greedo3318

[greedo3318]

hi I hope you don't mind me requesting!! popular reader who's really into loser nerds and fortunately (or unfortunately) bill dickey is exactly her type ^^

a/n: i have never been even remotely close to popular (no shit, i write fanfiction in my free time for fucksake) so a lot of this is guessing unfortunately 

also my computer literally broke & would not charge at all so thats why im so behind on requests. IM SORRY. THEY ALL SHOULD BE OUT SOON.

having a crush on bill dickey, no matter who you are, is definitely unfortunate

i can see bill finding himself in situations where girls will ask him out as a joke in middle school/early high school and so now his guard is completely up

this probably also adds to his hatred for women. can this guy be normal.

so if you show any visual interest in him he assumes you’re making fun of him

his jaw tenses and his face quivers and he’s glaring daggers into you. he doesn’t hold back on screaming at you to leave him the fuck alone.

unfortunately screaming at you in the middle of the hallway definitely gets him bullied worse.

all of your friends poke fun at you for your taste in men and so you don’t even tell them you actually DO want bill completely unironically 

some of them have a sneaking suspicion though because you’re constantly defending him when your friends make fun of him

“you guys are being cruel, he didn’t do anything. who cares if he’s into some loser comics?”

“you’re only saying that because you’ve got a thing for him.”

“I DO NOT.”

but you're profusely blushing and very clearly nervous

the only way i can see him interacting with you is if he’s forced

like if you two are in a group project together 

(you definetly end up doing all the work in an attempt to make him like you - it doesn't work)

even then his guard is up and he spends more time scoffing under his breath and scowling than talking to you

even if he DOES like you back he’s completely convinced that you’re pulling an elaborate prank on him when you reciprocate said feelings

it results in a lot of distancing himself from you 

i can’t see you two getting together until post-high school when there's no hierarchy keeping him on his toes constantly 

at a high school reunion his mom forced him to go to, he’s in the corner sulking, the guys are ignoring him because of the comic con incident, and you're the only one who goes up and talks to him… yeah

saying something to him in passing along the lines of "i had the biggest thing for you in high school and you never noticed” and everything just clicks for him suddenly

bill constantly having his guard so high up and being so defensive that he can’t ever bring himself to believe whats RIGHT in front of him :(

i’m sure the relationship isn’t healthy but its way better than it would have been if you would have gotten together in high school

[greedo3318]

hi i’ve gotten several requests for transmasc readers and i just wanted to let everyone know that i don’t CURRENTLY write for male readers (cuz i feel im not fully prepared to and need to do more research on writing from that perspective especially as a cis woman) but im not getting rid of said requests because i probably eventually start writing for m!reader. just not at the moment!!

also i am getting to everyone’s requests ive just been busy recently so dont worry if you sent something a while ago and i haven’t replied yet… im workin on it!!!

[greedo3318]

hi! could i please request bill dickey x fem! goth reader? maybe she also loves movies and wants to become a director if thats not too specific lol

a/n: guys stop apologizing for being too specific in my asks. hyperspecific requests are my favorite.

also my hatred for superhero movies and my pretentious ass taste in film kinda comes out here im sorry.

cw: nothin i don't think

i have dealt with my fair share of “i need a goth baddie” men and i can say with certainty that pete is one of those men but i cannot see bill being one

you can totally argue that vamperilla is goth but i dont think he likes her because of that i think he’s just pervy.

i think bill would probably more likely just make fun of the way you dress.

not to your face, you freak him out too much for that, but in hushed whispers to jerry

he doesn’t fuck with you like how he would other girls because he is genuinely scared of you

he associates your look with jane’s girl gangs so he kinda just assumes you're gonna beat the fuck out of him if he even glances in your general direction

so you have to talk to him first

which shocks him to his core. hes never had a girl talk to him first.

because he’s gone out of his way to avoid you youre not aware of how fucking shitty he is. you just think hes a stereotypical nerd.

he definitely uses this to his advantage to get you to go out with him.

when you do start dating i think jane definitely pulls you aside and begs you to leave him.

YOURE TOO COOL FOR HIM!!!

bill canonically hates all music, we know this, but he especially hates goth music

he bitches about it being whiny like hes not the most whiny person of all time.

when you mention interest in film he just assumes you mean the shitty obscure horror movies that pete watches

he does not have a clue in the world when you start talking about actual critically acclaimed films

bill hates not being able to one up people on his interests and it especially pisses him off that your babbling of “davidlynchptaspikeleejohnwaterstamarajenkinstoddsolodnz” is complete and utter nonsense to him.

all he can let out is a scoff and a “who?”

i genuinely do not think he’s seen anything outside of blockbuster comic book adaptations and the occasional horror/fantasy/sci-fi movie.

