harebrainedmage

[harebrainedmage]

This is actually the best intro to a porno that has ever existed

[harebrainedmage]

Normalize being a silly lil prankster on ANY day.

im not doing anything for april fools

[harebrainedmage]

I hope everyone is having a mice day

[harebrainedmage]

This is what happens every time you evil boop, you sickos

evil and fucked up experiment

[harebrainedmage]

Comparing the rotations of objects in the Solar System. Just look at them lol.✨🪐

To everyone that's confused, the planet Venus rotates very very slowly, with a single revolution taking about 243 Earth days, and Mercury rotates slowly, but not as slow as Venus.

[harebrainedmage]

Sucks that "sleeping together" refers to sex. Sometimes a fella just wants to snooze with a pal.

[harebrainedmage]

This is your friendly reminder that voting as harm reduction is generally a good thing. If it takes you two hours of your time to vote, and that collective action that you and and a bunch of people that did the same thing as you is what makes the difference between your local representative being someone who supports harmful legislation and someone who isn't as bad, congratulations, you've probably saved over two hours of time you would've otherwise spent going to town hall meetings and sending passive aggressive letters asking your rep to please not support whatever dumb thing it is this time.

Yes, the Democrats are not good. Yes, additional political action--direct action, community building, supporting your local library, etc is important.

But saying that voting is pointless doesn't really achieve anything. It's a defeatist position.

If you currently believe that, ask yourself what you're going to do in the time you would've been voting that will make a more positive change. No really, get out a piece of paper and commit to what you're going to do to make your life better instead of voting.

Is it community building, and reaching more people? Educating people on why we need to de-commodify housing, or establish universal health care? Advocating for radical bodily autonomy?

Consider for a moment, perhaps, that even if you have soured on voting entirely, that perhaps this could be a chance for you to get there early, get your little "I Voted" sticker, and then stand outside with some literature you printed in advance, ready to win over some people who are receptive to it.

Even if you live in a district that's 75% red, if you think you won't be at risk of physical harm, go. Do it.

You'll be able to do a lot of networking with the other 25%. And a fair bit of them likely aren't satisfied with the Democrats either.

I don’t even care who fucking wins the presidency this year look at this

[harebrainedmage]

If you’ve ever wondered how reposting hurts artists- yesterday I found a post from 2012ish featuring one of my Sherlock/Doctor Who pieces. That post had 17,604 notes. It wasn’t my post. My post of that art had 0 notes.

Apparently I saw the post once when it was at 6k because an artist I admired reblogged it, but at that stage I was very unwell & not experienced enough with Tumblr to realise what effect it might have.

Looking through the notes now I see that in the six years since then-

Several people got the design as a tattoo.

A number liked it enough to want custom designs but didn’t know how to contact me so that’s approximately £300 I didn’t get a chance to earn.

Someone used that art in the front cover of a comic by accident and while the company fixed it after I contacted them that’s exposure that it’s far too late to capitalise on now.

If you like an artwork that you find off tumblr, please, please I am begging you search for the artist’s name and see if they do actually have a Tumblr you could reblogged from instead. If you’re an artist search your username(s) every so often to see if your work has been taken.

A few hundred quid might not seem like a lot, but that’s a few months of income for me

[harebrainedmage]

Reblog if you think asexuality is a legitimate sexuality.

I'm trying to prove something.

[harebrainedmage]

Tumblr’s Core Prodct Stratgy

Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on trying to keep our sinking ship afloat for as long as possible. This means desperately trying to copy every new fly-by-night social media app that some multi-billionaire sh*t out during their daily Peloton routine. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. If you find the things we say here worrisome, please understand that is our exact intention. You've outgrown our target demographic. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

The Diagnosis

It's lookin' pretty bad y'all!

After somehow losing hundreds of thousands of users during the great pr0n purge of 2018, we started to wonder if anything could be done to get back to where we were. We even brought in a management consultant who charged us a ridiculous amount of money. It would make you sick if you knew how much, but we got a few nice meals out of it at least. Anyhow, we handed this guy the app, and HE HAD NO IDEA HOW TO USE IT! It was f*cking hilarious! But suddenly it all clicked -- our users are a bunch of stupid idiots who can't even do basic arithmetic. I mean, they spend all day looking at their phones, so what do you expect?

Tumblr’s best feature is its unique content and vibrant communities. But who cares, right? We're just as happy getting traffic from people sh*t-posting memes, vague-booking, giving out-of-context hot takes to news events, and spewing whatever random thought is in their head at the moment. Plus that stuff doesn't p*ss off Apple.

