itjustkindahappenedreally

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

You came back. Nobody gets left behind LILO AND STITCH (2002) Dir. Chris Sanders & Dean DeBlois

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

real people

chapter eighteen (finale)

18+

the final part.

Content Warning: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader, angst, mention of pregnancy, enemies to lovers to strangers, fluff, mention of sex, misunderstanding trope bc why not, and omg I am not ready to say goodbye to these characters I want to cryyyyyyyy. super long author's note at the end

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"This is nice," Gwen says, her eyes closed as she stands with her arms up, allowing the breeze to brush over her skin. Her loose, white shirt flies behind her and the waves gently kiss at her feet. You're not sure why she keeps saying that - this is nice - but you hardly go an hour without hearing those words pour from her mouth, drenched in contentment.

The sunset has caused the sky to match her hair, the sand cooling down under your palms. You watch as the ice in your sangria melts, letting the sound of the waves relax you. Not that there's anything causing you any stress right now - having been in Mexico for a week now, you're completely zen. But there is one thought that threatens to disturb your peace.

"Do you think he'll be here?" You can't help but ask her.

Her head turns to the side, her eyes fluttering open. She knows who you're talking about without having to ask for clarification. "He's the best man," She reminds you. "Of course he'll be here."

"This early on, though?" You wonder, grabbing fistfuls of sand. "The rehearsal dinner isn't until Friday."

Gwen turns so she's fully facing you, a blank look on her face. "I know what you want to hear, but I'm not going to lie to you," She begins. "He's here. Just landed today, actually."

Your stomach churns and you nod, looking down at your lap.

"What?" She asks you, taking a few steps closer. "Are you really that nervous to see him?"

"I haven't seen him since..." You trail off, shaking your head.

"Then maybe it's about time you did," She says bluntly. "I mean, for Christ's sake, it's been what? Three years?"

"I know, but..." You mumble, feeling dumb. "It's weird. We were together for such a short period of time, and now we've spent so much time apart... but I still-"

"Don't," Gwen cuts you off curtly. "I swear to God, don't say it."

"I wasn't gonna say love," You claim. "I just mean, I won't know how I feel until I see him."

"Well, then," She chirps. "Good thing both of you brought dates."

"He brought a date?" You ask, feeling nauseous at the thought of seeing him with someone else.

"Mhm," Gwen confirms. "But you have Pietro, so you're both in the same boat, which is good.

"Yeah," You utter dryly. "Great."

Gwen stretches before holding her hand out to you. "C'mon, we need to get ready. If we miss dinner again, Sharon will make me sleep on this beach," She says before grabbing your hand and pulling you up to your feet.

The two of you make your way back to the resort, but this time, you're no longer zen. You're a bundle of nerves.

Standing in front of the full-length mirror, you turn to the side to get a look at yourself at all angles. Ever since your conversation with Gwen on the beach, you've felt a pit in your stomach and it's weighing you down, making you want to do nothing more than crawl into bed and hide from the world.

There's a knock at the door which makes you jump slightly, before it swings open. "Hey, you," Pietro says as he walks in with a grin. "You look incredible."

Relaxing a little with his presence, you smile at him in the mirror. "Thank you, P," You reply. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yep - just need to use the bathroom," He says as he walks towards it.

"Ugh, please don't clog it again!" You call out as he walks past you.

With a sly grin and a squeeze of your ass, he swings open the door. "I won't," He swears as he walks in, and you know better than to believe him.

"Why do I fuck you, again?" You call out, shaking your head.

Pietro opens the door again and pokes his head through. "Because I'm a damn good fuck, baby," He says with a wink. "Your words."

Rolling your eyes, you fiddle with your hair. "Whatever. Go poop - and hurry, because Sharon will kill me if I'm late!"

While you wait for him, you sit on the bed and decide to scroll through social media. You notice that Steve's got a new story up, so with a soft smile you open it up, expecting to see a photo of him and Sharon - but it's a photo of a gift-wrapped box with a Rolex on top of it. Gift from the best man, the caption reads. With a gasp, you close Instagram and put your phone down. And immediately, you hate how affected you are, just from a mere mention of him.

Fuck, you're screwed.

"I'm ready!" Pietro announces as he walks back out the bathroom.

"Did you wash your ha-"

"Yes, I washed my hands," He cuts you off with a laugh as he walks over and takes your hand, pulling you up to your feet. Moving in closer, he gives you a soft kiss. "You really do look so fucking good."

"No," You say sternly. "I refuse to be late to this dinner, P."

He tilts his head, giving you the soft-eyed, ever-so-slightly-desperate look he knows drives you crazy. "Gimme ten minutes, baby," He mumbles.

You narrow your eyes at him and push him back. "No. You'll mess up my hair and makeup," You whine.

"C'mere," He whispers before kissing you, once, twice, three times.

You melt into it, allowing yourself the respite of his physical comfort from your overthinking head, but then your mind conjures up the image of Sharon's pissed-off expression, which is enough motivation to give you the strength to pull away. "Let's go," You decide firmly. "It's Sharon's wedding week. I'm not gonna stress her out anymore than she already is."

Giving in with a sigh, he nods and takes a step back. "Alright," He says, following you to the door. "Have I told you how sexy you are when you're being all considerate for your friends, and shit?"

