heilanlecoq

[heilanlecoq]

“✿” (Sunny)

Warning: I've got a bad case of 'I want you.' Lets meet up tonight and let's see if we can cure it?

[heilanlecoq]

🖤

[heilanlecoq]

"You make it sound like I'm a priest having to forgive your sins," Heilan teased, a breathless laugh escaping him, though he thoroughly enjoyed the hungry, almost desperate, press of Sunny's lips against his. A flush spread across his cheeks, not from embarrassment, but from the sheer, overwhelming sensation. Did he have experience in this? Absolutely not. Heilan had never truly dated anyone until now, had never navigated the intricate dance of intimacy beyond the realm of shared childhood secrets and comfortable silences. Sure, he'd known he was gay a long, long time ago, since the confusing, exhilarating pangs of attraction first began to stir in his adolescent heart, a quiet, undeniable truth that set him apart. But no one, not a single soul he'd ever encountered, had come close to Sunny. No one had ever ignited this deep, undeniable ache within him, this potent blend of tenderness and fierce desire. Sunny wasn't just a first love; he was the first love, the singular, incandescent benchmark against which all future connections would, inevitably, fall short. Every brush of skin, every lingering glance, every hesitant touch, every raw, searching kiss, every shift in Sunny's body against his, was a revelation, a profound, urgent lesson learned in the unspoken language of desire. He was an eager student, hungry for every nuance.

His breath hitched, a sharp, involuntary gasp that tore through his chest, as he felt his shirt being tugged and loosened, the soft fabric giving way to the cool air, and then, the sudden, searing contact of Sunny’s fingers on his bare skin. It was enough to send him ablaze, a wildfire roaring through his veins, making his entire body hum and thrum with a frantic, exhilarating energy. His skin felt electrified, every pore tingling, every hair on end. He didn't want to become a whiny, needy mess; he really, truly didn't. He prided himself on his composure, on being the steady, unwavering one, the rock. But Sunny just had that effect on him, unraveling his carefully constructed control with an effortless touch, reducing him to a molten, longing puddle, a quivering heap of raw nerves and desperate need. Every nerve ending screamed, a chorus of silent demands, every muscle tensed with a delicious agony that bordered on unbearable pleasure. The world narrowed to just them, just this moment, a singular point of intense focus: the intoxicating scent of Sunny’s skin, the sweet, intoxicating taste of his mouth, the insistent, almost demanding, feeling of his hands igniting a primal need within him, a craving that bypassed all logic, all reason, leaving only instinct.

Please, Sunny… faster, his mind pleaded, a desperate, silent mantra echoing in the throbbing rhythm of his pulse. I need you, now. I need this. All of it.

.

Normally, if someone where to tell him to close his eyes, Sunny wouldn't dare close them all the way. That was a sure fire way to get yourself fucked over in a lot of circumstances. But he knew this was different. This was Heilan. He wasn't going to hurt him, or play any tricks. And so, despite his breath hitching and his nerves running rampant, he nodded his head, and closed his eyes. There were too many thoughts in his head, and everything was making him feel dizzy, but when he closed his eyes, thought feelings started to subside, and he could finally focus on the both of them in that moment.

Heilan's hands felt so familiar, comforting, and it was in that moment that Sunny realized he'd never want to hold anyone else's, or seek out any other for comfort. He wanted him. There wasn't another soul on this earth that could make him feel safe the way that he did. Truthfully, Sunny should have anticipated this next move, but he was too busy trying to plan out what to say next. That was always one of his fatal flaws; rushing to get to the next stop, without really enjoying the one along the way.

Sunny felt his cheeks instantly grow hot, but he hardly cared. This was a feeling he'd been craving since a few weeks ago when it first happened; the first time that his eyes had suddenly opened to this, the two of them, as a possibility. Why hadn't he considered it before? Surely there were times where he must have.... but as he tried to think back, the memories of the past were being replaced by ones of a potential future. Suddenly that conversation about riding elephants and having stories to tell their grandchildren became somewhat more of a possibility, only they may very well end up telling the same people. No, that was too far too fast... wasn't it? He was letting himself get too far ahead... again, always rushing. Dammit....

No, he would force himself to slow down if it killed him. At least, enough to enjoy what was happening this very moment, and not waste another second, or another breath trying to deny what his heart had been attempting to tell him all along. He was a smart man when it came to logical and business decisions, but matters of the heart always took a little longer to figure out. Maybe that was directly related to the fact that he'd lost the one person he cared for most at such a young age. Don't dread on the past, he reminded himself as he suddenly felt his mind surge back into the present, kissing Heilan back with a newfound confidence and passion.

