incorrect-x

[incorrect-x]

shira: how did you manage to fuck up so many things in a single day?

natsu: i got up early

[incorrect-x]

[3AM]

aurora: why are any of us here, really?

zoo security guard: i’m asking about you, specifically

[incorrect-x]

[texting]

noah: guess you’ll have to send me hot texts tonight

cody: if i had 8 limbs like an octopus, i’d touch you with all of them

noah: ok try again

[incorrect-x]

satan: i can’t do that, it goes against my moral compass

levi: satan, your moral compass is a fucking roulette wheel

[incorrect-x]

denki: when are you free?

katsuki: i’m forever imprisoned in my own personal hell so i’m never truly “free,” but i don’t really have plans next week except for monday.

[incorrect-x]

verity: treat spiders the way you want to be treated

shira: killed without hesitation

verity: no

[incorrect-x]

kokichi, brushing his teeth: papa, why don’t we have to brush our other bones?

leon: because they’re inside of us and don’t need it like our teeth do

kokichi: i want to brush my bones

leon:

kokichi: i want to brush my bones dad

leon: please.. please stop saying that

[incorrect-x]

ibuki: life’s too short to worry, listen to your heart!

hajime: my heart says to overthrow the government while wearing pringles cans on my arms and chanting bohemian rhapsody backwards, so i’d rather not

ibuki: okay but why not

[incorrect-x]

[texting]

yachi: i need relationship advice

tsukki: break up

yachi: at least listen to me first

[incorrect-x]

therapist: okay, for this next exercise, i’m going to need you to get in touch with your feelings

gajeel, dissociating since he was 11: i’m gonna need to get in touch with my what now?

[incorrect-x]

mondo: i am not out of control! i’m a law-abiding citizen!

taka: really? name one law

mondo: [pause] don’t kill people?

taka: that’s on me. i set the bar too low.

[incorrect-x]

[minecraft]

yuu: hrngh

yuu: soup

yuu tried to swim in lava

[incorrect-x]

asmodeus: there’s no such thing as straight men.

asmodeus: just men who haven’t met me.

[incorrect-x]

cody: is masturbating while smoking weed called masturblazing?

geoff: no man, it’s called highjacking

trent: guys, no, it’s called weedwhacking

noah: no, it’s called disappointing your mother

[incorrect-x]

[after a fight]

tsukasa: i’m sorry.

michi: [sitting in a blanket fort]

tsukasa: forgive me?

michi: just get in the fucking fort

[incorrect-x]

cami: is there no way to expel mephisto?

diavolo: not without cause.

cami: well then, i have cause. it’s because i hate him

[incorrect-x]

[levi and mammon sitting on a bench]

satan: what’s wrong with you two?

levi: sit down with us so we can tell you

satan: [sits down]

mammon: the bench is freshly painted

satan: