hihihji

[hihihji]

just saw a birth announcement thing that was like "3 inches went in. 19 inches came out" and i am on the floor in tears i'm laughing so hard what is wrong with heterosexual people

[hihihji]

every time I post about how much I hate my period some dumbass terf gets mad about my "internalized misogyny" for "hating my natural woman body" so periodic reminder that I'm a cis woman and I hate my period, my uterus can eat shit, and I'd flush my ovaries down the toilet given half an opportunity fuck this shit 🖕🖕🖕

[hihihji]

need a t-shirt that says i had a weird heavily symbolic dream last night please don't talk to me

[hihihji]

Doctors purposefully give people very conservative life expectancy estimates because it is better for the person to have their affairs in order long before it is necessary than to be shocked by how rapidly their health is declining. This should be obvious but you would not believe the amount of people who are like “My father was given 3 months to live 5 months ago. This is proof all doctors are idiots and stupid. Look at him. He’s fine.” pan to a guy actively doing the death rattle.

[hihihji]

The thing about growing up with undiagnosed autism is that you’re a bad kid. And you don’t know how to stop being a bad kid. But you’re pedantic, you hate hugs, you’d rather be alone than attend a family gathering, you play by yourself instead of with friends or family, you make mealtime impossible, you can’t even look your parents in the face, you lie to get out of going to school and when you’re there you complete your assignments correctly but in a way that is somehow inherently wrong. You’re wrong. There is something wrong with you and you can’t identify it or fix it. You can’t begin to explain it. You pull for justifications and apologies. You were a bad kid and there was nothing you could do to be better.

[hihihji]

My husband was overjoyed that his misogynist coworker finally quit. THE next day a different coworker came out as transfemme.

Imagine being such a shit toward women that one of them just waits in the closet until the moment you’re gone.

[hihihji]

Tiny kitty that can be made with 2 pipe cleaners. If you care. If you even care.

[hihihji]

[hihihji]

What really ticks me off when talking about ai is when people are like "it's unavoidable" or "you'll have to learn to use it someday" or "its going to be part of the future" like no it's plenty avoidable actually if you have a spine stronger than a dandelion. You simply say "no" and continue to use your own goddamn brain.

[hihihji]

You know things are so normal in America when a government agency has to say we are not the gestapo. With your help we can raise the number to 500% increase in ICE officer assaults

[hihihji]

Just realised that whenever I see the phrase "I wouldn't touch that with a ten foot pole" I automatically think of a ten metre pole. Like a comically long pole. A ten foot pole isn't all that long. That's slightly less than two of my body lengths. Not touching something with a ten foot pole still lets you get pretty close to it actually.

[hihihji]

I hate the gymbro side of the internet because a lot of it is extremely toxic but I once saw a gymbro meme that was like “befriending the local trans guy so I can steal his testosterone” and I think that’s hilarious and a great plot idea for a movie. Deeply unhappy bigoted red pill meathead gym rat starts trying to befriend a trans man to steal his testosterone and ends up genuinely clicking with him and going on a journey of self discovery that either ends in the protag realizing he’s gay and in love with his friend or transitioning to a woman.

[hihihji]

new strat

[hihihji]

[hihihji]

they teach you the golden rule, treat others how you want to be treated, but in a pinch you can apply the silver rule (be kinda selfish because you’ve earned it) or even the bronze rule (manipulate others purely for your benefit).

[hihihji]

children are so fucking funny man. i just overheard a kid go “i just learned a new way to pinch, wanna see it? it hurts a lot more!” followed by a loud, notably pained scream

[hihihji]

it sucks that the backrooms and by extent liminal spaces turned out the way they did in popular culture. i love dreamy places not because they're full of Scary Screatures or whatever but because they're fun and interesting and cool and a perfect place for a girl like me to lay her eggs