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*arguing*

Brendon: I’m taller

Patrick: Yeah, well I’m cuter

Brendon: That’s not even-

Patrick: People prefer dogs not giraffe

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Oh my god i forgot I ran out of queues! sorry for not updating, I'll find more quotes and brentrick contents to post!

(in the mean time, feel free to submit your own quotes!)

((and happy 2020!!!))

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*texting*

Brendon: Why are you on Tinder?

Patrick: My boyfriend died a couple years ago. I'm trying to get back in the dating game

Brendon: Oh that's sad.

Brendon: On our first date, we should get a Quija board and contact your boyfriend so I can get permission to smash.

Patrick: What the fuck is wrong with you

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Patrick: I can't fucking stand you!

Brendon: You don't have to stand, my lap is right here!

Patrick:

Patrick: *sits on his lap* Seriously though, fuck you

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Patrick: You have no idea what I'm capable of.

Brendon: Don't take it personally, but I feel like I'm being threatened by a cupcake.

[later]

Brendon: You're the scariest cupcake I've ever seen. I'm terrified.

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Brendon, jealous: That guy wanted to buy you a drink.

Patrick: Really? But I already have a drink.

Patrick: Do you think he'd buy me mozzarella sticks instead?

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Brendon: We can make this work! We're Romeo and Juliet!

Patrick: It didn't work for Romeo and Juliet. That play ends in a tragic double suicide.

Brendon: That's how it ends? Why do people like it so much?

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Brendon: Well, you know what they say about guys with big feet.

Patrick: No, what?

Pete, glaring at Brendon from across the room:

Brendon: T- They'd say, "damn! Those are some big feet!"

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Patrick: Be careful, babe.

Brendon: You called me babe! No take-backs!

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Patrick: Did you tell anyone we're dating?

Brendon: Yes, Patrick, I have no self control and I told everyone that we're dating.

Patrick: Okay, no need for sarcasm.

Brendon: No, seriously, I have no self control and I told everyone we're dating.

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Patrick: Brendon, you didn't have to kidnap me just for a birthday party.

Brendon: Kidnapping is what you do to children. You're thirty-four. I abducted you.

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Joe: Wait, so Brendon kissed you and you said "thank you"?

Patrick: Yes.

Joe: Well, that was very polite.

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Dan: Hey, Brendon? Can I get some dating advice?

Brendon: Just because I'm with Patrick doesn't mean I know how I did it.

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Brendon: It was like taking candy from a baby.

Patrick: Why are you giving candy to a baby in the first place?

Patrick: Don't give candy to a baby!

Patrick: They can't brush their teeth!

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Patrick: Being short is really hard

Patrick: because even when I'm angry, Brendon just kinda giggles at me and says "aww you're so cute when you're angry"

Patrick: like, no. Stop. Recognize my power.

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Patrick: Brendon says I'm "cute af", which I assume stands for "and fun".

Pete: Aww, it doesn't.

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Patrick: Please? For me?

Brendon: Don't do that.

Patrick: What?

Brendon: You think every time you say "please? for me?" I'll do whatever you want. Well, not this time.

Patrick:

Patrick: Please? For me?

Brendon: ...okay.