“you wanna be a director…?”

he says it in the most snarky fucking tone too dude fuck you

youre not even sure if hes saying it because youre a girl or if hes saying it because of the way you dress (spoiler, its both)

please god make fun of him for only watching the worst superhero slop youve ever heard of. how can he even live like this.

he is definitely one of those people who thinks a movie not being mainstream immediately means its bad. he’s completely brainrotted.

on a more positive note: making student films and forcing him to act in them!!

canonically the eltingville boys did make a horror film together. so i think bill would totally do it

he’d put up a fight and he would be terrible at acting, but he’d still do it.

its the thought that counts!! i guess!!

[greedo3318]

Do Remer x reader where the reader is mad at him so he does crazy romantic gestures to get them to love him again.

IS IT LUCK?

a/n: oh sad pathetic doug remer, you are so dear to me. this is gn but it is mentioned that reader wears jewelery.

cw: a touch suggestive at points but its like. blink and you'll miss it level.

word count: 883

You’re not even quite sure why you’re mad at him; it’s been that long.

You assume it’s over something classically Remer, likely some stupid remark or comment that hit you the wrong way. All you know for certain that he’s been sitting around, moping, giving you puppy dog eyes. He’s been shoving flowers in your hands and making sure to invite you to every single Beers game. Front row tickets, something a lot of people would die for.

He attempts to make a big show of it, blowing you kisses and mouthing stupid things like “This is for you” before completely missing his shot. It throws his game off so badly that he realizes he needs to get a new tactic to win you back over.

And so, he begins plotting, with a little help from Coop. He can’t lose you over something so stupid that you can’t even remember what it was. He may be dumb, but he’s not dumb enough to let your relationship go. 

You huff your way into the house one night, bitching to yourself in your head. There’s another reason to get mad at him, you don’t have your own place. You’re still sharing with Coop, which has led to millions of awkward encounters you don’t even want to think of reliving. You would think with all that baseketball money, Remer would be able to afford a nicer place. You tense your jaw, not bothering to announce your presence.

Despite that, Remer can almost sense your presence and immediately rushes to the door, stumbling over himself to take your jacket off before you can do it yourself. He smiles at you, sweetly, showing off the gap between his teeth.

You furrow your brow, “What’re you up to, Remer?”

“Nothing!” He insists, “But, we’ve got the house to ourselves tonight.” He grins, raising his eyebrows. Great, you think, He’s suggesting makeup sex.

Before you have time to lecture him about this, he’s guiding you into the kitchen and adjacent dining room. You wanna wipe the big grin off his face up until the moment you walk in, your eyes widening. 

Remer has cooked you an entire dinner, and you can smell that he’s baking some kind of dessert too. He had always talked about this, giving you store-bought goods and joking about him cooking them, but you never expected him to actually go through with it. There are lit candles on the table, flowers in vases that you didn’t know you guys owned and a gift bag in front of your chair. There’s the low, low hum of Primus in the background. Your jaw drops, it’s so out of left field but so perfectly Remer.

“Christ, Doug.”

“Don’t call me that.” He shudders, laughing and kissing your cheek, “Sit down, I gotta get those muffins out of the oven before the whole place burns down.”

You know they’re probably just box mix muffins, the kind where you just have to add water, oil and some eggs to get a satisfactory sweet, but the gesture is still there and that’s all that matters to you. You shake your head with a smile, giggling under your breath as Remer burns himself getting them out of the oven.

You sit down, looking down at the table. He’s already made your plate, and the food is so warm it feels like it’s only been out of the oven for fifteen minutes max. He comes over and sits down across from you, moving a vase so he can actually see you.

“How long have you been planning this?” You deadpan, tilting your head.

“A while,” He replies, “Open your stuff!”

“Remer, you didn’t have to,” You say, “I mean the dinner would have sufficed to win me back.”

He scoffs, “Whatever! Just open it!”

You do, and you’re met with a VHS of your favorite movie, some jewelry you had been eyeing for a while, more flowers (you wonder how much money Remer has blown on only flowers in the past couple days), and a handmade card.