When they pulled apart, Sunny felt this etherealness in the air wash over him, giving him both comfort and a sense of lust. "What? No- no, I just meant— I had always thought... but now...." Then it fully hit him what Heilan had said. I really really want you right now. Shit. "Fuck it," he mumbled, grabbing the man by the cheeks and pulling him closer into a kiss that said a hundred words with none at all. He wasn't great at expressing himself, and he knew that he needed to work on that, but he was desperately hoping Heilan could forgive him if just this time he didn't use many words at all. After all, didn't actions speak louder?

Even when he pulled away to catch his breath, Sunny didn't dare let him go far, keeping their lips within an inch of each other. "You'll have to forgive me if I don't exactly know what I'm doing.... I'm sorry for that in advance," he apologized, kissing the man once again. Though he didn't exactly have loads of experience, he knew that he wanted him in the same way, and that they would figure this out together.

As their lips connected and explored one another's, Sunny kept a hand placed gently on his cheek, and moved the other down to his waist, beginning to untuck his shirt from his pants. He did everything calmly, as to not rush but also perhaps seeking a bit of guidance and/or encouragement. Once he got the mans shirt untucked enough, he slid his hand under the fabric, his fingers delicately touching the other's skin.

[heilanlecoq]

Of course, Heilan didn't take it personally. How could he? He was acutely aware that he was the catalyst, the one who had shattered the delicate equilibrium between them by the impulsive act of kissing the one person who had ever truly felt like home. Sunny was the one who effortlessly drew laughter from him, the one who accepted him in his entirety, flaws and all. This was someone he would protect with every fiber of his being, cherish relentlessly, and, as now, forgive no matter the stumble. Though, a hopeful, selfish part of him still yearned for that forgiveness to occasionally include a kiss, now and again.

Heilan knew, with an almost weary certainty, that Sunny wouldn't just let him wave it off with a simple "it's fine." Sunny, with his honest heart, would insist on laying bare his own side of the story, needing to process and articulate his feelings. And while Sunny might wish desperately that things had unfolded differently, Heilan, surprisingly, was more than content with the way their paths had intertwined. He held a quiet, steadfast faith that, despite the current turbulence, everything would, indeed, be alright in the end. He just needed to be there, present and unwavering.

"Yes, I'll listen," Heilan promised, his voice soft but firm, cutting through the rising anxiety in the air. He could almost feel his friend teetering on the brink of a spiral, a familiar pattern of self-doubt and overthinking. All Heilan truly wanted was to pull Sunny into his arms and kiss him again, to banish the uncertainty from those beautiful eyes. So, he listened, every atom of his being attuned to Sunny's words, awaiting the unspoken signal, waiting for Sunny to finally admit that he returned the affection. Because a profound, undeniable part of him had felt Sunny return the kiss, however fleeting, however panicked Sunny had been afterwards. It was real. Vulnerable, yes, but undeniably real.

Then came the word: "asexual."

Heilan's world tilted. A sudden, cold lump formed in his throat, heavy and suffocating. Had he misread everything so catastrophically? Had every stolen glance, every shared laugh, every tender moment been filtered through a lens of his own desperate hope? A wave of crushing despair threatened to pull him under, the carefully constructed faith he held moments before crumbling around him. But then, almost miraculously, came the word that pulled him back from the precipice: "but." And it felt like, in that split second, Heilan took his first real breath since Sunny had begun to speak, the air rushing back into his lungs, cool and life-giving.

"Close your eyes," Heilan urged, his voice thick with a raw, desperate tenderness, urgency bleeding into every syllable. He reached out, his hands finding Sunny's, wrapping around them, anchoring them both. With a gentle, deliberate motion, he began to stroke Sunny's palm with his thumbs, a silent, comforting rhythm. "You will never lose me, ever. I love you too much to ever give you up."

And then, he kissed him.

It was a kiss that tasted of memory, of unspoken histories and burgeoning futures. In that single, consuming moment, Heilan remembered everything they had ever shared: the dizzying freedom of swinging on the ancient tire swing in his childhood treehouse, the cool, silken glide of lake water during their endless summer swims behind his parents' house, the hushed comfort of snuggling close as they spun fantastical tales and buried imaginary treasures beneath the weeping willow. He recalled the more awkward, yet undeniably formative, moments too – the confused, surging heat of adolescence when his friend, suddenly, inexplicably, turned undeniably attractive that one summer twenty-five years ago, the surprising, exhilarating press of Sunny's lips at James’s chaotic wedding party just weeks ago.

Everything, every single thread of their lives, wove together, converging into this singular, breathtaking moment.

