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Character Pieces.

    Matilda was her name.She was an interesting California girl that spent most of her time behind books and trying to score the highest grades in all her classes. They called her  “Anti-Matilda,” for countless reasons. She was anti social and never really bothered to make any friends. Except for the janitor whom she’d occasionally wave goodbye to after the Environmental Club meetings she’d attend, only because she needed an extracurricular on her resume and that was the only club that didn’t require much speaking. But nonetheless, Matilda was Matilda in all ways possible. No one knew much about her, or even bothered to talk to her, because well, she was Matilda. Although there was just one thing about her that really stood out. More than her reserved, isolated personality, there was one thing that really made Matilda unique. She was ugly. As cruel as it sounds, Matilda really was just ugly. Everyone knew it, even she did. Despite her kindness on rare occasions when she does something, Matilda’s physical appearance wasn’t really all that appealing. She had a long hooked nose, braces pretty much all her life due to an extreme overbite, eyes of different sizes ( one lower than the other), and a huge forehead, almost the size of both her fists together. Growing up, ,Matilda was well aware of her “unusual” appearance. But it never seemed to bother her. Her classmates would tease her and call her various names like “trash face,” or “Matilda the ugly duckling. “ Even her teachers would sometimes sit and stare at her with great fascination  due to her ugliness. No one really has seen anyone that ugly. Although it’s quite hard to believe, Matilda was uglier than her 70 year old granpa John that got into a car accident and had his face all deformed and dysfunctional. But yet again, none of that bothered Matilda. She always accepted her ugliness and embraced it in every way possible. But, one thing no one really knew, not even Matilda, was that she was perfectly capable of changing the world for the better. She was smart and had the brains to do almost anything. However, Matilda never really put it to good use as she was always reserved and only applied her knowledge in school. Matilda was capable of innovating and creating different thing that could help society in numerous ways. Things that could’ve better her town, her life, and even brought her great fortune. But unfortunately, she became too caught up in concealing her identity that all that knowledge and wisdom went down the drain. As much as Matilda accepted her ugly appearance, she accepted it to the point where her inward appearance turned into the ugly person that people said she really was. Her whole life from then on just became ugly.

   Dear Matilda,

       To me you’re beautiful. I know that to a lot of people it may seem like your rather disturbing physical appearance overpowers any other quality of yours, but to me that appearance is what beautifies you. You don’t have to be physically attractive to be beautiful. Beauty is not defined by the outward image, but rather the inward personality that you hold. That being said, why hold such a beautiful personality. Why reserve yourself from the life that allows you to freely embrace yourself in every way possible. I don’t know too much about you. No one really does. But I’d like to because i know that there's something in you that really defines who you are in the best way possible. There’s something in you that sets you apart from every other person and that can take you a long way. Despite the amazing grades and that great brain of yours, you could put all that knowledge to good use and show the world that it’s what's on the inside that really matters. Yes, the so called “ugliness” that people say you have is something that you’ve accepted. However, I disagree. You should not accept things that are said to be true. I believe that by accepting the negativity that people place upon you and your appearance, your setting yourself up to be that ugly person that people make you out to be- but you’re not. Matilda, you are very capable of doing things that many can’t do. You got the brains for it! There are people out there with greater problems that need people like you to relate and help them go through life. People of problems far worse than your apparently ugly appearance which I without a doubt disagree with. People need you and your brain to help them move through life just as you have for the past 18 years despite the criticism you get on a daily.So all I can say with to you is to go out and do it! Embrace your personality and who you are. Take control of your life. But most of all, put that brain of yours to good use because I believe that it’s you who can make the world a better place.

                                                              Sincerely,

         Husniya

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Water. (object piece)

     There wasn’t much of me left. But enough to keep her from drying her body out to death. Enough to keep her functioning for just a little while longer. She kept staring at me in deep thirst with conflicting thoughts. Should she have me or not? Should she save me for later? The thought of her warm, now dried up, shivering palms, wrapping around every  sole of my body, every ridge that kept my shape. The thought of how much relief I could provide her. The comfort that came with what I gave. The comfort in tasting me with every fibre of her being. It was surreal really. Just the thought entering into her body with an almost slippery feel. The thought of just sliding into her with alluring comfort, soothing every part of her that dried up like moldy raisins. But she wouldn't have me just yet.

She was saving me.  To save herself.

