internetangstar

[internetangstar]

can I come over and dodge roll into all your breakable furniture

[internetangstar]

My year of swag and resurrection

[internetangstar]

Karin Hosono - arakawa､みえる

[internetangstar]

“i’ll just get gas in the morning” no. that is the devil talking

[internetangstar]

Hop hop hop!

[internetangstar]

sometimes people will be like "just lost a follower over my last post" and every time I am baffled by the idea of 1) knowing exactly how many followers you have 2) assuming they unfollowed you for something specific and 3) POSTING about it

[internetangstar]

"Yeah hold on, let me change out of my work clothes" [undoes a single button on my hawaiian shirt and nothing else]

[internetangstar]

? varric we're at the fucking beach

[internetangstar]

Most infuriating part of writing is having an idea and thinking oh, this is gonna be so good and wanting to IMMEDIATELY share the vision with other people because it's gonna be good but then you start writing it down and - it is gonna be good. Except. It is also gonna take so, so, so long to finish. And in the meantime. You are the only one with The Vision. Alone. Losing your mind. 😭

[internetangstar]

was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.

[internetangstar]

literally nothing will ever be funnier than this oneshot kill from merrill

[internetangstar]

reblog to give writers the power to write 10k words of porn without plot

[internetangstar]

Reading!

[internetangstar]

theyre called monitor lizards on account of their pc compatibility

[internetangstar]

giggling excessively at a passage of pliny the elder where he's talking about what ailments having sex can cure and says that it's really not good for much and, i quote, "by hercules! the more rarely it is used the better." pliny voice quit fuckin' #abstinencelife

[internetangstar]

They hate me for my redundancies. And also for my tendency to say the same thing but in slightly different ways. And for my repetition of phrases. And for my redundancies.

[internetangstar]

it’s from pussy’s sporting goods