Heilan pulled back just enough to graze Sunny's lips with his own, his voice a low, husky whisper that barely broke the silence. "Are you sure you're asexual, because I really, really want you right now." He punctuated the question with a gentle bite on Sunny's lip, deepening the kiss, a silent plea wrapped in passion.

Sunny already knew that Heilan was going to try and say it was fine, that he didn't take it personally, or however he was going to put it, because he knew the man better than anyone. Somehow, someway, maybe because he was too nice, Heilan would likely try and flip the situation so that he was apologizing. So when the words it's okay came out of his friends mouth, Sunny immediately shook his head and held up a hand. "No, it's not okay, it was shitty and I shouldn't have done it. I should have just asked to talk to you in private, or done... literally anything else, and I can't take that back, but I wish I could," he spat out, a bit rushed and panicked.

"I just— please, I just need you to listen to me, okay?" Sunny asked, finally meeting the man's gaze with intention and purpose. "Give me a chance to explain myself. Just one. And if you can't accept my apology, then I'll understand, but I need you to know how I'm feeling." He took the man's hand and pulled him to sit. This was terrifying. He hadn't even begun to start his explanation and already he could feel his chest begin to tighten. He needed to do this. For himself, and more importantly, because Heilan deserved to know the truth, even if it was too much.

"In my entire life," he started, trying to maintain eye contact but knowing that at some point he would likely break it. "I hadn't cared about anyone romantically. Never. It hadn't even crossed my mind. For years, whenever anyone asked why I wasn't dating anyone, I would make excuses after excuses because I didn't feel like I should have to explain myself. I started saying that I wasn't dating anyone because most women wanted children, or long term commitment, and I didn't, or wasn't ready, or— whatever the fucking reason, there were so many, I can't remember them all," he explained, shaking his head to get back on track. "I thought something must be wrong with me, because I didn't care. I never cared, and so I never bothered to ask myself any of those questions. Never did I ever even think that... well," he paused, a moment of silence lingering in the air. "Let's just say I never considered my options."

His eyes had moved away now, looking all over the room as he tried to regather his thoughts. "Anyway... any dates I'd ever gone on, if you could even count them as that, were strictly platonic, or business ploys, I never had any intention of ever being with someone romantically, or—" Sexually... The word wouldn't force itself out, as hard as he tried, so he would just have to hope that Heilan understood what he was trying to get across. He swallowed the lump in his throat, and attempted to keep going. "I just sort of accepted that I wouldn't ever date. It didn't interest me, I didn't see a point in it. I've never found anyone... appealing, in that way."

Fuck... this wasn't working. He wasn't getting his point across the way he wanted to, and he was starting to panic. The overwhelming desire to bolt again was starting to rise up. He needed to push it down, desperately. He could do this. He had to. Heilan deserved that much. "I had friends and family, constantly trying to set me up with women, and I just... I knew, that I would never be interested, and so I just assumed that I was... I dunno... I guess I assumed that I was asexual," he explained, trying his best to understand what all of this meant to him.

"But you," Sunny began, trying his best to choose his words carefully. "You, have been the only person I ever saw and said to myself, I need this person in my life. In any way I can have them. And that scared the shit out of me," he confessed, taking a deep breath. "So... I did everything I could to make sure I didn't lose you, and unfortunately, that meant suppressing any and all feelings that could have ever been, before they happened. And... when you kissed me," he paused, wringing his hands together anxiously. "It made me realize that I fucked up, royally, in more than one way, and I just— panicked. You have every right to be mad at me, to call me a chicken, or whatever you need to say. I can take it, any and all of it, but before you say anything, please, just—" Sunny looked up once more, finally meeting the man's gaze again. "Tell me that I'm not going to lose you, forever... because I couldn't handle that."

[heilanlecoq]

The moment Heilan's eyes locked onto Sunny's, a jolt of something akin to electric current shot through him, bypassing all reason and settling deep in his chest. He couldn't help but think, with a raw, undeniable urgency, that he wanted to kiss him again. Every fiber of his being screamed for a repeat of that unexpected, earth-shattering moment. Of course, he should feel a crushing wave of regret, a tidal pull towards shame for the audacity of that impulsive kiss at his friend's wedding, especially after he'd been abandoned by Sunny. But in some twisted, disorienting way, his brain was no longer processing regret; it was a broken record, chanting one insistent, dangerous command: KISS HIM AGAIN!