     There I sat, on the tip of the rock staring directly into her tired, glassy blue eyes.  Her face full of fear and exhaustion, I wondered how much she was suffering on the inside. Trapped in the middle of nowhere, there was only so much of me left to keep her going. I needed to be preserved. But the temptation to just slide into every part of her that needed to be enlightened with my touch. That needed to be touched so that her mind can begin to ponder in this lonely island that has nothing to offer. Until she was found I must remain clean and clear, so that when I meet the ridges of her mouth I could quench her thirst. That thirst that haunted her. That thirst that feared her existence for the next day.

But she was saving me. To save herself.

     When she hesitantly placed me on the palm of her cold hands, I was pressed against her cheeks as they absorbed me in every way possible. It was fascinating I tell you. The way her skin would soak me up and hold on to me until it lost its strength and I came sprinkling down-but not the same. I sprinkled down now contaminated with the fibres of her cheeks that brought great discomfort. I was no longer the same. I was contaminated. No longer clean and clear. But there was still more left of me. In that crippled container on the rock, I still remained whole longing to be entered into the body of dehydration.

Still being saved, I was there. To save her.

     When time came I could feel the tremor of her palms lifting me in the container, unable to resist the temptation of just pouring me into herself one final time. The last time that I would feel the comfort of meeting every corner inside her, every ridge, every muscle that needed me to function. When I entered her it was like I was cleansing every sickening cell that needed to be healed in time. Whirling into her mouth, I fed every part of her in thirst, hydrating every organ until there was none of me left to spare. It was unthinkable. To just be poured into her system and soothe a soul that was about to leave it’s body- it was unthinkable. I may have spared her a couple hours. A couple hours to reminisce about her life while I soak inside of her watching every piece of her body slowly failing to exist. Until I disappeared and they was no longer enough of me to spare.

Nothing of me left to be saved. Nothing left to save her.  

[husniyan-blog]

ADVICE - Appreciation

“It’s a beautiful thing to have lungs that allow you to breathe air and legs that allow you to climb mountains, and it’s a shame that sometimes we don’t realize that that’s enough.”

   We currently live in a very materialistic world. Preoccupied by the thoughts and things we don’t have, many of us tend to forget how much more fortunate we actually are, despite everything we want. If there is one piece of advice that I’d give someone, it’s that we should never take things for granted, but rather appreciate what we already have.

   Take a look around and you’ll find endless things that we have, that many don’t. Whether it be clean water, food, a phone, we have things that some may not be able to find, let alone afford.

   We hear people complain about their outdated phone, car, etc, that we tend to lose a sense of gratefulness within and seek a more materialistic life. Although it may be nice to have a fancy car, the newest phone or the best wardrobe, sometimes, it’s not the physical/ material world that really matters- it’s what’s within. It’s the values, the morals, and the humility that we hold that really matters. We need to be more appreciative of what we already have, including what’s to come our way.

   In the midst of life, a lot of us tend to forget about the little things in life. The things that we take for granted. You don’t realize how amazing things like nature are until you take the time to embrace nature’s finest touch in every way possible. It’s amazing how big of an impact a sweet summer breeze has in brightening up your day. However, one of the most important things in life that we must not take for granted is our family. Big or small, family is family. Some don’t realize how good they had it until they’re gone. When we strive to appreciate everyone we have in our lives, we are capable of building stronger bonds with people and creating real relationships with them. Consumed by many material influences, we tend to lose actual bonds between people and take their existence for granted, assuming they’d be there for you whenever. However, with life altering situations taking place everyday, it’s important to take a moment to appreciate the people you have and acknowledge the place they hold in your life.

   It’s a natural occurrence for everyone to fall off the tracks of gratitude at some point in time. Everyone has times where they find themselves wanting more than what they already have or need. However, it is essential that we regain that gratitude in order to maintain a balanced life both with the personal, and materialistic world.  Furthermore, there are many things that we are perfectly capable of surviving without- except family. They are people that offer you things in life in which many other objects cannot. Staying around those we love is the happiness that is always right in front of us, which is why it’s important to appreciate them more and do things that continuously remind us to appreciate family in every way possible and remind ourselves of what we’d be without them.

   To never take things for granted and appreciate what you have already, is a piece of advice that I’d give to everyone and anyone. To appreciate is something that you can never over excessively do. Appreciation centers us and allows us to become more self aware of the little things that bring us true happiness. By seeking positivity in the little things that we have in our lives, gratitude is most achievable in anyone.

[husniyan-blog]

Killer. (Dialogue)

Kim: I wish I had more time with her, she was my best friend.

Husniya: I wish I could relate.

Kim: What do you mean?

Husniya: She’s just a person. People come and go.