Remer has made a little construction paper version of the two of you. It’s a touch crude, but you can tell he obviously put a lot of effort into it. The little version of himself with the poorly drawn curly hair is holding up flowers and saying, “I’M SORRY”. When you open it, you’re met with the words, “I love you. I’m sorry I’m an asshole. XOXO, Remer.” in his messy handwriting.

“I forgive you.” You speak, softly, looking up at him. He grins widely at your words, murmuring “Score!” under his breath, it makes you smile in turn.

Remer’s cooking isn’t actually half bad, and you can tell that he’s definitely going to be in charge of cooking for all three of you in the future. He goes out of his way to spoil you for the rest of the night, going as far as not allowing you to get up to put a VHS in, insisting that’s his job and that “you should just relax”. He cuddles you under the blankets under the couch and you fall asleep to him playing with your hair while whispering stupid shit only you two find funny.

Doug Remer is a good boyfriend, no matter how stupid he is.

[greedo3318]

Sorry if this doesn't make much sense, English isn't my first language. :P

I'm dying for some Bill/Mexican reader content, I'd seriously love a situation where Bill acts all critic-y and the reader (a sexy, spicy Latina girl) totally puts him in his place :)

a/n: don't apologize this makes perfect sense!!

i was very focused on the putting him in his place aspect of this because i literally never write that and like… your mind…

cw: bill is so incredibly gross, fetishization

bill loves to yell at people and call them posers and every other insult under the sun. we know this. you are no exception

obviously the boys yell at him but he doesn’t value josh’s opinions, he thinks pete is fucking stupid, and 99% of the time jerry will just let him get away with anything.

so to have someone who will yell at him, who will genuinely point out flaws in his arguments and won’t let him just stand there and scream at them, especially a girl is fucking insane to him.

even the concept of you telling him “you’re a fucking asshole, bill” instead of just listening to him call you a poser until his face is red is insane

nonetheless you actually putting up a genuine fight.

he hates you so bad (he wants you so bad)

bill is disgusting, all of the boys are, and so i think he fetishizes you on a certain level

its all the gross shit you see incels say online, you know exactly what im talking about, and the moment he says it to pete while youre in range is the moment you slap the shit out of him for the first time

first of many thank god he deserves it

“shut the fuck up, bill. like ANY girl would want your ugly pimply ass anyway.”

getting hit that hard by a girl in front of pete humbles him so bad

i think it is possible to actually literally slap sense into him because of how embarrassing he thinks it is to face punishment for his actions at the hands of a girl

especially a girl who he very clearly has a weird romanticized version of in his head solely because of her ethnicity (DIE BILL DIE)

i genuinely think that you can get teen bill to shut the fuck up if you push him hard enough.

mostly because, again, he thinks its so embarrassing to be yelled at by a girl that he genuinely sometimes cant even bring himself to put up a fight.

if youre not insulted by his screaming of “BITCHCUNTPOSER!!” then what the fuck defense does he have??

none. the answer is none.

if you do somehow start dating after this i can see bill screaming at the other boys if they try to act pervy towards you or say any other weird stuff

you put him in his place, he puts the boys in their place. its a never ending cycle!!

they do find it incredibly strange that someone can successfully lecture bill hard enough to get him to stop being an asshole

but its a very welcome change

bill 100% needs to be put in his place more often. thank GOD you're there.

[greedo3318]

hey! im obsessed w ur bill dickey/reader soo much. im just wondering, do you have any things you absolutely will /not/ write about? i wanna know whats okay and whats not okay to send lol

hi!! tysm i’m glad you enjoyed the fic!!

outside of the the basic stuff like incest or pedophilia or rape/non-con + other stuff along those lines i’m cool with writing just about anything.

if you accidentally request something that i forgot (which would completely be my fault for forgetting😭) i would reply to your ask saying so. thank u for asking!!

[greedo3318]

Couldn't stop kicking my feet reading the Bill req I sent in tysm I think you're very cool and tbh I also like Matt Stone's character Doug Remer I throw on BASEketball all the time

You might get some more reqs in the future

tysm!! i’m glad you enjoyed it :) it was very fun to write. also feel free to request for bill or remer!! it makes me very happy that there actually is some kind of crossover between the two fandoms because i felt like i was the only one 😭

[greedo3318]

Okay this might be a tad specific but

Bill Dickey x Fem!Reader

Perhaps she is also a massive nerd(mostly comics, classic literature, and movies) with a penchant for vintage fashion(more specifically 1970s)? She would be more of the "conventionally attractive" nerd but in an equally unconventional way from the social norm. To nerds, she's the cool girl. To the popular people, she's just as weird as the nerds. The outlier on all sides.

