funnylittlefiona

[funnylittlefiona]

Fiona yelling at Sylvia for some minor infraction.

Me: you don’t get to yell at the kids!

F: but I’m GOOD at yelling. And I like yelling. Especially at children!

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Last night when the kids were with a sitter, Sylvia made a deal with Max. At bedtime she went back on the deal but since I wasn’t around to witness the deal I didn’t have any context about what was going on.

Fiona: mom, this feels like it could really be a teachable moment for you with Sylvie. Parents love doing teachable moments, don’t they?

8/29/25

[funnylittlefiona]

Max really wanted to go to chess camp so I signed him up and decided it would be good for Fiona to try out too. She’s been less than thrilled-

[funnylittlefiona]

Making sure Max knows what’s allowed or isn’t for waking her up. 🤣

[funnylittlefiona]

“Tomorrow my goal is to wake up at 6am!”

Me: why?

F: because I want to be PRODUCTIVE!

Me: what do you have planned?

F: well, I’m thinking skincare? And breakfast. And then I’d like to put some ice water in my mouth.

5/24/25

[funnylittlefiona]

Fiona had a sleepover this weekend and stayed up til after 2am. The next day she told me she was cranky.

Me: well, you chose to stay up that late so you don’t get to be cranky.

Fiona: you don’t want me to be MYSELF?

Me: you can be a chipper version of yourself.

F: but that would be fake. You don’t want me to be FAKE, do you, mother??

Me: yes, yes I do.

5/19/25

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[funnylittlefiona]

We’ve been fostering some puppies this week and had to take them to an adoption event. We walked in and Fiona said “who’s in charge here? I’d like to talk to someone about a job!” 🤣

[funnylittlefiona]

Fiona wanted to put makeup on Sylvie and acted like she was doing a YouTube tutorial or something-

Fiona: now, usually I’d start with concealer but this child isn’t old enough to have bags under her eyes yet so I’ll be skipping that step….

[funnylittlefiona]

Told Fiona earlier “hey I’d really like to watch the fever game tonight”.

She goes “mom I think you got it twisted - you’re the adult and we are the children. You can do whatever you want!”

SINCE WHEN??

6/21/24

[funnylittlefiona]

Fiona: “Is it just me or do you all sometimes want to wake up in the middle of the night and go out on the lawn and act like a panda?”

Me: it’s just you.

5/24/24

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4/11/24

Fiona has taken an EXTREME liking to golden retrievers in general but especially to a golden retriever puppy in the neighborhood. He’s 10 weeks old and his name is Pax and any time he’s being walked she will run out to yell “I LOVE YOUR PUPPY!”

Anyway, I got his mom’s number and now Fiona is begging me to text her.

F: Ask her what her address is

Me: why?

F: so I can go over to her house and ask if I can walk her dog.

Me: no, I’m not going to do that. That’s weird and we’ll come off like stalkers.

F: I don’t want to stalk her. I just want to be able to show up at her door whenever I want.

She also made him a painting of himself.

[funnylittlefiona]

Fiona: Max! Money doesn’t buy you happiness - dogs do! Don’t you know that?

3/19/24

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3/16/24

[funnylittlefiona]

Fiona was trying to teach me some French pronunciation and I kept botching it (not intentionally)

F: MOM! Why can’t you say it right?

Me: I don’t know, but I’m trying my best.

F: …yeah, I know. It’s just that your best is pretty bad.

3/2/24

[funnylittlefiona]

Jeffs 45th birthday is coming up and we were discussing how to spend the day.

Max: mom! If I didn’t know better I’d say you were 36.

Me: oh thank you honey.

J: how old would you say I am?

Fiona: oh. Let’s just change the subject.

Max: well….you have very gray hair.

J: what if I had brown hair?

Max: ok….maybe 40. But mom looks 36.

2/15/24