im-totally-not-an-alien-2 - Tumblr blog

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

...well now I need an au where is his parents doing this with shape-shifting tech they made. Or they're just running around Gotham in the GAV and evading the bats, not because they're always two steps ahead thanks to thier "strategic minds" But because they're so chaotic nobody knows what they're going to do next

Bad things tended to happen when Danny was bored. Mainly because he has the most insane bad ideas known to man, like trying to steal Scarecrows Fear Toxin to compare it to fright knights sword.

In his defense, FN was being a bit uppity about how his sword was sooo superior to anything humans could ever make while Danny insisted human invention could do anything magic could do.

Needless to say Danny quickly bites off more than he can chew when he uses his new shape-shifting powers to turn into Scarecrow and enter his hideout and grabs the newest version of the formula and several doses of fear toxin.

Danny hadn't actually planned on being attacked by the bats though.

Arkham sucked and Danny escaped from there as soon as the bats were out of sight and reclaimed his stolen goods from the evidence lockers on his way out.

Emboldened by his questionably successful hiest, he continues to do the same thing with various other Gotham rogues and steals thier stuff so he can figue out how it works and play with it, much to the bats confusion and the criminals ire.

This is going to blow up in Danny's face spectacularly :)

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Bad things tended to happen when Danny was bored. Mainly because he has the most insane bad ideas known to man, like trying to steal Scarecrows Fear Toxin to compare it to fright knights sword.

In his defense, FN was being a bit uppity about how his sword was sooo superior to anything humans could ever make while Danny insisted human invention could do anything magic could do.

Needless to say Danny quickly bites off more than he can chew when he uses his new shape-shifting powers to turn into Scarecrow and enter his hideout and grabs the newest version of the formula and several doses of fear toxin.

Danny hadn't actually planned on being attacked by the bats though.

Arkham sucked and Danny escaped from there as soon as the bats were out of sight and reclaimed his stolen goods from the evidence lockers on his way out.

Emboldened by his questionably successful hiest, he continues to do the same thing with various other Gotham rogues and steals thier stuff so he can figue out how it works and play with it, much to the bats confusion and the criminals ire.

This is going to blow up in Danny's face spectacularly :)

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

"How come there's no multi-war chess?"

Tim looked up at the entity that had been haunting him for the past few weeks now, "What does that even mean?"

"You know how chess is basically a game about two kingdoms going to war with eachother?" The being asked, his white gloves gesturing about lazily, "well wouldn't it make sense for chess competitions to make the players go into the next round with only the pieces that "survived" the last war? It would be more interesting."

Danny smirked as he watched Mr. Drakes mind whirring at all the new strategies and potential. Comforted in the knowledge that Mr. Drake wasn't going to get much paperwork done tonight, let alone have time to work on his project for the competition, Danny let himself vanish from the other boys office.

All he needed to do was keep distracting Tim from the competition and that prize was all Tuckers.

He just prayed Sam didn't find out he was doing this or that he was getting chased around by bats every other night or else she'd kill him the rest of the way

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny crawled down the aisle of the GAV, his stomach churning with every sharp turn and honest to ancients barrel rolls his parents suped up war car was doing while speeding down Gothams city streets.

He didn't think it was possible for anyone to be a worse driver than his dad, but it turned out the GAVs own Ai was powered by ectoplasm.

Who would have thought ectoplasm could be affected by Scarecrows Fear Toxin? Not Danny.

So now here he is, lying on the floor of his parents' car as its firing missiles and lazers, and the Bats are trying to beat it up.

The GAVs ring tone suddenly rang through the air, and Danny had never been so grateful to hear a Katty Perry song in his life. Hoping it was his mom calling so he would be rescued from this nightmare, he yelled out, "Answer!"

"Hello," an unfamiliar robotic voice chimed in from the speakers. Okay, so not his mom.

"Hello." He replied without thinking, his Midwestern hospitality kicking in despite no one actually being in here with him. "How can I help you?"

