ihatejalph

[ihatejalph]

Some more LOTF headcanons cuz I'm hilarious

Piggy is super clumsy with his glasses, goes through about three pairs a year and cries every time they break

Jack and Ralph are sat next to eachother in every class because the teachers find it hilarious

Simon is dyslexic, gets berated by his father over it CONSTANTLY

Jack DESPISES being in choir, but enjoys being able to scream loud so he stays

Roger has like five sisters, he's the middle child (I relate twin💔)

Sam And Eric had this phase where they tried as HARD as possible to be different, but they eventually gave up

Jack is INSANELY chronically online, and he watches those sigma looksmaxxing videos💔

Roger is the type of guy to ask you to name five songs if you wear a band shirt

[ihatejalph]

NOT ME!!!

Are people in jail allowed to free other people in jail lotf warden?

🚓: Yes 👍 but only because pretty much everyone is in jail at this point

[ihatejalph]

PREACH TWIN

I haven’t platonicposted in a while

[ihatejalph]

THERES A GIRL INFRONT OF ME SCROLLING ON TUMBLR SHOULD I SAY THE THING

[ihatejalph]

Btw if you don't agree with any of my opinions PLEASE just block me, I don't like getting involved in drama especially online. Please don't reblog or comment on my posts if you don't agree with them

[ihatejalph]

What is going ON in the loft fandom? Remind me to never join a fandom with primarily children characters again because what....

[ihatejalph]

LOTF modern HCS!

Jack unironically uses soyjacks, actually finds them HILARIOUS

Simon is a year younger then all the boys and HATES it because he's not in any of the same classes as them

Piggy is AMAZING at telling stories, but Roger usually steals the scary ones and uses them to scare first years (aka Year sevens)

Ralph has the most LUSCIOUS hair ever, he uses literally body wash to clean his hair and somehow it's always shiny and fluffy

Jack has HORRIFIC acne, punched Simon once over it because Simon called him "Pizza face"

Ralph keeps making class groupchats which always get overran by the choir boys because somehow Roger figured out how to make himself admin, they all get renamed to something HORRIFIC

Simon was made the student librarian and skips class constantly to cause some shenanigans in the library with Simon and Roger

Jack, Roger and Maurice got the bathrooms shut down for a week because they were vaping 💔

Jack used to be the BIGGEST wannabe class clown, but really he realised he was the best at being rude to people so he continued doing that

[ihatejalph]

random lotf modern/gen z au hcs

jack unironically speaks in brainrot. he's snivelling after getting emotional in an argument telling himself to 'lock in' out loud

when there's a bug in the classroom everyone either looks to simon or roger to get rid of it. but when this happens during choir practice the boys ALWAYS go to simon because roger cups the insect in his palms and chases the boys with it. he WILL drop it on you if you've pissed him off enough today (legend has it that's how jack sang his first c sharp)

simon wears the most HIDEOUS fits its insane. a stressed english teacher saw his 'sonc the hodge' t-shirt after a long day and proceeded to have a nervous breakdown

some underpaid teacher made roger a prefect and he tortures the year 7s by making them hit the griddy if they look at him wrong

piggy has an alt instagram account impersonating a grandma which he uses to stalk his opps

the school had to block the students from searching basically anything but the school site and wikipedia because the choir boys kept playing bootleg fnaf and crashing the computers

every time piggy talks to someone from his year on instagram their first conversation is always 'omg you used to be sooooooo irritating in year 7....like seriously NO ONE liked you...' and every time he has to take a deep breath and try not to blow them up with his mind

bootleg fnaf was actually the first thing to be banned by the school because jack kept telling the year 7s that pissed him off that freddy fazbear was real and that he would appear in their dorms if they didnt listen to him and they ALL fucking believed him. jack wasn't even trying particularly hard to lie he was just sick of them trying to jumpscare him

jack and roger cannot hang out with piggy simon and ralph in public and this is ONLY because the school photographer finds them every time. they are the happy diverse friendship group on the latest three issues and counting of the school brochure

[ihatejalph]

I wanna make HCS about the boys (TLOF) in an Irish school but nobody would understand my slang 💔💔

[ihatejalph]

The reason I dislike JALPH is probably from my own personal experiences, because in my opinion the way their friendship ends is SO much more heart breaking and I feel like shipping them together strips away some of that, idk I worded this a bit shittily. Just my opinion though 🤑

[ihatejalph]

[ihatejalph]

hello i am a Jalph fan and i support this blog. jalphers for anti-jalph nation ✊

I DECLINE

[ihatejalph]

reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

[ihatejalph]

jager in graphic novel i heart jager jagegrhager hagegr yes rogr and jak

[ihatejalph]

Made a flag for my people... What do we think

[ihatejalph]

This is the lucky clover cat. reblog this in 30 seconds & he will bring u good luck and fortune.

[ihatejalph]

Low honor at four bro what are they feeding you