I'm sorry if that's too specific or not specific enough. I didn't want the ask to be super long. It can be headcanons or a one-shot, or whatever you feel comfortable with writing.

a/n: ive been dressing vintage/vintage inspired since like 2020 so this is so near and dear to me thank you anon.

i went w/ headcanons because i had a lot to say about the matter that i could not contain to one fic

cw: bill is mean but that's to be expected.

i’ve always felt like eltingville takes place in the 90s. i know a lotta people think its 2000s but im a 90s eltingville truther to my core. canonically bill’s family isnt that well off, and considering the time period im sure a lot of the stuff his mom gets from the thrift is accidentally 70s/80s.

im not sayin bills goin around in bellbottoms however i am saying that his clothes are just outdated enough to be noticeable (and make him the target of even more bullying)

because of this it actually makes him mad to see you dressing like this willingly. he cannot fathom it and it especially pisses him off when his mom drags him out of the house by the collar and he sees YOU in the thrift store

because bill is a defensive, self centered fuck, he assumes this is another way for a “popular” kid to make fun of him. 

especially if he sees you glance anywhere near any men’s flannels.

he’s too scared to talk to you but is glaring daggers at you the whole time.

when you go to joes to get comics out of the sad little 75 cent box on the ground or to see if he has any dvds is when bill gets pissed enough to talk

“how about you go back to buying your stupid fucking clothes instead of invading my territory and pretending to be into comics for attention?”

you just frown and attempt to ignore him

but he keeps coming. every single time you go to joe’s he’s there and ready to give you shit. no matter how hard you ignore him.

despite it all, unfortunately, bill is mildly infatuated with you. mostly because youre always in the same spaces as him, for better or for worse.

no matter how hard you ignore him he always comes back!! that’s dedication!! kinda!!

when you do talk to him, rarely, and the topic of film or comics is brought up he likes to act like he knows more than you

and is then shocked and angry when he actually doesn’t. especially when it comes to comics.

comics are his thing, how dare you know more than him?? he's the secretary of comic books for fucksake!!!

in the comics when pete blows up on bill and asks if he’s even read interview with a vampire, he goes “i read a little of the comic…” which makes me think that bill does not read in his free time at all. so you’ve got him beat there no matter what which infuriates him to no end.

he hates it so much when you mention a classic book that he’s never heard of in his entire life. it makes him so so mad that he can’t call you a poser and give you impossible trivia.

because you’re sort of stuck in an in between place at a small school in a small town w/ very little friends you also tend to gravitate towards bill

he may be an absolute asshole but at least he talks to you.

even though you guys have a lot of the same interests, especially in comics, he would rather die than let you anywhere near the club.

he actually actively forces the club away from you. because of course he does.

i can see jerry wanting to hang out with you and bill calling him a moron and saying you’re too “popular” for them.

really you being “popular” in bill’s eyes gives him an ego boost. you’re cool and popular and you wanna hang out with HIM? that must mean he’s doing something right.

(he’s not)

that part in the intervention where they’re asking if girls like him and the kids at school make fun of him… him mentioning you to “prove” that cool popular girls at school like him…  :(

he does end up developing a sick weird gross crush on you in true bill fashion.

mostly because you're the only girl who talks to him.

you can tell the moment he starts giving you comics that he thinks you’ll like that hes attempting to “flirt” with you

he likes to tell the club that you’re “into him” even though anytime you guys are close together he’s telling you that he likes comics in a far more deeper and intellectual way than you ever will.

he thinks that’s flirting.

he won’t act on it outside of that though, he’s both too egotistical and too scared

but a girl can dream.

as a bonus for my own personal enjoyment, if bill was brave enough to actually ask you out i can see that stupid fuck HATINGGG classic rock if you play it for him. he’s one of those people who thinks the beatles are overrated. bob dylan’s harmonica solos are on in the background in the car and bill is covering his ears and screaming at you to “turn it the fuck off!"

[greedo3318]

hiii i wanna open requests to motivate myself to write more so here i am.

pls pls pls send requests for …

bill dickey x reader

literally any matt stone character x reader (im partial to remer + him irl but i will literally write anybody but the south park kids)

aaron stampler x reader

narrator (fight club) x reader

i’ll default to fem!reader just out of habit but will do gn!reader if requested & i will literally write anything (angst, fluff, smut… etc etc) as long as you gimme the details <33

i don’t have any of my writing published on here rn but my ao3 user is in my bio for reference on what i usually write🫡