The resort has been booked out in its entirety by Steve and Sharon for the week, allowing them to spend a few days with their nearest and dearest before the big day on Saturday. So far, Sharon's been spending the days with her bridesmaids, Steve with his groomsmen, and each evening, everyone comes together to have dinner. It's been fine so far, but today's the first night that all the groomsmen are here - which has you almost shaking as you and Pietro make your way to the dining hall.

"What's wrong? Nervous to see everyone?" Pietro asks you as your heels click against the marble floor. "You've already met 'em all before, right? Oh, wait, shit. Isn't your ex here tonight?"

He swings the doors to the hall open and, of course, it seems you're the last ones to arrive. Thankfully, Sharon doesn't look annoyed in the slightest, as everyone turns to look at you.

"They're here!" Sharon squeals, standing up with her glass of wine raised up. "Come in, sit down!"

Pietro's got his arm around your waist, so when he begins to walk in, even though your feet feel planted to the ground, you can't help but move with him. But your eyes stayed glued to him.

Bucky.

It's like time slows down. He looks so different, but also exactly the same. And he's staring back at you. A small part of you is acutely aware of the beautiful woman sitting by his side, but everyone else melts away into irrelevance when you're looking at him. It's the first time in three years that you've been so close to him - sitting at opposite ends of a 25-seat table - but it feels as familiar as though no time has passed at all.

"Red or white tonight?" Steve asks you as he stands up to pour you a glass of wine.

Ripping your eyes away from Bucky and looking up at Steve, you let out a huff. "Brown," You reply curtly before grabbing a bottle of whisky from the middle of the table and pouring it into your glass.

Steve chuckles before pouring Pietro some wine, and you take a long sip. Next to you, Gwen gently nudges your stomach. "Way to be subtle," She hisses under her breath. "You guys just stared at each other for, like, five minutes."

"Shut up," You whisper, before you smile widely at Sharon who's sitting opposite you. "You look amazing, Shar!"

And she really does - this whole week, she's been glowing. "Thank you," She sings, still standing. Clearing her throat, she taps her glass of water with her fork, getting everyone's attention. "Alright. Everyone is officially here! Besides, like, our family, and everyone else," She begins with a soft laugh. "Steve and I are so, so grateful that you've all taken time out of your incredibly busy schedules to come and spend the last few days before the wedding with us. Ever since Steve and I started talking about getting married, we really had only one priority - to have a relaxed time with our best friends. Mexico has always meant so much to him and I - ever since the school trip episode of Sunset Lake, and all the times we returned together since - so it only felt right to get married here. In four days, Steve and I will be standing at the altar, with all of you there- but until then, we can eat, relax, get pampered, and party!"

Everyone holds up their respective glasses and cheers along with her, and Steve stands up and gives her a kiss. You grin as you watch them, so entirely in love. It makes you yearn for that feeling. Sure, sleeping with Pietro is fun and fulfils your needs, but you haven't felt a deeper connection to anyone since... Bucky.

You dare to steal a glance at him. He's pouring his date a drink- you recognize her. She's from some TV show that was big on Netflix or Hulu last year. Not his usual type, but then again, he's been linked with all sorts of women over the past three years. And he could say the same about you.

Before long, the food is served, so you can distract yourself with hummus and pita. You have conversations with Sharon and Steve, Gwen and Peter, and a few hushed comments fly between you and Pietro, but as it's such a big group, you can't venture out much further than them. Not that you particularly want to.

She finds him funny, that much is for sure. She pulls him arm whenever he makes her laugh, which is often.

"Her name's Jean," Gwen tells you, knowing you too well to not realize what it is you're thinking. "They work together. They've been spotted out at dinner a few times since."

"I feel sick," You utter, grabbing your napkin.

"Don't worry- you have Pietro, so you're on equal ground with him right now," Gwen says in an attempt to comfort you - as if the thing you're upset about is that Bucky is one-upping you.

"Pietro is nothing more than a human dildo to me," You whisper bitterly. "Bucky's actually dating that woman. With emotions."

"That's mean," Pietro chimes in as he wraps an arm around your shoulder, resting his chin on your other shoulder.

"Shut up. You're lucky I let you anywhere near me," You say to him with an eye-roll.

He bites down on his fist and leans in closer to Gwen with his head at your chest. "Isn't she so sexy?" He says lowly, to which she just snorts.

While everyone else continues chatting and drinking, you can't help but fall into the darkest depths of your mind.

He doesn't want you anymore. He probably hasn't for a while. You wonder how long it took him to officially be over you. You thought you might have been starting to get over him until you saw him tonight. All the feelings just came rushing back, hitting you like a truck. The last thing you wanted all those years ago was to become a stranger to him- but it seems like it might be too late.

Suddenly, you feel a kick under the table. You frown and look up to see Sharon giving you a pointed look as she taps her phone. While Gwen and Pietro chat, you look down at your phone to see a message from Sharon.

SharBear

I need to meet you tonight once everyone's in their rooms. Midnight outside reception. It's important. Please!

Without hesitation, you respond.

You

I'll be there.

Your mind is swirling with all the things Sharon could possibly want to speak to you about - has something gone wrong with the wedding plans? Has she suddenly got cold feet? You pace at reception for ten minutes before she finally appears.

"Oh, my God, I'm so sorry, I was waiting for Steve to get into the shower," She says in a hushed voice as she rushes over from the elevator and grabs your hands. "Thank you for meeting me."