"Are you able to stop the machine?" Oh, so it's straight to business. Danny could respect that. "No. All the controls are on the fritz. But I think I know what caused this." He didn't give her a chance to respond before he continued, "There was a leak in the fuel line under the GAV. All my parents' tech runs on ectoplasm, which is sensitive to emotions."

"The fear toxin." The voice was still mechanical but held an undercurrent of realization, "You're a meta," the voice stated, though Danny had no idea how they knew. Scratch that. He had used his powers in Gotham a few times already. Guess the bats really do see everything, huh. "Can't you use your density sifting ability to get under the vehicle and fly underneath to repair the damage? I've seen you work on your parents' weapons before."

Danny laughed mirthlessly, "No, the GAV is specifically designed to have energy shields that I can't pass through. Besides,the problem isn't actually the leak. It's the fear. If you could force a new emotion into the ectoplasm, it might override the fear, and while I have many abilities, the Care Bear Stare isn't one of them."

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny was livid.

The Guys In White had been following Phantom around constantly and while they weren't much of a threat, they were a massive nuisance. They had shot him down on Thursday and caused him to crash into some poor kids birthday cake in the park.

On Friday they had accidentally released ghost rats into the school.

On Saturday they had somehow managed to turn Paulinas hair ectoplasm green. She refused to leave her bedroom until it was reversed

On Sunday they tried to commandeer his parents GAV and earned the ire of his mom. They found out exactly why that was a bad idea.

On Monday they bardged into Danny's classroom, interrupting his math test because they were looking for a ghost parrot. It was mostly harmless but kept insulting them in a cheery tone. Danny decided he liked that bird.

We won't speak about what happened on Tuesday.

On Wednesday, he scowled at an agent that had accidentally blasted him and his friends with liquid ectoplasm while they were sitting and eating lunch. It was then that Danny began plotting his revenge.

That night he when ghost and lead the GIW on a while goose chase. Did danny take them across state lines? Yes. Did he manage to pull a massive following of these creeps? Also yes.

Did he plan for his target-the guy he had been leading them to- to already be in cuffs when he arrived in Gotham? No. Not at all.

"Hey, uh..." the words died on his tongue as Batman- The Batman- turned to him with narrowed eyes. Mustering his will, he started again, "Could you let him out? Just for a little bit?"

"No."

"Aw, Cmon!"

Condiment King began raving about something, but Danny didn't particularly care to pay attention. "If you're not going to let him out, then can you at least call the rest of the paw patrol? I wanna ask if they wanna throw mud at evil secret organization people. For enrichment." Danny gave his best, most cheeky smile for extra measure.

"Hn."

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

At a Wayne family dinner

DICK: You don't have to hide your powers here

Danny: I'm not trying to hide them, I'm trying to control them

Duke: Wait, I thought you got intangibility two years ago?

Danny: Yeah. It was a lot worse back then. High school is bad enough without your clothes falling off

Tim: *spits out his drink*

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

I didn't even think about this. I'm now salty I didn't get Isakaied.

Then again who would take care of my cat?

Good News: I can now honestly say I've survived being hit by a truck.

Bad News: I am very sore

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Good News: I can now honestly say I've survived being hit by a truck.

Bad News: I am very sore

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Stephanie had hit the jackpot. She had been heading back to base to get cleaned up after a fight with Condiment King, grumbling all the while. She stopped on a rooftop after some mayo from her hair had fallen into her face.

Suddenly, there was no mayo. All of the condiments that she was covered with were now on the rooftop around her feet. She didn't even see this kid approach. "Huh?" She said without thinking

"Sorry." The kid, who looked like adoption bait smiled sheepishly as he used the hand that had density shifted the food off of her to rub the back of his neck. "I thought you would like that stuff off of you."

Somehow she convinced him to help her with the aftermath of fighting messy villains in exchange for snacks, but in a move of petty revenge she refused to tell the other bats how she managed to get clean so fast and not smell like mustard for a week after.

This, of course, leads to the whole bat clan attempting to stalk her to figure out her secret.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Bruce knew immediately that it wasn't his son. Even if the glowing neon green eyes weren't a dead giveaway, Tim would never move like that. He was clumsy and uncoordinated in a way a normal teen would be, not at all like the trained fighter that he actually was.

Next was the voice. It was nothing like Tim's, and Bruce was surprised that whoever this kid was - because that definitely sounded like a kid - actually thought anyone would be fooled by this. Oh well, he wanted info and wanted to make this kid squirm a bit as punishment, so why not bring out Brucie baby and tease him a little?

"Tim dear, why are you still in the office? I thought I told you to go to bed early tonight! You're going to pass out again!"

The kid wearing Tim's face looked alarmed for a bit. Once Bruce had mentioned passing out and he took the opportunity to shuffle the kid towards the door while his guard was down.

"Wait! I need to get-"

"Whatever it is," Bruce interrupted, "It can wait till tomorrow."

The kid slumped a bit and pouted, but otherwise made no attempts of escaping as Bruce led the fake Drake to the elevator, however the moment they got into the car "Tim" blacked out in the passenger seat and didn't wake up for three hours. All tests showed that this was the real Tim, so what was happening?

Tim awoke with a gasp on a couch in the manor.

"Tim," Bruce began, already getting up from his place in the nearby armchair, but before he could speak, Tim croaked out, "Possessed"

"What?"

"Possession. He was after the device that was powered by the unidentified green substance we found."

Aka Danny tries to steal back his parents' dangerous stuff only to be stopped at the last minute.

Repeatedly.

Danny doesn't even know what half this stuff does, but he's not too keep on finding out, thus trying to get them away from the humans

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Omg this is so good! I was captivated from start to finish!

Evil Tim

@im-totally-not-an-alien-2 inspired from this prompt (here)

[Tags: Assassination, Evil Clone Tim, Danny trauma bonding to his parents' murderer, Jazz in control, Jazz in distress, trauma, hiding of bodies, brain dead but with clone Tim, liminal Jazz, liminal clone Tim, bad parents Fenton, vivisection AU]

Part One

Though he was called Tim and was rather possessive of the name, he was not in fact the original Tim. Not the Timothy Drake who was also Red Robin and all that it entailed. His original intention, or more accurately the purpose he was created for was to kill his Original and take his place. A perfect replica without any of the pesky rebellion and independence that came with being a Real Person. The farther he traveled away from his place of creation the less he wanted to actually complete the mission however; his distaste for his Original let alone the self-centered fools he surrounded himself with was so palpable he could practically taste it in the back of his throat.

Alas, there was no way out of the wretched thing unless he wanted to melt in three months.  The whole situation left him with a foul temper and a bad taste in his mouth. Things got worse for him however when the most bizarre occurrence possible happened to him. He was not even fully sure what had happened as his vision filled with green and he found himself in some dark parody of what he could only compare to a fucked up version of Wonderland. A somewhat worthless memory to have had downloaded into his memory banks until that very moment it seemed.

The place was an expanse of green nebulas and clouds in seas of endless purple and black void with floating islands and doors in various colors, sizes, and types. No two doors looked the same, neither did any island look like any other he saw as he floated uncontrolled in the lazarus green abyss. Whatever was in the air, if there even was any air, burned his lungs and sat on his skin like a thin and grotesque film. Occasionally in the distance he would spot things vaguely humanoid and creatures decidedly not. Tim thought he may be trapped in the warped dream for the rest of his days, if any days were even passing in that place.

However, he at last noticed that in the path of his uncontrollable floating a large green swirling mass sat fixed in place. It looked very much like a pool of thick green lazarus water in a vertical circle, propped much like a mirror would be but with no reflection to show. It looked like a bigger version of the strange magic that brought him to that place in the first place, the odd portal that had just opened in one breath and he had tripped into before it closed on the second breath. He could not know if it would work the same and simply drop him off where he started, drop him in a place completely unsurvivable, or just tear him apart the moment he crossed it.

With no control Tim couldn’t exactly dodge the massive green portal so he instead had to surrender himself to the inevitable and simply let himself float into it. It was only a single breath, that suspended moment between the inhale and exhale, and gravity had reclaimed a firm hold on him, dropping him to a cold tile floor. Disoriented and angry he quickly stumbled to his feet, shouting met his ears almost instantly as the people already in the room seemed to hear him, their attention drawn immediately. It took only seconds for the assassin to take in his surroundings and arm himself with his hidden daggers.

“Ghost! Quick Jack! Before it frees the Phantom menace!” A feminine voice commanded firmly.

“On it Madds!” The massive, brutish man was quick to obey the command of the woman in teal spandex.

Tim did not bother to say anything as he wasted no time to slip his blades between the ribs of the massive man in the orange jumpsuit and directly into his lungs. He went down fast and hard, the woman shrieked for ‘Jack’ and managed to procure some sort of energy gun from somewhere to shoot him. She was hysterical with her partner down and her shooting erratic enough that it was laughably easy to kill her next. The spandex or latex, whatever the material was, did not protect her from his knives as they punctured through her throat and kidney. It was far too easy and far too fast, hardly anything more than just annoying to deal with the first thing back into reality.

Tim’s attention was immediately drawn from the bodies and to the table as a weak thrashing and wailing grabbed him. He went over to inspect whatever they had been doing before he arrived and was somewhat shocked to see that they were in the beginning stages of vivisecting what appeared to be a young teen about his own age, though perhaps slightly younger given his small size and delicate features.

The first thing Tim noticed about him was the wide and luminous green eyes. They were filled with clear almost sparkling tears that streamed down his soft, slightly pale icy blue face. He had glowing white freckles scattered across his nose and cheeks like a galaxy reflected on the ocean. His hair was short and obeyed no laws of physics or gravity, a pale and luminous white that could only be compared to liquid starlight. His ears were just slightly pointed, his teeth sharp and clearly meant for a predator. Tim had never seen a creature so beautiful, for a moment he believed this being could only be a faerie captured and held captive by unworthy mortals jealous of his existence.

“Please…help…” The boy begged him and Tim could only obey and suppress whatever odd twinge this creature had invoked inside him at the words, the sound of his slightly echoing voice teasing at his mind.

Tim did not bother to keep the shackles intact as he used the hilts of his daggers to simply break them apart. The boy curled in on himself and sobbed in despair drawing Tim’s eye to the thick and clearly technological collar on his thin and fragile looking neck. He touched it gently, the boy only flinched but did not lash out at him despite him so easily touching such a vulnerable place. They were trusting, good, he could use that. He noticed that it would need some sort of key and he walked over to the bodies and sifted through the pockets of the man’s uniform as he was the only one with pockets at all. Luckily the fools had actually kept the key on them and he easily freed the boy from his collar.

With the collar removed the creature shifted forms in a short flash of light. He looked almost no different than before, his colors simply inverted to appear more human and his teeth appearing more omnivorous than carnivorous as before. Looking at him again his skin was a sweet pale peach color with a smattering of brown freckles, his hair an inky black that almost swallowed the light around them, and his eyes were the most beautiful blue Tim had ever seen. Incomparable to anything else in the world, even disguised as a human Tim was certain he had never seen a being so beautiful nor would he ever see their equal again.

Once free the boy shocked him by hugging him tightly and sobbing into his armor. Tim was uncertain what to do and so stood stiffly while they cried. He was sure it would have gone longer if not for the weak sound of someone else’s voice calling out. The boy startled and immediately jumped from his vivisection table and stumbled his way towards what looked horrifyingly like an iron maiden. The iron maiden was much bigger than any should reasonably be which was unbearably lucky for whatever unfortunate soul had been trapped inside. Tim quickly moved over to help the boy free whoever was inside as he suspected they were an alley forcibly contained to ensure the scientists’  wretched work was not interrupted.

They opened the iron maiden and a young woman stumbled out. She was absurdly tall and though muscled appeared more reedy than musclebound. She had long bright orange hair held back by a blue headband to match her blue eyes. She too had freckles and pale peach skin, though she had similarities in facial structure to the boy she was not as delicately beautiful as him. Though she was a different kind of beautiful. She was clearly injured in a few places not even counting the evenly spaced shallow punctures in her body and the cuts on either side of her face. She burst into tears the moment she saw the boy and embraced him tightly, the two of them collapsing to the tiled floors in a tight hug and overwhelmed, anguished tears.

