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hell-dust · 3 days ago

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YESSS FEEEEED MEEEEE

*your art and writing

I WILL ALWAYS STAND FOR THIS AMANDA SLANDER✊✊✊✊

Bonding over flames.

This takes place in the zombie apocalypse au with @tacticalsp , where rather than in the regular au, Erik is able to escape the confines of jail much faster. (For reference in the main au Fierce would be around 25 when he's let out)

So uh yeah

On a cold night as fall transitions to the early stages of winter, Fierce finally gets to have that talk with her father about what exactly happened in her life after he regretfully leaves her with the woman he never knew could be so hostile.

there's a talk of somewhat violence but it's quite mild and is truly only referencing my earlier writings

For such a seemingly horrifying apocalypse, the nights were calming. Occasional zombie groans were seen as ambiance, along with crickets and fireflies that had survived to the aftermath of it all. Penny was at a separate place with Lif, like almost every night. They pull all nighters, drawing on the walls of the abandoned shack the goth calls home. They were telling a story. A story for anyone who'd stumble upon this small building in the future. If there even will be one. Dee had finally passed out on his makeshift bed, various papers littering the floor with pen marks jotting down observations. Small capsules containing a bit of Fierce’s blood - some altered with chemicals - were set on his desk, which was hanging by a thread really. Duct tape holding up the legs, splinter ridden edges, and small dents.

Blaire’s spirit was out of the camp on its way, her human body safely on a pile of blankets. She didn't often sleep in beds. Fierce sat next to Dee, watching him rest with a relieved expression. He truly hasn't gotten a good night's sleep in a long time. Her hand was absentmindedly playing with his hair as she gazed out the window. Tonight was clear, little white pecks dusting the sky along with a full moon that shone in. Though a new light immerged. Orange. Fierce raised an eyebrow, carefully rising to her feet and stepping over each spot she knew creaked. Dee was a light sleeper, so the last thing she wanted was to make him wake up on the one night he was sleeping well.

Sliding her shoes on, Fierce carefully pushed the front door of the camp open. She then saw Erik sitting there, lighting off dry branches and leaves. His expression was a mix of things. He was deep in thought.

The man had only arrived to the base a week prior, there was still so much to take in. And like his daughter, his mind kept him awake.

Fierce knew he'd hear her. Her shoes crunched the leaves, a breeze flowing through her entire body. Though it was soon enveloped in warmth from the growing flame.

“Hey, dad.” She sat beside Erik, her voice soft and reverent. He didn't move his head, continuing to stare at the flames. “Hi, vamp.”

“Is that a new nickname for me?” Fierce tried to lighten the mood, nudging his shoulder. He cracked a smile, reaching to ruffle her hair. “If you'd like it to be.”

A comfortable silence ensued. He tossed some more leaves into the fire, listening to it crackle. “I see why you'd be out here now.” Fierce hummed, closing her eyes. “It's quieter without the bickering.”

Erik shook his head, “No.. I like your friends. It's just nice and cold this time of year, gives me an excuse to make fire.”

“You like it? Like.. Burning stuff?”

“Sometimes. When I first escaped my cell, I took this lighter from a zombified cop. It felt cool.”

“Badass.”

“..A better term, thank you.”

The wind blew particularly fast, making the fire enlarge quickly. The sudden change made Fierce jump a bit. Erik stayed unmoving.

“Quick on your feet, huh?” He grinned, his fangs identical to hers. She snickered, crossing her arms. “You gotta be out here in this hellscape. And well.. I have fast reflexes for other reasons..”

Erik paused, his eyes narrowing. More sticks thrown in the fire. “You had mentioned us talking about.. Whats been going on without me here.” He seemed a little tense, as did Fierce. “Ah right, I did.” She took a shaky breath, staring down at the needle grass. “Well, I'd assume you know Amanda.”

“My.. Pen friend? The woman I found zombified and chained up? I was wondering how-”

“That was me.” Fierce cut him off, biting her lip out of nervousness. “It's not like you knew but.. She wasn't the greatest person in the world.”

Erik bristled. He wanted to assume that maybe Amanda was just bitchy. “She.. Wasn't that bad was she?”

“When I turned five everything went downhill.” Fierce grimaced, pulling her knees up to her chest. He didn't like the sound of that.

“That.. Monster gradually began forcing me to clean the most miniscule things. Went from what I thought were regular chores into the thing I'd be dreading for the rest of my time before this apocalypse.”

Erik was holding onto nothing. He felt.. Guilt. An insane amount of it. He should have never left Fierce with that abomination of a human being. “She surely didn't physically harm you, did she?-”

He saw the tears in Fierce’s eyes. The subject brought back horrible memories. Made her think again of the bathroom mirror. Staring at herself with disgust. Feeling the blood drip down onto the countertop as she hallucinated a gun at her head. “She.. She did.” Her voice was choked, and she bit her hand so hard it started to bleed.

