happiest-jade

[happiest-jade]

If it works out that’s fantastic and if it doesn’t it was still a learning experience and nothing is eternally damaging so long as you have the ability to breathe and change course when need be and you shouldn’t compare yourself to anyone else because we are all on entirely different timelines and rejection is redirection and if something doesn’t work out something better can always supplant it and life is too short not to surround it w people who truly love you and you can always find your people no matter what stage of life you’re in and there are too many people in this world for you to settle and nothing that happened in your life is pointless bc it shaped you into exactly who you are today and you can break the cycle whenever you choose to and it’s fine and it’ll work out and you’ll be alright and I love you

[happiest-jade]

But. Fair.

it's so funny to me when i see pearl-clutching articles about how "teenagers are diagnosing themselves with mental disorders via tiktok" because like. this is not happening in a vacuum. teenagers are severely and i mean severely medically neglected. i cannot stress this enough. teenagers do not have free access to medical care. those same news outlets would be clowning on women with housewife psychosis in the 1950's.

i sometimes go pale when listening to some of what my friends have gone through in their childhoods and teenagehoods. they talk about it so nonchalantly, things that would be considered straight up torture if done to an adult, can't fathom the effect this has on children. they are on multiple anti-psychotics and several antidepressants and anxiety meds now that they are adults. medical neglect has legally and effectively disabled them. a timely diagnosis and intervention could have saved them. of course teenagers are self-diagnosing using tiktok. if your knee-jerk reaction is to scoff at the idea and dismiss it as dumb teenager shit instead of being radicalized because the best shot young people have at attaining the mental health support they need is a fucking dancing videos app, you're categorically a political enemy of the youth.

[happiest-jade]

Back to my usual quiet, Bella Swan self now ig.

[happiest-jade]

I don't care about soulmates, I just want him.

If he isn't a soulmate, why does my soul feel like it's breaking?

[happiest-jade]

Nevernevernevernevernevernevernevernevernevernever.

Rip my heart out and turn it into dust.

But I've quite enjoyed feeling now that I have.

[happiest-jade]

I wish begging could change somebody's mind and have them fall irrevocably in love with you.

[happiest-jade]

They say once someone isn't with you romantically, that it's just the person, not the dream. I didn't know I had dreams until I saw him romantically. And they're still crashing down on me. I was always afraid until him.

[happiest-jade]

Reblogging.

and one day, if i’m lucky enough. i will find someone who will actually enjoy my presence and the person i am enough, to choose me. over and over again. just like i will choose them and love them. one day

[happiest-jade]

I don't want to fall out of love, I never want to fall in love ever again. In fact, I never thought I would. Can you deal with this without villainizing someone you love? It's easy to fall in love with people you hate because you can always fall out of love. It's a cop out.

[happiest-jade]

Maybe I should've never loved the original Little Mermaid as a child. Look at me now, I'm turning into sea foam. I've become hauntingly endless too.

[happiest-jade]

I could share my soul with him. But, he could not love me the way I love him. Nobody's fault. I shouldn't be upset, but I am. I wish I'd never fallen in love with someone who's only cruelty is not to be able to to love me.

[happiest-jade]

He's my best friend, but I wish I could puke my romantic feelings out.

[happiest-jade]

It's like my heart was some kind of instrument and it couldn't even sound beautiful.

[happiest-jade]

I really like the word “smitten”. because at first glance you just think of sappy lovey-dovey stuff but also you have to remember this is a word that’s born of the word “smite.” a devastating word. a word that, summarized, means stricken. smitten means stricken as well — struck with devastating affection.

[happiest-jade]

[happiest-jade]

I just got a call back about a job that, I can not stress this enough, I applied to in 2017.

[happiest-jade]