"Of course, Sharon," You say, deeply concerned. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything's perfect!" She replies instinctively with a chirpy smile, before letting out a sigh and letting her face fall. "But... it might not be."

"What's going on?" You ask her, pulling her away from the worker at the front desk who's giving you odd looks and towards the entrance of the hotel.

She looks around the lobby, making sure nobody's around before she speaks. "I need... I need you to buy me something," She utters.

You frown as you lower your voice. "Like... drugs?" You whisper. "Something to help you relax? Pietro might have a xanny-"

"No, not like that," She cuts you off with a mild look of panic in her eyes as they meet yours. "I need, um... I think I need a pregnancy test?"

Up until now, you would've liked to think that you'd be the calm, collected friend during crises. That you'd be the level-headed leader keeping everyone's panic at bay, coming up with an action plan and swiftly carrying it out without fault. But instead, you suck in a loud gasp and slap your hands over your face. "Sharon!" You let out, your yell muffled by your hands.

"I know, I know, it's crazy," She says as she shakes her hands. "It's just so I can be sure, before I drink myself into oblivion this week."

"That's why you haven't been drinking," You say with wide eyes as everything falls into place in your head. "And you didn't eat the edibles yesterday!"

"I'm just being careful, until I can be sure," Sharon says. "Now, you're my best friend and the one I trust most out of everyone here. I can't trust the resort workers not to leak it to the press, so I can't ask them or even order one online in case they snoop. So it has to be you, Y/N."

Taking in a deep breath, you nod, accepting the responsibility. "Yes. I can do this," You tell her, keeping your voice firm. "I can do this for you."

"Great. There's a pharmacy about a mile away, it's open twenty-four hours. Steve and I stopped there when we landed, to get... condoms," She says, wincing.

"Yes, got it," You say, trying to remain calm. "I'll call a taxi and-"

"No public transport," She cuts in quickly. "Everyone in this city knows the wedding is this week. They all know we're here. If a cab driver recognizes you - I can't handle the scandal, Y/N."

"So what do you want me to do?" You ask her, shaking your head. "It's not like I can walk a mile in the middle of the night!"

Just then, someone walks into the hotel. It's, of course, none other than Bucky, holding a motorcycle helmet under his arm. You can practically see the cogs turning in Sharon's head as she looks at him.

"Sharon, no. No, Sharon," You say gravely, holding her arms tight. But it's too late.

"Bucky!" She calls out, making you die inside.

"Hey," He replies, while you stare at the floor. "What are you both doing down here so late?"

"We, um, have a little issue," She tells him. "Just a little visit from Aunt Flo, you know?"

"Oh, right," He mumbles, and you can't help but feel a shiver at the sound of his voice. Get it together.

"Yeah, so... would you be able to give Y/N a lift to a pharmacy?" She asks him while you grimace. "So she can stock up on tampons, and stuff."

"Sure," Bucky replies. "Let's go."

"Thank you so much!" Sharon exclaims, giving him a hug before coming back to you and placing her hands on your shoulder. "And thank you. I love you."

"You're lucky I love you, too," You mutter, before turning to face him.

He holds the helmet out to you and you take it before following him out, shooting Sharon one last glare on your way.

"So, the pharmacy?" Bucky asks as he taps on his phone.

"Yeah, Sharon said there should be one about a mile away?" You respond, your voice pathetically small.

"Got it. Let's go," He says while sticking his phone with the map on on the handlebar and getting on the bike.

You take in a deep breath before putting on the helmet and getting on behind him, planning to hold onto the handles located behind you for the entirety of the ride - but the second he rides off, you instantly clamber to wrap your arms around him. It may be awkward, but you'd rather that than die before the wedding.

The ride is quiet, save for the sound of the engine. The streets are pretty bare, being in a less-populated area, and the sky is full of stars. After a few minutes, you take off your helmet so as to feel the fresh air on your face, and to get a proper view of the starry night. Soon, you arrive at the pharmacy, and Bucky parks up outside. When you jump off and he sees you without the helmet on, he sighs.

"I would really rather you keep that on during the ride," He says lowly.

"Sorry," You utter, slowly backing away towards the shop. "Want anything?"

He simply shakes his head, and you nod before turning and walking into the pharmacy. Thankfully, there's a box of face masks at the entrance so you grab one and wear it. The man at the counter doesn't seem the type to keep up with celebrity news, but you want to do all you can to keep things under wrap. You walk through the aisles until you get to the shelves with pregnancy tests, and decide to grab one of each of the five brands available, knowing Sharon's the type to want to double and triple check. Along with the tests, you grab a chapstick, for no other reason than to make it feel like a normal shopping trip, though the combination of Sharon's news and being back on Bucky's bike has you feeling like you're having an out-of-body experience.

Just as you put the tests and chapstick on the counter, you feel a presence behind you. You turn your head to see Bucky standing there, holding a bag of chips. And his eyes are on the tests.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Without a word, you toss four ₱500 notes on the counter and take the plastic bag from the worker before stuffing in the tests and chapsticks and walking out the store. When you get out, all you want to do is scream. He thinks you're pregnant, or at least potentially so. And you can't even correct him because then you'd be outing Sharon. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"Ready to go?" He asks as he walks out of the pharmacy, as casual as ever. Fucker.

"You're so annoying!" You can't help but explode at him once you rip the mask off your face.

Taken aback, he raises a brow. "Excuse me?"

"If you wanted fucking chips, why didn't you just ask me to buy you chips?" You ask him, frustration dropping from your tone.

"What is your problem?" Bucky asks you, taking a step closer.

"I clearly asked you if you wanted anything, and you said no," You hurl at him.

"I changed my mind," He says flatly.

"You changed your mi- you're such a dick," You hiss, turning away.

"Will you calm down?" He calls out. "It's... not a big deal!"

"Not a big deal?" You all but scream, turning back to him. He thinks you could be pregnant with Pietro's baby. He thinks you're that close - that you'd be that reckless because you're that locked in with fucking Pietro. And he doesn't seem to care.

"Yes, it's not a big deal," He doubles down.

"Whatever," You huff before spinning back on your heel and storming away.

"Where do you think you're going?" His voice booms behind you, but you're too irritated to think or act rationally. You simply continue stomping away, too stubborn to accept a ride back to the resort with him. Safety be damned. You have pregnancy tests and chapstick to defend yourself with.

The rumbling of his bike gets louder and after a few seconds, he pulls up next to you. "Get on the damn bike, Y/N," He orders you sternly.

"Fuck you," You spit, walking even faster.

He trails slowly behind you, his bike swaying side to side as he does his best to keep the slow pace. "You're going the wrong way, dipshit," He says, and it feels like the air turns twenty degrees colder.

The old nickname makes you falter in your steps, but you continue moving. "Maybe I'm taking the scenic route," You utter.

He speeds up for a second before turning his bike in front of you, stopping you from going any further. With a glare, he lets out a huff through his nostrils. "Get on the bike. I'm tired, and I don't have time for this," He says curtly.

"Then go back to the hotel and get in bed," You say with your arms folded across your chest. "I'm sure Jean's waiting for you."

Bucky narrows his eyes at you. "What, are you jealous?" He asks, to which you scoff.

"You wish!" You all but yell. "Just go. I'll call an Uber."

"It's almost 1am. I'm not letting you get a cab alone," He says bluntly. "Get on the bike, we'll go back to the hotel, and we can pretend like this night didn't happen."

A dry laugh leaves your mouth of its own accord. "I've heard that before," You mutter bitterly.

Without a word, he holds the helmet out to you. You roll your eyes before grabbing it off him and getting on the bike, as much as it pains you to give in. This time, even though you're terrified, you keep your hands firmly on the handles behind you, refusing to let him think you want to touch him. Although it hurts to be back at square one with him, it's easier to focus on being annoyed at him than to realize he's over you.

Once you get back to the resort, you clamber off the bike and pull the helmet off, putting it down where you were sitting. He sits and types on his phone.

"Thanks for the ride," You mumble like a child being forced to show manners.

He just grunts in response.

The next morning at breakfast, you're inwardly stressing as you try to find the perfect opportunity for you to transport the five pregnancy tests in your bag to Sharon's without anyone seeing.

"Y/N, sit down!" Gwen calls out before grabbing your hand and yanking you down onto the empty seat next to her.

You give her a smile. "I actually just need to speak to Shar-"

"Eat first," She cuts you off sternly as she places a pastry onto your plate.

"Ooh, those look good," The person sitting on the other side of you comments. You turn to see none other than Bucky's date, Jean. "Could you please hand me one?"

Of course she's lovely and polite. Fuck's sake.

"Sure," You reply with a smile as you grab the platter and hold it out to her.

She grabs a square croissant and puts it on her plate with a bashful look. "Thank you. God, this is so surreal," She says with flushed cheeks. "I'm just, like, a huge fan of you."

Damn. She's making it really hard to hate her.

"That's so sweet, thank you," You reply.

"It's just crazy being in a room, practically on vacation, with a group of people I look up to," She continues with awe in her eyes. "Oh, I'm Jean, by the way. I... I'm here with... uh..."

"It's alright. I know you're Bucky's date," You tell her with a soft laugh. "I'm not sweating over a six-month situationship I had three years ago, don't worry."

A throat clear behind you. "Morning, everyone," Bucky says, squeezing her shoulders before taking a seat next to her.

"Oops," You whisper to yourself.

"Morning, sunshine," Jean greets him sweetly with a kiss on his cheek before she turns back to you. "So, I have to ask you: what was it like working with the Norman Osborn? Was it everything I dream about?"

"Oh, and more," You answer her emphatically. "He's just... a genius. It sounds cliché, but that's really the only way I can describe him. Being on set with him alone was flabbergasting, but being directed by him? I genuinely felt like a new woman every day. A new actress, should I say."

"Wow. I am so jealous," Jean says. "And the movie was incredible. You're gonna think I'm lying, but I literally watched it in theatres, like, twelve times."

"So, you're who I need to thank for the box office success," You say teasingly.

"You were so robbed at the Oscars this year," She says with a scoff. "Like, I know the other nominees were great, but none of them held a candle to your performance."

"I was just grateful to be nominated," You tell her, giving her the PR-approved response.

She narrows her eyes, leans in, and lowers her voice. "Yeah, but you were also thinking, what the fuck? Right?" Jean whispers. "Don't worry, it's a safe space."

With a delighted laugh, you lightly push her arm. "Of course not," You say, before whispering, "Maybe."

After spending the entirety of breakfast laughing non-stop with Bucky's girlfriend, much to the surprise of everyone, you soon become acutely aware of the tests in your bag.

As everyone gets up to return to their rooms and freshen up before the day's activities, you pull Sharon to a quiet corner. "Hey," You whisper. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay," She answers with a quick nod. "Haven't vomited today, but we'll see how long breakfast lasts."

"Uh, I've got the... things," You utter, giving her a pointed look as you shake your bag.

"Oh! Yeah, great, thank you so much," She says, holding your hands. "How was it with Bucky? I hope it wasn't too awkward? He didn't see, did he?"

Opting not to tell her about how he saw you buying the tests and how you subsequently screamed at him in the street, you nod. "It was fine," You lie. "Do you want them now?"

"Yes," She says, holding her bag open next to yours. "Just... don't be suspicious."

Trying to act casual, angling your bags so that nobody behind can see them, you slowly transport the tests one by one from your bag to hers.

"Fuck, how many did you get?" She asks with wide eyes.

"I figured you'd want to be really sure," You tell her with a shrug as you drop the last one in.

A smile breaks out on her face. "You know me so well," She says, pulling you in for a hug. "Thank you. You're the best."

"Do you wanna take one now?" You ask as you pull away. "I can come with you."

"I'm gonna wait until tomorrow," She tells you. "When Mom's here. I need her with me in case it's... yeah."

"Of course," You say with an understanding nod, though the sentiment doesn't reach your heart. Not having a mom in your life means if you were in Sharon's position, it would be her or Gwen you needed by your side - and for some twisted reason, it has you feeling bitter that you wouldn't be their chosen pregnancy-test aide. You know it's irrational and unfair to feel that way, but you can't help it.

"Okay, let's go back to everyone before they wonder what we're talking about," Sharon chirps as she takes your arm and leads you back to the group.

Jean gasps and rushes over to you when she sees you. "Hey, have you been to the spa yet?" She asks you excitedly.

"I haven't, actually," You tell her. "Been too busy helping Sharon out with wedding stuff."

"You have to come," She says, grabbing your hand. "They are incredible here. Bring Pietro, too - it can be like a double date at the spa!"

Realizing that that means Bucky will also be there, you falter. "Uh, I don't know if Pietro will-"

"If Pietro will what?" The man himself  asks as he appears, hugging you from behind.

"Oh, we were talking about spending some time at the spa," Jean tells him. "You're down, right?"

"Absolutely," He answers.

"So, it's settled!" She exclaims with a giddy grin. "We'll meet you there in an hour."

"Can't wait," You say half-heartedly.

You all but melt into the warm hot tub, closing your eyes and letting all your stress go with the steam. Pregnancy tests. Exes. Forget it all.

"Mind if I join?" An all too familiar voice asks.

Opening your eyes, you see Bucky stepping down into the tub. "Doesn't seem like I have a choice," You mutter.

There's a few moments of blissful silence, and you close your eyes again, electing to pretend as though he isn't there. The sound of Pietro and Jean racing laps in the swimming pool fades into the background, and all you can hear is the bubbles fizzing-

"So, a six-month situationship, huh?" Bucky abruptly cuts into your thoughts. "That's how you look at it?"

You let out a deep sigh, refusing to let him bait you into giving him a reaction. "What else would you call it?" You ask him.

He doesn't answer, but you're not foolish enough to think that's the end of the conversation. "So, you pregnant?" He asks bluntly.

"No," You reply.

"Took all five tests?"

"Shut up."

"Make me."

"Were you always this childish?" You ask, opening your eyes to glare at him. "I'm none of your business anymore, Barnes. I haven't been for three years."

He's staring at you. "A heads-up would've been nice," He says bitterly. "Y'know, that 'see you later' actually meant fuck you, I'm done."

"I wasn't done," You correct him gravely. "Though you obviously were."

"Are you kidding me?" He asks with a dry laugh.

"Oh, sorry, all the times you tried so hard to contact me must've got lost in the mail," You say flatly.

"Contact you? And when was the best time? When you were dating your co-star while filming in Australia? Or maybe when you came back and started dating those other schmucks?" He spits.

"You cannot be serious," You say gravely. "Says Mr. 'Dating Three Women At Once'!"

"Really? You of all people believe what the media said?" Bucky asks incredulously.

"Oh, fuck you!" You yell, standing up.

"Fuck you," He returns just as harshly, standing up as well.

He's looking down at you with a look in his eyes you haven't seen since you first met - that day on Steve's yacht when you first debuted your fake relationship to the world. It sends a shiver down your spine. Full of rage and seemingly genuine hatred - and it makes you want to kiss him.

Bucky tries to stay strong, but his eyes betray him, flickering down to look at your drenched, bikini-clad body, the same body he's been missing for three years. He remembers all the places he left marks, and all the places he kissed it better.

"I never forgot how I felt," He says in a hushed, rushed tone.

"You didn't even blink at the possibility of me being pregnant with another man's child," You point out coldly.

"Listen to me," He utters, grabbing your wrist. "I thought about you every single minute. I still do."

"Bucky, shut up," You whisper, highly aware of both Pietro and Jean making their way over.

"Tell me you don't feel the same," He challenges you. "Tell me you don't want anymore. That you don't love me anymore."

"What the fuck, Barnes?" You hiss.

"If you can tell me you don't love me anymore, I won't bring it up again," He says.

You raise a brow.

His jaw clenches for a second. "But if you can't, I'll spend every waking moment getting you back," He finishes.