Heilan's palms were suddenly slick with sweat, his breath catching in his throat. He couldn't—or, more accurately, he shouldn't—give into these overwhelming desires, not when Sunny stood before him, shoulders slightly slumped, his voice soft with a genuine apology for leaving him high and dry. The tension in the air was palpable, thick enough to choke on. It didn't feel like a sufficient response, merely standing there, absorbing Sunny's words while his own body betrayed him. Nervously, almost instinctively, Heilan began shifting from foot to foot, a subtle, desperate dance designed solely to stop himself from doing something incredibly foolish, something that would undoubtedly complicate everything even further. He envisioned himself launching forward, closing the scant distance between them, and kissing Sunny senseless, devouring any lingering doubt or apology with his lips.

"It's okay—" he managed to croak out instead, the words feeling utterly inadequate, a thin veil over the chaotic storm brewing within him. He tried his absolute best to focus, to truly see Sunny, to interpret every nuance of his expression, every inflection in his voice, desperate to receive the message that would define their immediate future. Would it be an acceptance, a reciprocal understanding of the spark that had ignited between them? Or would it be a crushing rejection, a definitive end to any nascent hope? He knew, with a gut-wrenching certainty, that he absolutely couldn't kiss Sunny if the answer was rejection. The thought alone was a cold dread tightening around his heart. So, with every ounce of his being, he really, really hoped it was an acceptance.

There was an unexplainable relief that came washing over him when he read the message back. But now, reality was setting in that this was happening, and quickly. He hadn't even gotten all of his thoughts and feelings down on paper yet, not wanting to forget anything. Speaking from the heart wasn't always his strong suit, but dammit all, he was going to try his hardest. Heilan deserved that much of him, after all. He grabbed some scratch paper that he had laying around, scribbling down questions he had, answers to questions that he was sure Heilan likely had —at least, the best answers he could come up with in the moment— feelings he was having... anything that came to mind, honestly. He would have to flush them out in actual conversation, but this would do for now.

Time was a funny thing. From the moment he had received the response message to the timing of the doorbell felt like seconds. He wasn't sure how long it actually was, but the efficiency should not have surprised him. "Hang on just a moment!" He shouted, trying to make sure both he and his home looked at least somewhat presentable. Was there time to change his shirt? Comb his hair? Screw it, he didn't want to leave his friend standing there, waiting.

As calmly as he could, he walked over to the door and opened it, trying to ignore the craziness of his heartbeat, so quick that it felt like it was going to leap out of his chest and right onto the ground at Heilan's feet. "Hi," he greeted the man, almost coyly. "Come in." There was this hesitation in the air now, one that he was unfamiliar with around his closest friend. They had always been so open and honest with one another, but now it all felt strangely intimate. Like there was this pressure to answer and define things, when Sunny wasn't even one hundred percent sure how he felt about it.

How exactly were you supposed to describe the feeling when you couldn't stop perseverating over something so deeply that it ached to think about, and yet you didn't want to stop until you understood its meaning? All he knew was that when he left the wedding, he couldn't get the feeling of Heilan's lips on his out of his mind, and for the rest of the night, had found himself periodically touching them, as if searching for that feeling again.

Sunny sat down on the couch, and gestured for Heilan to join, across from him so they could talk face to face. This was it. After a pause and a deep breath, Sunny spoke first. "First of all, I'm sorry... I didn't mean to leave you there by yourself... and I know that must have been confusing, and saddening, so... I apologize."

[heilanlecoq]

Heilan's entire world, which had felt adrift since the ballroom, snapped into sharp focus when his comm device hummed, displaying Sunny's name. His heart didn't just leap; it performed a dizzying, acrobatic somersault in his chest, a frantic beat that momentarily stole his breath. He hadn't dared to hope for contact so soon, or frankly, for contact at all, after the bewildering, charged moment on the dancefloor. A tidal wave of surprise crashed against him, immediately followed by an almost painful surge of anxious excitement. This was it. He knew, with a certainty that settled deep in his bones and hummed through his veins, that this was his chance – his singular opportunity to mend the unspoken rift and confront the swirling uncertainty that had plagued him.

He was utterly, fiercely determined to make things right between them, to bridge the awkward, aching chasm that had opened up. Whatever questions Sunny had – and he suspected there would be more than just a couple, probably a relentless volley, each one dissecting that impulsive, yet undeniably electric, kiss – Heilan was ready. He’d face them head-on, answer every one truthfully, even if it meant laying bare the chaotic, yearning tangle of feelings he hadn’t fully understood himself until now. He was prepared to be vulnerable, to expose the raw emotion that had driven his actions.

