incorrect-splintered-quotes

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Someone teaching Morpheus to drive: So you're driving down a road and you see Jeb and Alyssa on the road. What do you hit?

Morpheus: I'd hit Jeb. I could never hurt Alyssa

Person teaching him to drive: [massaging thier temples] The brakes, you hit the brakes.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus: I assure you I am the most attractive person in this room.

Alyssa: [enters the room]

Morpheus: Nevermind.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Alyssa: Why do you have to be so tall?!

Morpheus: Would you prefer me on my knees?

Alyssa: What.

Mopheus: What.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Alyssa: Why are you throwing stones at my window. What do you have a phone for if you're chucking rocks?

Morpheus as M: Oh, you're right, I'm sorry.

Alyssa: ...Did you just throw your phone at my window

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus about Jeb: Do you know how hard it is to play mind games with someone who has no brains?

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus: That'd go against my moral compass.

Alyssa: Your moral compass is a roulette wheel, Morpheus

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Jeb mocking Morpheus: I don’t buy the ‘everyone is doing their best’ theory. I know firsthand that I’m not.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Alyssa: If you had to separate your dog from 49 other identical dogs that were all equally excited to see you, how would you determine which dog was yours?

Jen: I would take my 50 dogs home and live like a king

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Jeb: Small talk is for losers. Rate your current level of existential dread from 1 to 10.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Jeb: I often want to drown my troubles. But I can’t get Morpheus to go swimming

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Jeb: If a demon possessed me, I'd just say oh cool take it from here and good luck

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus: well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Jeb: The sky is beautiful

Morpheus: you know what else is beautiful?

Both: Alyssa

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus: My secret is making the wrong choices,but committing completely.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus: The fact that my eyes don't glow when I'm at my strongest is unacceptable and not on brand.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Jeb: If you jumped from Morpheus’ ego down to his IQ level, you’d die.

[incorrect-splintered-quotes]

Morpheus: “Ladies and gentlemen” is unnecessarily gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly I’m falling asleep already.

Morpheus: “Cowards”, on the other hand, is inclusive to all genders, casual and fun, short and to the point, exciting, and dramatic.