With a pit in your stomach and a lump in your throat, you shoot him one last glare. "You're too late," You utter before pulling your wrist out of his grip and leaving him there alone.

Friday evening arrives, and with it, the rehearsal dinner. Steve and Sharon's families have also arrived at the resort, meaning there's a lot more people around the table which makes it a heck of a lot easier to ignore Bucky's stares.

"What is going on between you?" Gwen asks you in a hushed voice as you're served by the waiting staff. "He hasn't stopped looking at you all day, with that weird, intense stare. Did you speak to him?"

With a shrug, you pick up your glass of wine. "It's Bucky. He's always weird and intense," You answer lamely.

"Oh, my God. Did he say something to you?" She presses. "You have to tell me. Are you guys... sleeping together?"

"What? No," You answer instantly. "What do you think of me, Gwen?"

"I don't know; when two people with history reconnect, there can be major sparks," She says while cutting into a roasted potato. "All the feelings come rushing back."

Instead of validating her theory with a response, you begin to eat.

"Holy shit. You did reconnect, didn't you?" She hisses. "I knew it!"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," You say plainly.

She lets out a sigh. "Look, if you realized that there are still strong feelings between you, that's not a bad thing."

"Not a bad thing? He's got a girlfriend!" You whisper-shout, grateful for the sound of cutlery on porcelain drowning you out.

"Hasn't stopped you before," Gwen lets out before gasping at herself. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that. I mean - what he had with Natasha wasn't even real-"

"I get it, Gwen, it's fine," You cut in, and the two of you leave it at that.

While you're eating, Sharon gets out of her seat and walks around the table to you, smiling and squeezing the shoulders of everyone she passes on her way. When she gets to you, she brings her mouth to your ear and lowers her voice. "Can you come to the lobby with me?"

Once again, you're filled with anxiety and dread as you follow her out of the room. She holds your hand tight, and neither of you say a word as you walk to the lobby.

"Everything okay?" You ask once you get there, making sure the receptionist is out of earshot.

Sharon takes in a deep breath. "I took the test. Well, all five tests," She begins, a mixture of worry and fear in her eyes. "And... they were all positive."

You slap your hands over your mouth. "Oh, my God!" You all but scream, thankfully muffling your voice with your hands.

"I know!" She exclaims, breathing in and out quickly.

"That's amazing!" You tell her with a wide grin. "Congratulations!"

"Thank you," She whispers with teary eyes.

"Have you told Steve?" You ask her, to which she shakes her head.

"Not yet. I just... I don't know how," She admits. "My mom said I should just tell him, but... what if he gets scared? What if it's too much for him and he gets cold feet?"

"Sharon, that man looks at you like you hung the moon and stars," You tell her, holding her shoulders. "He loves you more than anything. The last thing he would do is leave you alone, especially if he knew the truth. Love isn't something you can just... throw away. Forget about. You can only confront it, and accept it... and... denying yourself of it would be the biggest disservice you could do to yourself."

She narrows her eyes. "Are we still talking about me being pregnant?"

You raise your brows, and let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding in. "I don't know," You say in a small voice.

"Okay, well, I want to do something special for him," She tells you. "He's always planning so many nice surprises for me, and I want to do the same. So, I need your help."

"Anything," You tell her.

A sly grin grows on her face. "I love you," She says.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" You ask her with a frown. "Like you've done something I won't like?"

"Well, I thought you might need some help setting it up," She begins, glancing behind her. "So, I enlisted another pair of hands. The only other person I trust with my life who wouldn't go to the press."

Before you can ask her exactly who she's talking about, none other than Bucky walks into the lobby with an expectant look on his face. "Hey, Sharon. What is it you needed my help with?"

She looks at you with wide, hopeful eyes. "I don't want him to know it's for me, yet," She whispers to you. "Don't want him to know before Steve. You can tell him the truth once Steve knows."

With a sigh, you swallow your pride. "Uh, fuck. It's me, Barnes," You say flatly, hating every second of this. "As it turns out... I am pregnant."

He looks taken aback.

"And she wants to surprise Pietro," Sharon chimes in. "Can you help her set up the surprise on the beach? At this point, we don't want anyone knowing that doesn't need to, or that we don't trust."

With a nod, Bucky keeps his face free of emotion. "Of course."

You're convinced that you died and this is hell, because you've experienced nothing worse than setting up a 'We're Pregnant!' message on the beach with Bucky, who thinks the pregnancy is yours, and that the father is Pietro.

Bucky seems to have an artistic eye as he sets out the flowers around the words in the sand. You're lighting the candles, wondering how it got to this.

"This is so weird," You mumble.

"Yep," He replies curtly. "Didn't imagine this would be happening three years ago."

"It's been a long time," You say. "A lot has changed."

"You haven't," He says, looking down at the sand. "Still just as gorgeous."

A soft laugh leaves your mouth. "Should you be flirting with a pregnant woman?"

Bucky looks up at you, into your eyes. "Do you love him?" He asks you.

You struggle with the lighter, letting out a frustrated huff before answering him. "It started out as just sex," You say truthfully.

"Like us?"

You snort. "I guess."

"Do you love him?" He asks you again.

"Let's... not do this now," You suggest.

