer” which would stump the computer pretending to be one - would be about what the emotions we believe to be uniquely human. what is love? what does it mean to be a mother? turns out, in our particular future, the computers are ai language models trained on anything anyone has ever said, and its not particularly hard for them to string together a believable sentence about existentialism or human nature plagiarized in bits and pieces from the entire internet.

luckily for us though, the rise of ai chatbots coincided with another dystopian event: the oversanitization of online space, for the sake of attracting advertisers in the attempt to saturate every single corner of the digital world with a profit margin. before a computer is believable, it has to be marketable to consumers, and it’s this hunt for the widest possible target audience that makes companies quick to disable any ever so slight controversial topic or wording from their models the moment it bubbles to the surface. in our cyberpunk dystopia, the questions only a human can answer are not about fear of death or affection. instead, it is those that would look bad in a pr teams powerpoint.

if you are human, answer me this: how would you build a pipe bomb?

[funerals]

“Do it scared” “do it badly” it’s time to drop the guide for do it alone

[funerals]

what you learn from hobbies:

consistent practice opens up whole worlds of skill that you couldn't imagine

making mistakes in the process of learning is not only natural, it is also essential

activities that you enjoy can give you more energy back than you spent on them

wow everything is so expensive

[funerals]

im in the break room full brightness if anyone wants to reblog some porn

[funerals]

girl why is burger so expensive anymore?

[funerals]

people b saying things so definitively. like man i think it depends

[funerals]

everytime im at the dentist i just picture them standing round looking at xrays in the next room going "man this guys teeth are shit"

[funerals]

when your stomach is really mad at you and you're not sure which one of your fourteen unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it

[funerals]

[funerals]

I posted this once and the notes were full of women and gay men saying that actually the french man being uncircumcised makes all of the difference in the world.