Kim: Aren’t you sad our best friend is dead? I assumed you would be.

Husniya: I don’t care.

Kim: What?! What the hell is wrong with you?

Husniya: Well… I sort of killed her.

Kim: You shouldn’t be joking about this.

Husniya: No really, I actually did it.

Kim: What the hell! How could you?

Husniya: I just felt like it. She was right there.

Kim: YOU PSYCHOPATH! HOW?? WHAT THE HELL THIS ISN’T FUNNY!!!

Husniya: Dude, relax, it’s not a big deal.

Kim: That’s not possible.

Husniya:  What do you mean? I gave her a drink that was filled with bleach.

Kim: That doesn’t make any sense.

Husniya: What? How?

Kim: Because I made that drink….it was meant for you.

[husniyan-blog]

Grocery Store (Dialogue)

   Matilda walks into the grocery store tired. Wearing torn sweatpants and an over -sized hoodie with her earphones in, Matilda walks in tired. Cursing through her phone , she pushes her grocery cart into the crowded store and knocks down the soup cans stacked in the corner of the store near the entrance. Frustrated, she curses at herself, her phone, the soup cans, the crowd of people that passed by her and storms off far into the Deli-Foods aisle. Leaving her cart behind, Matilda looks through the turkeys stacked in the freezer as she points at each price tag. Grabbing the turkey on the far end of the shelf, she takes a peek at the price tag and begins cursing again at everything. Furious, Matilda throws the turkey across the aisle, hitting a customer right at the back of the head. Security storms through the side doors intimidated and irritated by Matilda. As she continued tossing turkeys all around the store, a crowd of shoppers circles Matilda. Some in shock, some with their phones out trying to get  better view of her tantrum, and some trying to calm her down but simply can’t find a way to do it without grabbing on to her hand and pulling her down. Moments later security arrives, angry and howling at Matilda in all directions. Matilda fights security and grabs the last of the turkey on the shelf and cast it right into security’s outrageously large belly. She rapidly runs out the store yelling at everyone, pushing them away with great rage. Security chases after her in a limpish manner with an aching belly. Few minutes past and the crowd went back to minding their own business and picking up the thrown turkeys.

         Matilda and the security guard never returned to the grocery store.

[husniyan-blog]

The Dark. The Yellow. The Tan.

The dark

It used to feel right

The mask that covered all the fine lines

It was right

It was the darkness that blanketed the heavy body with comfort

With shadowing ease it kept it silent

Kept it from its reveal

The darkness was the healing process

Outside the mask

The light just seemed too bright

Too bright to remove the grey blanket that was trying to heal

Heal it’s fragile soul with alluring comfort

O that light

That yellow light that seeped through the greys

It’s stubborn self refused to reveal

Reveal it’s damage to the light that tried to shine

Through those woven greys the light bled

Bled onto the surface of the blemished tan skin that glistened in the clear

When the darkness faded it feared

Feared the grey would clash with the tan

Feared the yellow light would shine too bright

Feared the grey, the yellow, the tan would blend in unison to reveal its discomfort with every other light that shined

But it was because of the light

That light

That it fought the grey crusade

With yellow beams it let the light in

to shimmer upon its tan self

The self that no longer feared the radiance that came upon it

O the darkness

How it transformed it under the grey

How it blocked the hefty light to heal

To heal what was already healed

What needed yellow beams to complete it

It never revealed with darkness

It couldn’t reveal

It was blocked

Under the grey

Now in light

It’s complete

It

Was

I.

[husniyan-blog]

Courage. Art.

Courage : the ability to do what frightens one.

Courage could mean and be so many things. Everyone has their own type of courage. To me, courage is seeking opportunities in life despite  who I am as a person and my beliefs. Coming from a Muslim background, it can be quite difficult for women specifically, to seek opportunities to the fullest. Wearing a symbol of Islam, a hijab, on a daily can get in the way of moving forward in life at times. Due to various counts of discrimination against Muslim women nowadays, I feel it takes great amounts of courage for us women to seek opportunities and become leaders. As a proud hijab wearing Muslim women, courage to me is taking risks and seek opportunities to showcase what us muslim women can do. Proving to people we are positive leaders despite what society showcases against us, is courage in many ways to me. Whether it be a simple voice one puts out there, to running for a leadership position like Prime Minister, it takes an immense amount of effort and strength to become that leader- a Muslim women leader. Furthermore, to be respected in society as a whole involves having the courage to earn that respect.  In my opinion, it takes great effort and charisma to take a step forward and seek opportunities that women of “my kind” are seen to be incapable of doing.

Courage and art correlated in numerous ways. To showcase art, to be an artist, and to see art takes courage. It takes courage to expose what one may feel, or do within an art piece. Whether it be through music, dance, visual art, etc. it’s not easy to reveal true emotions through art. In doing so takes great amounts of courage to face reality and criticism that may fall into revealing the art. In addition, when one shares something very personal through creative pieces, it takes great courage to search inside oneself and express with freedom to the world what goes on in their mind or life. Many people fear being judged by what they put out for the world to see, making art not as raw, real, or relatable. However, when reality is put into art, that’s when the real beauty of art is seen. In fact, it is quote easy to find or whip up a great art piece and gain a good amount of success from it. But to create or find art that is unique and is done by someone who overcame fears to put a piece together, is simply courage. As courage and art are both correlated, in my opinion, those who are the most courageous are the ones who express freely what they feel in art.

[husniyan-blog]

Crystal Ball.

   A crystal ball can make all the difference.  If looked into one, there are numerous things that I'd like to see for myself. However, one of the most important things that I'd like to see myself as is someone who is a great feminist. I'd hope to see myself empowering women and making a difference among women and their rights around the world. I have always been a firm believer in women's rights and a fighter against sexism. Looking into a crystal ball, I'd like to see myself progress in empowerment in women and be able to do more for them. In addition, as a feminist, I would like to see myself empowering women of my kind- Muslim women with a Hijab over them. Currently there is a lot of discrimination among women, specifically Muslim women with a physical indication of their religion. Furthermore, it is difficult for us women to feel safe and create more opportunities without discrimination or sexism standing in the way. I believe deeply in more women of my kind breaking down barriers and cultural norms, to take on opportunities that'll allow women, and embrace them to become leaders of this male dominated world. I hope looking into a crystal ball, that I become a women with great motivation and strength to become a leader, with other females by my side.

    We live in a big world filled with many issues that need attention. Looking into a crystal ball, there are several things that I hope for the world. One of these things include more peace in the world. Currently we face many tragedies with violence, terrorism, hate and discrimination. As a result, our world and the people in it are suffering. With all the violence and terrorism around, worldly peace decreases day by day. I would like to see the world have a positive change with it's people. More love instead of hate. More smiles instead of tears. More acts of kindness instead of terror. Love and acceptance would create a better world for all life on earth. Looking into a crystal ball I'd like to see less people suffer and more happiness among people. If these things can increase over time, then the world will be a better place.  

[husniyan-blog]

A Messed Up Life.

     That dark, cold night, my cold-hearted mother jumped out that tiny window at the back of the house in the living room. With her small ragged backpack,  she quietly jumped out the rusted window, panting and whispering. My mom, she was trying to run away. Run away to a place where darkness brings light and the light, darkness. A place where no one will know of her, what she’s done, how much she’s done. My mom, she ran away to a place she’ll want to call home. I guess she lied when she told me home was wherever I was. That same night I crept downstairs into the somber living room staring out at the window she left through. Now that she’s gone, she won’t come back. She can’t come back. I walk into the the tiny kitchen that had not been cleaned up since last night’s supper. All I see huddled under the corner leg of the dining room table was grandpa. The old, scrawny, wrinkled up man rubbing his wet eyes and sobbing like a loud baby. His eyes bloodshot red, my grandpa was sobbing. His phone to his ear he sat there crying his pale, now half empty heart out. As I walked towards him with still footsteps he looked up in shock and gazed at me. A gaze that dried up his rotting tears.  I asked him what was wrong but he just kept staring. As if my presence made him forget what was wrong, grandpa kept staring with his twinkling eyes. A minute later he says, “Grandma is dead.” I didn't know how to react. What was I feeling? Sad? Empty? I was feeling nothing. Grandma and I weren't very close. We never talked. I don't do too well with comfort so I just stood and watched Grandpa as he kept gazing into my eyes.  A few empty minutes later the doorbell rang. It was 1:00 am. Who could possibly come at this time? I ran to the old, chipped wooden front door and peaked through the tiny window. It was my friend Johnny. He was drunk and all over the place. I let Johnny in and that indeed was a mistake. Johnny, drunk, started running all over the house causing a tantrum. A 15 year old causing the biggest tantrum of all. I didn't know how to stop him. He was yelling, started crying and even started punching holes through the walls. I tried to sit him down. He wouldn't listen. I grabbed his bony arm an dragged him to the couch. With great resistance Johnny finally started listening to me . He sat down. I sat down. We talked. We talked for hours. About everything. Until Johnny came out with something so gut wrenching I wish I never had let him into my home. Johnny, my childhood friend, my brother, my person, told me he killed my baby sister. Johnny killed my sister. The only family that I love. He started apologizing and panting and became a mess again. I couldn't speak. I was trying to process what has been happening but how could I? First mom, then Grandma, now my sister? I took a step back and looked at Johnny. I didn't say anything to him. I didn't know what to feel. A couple troublesome minutes later I went face to face with Johnny. I hit him. A punch across the face. Then a kick in the stomach. I kept beating. My tired arms and legs couldn't stop. It was as though my baby sister was inside me taking over the very existence of my body. That night was the night no man could ever live. It was the night I should not have had to live. It was the night I realized. The night it finally hit. I Claire Forbes, will have a lifetime of tragedy. There's no escaping it.

