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dan's grandma: here's some chocolate, dear 🥰

dan: ok so a basic fact about Phil Lester, you ignorant slut

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Best RPF Ship - FINAL!

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Best RPF Ship - FINAL!

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something really funny about phil learning what rpf is and then like two days later becoming very invested in phan beating jesus in a tumblr rpf poll,, like he really said not only is rpf fine but I’ve GOT to get competitive about it

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someone: hi

dan, touching phil's hair: pffff you think I like touching phil's hair?? lolll

someone: I just said hi-

dan: AHAHA LOSER you think I like phil's hands because they're soft like snow and I tell everyone about them???? pffff IDIOT

someone: okay

dan: anyway did I tell you about phil's hands

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dan should go as sam the surfer for halloween so he can be his own sleep paralysis demon

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not to be repetitive but whenever they post things like this I always think of the people who are still like 'well we don't know for sure they're together' and it makes me giggle every time, ah yes my favorite exes dan and phil, having couples therapy as a celebration of their 15 year anniversary on their couple channel

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miss fake slut I saw you be completely oblivious to the hot waiters because you're 'too tired' but then immediately huffing and rolling your eyes when your pal gives them the eyes. failing your slut era and losing the idgaf war in one go. loser!

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this video is kinda capitalester's most genious accomplishment, like an excuse for them to share their domestic grievances about each other and also brag about their long-ass relationship and mention as many times as possible that it's their 15 year anniversary while still having the excuse that it's their youtube anniversary, all while doing a sponsorship AND selling a shirt. and the shirt? it's about the damn anniversary

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perhaps we need to ban the phrase ‘hard launch’.. sometimes things that are not a hard launch are still good

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not to overthink an obviously ironic sketch made for laughs, but my interpretation is that the disgust on their faces is not about the idea of kissing each other, but rather about doing it in front of a camera to act out a ridiculous imaginary scenario made up during an era where they often weren't seen as actual people but more as fictional characters. it's another version of writing fanfiction about themselves, except in this case it's like they're reading out already existing phanfics. so in this moment they're playing those fictional characters, the fictional 2014-tumblr-esque brand of "phan", the one that was never real, because it was always just a fanfic version of them. so they are disgusted and they're making fun of those versions of them and the people who used to see them like that, as it is their right, but it's more a gentle kind of teasing than malicious mocking. they're not so much laughing at us, but rather laughing with us, and that's the difference in this new era

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thank god dan and phil are unquestionably gay now or twitter would have started queerbaiting discourse straight from a 2015 nightmare

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you don’t need to imagine it anymore

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What is going on with Agatha? I don't have Twitter

*SPOILERS WARNING for the latest episode*

from what I've seen, there are 1) people upset that billy was the focus of the last episode instead of agatha (and/or rio), 2) people upset that billy is looking for tommy and not wanda, 3) people upset that the first kiss in the show was m/m instead of f/f, 4) comics fans upset that some things are different from the comics, 5) people mad that wanda may in fact not appear in the show, 6) people just generally mad at billy and/or joe locke's casting for some reason.

I think that covers it.. like is it me or are people more miserable than usual these days, like my god lighten up, go look at a flower, read a book, adopt a cat

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joe locke is the love of my life he's so good in everything he's in

honestly I didn't think much of it when he was cast as billy (because we all knew who he was playing lbr) but he's actually so good! I'm really enjoying his character, I don't understand all the hate I've seen

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agatha all along is the first marvel thing I've had interest in and enjoyed in years and I thought it would be a fun fandom experience, but I made the mistake of looking at twitter and boy what the fuck are people smoking over there

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dan for the past 5 years: I am my own man, a one-man show, a solo act, yes I live with someone but that has nothing to do with my job of being a very serious solo comedian

dan now: my true calling in life is being a wife <3