“Don't.. Don't do that please..” Erik murmured, carefully moving her hand away from her mouth. He was trying not to cry himself. “If you don't want to talk about it anymore, you don't have to-”

“You deserve to know.” Fierce sounded dejected, wiping the tears away as best she could. Despite the still raging fire, she felt cold. “I can't just keep this part of my life from you, it's not your fault you got separated from me..”

She then sighed, slowly pulling her shirt just enough to reveal her shoulders. Scar covered. Some looked more recent than others. “There's more but that gives a general idea of what she did.” She quickly fixed her shirt again, avoiding eye contact. Erik was speechless. Though now angry. Not at Fierce, but Amanda. And a bit at himself.

“I wish I fucking killed her myself.” He hissed, gritting his teeth. “There's no need to be pissed about it. I won anyways. She's dead.” Fierce gave a weak smile, doing what looked like jazz hands. “You can always.. Kill her twice if ya wanted to. But really, I'm over it.”

Erik softened again, his shoulders slumping. “You don't seem like it. Talking about it clearly brought things back into your head.”

“..You got me.” That weak voice again. Fire was slowly dying down, the crickets overriding every other sound.

“Maybe it's a bit too late to talk about it.” Erik leaned his chin on the palm of his hand, staring ahead of him. “We can continue this in the morning if you'd like.”

“I.. Yeah. That sounds like a better idea.”

“I'm sure.. What's his name- Dee would be waiting for you anyways.”

“Nah, he fell asleep. Thankfully.” Fierce exhaled, that familiar smile grazing her features. “Poor dude hasn't gotten a proper rest in far too long. He's always up examining shit.. It's kinda cool, but I worry for him.”

Erik snickered. “Sounds like your mother. She'd never sleep. Though it was for unrelated reasons. You.. Look a lot like her.”

“Oh, I know. I've seen her.”

He froze. “You.. What?”

“Fuc- y’know what? I'll save that for the morning too. It's.. Complicated? I.. Kinda sorta.. Died. And then found mom, whom uh.. Was able to send me back here after a week.”

“You died.”

Fierce sucked in her teeth, though didn't expect the next words.

“And found Odette.. That means heaven and hell are real. She's out there.”

Fierce smiled again, enjoying the more positive take on it all. Erik then got serious. “Though I would like to know how you died. If.. Someone did it.”

“Oh. Yeah, there's no need to worry. The guy got his karma.”

By now the fire had completely died out, leaving nothing but ashes in its place. A loud howl echoed in the distance, it sounded like Blaire.

“It's a little disappointing to me though.” Fierce continued, holding her hair in her hands. “The one who did it.. I knew him. He totally sucked and wanted Dee, so he took drastic measures. That asshole always had it out for me anyways.”

“Sounds a lot like someone Odette knew in the past.” Erik remarked, now leaned back to stare at the sky. He then shrugged, “Though it's a long story.”

“Yeah..”

Fierce went to stand up, stretching and shaking her arms to warm them up. “I guess we should head inside, unless you want to stay out here.”

“I'll come in.” Erik followed after her, bringing the lighter with him.

The heater Dee fixed was working quite well tonight, filling the whole cabin with perfect 75 degree air. “I guess I'll go to sleep now.” Fierce yawned, rubbing her eyes. “I'll.. Sit.”

That made her laugh a bit, and she headed towards the door to Dee's room. “I'm glad you’re here, dad. Makes me feel less shitty about all of this.”

“..Glad you’re here too, vamp.” He treaded off into a space that was once unused, now filled with blankets and pillows. Fierce had one of her favorite Megadeth vinyls in there, to give Erik a piece of herself essentially. He stared at it, tracing the corners for a moment before feeling his eyes droop. He allowed himself to slowly fall back, laying in a mass of softness.

Fierce slowly closed Dee’s door on the way in, spotting him still asleep in the same spot. He hadn't moved an inch.

She lay beside him, noticing he still had his glasses on. meticulously removing them, Fierce set the pair over on a small - and quite worn - nightstand.

By then she had already fallen half asleep. Her head on the pillow, eyes closed, just.. Resting them. That's all it was.

One thing led to another, and her mind had fled elsewhere. The weight of today caught up to her, and out she was. Maybe she too had been struggling with sleep until now.

Though it felt nicer knowing someone she held oh so dearly in her heart is back in her life.

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hell-dust · 3 days ago

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AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH DEEEEEJAAAAAYYYYY MY BELOVED 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

I'm overwhelmed by the cuteness please right more–

Secret

silly fic because im seeing them on my feed and from mooties^^

this takes a more fantasy approach on jay’s animal identity because i love fantasy stuff and it makes me happy lols (and species dysphoria SUCKS ass)

a fair warning, im not the best writer. most stories, character concepts, etc are nicer in my head lols.

warning for some language xp

(jay’s POV)

“Oh my gosh, he’s SUCH a dreamboat!”