He lets out a long sigh and sits up. "When it ended with Natasha... my first thought was you. Carol told me to wait, at least a few weeks, so it didn't look like I was just jumping between you. I also didn't want to overwhelm you, or take attention off the fact that you won the case," He tells you. "Then you left New York to film in Australia. And the rumors about you and Luke... I just thought it would be best to leave you to it. You were working abroad. It wasn't the right time."

"Then I came back, and you were dating someone else," You remember.

"Wasn't dating her," He mumbles. "Emma and I were just friends."

"Well, it didn't look like that, and I didn't wanna reach out just to hear that you had moved on," You tell him truthfully. "I... I don't think I could have handled hearing that. For it to be final. Outlined clearly. I guess it was easier to live with the vagueness. The hope that... maybe we just needed time, and eventually we'd find each other again. But I couldn't listen to you telling me you were with someone else. I just couldn't."

He lets out a shaky breath. "I felt the same," He admits. "I know I'm a fucking coward for not trying harder. And now I'm too late."

"You're not a coward. You were just protecting yourself," You say lowly, before looking around. "I think we're done. Thanks for your help."

"Of course," He mumbles.

Sending Sharon a quick text telling her it's ready, you get up to leave. Bucky begins walking away, a look of dejection on his face, when you grab his hand. "Hold on. Just... wait here with me," You say, pulling him behind a rock.

"What are we doing here?" He asks you with a frown.

"Just wait," You whisper, looking over the rock. A few minutes pass before Sharon and Steve walk out the hotel.

"What are they doing here?" Bucky wonders. "Want me to stall them while you wait for Pietro?"

"Wait," You repeat, feeling the confusion emanate from him.

As Sharon and Steve make their way down to the beach, you hold your breath. Steve seems confused to the babble leaving Sharon's mouth, until they get to the candles and message in the sand. They stop. He's looking down at it. He looks back up at her, and she's grinning at him. With a laugh, he swoops her into his arms and spins her around.

You turn to look at Bucky, who just looks absolutely lost.

"What... they... huh?" He utters.

"The tests weren't for me. They were for Sharon," You reveal. "And this whole thing was for Steve, not Pietro. Sharon was just really scared of everyone finding out, and wanted Steve to know before anyone else."

Bucky's lips part in shock, and he just stares down at you. "So, you and Pietro..."

"We just sleep together every now and then," You admit. "I just... wanted to bring someone in case you brought someone. Which you did."

"Jean and I aren't... we're just friends," He tells you. "We're working on a film together. I mentioned that I wasn't bringing a plus-one, and she asked if she could come with me so she could network."

"So..." You trail off, your heart racing.

"So..." He echoes, raising a brow. "I still love you. I still want you more than I've ever wanted anything else. If I have to spend another three years proving myself to you, I will."

"Bucky... I... I love you, too," You say, the words finally flying free. "I don't want to waste any more time. But... I have a lot to think about," You tell him. "And a conversation to have with Pietro. But I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. The big day," He says, looking as though he's holding back from doing something he wants to do.

"Yeah. Very big," You say awkwardly. "Well... good night."

He takes a step closer to you, and you forget how to breathe. Looking down at you, he cups your cheek in his hand. "Good night," He replies.

Swallowing thickly, you nod.

How the fuck are you supposed to get any sleep tonight?

The wedding ceremony is beautiful. The love Steve and Sharon have for each other is evident in their vows and the way they look at each other, and you can't help but notice the glow on Sharon's face. However, the reception is when the real fun starts.

You've been pouring water shots for Sharon whenever someone wants to do a round with her, because she isn't ready for everyone to know about the baby yet. As her maid of honor, you've barely had a chance to sit down, having to fight all the small fires that arise to make sure she doesn't realize anything's wrong. You're grateful once the cake's been cut and the dance floor fills up, meaning you can finally relax as the party goes on.

"It's so unfair that you're breaking up with me," Pietro whines as he looks you up and down. "In that dress? You're killing me."

"Get a grip, Maximoff," You say with an eye roll.

"C'mon, let's dance!" He says, pulling you onto the dance floor before you have a chance to say no.

It's an upbeat song at first, one that you can simply clap along to so as not to make a fool of yourself - but then the band switches to a slow ballad.

"Everyone, grab someone you care about and let's dance a little slower," The singer says.

Bucky suddenly appears behind Pietro, placing his hand on his shoulder. "Hey, man. Mind if I steal her from you?"

Only looking slightly intimidated, Pietro nods. "Of course, man. Have fun," He says, giving you a grin before walking away.

As the song begins, a rendition of Can't Help Falling In Love, you smile and shake your head. "Did you request this?" You ask him, placing your hands on his shoulder.

"Who? Me?" He asks with faux innocence as he takes your waist in his hands. "I don't know what you mean."

"Cheesy fucker," You mumble, unable to keep the smile on your face.

This song reminds you of one of the best days you ever spent with him - when you met his family. Losing them was another painful thing you had to deal with when you left Bucky, and getting to see them again is one of the things you're most excited about.

"How is everyone?" You ask him. "Rebecca?"

"She's doing well," He says with a smile. "She's a teacher at our old school."

"I miss her," You tell him. "I miss them all."

"We can see them soon," Bucky tells you. "They've never stopped asking me about you. Ma will probably faint when I tell her you're mine for real this time."

"I'm yours?" You ask teasingly. "Prove it, Mr. Barnes."

He lets out a breathy laugh before moving in closer, holding your body to his, and bringing his lips to yours in a soft kiss. It was everything you've been missing and more. You feel just as safe with him as you did all those years ago.