[husniyan-blog]

My Sweet.

hello.

how are you?

i think you’re fine, My Sweet.

i want to tell you a story

a story that i should’ve told you awhile back

a story that ended with dry tears

but not because i never felt you leave

My Sweet, it was because you left so gracefully

that the heavens stole my sorrowful tears and

turned them into the very smile you wear in your sleep.

My Sweet, you were the soul that kept the feet of my father going

when the mountains collapsed, you built the shelter

for him to dream in

the very shelter that stands today protecting the memories

that try to bleed through the old doors

and the last person standing behind it

this story, My Sweet

is the story of the time i thought about you

it’s the story that keeps writing

My Sweet, it’s a story i should’ve told you

and  if you’re watching

My Sweet, I Love You.

[husniyan-blog]

The Touch.

  And a touch of rain to grow

the seed that lies beneath

the seed that calls in thirst

to feed the dry land with the

Waters of Nature.

  A touch of snow to freeze

the waters that lie above

the waters that come together in an ocean of love

to shiver in peace with the

Fall of Nature.

  A touch of sun to heat

the bird that lays trapped in it’s nest

the bird that speaks silence at night

for the caged bird sings freedom with the

Heat of Nature.

  But the touch of grief

is ever so engulfing

that the sea floods with the

sound of Natures call.

  The grief that corrupts the existence

Of the Waters

Of the Fall

Of the Heat

Of the Nature that brings home

the sound of glee.

  It’s the grief that races through wind

in the dawn of day

with threatening wings it

clouds the existence of serenity

that creeps within the soul of existence.

  Calling the Nature that brings home peace

It grieves.

The Nature that brings home love

It grieves.

The Nature that brings home existence

It grieves.

  Because it’s the touch of Nature

that can’t soothe the grief that grows.

[husniyan-blog]

Natures Senses.

Underneath the ground comes the

seed that replenishes the dirt with

green glory

  blades that sweep delightful

waters to the soles of feet

Releasing the moisture within.

the

seed that flourishes the aromatic

scent of peace

  roots that strengthen the

blade deep into nature's heart

Unleashing the aura within.

the

seed that fabricates a bed with

alluring comfort

  noise of nature’s creatures

resting in heat

Venting the silence within.

the

seed that grows the blades with

natures taste

   herbs tasting the air with

Green fibres dancing in the wind

Liberating the flavour within.

Above the ground comes

man who walks the blades with

A blinded sight

  people who watch nature’s life

demolish day and night

Inhaling the fuel within.

Underneath the ground

   comes 

the seed of life.

[husniyan-blog]

 The Haitian Boy.

    The Haitian boy once visited North America to become something big. He wanted to create an invention that would change lives. It was the 1950’s and he didn’t want to expose his plans. He lived quite the personal life. One day he woke up on a hot, summer day and came up with a plan. He created a blueprint and began building a masterpiece with discrete components. Using small pieces of material, he spent day and night creating. Three weeks later at noon, the Haitian boy created what was called the “Integrated Circuit.” This electronic circuit is what could change lives but he didn’t want to reveal his masterpiece. So, he hd his blueprints and invention from the public to keep them covert. The Haitian boy kept the plans safe in a cupboard with a lock that was almost impossible to open. Until one day, in 1958, the same invention had been released and the Haitian boy remained small.

[husniyan-blog]

The Glacier Love is as deep as the ocean, as shallow as the shore Crushing on him since 1994 I approached him wanting more Poured out my heart in sweet galore. His eyes as cold as ice The empty glare that cannot suffice It hit me twice That his love is not my paradise. But yet again, When the ocean freezes His cold heart releases The beats that broke me into pieces.

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