His fingers, suddenly clumsy and trembling, hovered over the keyboard. He wanted to articulate everything that tumbled through his mind: the profound connection he’d felt, the longing that had driven him across that impossible line, the quiet ache that had settled in after Sunny vanished. A whirlwind of apologies, confessions, and desperate hopes raced through his thoughts, vying for dominance, but no coherent words would form. His usual eloquence abandoned him completely. Finally, with a deep, shuddering breath that did little to calm the rapidly multiplying butterflies erupting in his stomach, he managed to tap out a short, painfully simple message. "I'm on my way."

It was all he could manage, a succinct declaration that, despite its brevity, spoke volumes. It conveyed his eagerness, his sheer, undeniable desire to see him, to explain, to understand. Every fiber of his being yearned for the chance to unravel the confusion, to confront the unspoken, and perhaps, just perhaps, to rekindle the spark that had, for one breathtaking second, promised something extraordinary. The silence that followed his sent message stretched, filled only with the frantic rhythm of his own heart, echoing the profound hope that now dared to take root.

And with that he rang the doorbell, disheveled from rushing to Sunny's home.

Sunny felt ashamed of how he had reacted at the wedding. It was a rash decision made in the heat of the moment, driven by an unshakeable fear of what this now meant. Did it mean that both harbored feelings for one another? Was the first kiss an accidental mishap from how close they'd been? What if he'd just made a huge mistake, and none of this meant anything at all?

He had spent the entire rest of the evening trying to figure it out; sifting through theory after theory, scenario after scenario, like a critic trying to decipher the meaning behind the authors words. All of it felt so ambiguous. And still... the weight of the decision he had made was sitting heavy on his chest, especially since he hadn't spoken to the man since. But it was time. No more hiding, or making excuses. He just needed to face the issue, head on.

Quickly, he took out his phone, typing message after message, deleting them before hitting send each time, not knowing what to say. Nothing felt right. He wasn't going to apologize over text message, of course, because that felt insincere, and they couldn't fully express their feelings over a phone screen. Yet he had no idea what to say. Eventually, he landed on

Come over

Everything else felt too dramatic, too serious. He didn't want to scare Heilan, or worry him, but he wanted the other to know that he was ready to see him. No, that he wanted to see him. He felt like the message was direct enough to convey that, though he supposed he would know when the other got there. If he came at all. God he hoped he did... all he could do was wait.

@heilanlecoq

[heilanlecoq]

The vibrant energy of the dancefloor , moments ago a symphony of shared motion and unspoken yearning, now felt like a jarring cacophony around Heilan. He stood rooted to the spot, his gaze fixed on the retreating figure of Sunny, swallowed by the swirling mass of dancing bodies and chattering guests. A profound ache settled in his chest, a sensation akin to being a kicked puppy – bewildered, a little hurt, and utterly abandoned in the sudden emptiness Sunny's absence left behind. The brief, intoxicating brush of their lips replayed in his mind, a phantom warmth that lingered long after the physical contact had ceased.

And yet, despite the sting of the sudden separation, a tiny, stubborn ember of hope flickered to life within him. He kissed me back, Heilan's mind insisted, a desperate, silent mantra. It wasn't just me. He responded. It was brief, yes, barely a breath, but it had been there, a fleeting acknowledgment of the spark that had ignited between them. That small, undeniable reciprocation was the lifeline he clung to, the fragile promise of a positive outcome, or at least, that's what he desperately wanted to believe. He needed to believe it, to justify the reckless impulse that had seized him, the sudden, overwhelming desire to bridge the gap between friendship and something far more profound.

With a conscious effort, Heilan forced a polite, almost practiced smile onto his face. He turned slowly, his eyes scanning the faces of the other revelers, a few of whom seemed to glance his way with fleeting curiosity. He offered a slight nod to a passing couple, feigning an ease he was far from feeling. The music still swelled, the chandeliers still glittered, but the magic of the moment had utterly evaporated, leaving him feeling starkly, acutely alone amidst the joyous throng. The air suddenly felt too thick, the laughter too loud, the very act of existing in this space without Sunny beside him, unbearable.

He knew he couldn't stay, not like this. The thought of lingering, of having to explain himself or face any lingering questions, was unbearable. With a final, lingering glance towards the spot where Sunny had vanished, a silent plea for understanding hanging in the air, Heilan decided it was time to leave. He navigated through the thinning crowd, his movements stiff, his mind replaying the kiss, the dip, the sudden, exhilarating terror of his own actions. He slipped quietly out of the grand hall, the sounds of the celebration fading behind him like a distant dream. The cool night air was a welcome shock against his flushed cheeks, a tangible anchor in the swirling chaos of his thoughts.