Squeaking.

“Yeah, practice was great! Can’t wait for the party tonight.”

Thumping.

“I can’t believe you said that!”

Teeth.

Ears.

Snout.

Whiskers.

Strangers.

Panic.

It was last period. After a long day of burnout, masking, and sensory overload, I was ready to leave. I could hear everyone and everything around me. That light is too bright. She’s smacking her lips. He’s drumming an off-beat tune on the desk. The windows aren’t opened the same amount. I’m too cold. I’m about to shift. Human life is weird. I wanna go home. No one can know about-

I was jolted out of my thoughts by the final bell. Thank the Gods. Clutching my necklace for Hestia, I said a quick thank-you-prayer and trudged out of class. At least it was Friday. I had planned to meet up with Dee tonight for a sleepover. As much as I wanted to reschedule, I knew he would make me feel better.

“314, 309, 295, 287… 283. Here it is!”

I mumbled quietly under my breath as I counted the lockers to find my own. As I shoved my belongings in my locker, there was a presence behind me.

“Boo!”

It was Heavy. He looked up at me with a large smile, radiating his infectious enthusiasm.

“Ready to go home? You’re still spending the night, right?”

“Totally, dude. Where’s Dee?”

“Ugh, it’s always Dee, Dee, Dee. It’s almost like you don’t care about me…”

Heavy sighed, dramatically falling back against the lockers.

“Oh, stop it. You know I love you, little man.”

I hooked my arm around his neck, ruffling his hair with my free hand. He giggled and struggled out of my grip. Just then, Dee turned the corner. He looked a little irritated at the sight of me roughhousing with his brother, but still gave us a smile.

“Oh, great. There’s your stupid boyfriend, stealing you away from me again…”

Heavy sighed once more. Before I could respond, Dee gave him a quick slap on the back of the head.

“Shut up. Let’s get going.”

We shared a collective giggle before exiting through the main doors. The more I walked, the stronger my senses got. Even the soft breeze made my whiskers tingle, despite them not being there. My urge to bite and run and explore grew worse as well. Looking at small animals and the forests behind the passing houses only pushed me further.

“Jay! You zoned out. Did you hear me?”

“Oh, no, I didn’t. I’m sorry. What is it?”

Heavy began talking about a new video game he had been delving into over the past week. I tried my best to listen, but I was beginning to lose touch with reality. My usually racing mind came to a hault, and I knew I needed to change things up before I did something I would regret. Dee and Heavy didn’t know about my shifting, and I wasn’t going to tell them any time soon. Some things are best left unsaid. I couldn’t risk losing people so precious to me.

“Woah, look! It’s your house! Who wants a piggyback ride?”

I asked, leaning down to eye level with Heavy in the hopes that he would get me grounded again. Luckily, his eyes lit up, and he jumped onto my back.

“Ooh, me, me, me!”

“Last one there has to let me use their toothbrush!”

“You forgot your toothbrush? Gross!”

We ran off towards the iron gate surrounding the Shvagenbagen residence. Dee chuckled and followed behind us in a light jog. I burst through the gate with Heavy in my arms and flopped onto the grass. I still felt detached from my head, but it seemed to have calmed down.

“Get up, you two. We’re not even inside yet.”

Dee offered me a hand, pulling me up and giving me a hug. It felt nice, but his hair was brushing against my teeth and whiskers, bringing back the shifty feeling. I reluctantly pulled away and snuck him a quick peck on the cheek before walking towards the front door. Heavy ran ahead and burst inside.

“We’re home!”

He announced into the main room before running upstairs. I quickly greeted Mr. Glam and Mrs. Vicky as I followed him. The light streaming through the windows hurt my eyes, and I started to feel light on my feet. It couldn’t happen now. Not now, not ever.

“Don’t worry about him. Let’s go put away your things.”

Dee led me to his bedroom where I put my small bag of necessities. He sat on the foot of the bed and patted the space next to him, looking at me expectantly. He must’ve noticed my discomfort as I sat down, because he reached for my hand, squeezing it with an unusual amount of concern.

“Are you okay?”

He asked simply. It caught me off guard.

“Pfft! Of course I am, silly. Why wouldn’t I be okay?”

I responded, slightly stumbling over my words. Speaking was becoming increasingly more difficult.

“You haven’t been yourself. I noticed it as soon as we began walking home.”

“Ah, I’m just tired. I’m all good, man.”

“There it is again! You haven’t been talking the same, either.”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“You always call me some kind of name. Not dude or man. It’s always baby or something like that!”

