hakseng04

[hakseng04]

Had the usual traumatizing nightmare. I knew that I suddenly woke up crying and then went back to sleep. Dad said I had a nightmare but when I asked about what, he lied about the crying.

I know exactly why, I'm not sure why he lied but I kind of appreciate it. 😔

[hakseng04]

Going to HK but I'm sick af 😔

[hakseng04]

Everyday I wake up questioning my own existence 😔

[hakseng04]

It's been a year since I brought my mom to the hospital..... She never came back. 😔

[hakseng04]

I just want a hug to be honest. I can't remember the last time I was hugged. Was it during my mom's funeral? I'm not sure anymore. My heart feels heavy. 😔

[hakseng04]

Had a good cry. I really needed it 😔

[hakseng04]

I feel like my heart is being ripped apart. I opened my mom's phone today to retrieve all of her social media accounts. My heart fucking hurts. I miss you so much mama 😔

[hakseng04]

Here we go again

[hakseng04]

Whenever my anxiety attacks, I always dream of my mom 😔

[hakseng04]

Kahit sa panaginip gusto ko na mamatay

[hakseng04]

I'm at this point in my life where I question my own sanity. I can't even recognize myself. I just know that I'm not it. Not that person that I used to be. Idk what to do. Idk until when my sanity will hold on. 😞

[hakseng04]

My go to whenever I'm sad and down 😔

[hakseng04]

Happy birthday mama

I spent my morning crying. Last year we didn't even get to celebrate. I love you mama. Kahit gusto kong kunin mo na ako, sana alagaan mo pa ako kasi walang kasama si daddy. Mahal na mahal kita ma. Di ko makalimutan yung time na sinabi mong mahal na mahal mo ako. How I wish I can hear those words again even if you said it in anger.

[hakseng04]

2:41am

Went to take a bath coz I fee sleepy but had a sudden breakdown. I miss my mom so much.

[hakseng04]

Sudden surge

I had this sudden sadness in my heart when I remembered how my brother and mom look like. I wish I have enough money to purchase a customized digital tombstone for them.

[hakseng04]

Every once in a while ...

I would suddenly think of my mom and it's killing me inside because I cannot share my ups and downs to her. I wish I can just talk to her again.

[hakseng04]

Had my first cry of the day. I miss mama