As he walked towards home, the familiar crunch of gravel under his boots a grounding rhythm, his thoughts turned to James. James, his loyal friend, his steadfast confidant. Heilan knew, with a certainty that settled deep in his bones, that James would understand. He trusted him that much, trusted him to listen without judgment, to offer a quiet strength, and perhaps, just perhaps, to help him make sense of the dizzying, terrifying, hopeful leap he had just taken. That trust was a comforting thought, a small beacon in the overwhelming uncertainty of his heart.

the end

This felt like a dream. A surreal, ethereal dream that he could have only imagined. No, he had never imagined anything like this, never allowed himself to. The sort of life he'd chosen... it didn't typical amount to things like this. But with Heilan... anything felt possible. He was at a wedding, with his best friend, and was dancing. That wasn't something anyone could have gotten him to do before, let alone enjoy. Whatever magic was in the air that night, it was hypnotic. And for once, Sunny didn't mind.

No one could have distracted him in a room full of people, before this. He had been struggling to understand just what that might have meant, but tonight, things were starting to become a little clearer. Slowly, little by little, things were unraveling; pieces of the puzzle that once looked identical were becoming visible each in their own right. With every step they took, it was becoming increasingly difficult to ignore these feelings any longer; did he really harbor feelings for his best friend? No... he couldn't... but then again...

The laugh that left his lips as they danced was genuine, and he found himself having a good time. Perhaps the best he'd had in a long while. It was confusing but addicting, and a selfish part of him didn't want tonight to end. Before now, Sunny had only ever thought with his head, but tonight was different. Everything in his gut was telling him to think with his emotions, and just when he was beginning to put those feelings into thoughts...

Their lips met.

Shit. Too many emotions and thoughts were rushing through his head now, making this more confusing than ever. His own sexuality had already been a confusing nightmare that he had been trying to navigate for years, and now he had to deal with the abrupt reality that Heilan might actually feel the same way, whatever way he was feeling. Neither of them had ever spoken about their sexualities to one another before, so it was a shock now to feel so vulnerable. To suddenly have to confront whatever strange pining this felt like. There were too many variables. And it all came screaming to a halt when Sunny acted without thinking. He grabbed the man's face and kissed him.

It was quick. Nothing longer than a second or two, but it was enough to make him panic. He had just returned a gesture that he wasn't one hundred percent confident was even intentional, and now his mind was doing the thing it did best, aside from business. It was spiraling. Sabotaging any chance of talking this out here and now. No, he couldn't. "I um... I have to go... I'm sorry," he said rather quickly, pulling away from him and disappearing into the crowd. It was shitty. He knew that. But there were things that he couldn't jeopardize and he needed to think.

[heilanlecoq]

The grand ballroom shimmered under the soft glow of chandeliers, the air thick with the scent of old wood and hushed conversations. Amidst the gentle swirl of couples, Heilan and Sunny glided effortlessly, lost in the slow, sweeping rhythm of the waltz. It was as if the music itself had wrapped around them, drawing them into a cocoon of shared motion. If Heilan dared to acknowledge the tumultuous feelings swirling within him, he’d admit it was a potent cocktail: a searing arousal that hummed just beneath his skin, pulling him closer, yet interwoven with an overwhelming sense of home. Sunny, in this moment and always, felt like the most familiar and comforting place he knew.

He cleared his throat, a nervous habit, but his grip on Sunny's hand remained firm as he continued to lead. His gaze was fixed solely on Sunny's face, oblivious to the other dancers, the judging eyes, the whispered gossip that might follow two men dancing so intimately. He didn't care; not one single, solitary bit. Their world had shrunk to the space between them, to the gentle sway of their bodies and the silent conversation their movements held.

A warm smile touched Heilan's lips as he twirled Sunny, the fabric of their clothes brushing with a soft whisper. In the intoxicating magic of the moment, a spontaneous impulse took over. He dipped Sunny low, their faces drawing impossibly close. And then, as if by an ancient, undeniable gravitational pull, his lips brushed Sunny's—a feather-light touch that lasted for only a fleeting second. It was all he allowed himself, a mere whisper of contact, barely there, yet echoing with an unspoken truth.

Heilan blinked, the soft focus of the ballroom snapping back into sharp, horrifying clarity. What had he done? Had he truly just kissed his best friend? The music seemed to fade, replaced by the frantic pounding of his own heart.

"Sunny—" he began, the single word caught in his throat, utterly lost for anything more to say. The air crackled with a sudden, unbearable tension, shattering the peaceful rhythm they had just shared.