To keep this thing going we need new people. And by "people" we mean teenagers, like we used to have back in the good ol' days. Unfortunately we're all in our 40s now, so we have no idea what they want. But teenagers are so cool! Imagine if they talked to us like we're one of them? We're getting hard just thinking about it.

Our Guidng Principls

To make Tumblr cool again, we must address these huge glaring issues.

People can look at a blog without logging in. How is that fair to all the poor schlubs who had to fill out forms to get an account? Also we haven't figured out a way to force ads onto the personalized pages yet. But we swear that's not the main reason.

People can see content they are looking for or linked to. People can keep up with blogs they follow. But the problem with this is, people don't know what they want. We know what they want! We're smart. We wrote this damn site, remember?

Promote posts that incite pointless conversations. Posts that are guaranteed to bait every troll into responding. Isn't that why all your Magat relatives love Facebook so much? We can do that!

P*ss off your content creators in every way possible (see #2).

Create algorithms that throw an unending barrage of irrelevant content in your face. Have you seen Instagram lately? We could do that so easy!!!

The app is slow. The website is slow. Obviously this is because of GIFs. Facebook and Instagram don't allow them, so why should we?

Conclusion

Our mission changes on a day-to-day basis. Right now we're super jealous of all the attention that new Threads thing is getting. We're still not sure what it is, but we're gonna download it after work.

[harebrainedmage]

the Elongated square gyrobicupola! gotta be one of my favorite genders

[harebrainedmage]

Infighting only helps our oppressors.

Infighting only helps our oppressors.

Infighting only helps our oppressors.

Infighting only helps our oppressors.

Infighting only helps our oppressors.

[harebrainedmage]

For some reason, the people that tell me "Be the change you want to see in the world" get really, really upset whenever I send them stuff like this after they say that.

Sorry for the bad photo quality, Tumblr doesn't like posts this long.

[harebrainedmage]

I was talking to a friend earlier and she asked me about in what way I mean it when I say I'm a cat and (because I'm the worst) I deadass said "okay so look, Hegel says that" and yknow maybe my brain is starting to actually work again because I'm becoming once again utterly insufferable

[harebrainedmage]

ct. you know many thimgs. can you teach me what a "prostate orgasm" is & how to get one

So back in the middle ages, many magicians felt that the world was primarily ruled astrologically. The planets, the moon and the sun, and signs of the zodiac, were all a sort of heavenly language that God used to administer the world.

The evidence for this was the similarities of things. The sign of cancer looked like a crab, therefore it ruled over crabs, and all things like crabs. So the sign of cancer was connected in some way to any thing reclusive, hard-shelled, furtive, and self-reliant. This idea, that the star signs and planets are connected to qualities on earth, is known as "The Doctrine of Signatures."

This extends to the body! Check out this image from De Occulta Philosophia, in which Agrippa shows which star signs rule over which elements of the body.

(yes that diagram on the left is what horoscope charts used to look like.)

This diagram is from the 1500s. Take note of the planetary associations on the left here. The core of the body is associated with the sun, but the genitals, the genitals are lunar. (Because they ebb and flow like the tides as they get excited.)

Humorously, but also as significant magical commentary, Alieststair Crowley would extend this conception of the Magical Solar Internal Core of the body to the idea that the butthole was therefore also solar in nature. This was both simply a logical extension of Agrippas magical theories, and a clever jab at traditional religious institutions. (The Christian god is often considered astrally solar in nature.)

He combined this with alchemical doctrine --in which the uniting of the sun and moon is popular imagery-- and came to the conclusion that penis-in-butthole sex was one of the most magically potent things a person could do.

[harebrainedmage]

Plenty of highly intelligent people end up getting sucked in to cults because they just wanted people to hang out with. There are antivaxxer nurses. Your ability to act on empirical reason breaks down fast if your social and emotional needs aren't being met.

[harebrainedmage]

If you think that fanfiction, in general, is worse than published books, you have not seen the dark depths of published works out there; go read The Celestine Prophecy if you don't believe me. You can pick a random fic on AO3 of about the same length after the fact and I can almost guarantee it'll probably be better constructed.

Also, writing tip: If you feel bad about your writing, go read The Celestine Prophecy. You might not ever crank out a Cloud Atlas or anything, but I believe that you, random Tumblr reader (or cropped Tumblr screenshot enjoyer) can do better than James Redfield did

Can fandom/fanfic (both as a literal thing and also as a way of understanding media as having a "canon" separate from other content) exist in a world post-IP law abolishment?

i don't think so and good riddance!