illusionoftheliving

[illusionoftheliving]

reading poetry forces you to ask wrenching, necessary, impossible questions, like "is the author stupid? or am I?"

[illusionoftheliving]

This is on the Dragonborn's fridge

[illusionoftheliving]

it's annoying that video games disable achievements when you install mods. i DID kill alduin who cares if thomas the tank engine was there

[illusionoftheliving]

A spoon's only objective in life is to make soup go upwards, and it knows this. That's why when you put one under a running tap it blasts the water way high. The spoon thinks there's suddenly TONS of soup to deal with and it freaks out.

[illusionoftheliving]

[illusionoftheliving]

an ornithologist pointed a microphone at a bird sitting alone on a wire and caught the sound of the bird singing a song at a decibel so low that it would be impossible for another bird to hear it, meaning the bird was singing quietly to itself I love life

[illusionoftheliving]

Think you could take a 10x10 inch cock? Asking for a friend 👀

like is it a cube or am i misunderstanding

[illusionoftheliving]

i always click the "track package" button as soon as i get the email. "oh boy i wonder where my package is!" warehouse.

[illusionoftheliving]

i think as adults it’s our responsibility to be nice to kids and treat them with the respect we wish we got at that age and im not kidding or exaggerating in the least

[illusionoftheliving]

just got back into gardening so i’ve forgotten. are basil leaves supposed to be this big

[illusionoftheliving]

[illusionoftheliving]

Straight guys who use tumblr are the funniest people ever literally how did you end up here

[illusionoftheliving]

[illusionoftheliving]

my top hobbies are shame and embarrassment but i also occasionally dabble in envy

[illusionoftheliving]

[illusionoftheliving]

[illusionoftheliving]

The bird whisperer

(via)