I sighed, the guilt hitting me like a ton of bricks. I never knew how much he actually paid attention to me. While that made me happy, it made me upset that he worried so much.

“Okay… Maybe I haven’t been myself.”

I admitted quietly, breaking eye contact.

“So you admit it. Can you tell me what’s been on your mind?”

His question caught me off guard. I didn’t know what to say.

“I don’t know… It’s a secret.”

“A secret? Then why did you-“

“Say I wouldn’t keep them? I don’t. Except one. Nobody knows about that except one person.”

“Why can’t I be the second? You can tell me anything, Jay. I won’t love you any less.”

“Because it’s serious. It could put you and me in danger.”

Dee’s eyes widened, mainly from shock. I saw something in his gaze that I couldn’t identify. He looked like he was struggling to understand, which was out of the ordinary for him. To my surprise, he grabbed my other hand and leaned in, his eyes wide with curiosity.

“Tell me.”

“What-?”

“Please, Jay. I want to know.”

I took a deep breath, closing my eyes. One, I was overwhelmed. Two, I was about to put our relationship at risk, and I didn’t know how to handle it.

“Fine. Tonight. Wait til’ everyone’s asleep.”

“Wow… Thank you.”

“Yeah, yeah, now stop looking at me like that. You’re being weird too.”

“Hah, right… Sorry.”

__________________________

The rest of the evening was a downward spiral. I could hardly contain myself as we waited for dinner. I took my seat at the table in between Dee and Heavy. There were so many smells in the air, irritating my heightened senses. I begged for it to go by quickly.

I was squeezing Dee’s hand with white knuckles as we ate. Suddenly, a sharp chill went up my spine.

“I’m done. May I be excused? Thanks.”

I crammed my request into one word before standing abruptly, the chair squeaking harshly against the floor. I hastily ran upstairs towards Dee’s room, slamming the door and jumping on the bed in one motion.

I immediately fell to my knees.

“Goddamn it.. Fuck, my head..”

I felt myself growing. Changing. Shifting.

I desperately tried to force it away, causing an excruciating pain to ring throughout my body. My head was spinning, alarm bells going off. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I never held myself back.

Tears filled my eyes in an instant, and my heart rate was higher than it had ever been before. I shook my head, feeling dizzy.

“Shit, not now.. Please…”

The skin in my hands shifted colors and shape, forming my paws. I tried desperately to keep them from changing, but it felt like all the bones in my hands were shattering. I shoved my head into the pillows, muffling the sound of my pained sobbing and retching. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. The pain of being something I wasn’t was too much.

Closing my eyes, I shifted.

My mind was finally clear, like the thoughts sorted themselves out. No more worries. No more questions. Just peace and order. I didn’t have to worry about all my bodily functions or human responsibilities. I was simply free.

I shifted at random. Whichever previous body I had in another life was not up to me. When I opened my eyes, I had changed. My hands had become bright orange paws, and I had doubled in size. My body was covered in dark stripes. Great. Tiger.

I tried to step off of the bed to avoid breaking it. I looked around for a place to hide, but it was no use. Just as I had turned my back, the door opened.

“Jay..?”

Dee froze in his tracks, his jaw hitting the floor and his eyes wide in astonishment. I opened my mouth to speak, but it was useless. I growled softly, shaking my head to reassure him.

“What-? How? Why..?”

He took a small step back, and my heart broke. I knew it was a bad idea to show him this side of me. My eyes grew foggy, and I simply bowed my head in defeat.

Just then, I felt a hand on my nose.

“Is this your secret..?”

Dee asked, still in disbelief. I nodded, hoping he would understand. To my surprise, he did. He sat on his knees and wrapped his arms around my neck, burying his face in my fur.

“You’re beautiful… I can’t believe you were hiding this.”

I was thrilled. However, I couldn’t express myself in this form, so I settled for licking him. His hair stood up on end, and he giggled before brushing it down.

“I love you.”

I growled, then huffed, and finally, laughed, glancing down at my now-human hands.

“I love you more, dummy!”

I jumped into his arms, peppering kisses all over his face and squeezing him with all my strength.

“I cant believe you actually think it’s cool!”

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re my light. I’ll never stop loving you, dumbass.”

Dee chuckled, rubbing my back.

“Just promise me something, okay?”

“Anything!”

“No more secrets. Please? You can change as much as you’d like, just no more secrets.”

“No more secrets! Got it!”

He smiled and pressed his forehead against my own. I gave him another quick kiss before pulling away.

“We’d better get back before my parents get suspicious.”

“Yeah.. That’s a good idea.”

“Lead the way, my tigress.”

__________________________

End.

ble

cringe is my middle name🤑

sorry for my mediocre writing. school starts tomorrow so maybe they’ll knock some sense into me.

much love<3

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