Tim was sure that these two were family of some kind, they looked related and seemed extremely attached to one another at least. Tim turned away from them to give them a moment of privacy. The location they were in seemed rather advanced, if bulky in structure with strange machines and torture devices he could not begin to parse out the use of. The siblings seemed to finally pull themselves together only a few minutes later as Tim perused the laboratory and approached him. They still clung tightly to each other, as though afraid the other might disappear if they let go for a moment.

“Thank you for saving us but…you’re not a ghost? How did you get here?” The boy asked, clearly somewhat hesitant. Tim only briefly considered lying, but there was simply no point in doing so given the two were likely not human and the swirling open portal not ten feet from them.

“I fell into a strange green portal and floated around a strange green abyss for a while before just passing through that portal and falling into this place.” Tim told them straightforwardly. The girl frowned a little severely.

“That seems a bit convenient given your timing…” The girl couldn’t help but remark, the boy seemed to perk up at the observation, however his expression gained some life and brightness.

“It is! That’s perfect timing Jazz!” The boy had seemed to understand some sort of meaning that was beyond Tim’s, but the girl seemed torn between understanding and suspicion. The boy however threw all caution to the wind. “Hi, I’m Danny Fenton, er Phantom. This is my big sister Jazz, what’s your name?”

“...You may call me Tim.” He found himself saying before he could really think better of it.

“Lovely to meet you Tim. Though…the circumstances could be better.” Jazz could not help but to allow her eyes to drift to the pair of scientists' bodies. Her gaze was pained, resentful, and longing.

“We should…we should clean up…” Danny spoke softly but refused to even look in the direction of their bodies.

“Perhaps you should allow me to take care of it.” Tim offered pragmatically. More for his own benefit than the benefit of the siblings. After all, it would not do well to leave evidence of any kind simply lying around and both siblings seemed in far too fragile a mental state to make good decisions.

“But you-you already did…we can’t ask you to…We don’t even know what to do…” Danny protested but his protests seemed to die as his mind tried to catch up again to what situation they found themselves in.

“...We can’t just throw them into the portal, they might come back if we do.” Jazz spoke up softly. “We can’t call the police either. The GIW would swarm this place the second they know our parents are dead. They’ll strip all the tech and endanger everyone. We…we need time. Time to get their patents in our names and make sure that we can’t be taken by the government.”

“What do we do? We can’t let the GIW have anything here, they’ll destabilize the whole universe.” Danny voiced his own distress causing Tim quite a bit of alarm.

“...We destroy it. We destroy as many of their blueprints as we can, hide the bodies until I get emancipated, and transfer everything to my name. We can’t let Vlad catch on until it’s done or he’ll become a hindrance as well…” Jazz paced as she worked through her thoughts.

“...Can we even do this?” Danny asked, distressed.

“It doesn’t matter if we can, we will. The GIW and Vlad can’t be allowed to get their greedy hands on anything of our parents or everyone will be in danger. If we have to dismantle the portal to keep it out of their hands we will, but only as a last resort.” Jazz paused in front of the bodies again. “We…we need to hide them first…We’ll tell everyone that they went on a ghost hunting trip. That they’ll be back in a few months…That should give me enough time to file all the paperwork. Maybe Tucker can help us keep it all under the radar so no one knows until it’s too late.”

“Where would we hide them? We can’t take them to the Realms, they might revive…If we hide them in the woods or something it’s only a matter of time until someone or something finds them.” Danny voiced his own distress.

Tim cleared his throat to gain their attention, “As I offered before; I can take care of the bodies. No one will find them and you’ll have as much time as you need until someone reports them missing. I would like to know more about this GIW and Vlad in exchange however.”

The two siblings looked at each other in some distress. Danny at least seemed more agreeable even if his sister still seemed inclined to refuse him. Danny offered Tim a sad but thankful smile and nodded, though Jazz looked very uneasy.

“Thank you Tim…You can stay with us until we find out how to get you home if you like. I know those portals kind of just dump you wherever and it’s pretty distressing. You also had to do…to do that…” Danny spoke softly, “I’m sorry we’ve been causing you so much trouble.” “It is no trouble for me; I am trained in infiltration and rescue.” Tim was not exactly lying, he was trained to replace a vigilante after all. The stars that appeared in Danny’s eyes at this information however had Tim quite certain it was well worth the exaggeration.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

I made a new blog for dragon quest stuff if you're interested in that. Guess what I named it? >:D

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

hello there

i am here to remind you

about the cheddar cheeeeseeeeeeee

I don't really have any cheddar in my apartment rn. I have Gouda and Colby Jack, though, if you'd like me to make a grilled cheese???

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

HOW DID THIS GET 10,000 NOTES?!?!?!!

Danny gets adopted by Bruce Wayne au but consider: Danny was brought up in a loving-if absolutely insane- household where pda and mushy gushy stuff wasn't only said, but expected.

The bats almost never voice thier love for one another, instead showing it in a variety of different ways.

What I'm saying is that Danny keeps nearly killing them by saying "I love you." I'm not even joking. Danny has nearly offed the bats more times in his week staying in wayne manor than any Gotham villian would dare try

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

I was going for "hat comically expands due to cartoon logic" but I like this too. Love the misunderstandings this one could create

Danny: Hey guys! Wanna see me pull a rabit out of a hat?

Tucker: I mean, sure I guess

Sam: No, that's lame and overdone. Get me a pet bat.

Danny: One bat coming up!

Danny: *pulls Batman halfway out of the tophat*

Danny:

Tucker:

Sam:

Batman: *scowling*

Tucker: *hastily whispering* Shove him back in! Shove him back in!

Danny: *shoves Batman back in*

Danny:

Tucker:

Sam:

Tucker: Are we going to get in trouble for this or...?

-Meanwhile, at the batcave-

Tim: *witnessing Batman get pulled halfway into a portal* WTF?!

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny: Hey guys! Wanna see me pull a rabit out of a hat?

Tucker: I mean, sure I guess

Sam: No, that's lame and overdone. Get me a pet bat.

Danny: One bat coming up!

Danny: *pulls Batman halfway out of the tophat*

Danny:

Tucker:

Sam:

Batman: *scowling*

Tucker: *hastily whispering* Shove him back in! Shove him back in!

Danny: *shoves Batman back in*

Danny:

Tucker:

Sam:

Tucker: Are we going to get in trouble for this or...?

-Meanwhile, at the batcave-

Tim: *witnessing Batman get pulled halfway into a portal* WTF?!

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny was enjoying himself. His new haunt was suprisingly spacious and came with lots of charges who needed protection and care.

The old butler guy, Alfred, seemed to at least have an idea of what was going on. He had been making extra food lately and leaving it out for Danny to eat in a secluded area. Danny always made sure to turn the plate invisible and sneak it back to his hidden passage panic room before he started eating.

In return, Danny made sure to do lots of chores around the manor. Intangibility and wind manipulation made dusting super easy if you knew how to use it right.

Danny also took his job as a guardian spirit seriously. He overheard the bats fighting about not wanting to be coddled on patrol and decided it was best to let them handle themselves outside of the manor. Danny himself hated when people stuck thier noses into his business.

Jazz had screwed him over countless times with her good intentions.

But the manor was different. This was his new haunt after his old one kicked him out. This family had invited him in whether they knew it or not. Also, since the Fentons and GIW don't exist in this world, they'd have a hell of a time kicking him out.

It's best not to let it come to that. So Danny had to make these people love him the way Amity Park never did.

The Wayne's however are rather dense. You would think them being the worlds greatest detectives would mean something, but they kept silently blaming each other for things happening around the manor until they couldn't.

A book being put away when they were done with it or their messes being cleaned up when they came back into a room could be easily explained by how many people lived there. The family entering the dining room, discussing what they were going to order for dinner since Alfred was gone for a week only to find a full meal waiting for them on the diner table? They couldn't brush that off.

None of them could cook.