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sometimes tiktok is actually incredibly good

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I want to be able to enter other peoples' dreams, but not for any purpose, just to vibe in there. Like you'll be having a symbolic significant experience of your lifetime where a manifestation of your subconscious sense of self-preservation appears to you in the form of the one good wise friend that your mind knows you'll listen to, telling you to Stop Doing That Thing You're Doing, and you're getting distracted by some tiny mf guy on the wall

driving a WV beetle the size of a ladybug, moving in straight lines and 90 degree angles, after tiny blipping dots that disappear when he reaches them, with a trail of them behind him

not doing anything. just using this wall in the unconscious landscape of your dreams to play Nokia 3310 retro snake. I'm close to making a new record.

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It would be fun to re-learn french, but specifically go for one of the African dialects, just to make it clear that even if I only learned the language to be able to talk to more people, I have no respect for the colonialism. It took immense violence to put french into Africa, but now no amount of violence can take Africa out of french. And I'm joining this fight specifically against you.

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Rules of DIY:

if it's a skill, there's rules you can learn

if it's an art, rules are not your concern

make it fucked up or you won't make it

if it's already broken, you can't break it

anything can be fixed with gorilla glue

except for pleather, and also you

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If you put a dish in a dishwasher, it gets washed. If you put a shirt in a dishwasher, it gets shredded and breaks the machine.

If you put a shirt in a washing machine, it gets washed. If you put a dish in a washing machine, it gets shattered and breaks the machine.

Maybe you are not weak. They just put you into the wrong washer.

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It's important to remember that Luigi Mangione is being framed for murder. The "evidence" they have on him is absolute clown shoes absurd.

They're trying to win this by swaying public opinion. That's why they're doing movie deals about it and staging ridiculous photo ops.

They're gonna try to give this kid the death penalty to cover up for their own gross incompetence and in the hopes that they scare the working class out of trying to fight back.

Please don't help them do this by using his name as a synonym for political assassinations. Please do not perpetuate the idea that he's guilty.

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welcome to the Murdersex zine, a zine celebrating all things sex and murder. but um. we don't want to romanticize it or anything so don't make your submissions too murdersexy. we will do extensive background checks on all applicants and if we decide a past work of yours has too much sexy murder we'll have to remove you, sorry. we have limits, you know, we want a tasteful gory spread you could put on your coffee table, and having the Wrong people in it would kill the vibe (and we condemn all killing! wholeheartedly!)

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the prevalence of "daddy" and "mommy" stuff really highlights that most people understand the appeal of ageplay and incest stuff on some level actually. like why do i have to explain this stuff to you you call bowser daddy too right

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as a cis guy, when presented with the "99% you get a ton of money, 1% you turn into a girl" it honestly would be dumb to not hit that button until it breaks. like ok now i have 100 bajillion dollars and gender dysphoria. big deal. i have all the money in the world to turn me back into a guy. like with that kind of money i could have obama do me a phalloplasty. he wouldnt be able to do it as he isnt a surgeon but the point still stands

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the worst thing about house of leaves is how Stupid I look reading it in public lmao. yes I know I’m holding the book upside down and turning it in circles

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Fae girl initially uncertain what to do when she's informed that the traditional courting gift for a human is a bouquet of cut flowers, but is also informed that the human she's interested in has an allergy to flowers

So she convinces some appropriately colourful mushrooms to make themselves look like flowers for ornamental purposes and gifts her a bouquet of those instead

Human mycologist holding this extremely toxic but very pretty bouquet like... How did you get them to grow in these... Shapes...?

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a scene must be included PRIOR to sex where the characters READ their birth certificates OUT LOUD so the reader will know they were born on the SAME DATE to avoid any disgusting AGE GAPS