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I have to say I only got a C from my ESL class in highschool and being a total introvert has made me have alot of difficulties in expressing words. And now with the current situation, I don't know what to do anymore. I'm sorry that I have to use this space to scream.

What I want to say is that it really pains me to see that many countries now believe that my country Thailand attacked first, just because of their constant repetitive social postings that they are "weaker and smaller" country and that they would never attack first. We tried to be patient with them by using only defensive measures, but they started to cross the line, from trespassing and burying landmines in our land to firing at the civilian area and hospitals.

It's like a little kid hitting an older kid with a bat and when the older kid tried to push the little kid away to stop them, they just ran to an adult to say the older kid pushed them over obviously not telling that they hit the older kid first. Definitely the adults will think that older kids just want to bully little kids

Every time I scrolled past posts from an international news company it always showed a picture of the damages from our side but with misleading headings that anyone who scrolled past without clicking and reading the whole story will believe that the images are from "weaker and smaller" country. When we retaliated by only aiming our weapons at their military, never at their civilians, the news just shortened the headlines to just us using "better" technology to "attack".

When I was young I used to believe in the professionalism of international news companies but as I grew up I saw how biased they all are. It all depend on the source of income. They now became loudspeakers for a certain organisation or a country. Online news nowadays has to be faster and attention grabbing while accuracy and truth does not seem to matter anymore.

No need to guess who the sponsors are but now their news are constantly portraying us in such a way that they can be the "hero" to swoop in, intervene, save the "small and weak" country from being "bullied", and have excuses to force us to comply to any of their requests which might even bring a bigger mess to our land.

I really hate to admit, but another biggest problem also stems internally where many of the corrupted officials in my country just kept quiet and not actively protesting against all the claims and fake news because they are afraid to lose their "business" they made with the neighboring country. We normal citizens are trying our best to spread the words to the world while these officials are always late to make any official statements.

No one wants violence, talking it out is always the best solution, but how can we be sure that our officials will protect our land when they enter the so-called "peace talk"? Or the middle man is truly in the middle? On top of this, recently there was a cease fire agreement made, my country was still under constant attack even way past the deadline. They kept saying to the world they wanted peace but they still aimed their weapons toward our towns and evacuation sites, while the news reported their words but not their actions.

The fastest and loudest always win because people believe what they see and hear first. All I can hope is that someone does read this and understand our situations more.

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Two kids fought over who will get the candies that they found on the ground, the young kid and older kid run to the adults for help, which the adults tell the older kid to be kind and give some of the candies away.

Now the younger kid felt that adults take their side so they tell the older kid to give them all the other candies in the older kid's pocket. This time the older kid refused since this time it clearly belonged to the older kid. The older kid had these candies before finding the one on the floor.

The younger kid started a tantrum and kept hitting the older kid with a metal bat, the older kid asked them to stop many times and it did not work so the older kid had to somehow divert the young kid's bat away.

Obviously, that action might hurt the young kid and now bat thrown away, they again ran and screamed telling all the adults nearby that the older kid hurt them.

Yep my country is that older kid. And the adults are either other countries who think we're bullying the weak or my country's corrupted higher ups that are willing to take candies away from the older kid's pocket and give them to anyone that can give them cash.

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Time/Space/Memories

Of course they are different but humans tend to be unable to undo what they saw 😅

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June Bujo weekly spread

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Felt that the flower feathered clan is the most out of place clan, since their housing and structures are so randomly placed. However, here is my attempt to make next week bujo weekly spread of this place.

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More Natlan's scenery paintings for my May's bullet journal. I don't have a scanner so I just use a phone camera and some free app for filter.

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Ix Uxul Tz'ib Bolon Ch'ule-L

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Posted this bujo layout on HoyoLab for several weeks now. Did not expect much from cheap paper and watercolor, but it turned out not too shabby. I never colored clouds with watercolor before.

I did not expect Natlan to be so vibrant, but oh well, the scenery is still pretty.

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Already at the end of February.

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Due to exams, I didn't plan ahead for this year's bullet journal layout at all, so this month's theme I just picked another hoyo game that I haven't applied. I kinda have fear of drawing ZZZ fanart because I'm not used to drawing futuristic/science fiction/modern style.

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I felt sorry for my tablet pen which is constantly fully charged. So forced myself to continue doodling from fandom/references/randomness while using color palettes found on tumblr.

This latest doodle was challenging not only because I'm not used to the vibrant colorful palette, it's just that I only got out of bed and spontaneously decided to doodle. I was completely awake by the time I got to ZZZ Soukaku doodle lol.

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Practiced applying color palette and one brush when you just finished watching an anime and playing game. What a bummer.

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Shonen/Shojo Oba/Oji San Yokai cat: my long time favorite meets my recently discovered obsession.

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Normally I read the manga before all this anime and hype comes out. Unforgivingly, I missed this gem. Found out about it from ppl making fan art of current shonen heroes saying goodbye to jjk. At the same time; the anime is dropped.

And now I'm so obsessed after watching the 1st EP, then spent two days reading and re-reading all the chapters.

I love horror manga since I was small, I read those 90s like Nube, Ushio and Tora. Even DDD brings all those paranormals and extraterrestrials back making one might think it's cliche or corny. Nostalgia just took over anyway and Nube kinda helped me develop tolerance to the cringe. What is different from the old manga, we got stronger women and dual protagonists who are dysfunctionally suited for each other.

However, after reading many hyped manga that went later down hill and made me dropped them, can't help but worry how he author maintain the audience's interest. I'm that pesstimistic, yo.

Dandadan | Ep2 | This is amazing. I’m brimming with power! But I’m totally depressed.

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My room is always like that.

Wenn es gar so dunkel ist in deinem Leben, sieh doch einmal nach, ob es nicht am Ende daher kommt, daß alle deine Fensterläden verschlossen sind.

If your life is so dark, just take a look and see if it isn't ultimately because all your shutters are closed.

Johannes Kepler (1571 – 1630), German natural philosopher, mathematician, astronomer, astrologer, optician and Protestant theologian

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A shame that it will never be completed.

Gameinformer Issue 277 || Final Fantasy XV

May 2016

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When Misha said it's friendly... I start to think it's cute.