“Oh— no, I don’t—” Before Sunny could finish the phrase that he didn’t know how to dance, he was being whisked away once again. It wasn’t that he was afraid to dance with him, but he genuinely had little to no idea what he was doing. Dancing was a skill that he unfortunately had never been taught, and it wasn’t like he was blessed by the rhythm gods in that department either. Though despite all of his hesitations, the hopeful and eager expression that the other man was giving him made him cave. How was he supposed to say no to that?

Of course, the music had to change to a rather slow song. This could work to his advantage, though, seeing as how all they had to do was sway a bit back and forth. Right? It wasn’t like this was a ballroom and they needed to partake in formal dances. If that had been the case he might have reconsidered. But this, well… he could deal with a few minutes of dancing if it meant making the other happy.

Sunny had virtually no idea what to do, nor where to put his hands. This was all a foreign concept to him that he was attempting to learn. After a quick glance around at what other people were doing, he brought his gaze back to Heilan, not wanting the man to think he was opposed to being here in this moment. Then he felt the mans hand on his back, and it sent a silent but prominent shiver down his spine. Normally, this level of intimacy from anyone would have had him running for the hills. Talking about feelings was something his family had never done; hell, he was still carrying the family trauma on his back like the world depended on it. Everything in his mind was telling him to run, but his heart… his heart was begging;

Stay.

Awkwardly, his hands found their positioning, and he tried his best not to let it show how nervous he was. “It might be best if you took that on,” Sunny answered, a bit nervously. There was a lump in his throat that wouldn’t quite go down, and he was nearly positive Heilan could tell his heart was racing beyond any normal rate. But he was determined to stay here, present in the moment. If he allowed him to lead, he would be alright. “Actually I think I would have to insist that you do,” Sunny chuckled, warming up to the idea.

[heilanlecoq]

-the end

continue from here @sir-scamsalot

Heilan grinned, a wide, enthusiastic smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes, a genuine expression of delight. Oh, he would definitely ask his students to aid him in this grand design adventure! He could already picture their excited faces, their whispered plans, and the inevitable, brilliantly chaotic brainstorming sessions. Who knew what those little troublemakers would come up with, especially when faced with a cause as wonderfully whimsical and inherently inspiring as the Hiding Dodo? Their unbridled creativity, their fearless approach to the seemingly impossible, their uncanny ability to turn any challenge into an exhilarating game — it was exactly what this project needed to truly soar. He tilted his head slightly, a playful yet gentle gesture, at Sunny's somewhat tentative remark. A soft, almost paternal concern flickered in his eyes, a momentary thought that perhaps Sunny genuinely wasn't aware of the depth of their friendship. "I have always time for you, my friend," he said, his voice dropping to a warm, reassuring tone, as if stating the most obvious truth in the world. "Always. Well, I'm looking quite forward to this sparkly adventure of the search for the dodo. I swear, you have the brightest of ideas sometimes!" He clapped Sunny lightly on the shoulder, a genuine warmth emanating from him, a silent promise of support and shared excitement. This wasn't just another project; this was going to be a truly memorable, joy-filled quest.

[heilanlecoq]

At The Bell Wedding | Heilan x Sunny

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In a way, they were both innate risk-takers, Sunny and Heilan. Their lives were a testament to embracing the unknown, whether it was pioneering new design concepts or embarking on eccentric, passion-driven projects. They navigated bold ideas and unconventional paths with an almost reckless ease, pushing boundaries in every aspect of their lives—except, it seemed, when it came to the precarious landscape of their own feelings. There, a silent, invisible barrier stood, and neither would dare take a single step further. Heilan, especially, had made a solemn, private vow to himself: he wouldn't risk their friendship, a bond forged and strengthened over more than twenty years, for something as fragile and potentially destructive as his unspoken, burgeoning emotions. But then Sunny looked at him across the crowded, joyous wedding reception, his eyes crinkling at the corners with that familiar, genuine warmth, and in that instant, Heilan’s heart didn't just leap; it soared, a wild bird breaking free from its cage. He would do everything for this man. Anything. God, he loved him. It was a truth so profound, so overwhelming, that it felt too much to bear, a silent, beautiful burden that settled deep within his chest. "The vows?" he asked, his voice a little softer, a little more vulnerable than he intended, in return to Sunny's earlier, casual question about the ceremony. "Very much like them," he murmured, the words barely escaping his lips as his mind became completely consumed by Sunny. Heilan watched the way Sunny smiled, a gentle, almost wistful curve of his lips, and the genuine, tender look he gave the newly wedded couple. It was a look of pure happiness for others, and it resonated so deeply within Heilan that it made his own heart sing a melody only he could hear, a quiet symphony of adoration. Time, a fickle companion at such events, danced by, marked by laughter, clinking glasses, and the ebb and flow of conversations. Soon, the lively chatter gave way to the irresistible, pulsating rhythm of the music, signaling that it was time for guests to take to the dance floor. If there was anything Heilan loved to do, it was dancing—the freedom of movement, the shared energy, the pure, unadulterated joy of it. And to do it with Sunny? That was a different kind of magic altogether. "Come on, let's dance," he urged, a playful, hopeful grin on his face as he reached for Sunny's hand, his fingers brushing against his. Yet, just as Heilan pulled Sunny onto the dance floor, the vibrant, upbeat song that had been thrumming through the hall suddenly segued into a slow, romantic ballad, its tender notes filling the space.

A part of him, a small, vulnerable fragment he rarely acknowledged, tightened with a sudden, unexpected fear. What if Sunny pulled away? What if he turned him down, seeing the unspoken question in Heilan's eyes, the yearning in his touch? He chuckled nervously, a breathy, almost imperceptible sound that was more a release of tension than genuine amusement, as he gently, almost tentatively, placed his hand on Sunny's back, feeling the warmth of his suit jacket through the thin fabric of his palm. Their eyes met, a silent question passing between them in the soft, ambient light. "Who leads?" he whispered, his voice barely audible above the music, his eyes searching Sunny's for an answer, for a sign, for anything that would tell him what came next.

[heilanlecoq]

@sir-scamsalot

[heilanlecoq]

continue from here @sir-scamsalot

Heilan grinned, a wide, enthusiastic smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes, a genuine expression of delight. Oh, he would definitely ask his students to aid him in this grand design adventure! He could already picture their excited faces, their whispered plans, and the inevitable, brilliantly chaotic brainstorming sessions. Who knew what those little troublemakers would come up with, especially when faced with a cause as wonderfully whimsical and inherently inspiring as the Hiding Dodo? Their unbridled creativity, their fearless approach to the seemingly impossible, their uncanny ability to turn any challenge into an exhilarating game — it was exactly what this project needed to truly soar. He tilted his head slightly, a playful yet gentle gesture, at Sunny's somewhat tentative remark. A soft, almost paternal concern flickered in his eyes, a momentary thought that perhaps Sunny genuinely wasn't aware of the depth of their friendship. "I have always time for you, my friend," he said, his voice dropping to a warm, reassuring tone, as if stating the most obvious truth in the world. "Always. Well, I'm looking quite forward to this sparkly adventure of the search for the dodo. I swear, you have the brightest of ideas sometimes!" He clapped Sunny lightly on the shoulder, a genuine warmth emanating from him, a silent promise of support and shared excitement. This wasn't just another project; this was going to be a truly memorable, joy-filled quest.

[heilanlecoq]

@HEILANLECOQ/  a  private writing account belonging to the roleplay group happiestplacehq  as hei hei, known in Redwood Hollow as Heilan LeCoq. based   on   the  disney film from 2016 'MOANA ' written  by   Naomi ( she/her,   29,  gmt+1-2 ). 

tags;

■𝕳𝖊𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖓 𝕷𝖊𝕮𝖔𝖖 ➮ 𝒞𝒶𝓃 𝐼 𝑒𝒶𝓉 𝐻𝒾𝓂?. : 𝒮𝓊𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝓍 𝐻𝑒𝒾𝓁𝒶𝓃. (ship tag) ■𝕳𝖊𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖓 𝕷𝖊𝕮𝖔𝖖 ➮ 𝒮𝑒𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓁𝒾𝓃𝑒 𝓌𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝓀𝓎 𝓂𝑒𝑒𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝑒𝒶. (musing) ■𝕳𝖊𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖓 𝕷𝖊𝕮𝖔𝖖 ➮ 𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝒸𝒽𝒾𝒸𝓀𝑒𝓃 𝒽𝑒 𝓁𝒾𝓋𝑒𝓈. (thread) ■𝕳𝖊𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖓 𝕷𝖊𝕮𝖔𝖖 ➮ 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝒽𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝓈𝓉𝑜𝓁𝑒𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒽𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝒹𝑒𝑒𝓅 𝒾𝓃𝓈𝒾𝒹𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊. (starter) ■𝕳𝖊𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖓 𝕷𝖊𝕮𝖔𝖖 ➮ 𝒩𝒶𝑜𝓂𝒾 𝑀𝒶𝓀𝑒𝓈 𝑀𝑜𝑜𝒹𝒷𝑜𝒶𝓇𝒹𝓈. (moodboard)

connections

■𝕳𝖊𝖎𝖑𝖆𝖓 𝕷𝖊𝕮𝖔𝖖 ➮ 𝒮𝓊𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝒮𝒸𝒶𝓂𝓈𝒶𝓁𝑜𝓉.