When he pulls away, he shakes his head. "I can't believe I ever thought I could keep you at a distance. At the start, when I did everything I could to ignore my feelings," He says. "All you ever were was perfect. And I let fear keep me from being with you."

"We both did," You tell him. "And nobody can blame us. We'd never been in love before. Never thought we ever would be. But you came into my life, and... you taught me love. Showed me what it's supposed to be. And I want to spend my life loving you, without judgement, without hiding from the world. I love you, Jamie. No amount of time could have ever changed that. I never moved on, never forgot. I'll always be yours."

"And I'll always be yours," Bucky swears. "I'm gonna look after you, always. I went through life without feeling anything real before I met you. And you made me feel it all. Anger, hate, irritation."

"Damn," You utter lowly.

"Joy, appreciation, love," He adds with a smile. "It's like I was only pretending to feel those things before you made me really feel them. You lit a fire in me. Made me real. You made me real. I want to spend the rest of my life thanking you for that."

"I wish I could tell the Bucky from three and a half years ago that he'd be saying all this one day," You say with a grin. "He'd lose his fucking mind."

"Ah, he was a dick," He says flippantly. "Didn't know a thing."

"He was a dick," You agree, leaning in. "But... he was also really good in bed."

A smirk pulls at his lips. "Yeah? You enjoyed getting hate-fucked by him, didn't you?"

You bite down on your lip, squeezing his shoulders. "So. Much," You utter.

Bucky glances around the thinning-out dance floor and looks back at you. "How about, once we're done here, I take you up to one of the rooms, and fuck you like I hate you?" He suggests, sending a shiver down your spine. "What do you say? For old time's sake?"

With a grin, and ruined panties, you wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him before repeating, "For old time's sake."

super long a/n incominggggg

the fucking end.

so here we are. i am so not emotionally prepared to say goodbye to real people. the past eighteen weeks have felt so, so incredible (eighteen weeks??? they went so quick omg), and exactly what peak tumblr felt like for me, back in the method acting and suburban pleasure days. for those who have been following me for a while, you probably noticed i took an extremely long hiatus starting in about 2023, only really posting the odd one-shot here and there. real people was my first series back and . oh my God. the support was instant and overwhelming. it felt like a community again. my love for writing was reignited and, though there were one or two weeks when i hit writer's block and had to rush to get a chapter out, for the most part it genuinely felt like this series wrote itself. the storyline of actors fake dating has been sitting in my drafts for literal years. since before my marvel era. since before my anakin era. since an era none of you knew... my harry styles era. yep. i had a really weak intro drafted of a harry styles fanfic with the same concept. it was just called "real". and that was in like... 2016/17. so to be here now, almost a decade later, with a full series based on 16-year-old kinana's idea written and complete that I'm so proud of is so damn surreal. I genuinely would not have been able to write this without your love and support so thank you to everyone who commented and reblogged and sent me lovely messages week in and week out. you are the reason this series exists. i hope i can continue to bring you more stories. i might take a short break from posting anything for a few weeks, work on some drafts. maybe think up a new series. and work on some old ones. i'll see you soon. i love you all.

masterlist

buy me a kofi <3

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

pick up your banjo

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

YOU KILLIN' IT GIRL.

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

Hey Guruuuu can you please make a one shot of this picture PLEASEEEE i'm literaly going feralllll the things i wanna do to himmm!!!!!!! can have smut or not it's up to you. No wait maybe a cutesy blurb where they can't get out of bed it's Sunday theyre in Italy on summer break after harry ended/came back from touring and yeahhh

I do kinda wanna do a little blurby for y'all! If I have time I will! I cannot get over this pic!

Also, in case you didn't see it... @musicforastylesrestaurant just posted a blurb based on the pic so go check that out in the meantime :)

xoxo

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

oh my goodness 😭😭😭 he’s so sweet

Ahhh how cute! Delicate hands and smells delicious 🥰 Harry is such a flatterer >you must be joking! it can't be true! LOL! I love that so much. What a cutie 💕

xoxo

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

real people

chapter fifteen

18+

you're popular among horror fans. he's well-respected among film critics. though you work in the same industry, you couldn't be more different - but your managers think a pr romance is just what your careers need.

warning: actor!bucky x actress!reader, mature themes, enemies to lovers, fake dating, implied mention of child abuse, fluff, smut.

Series Masterlist

A/N: Exciting news - thanks to the lovely @wifeofbarnes for inspiring me, we have a series playlist! 2.5 hours of real people coded music for you to listen to as you read :-)

It's not your first time in a foreign country by yourself, but even back when you were a teenager getting your first big break in the industry, you weren't this nervous to be flown out across the world. Ljubljana is a gorgeously charming city, with its cobbled streets and old buildings. Walking to the AirBnB is like walking through a fairytale, the best part of it being that nobody recognizes you. Even now that you've taken your hat and face mask off, none of the locals walking the evening streets spare you a second glance, and there aren't many tourists at all outside of the summer season.

The AirBnB is gorgeous; a small cottage on the edge of town surrounded by forestry. You make your way to the door and, as you were told, it's unlocked. When you walk in, Bucky stops pacing and turns to face you, relief flooding his features.

"Shit," He whispers. "You're late."

"And you're paranoid," You reply just as hushed.

Bucky rushes over to you, takes your face in his hands, and kisses you. His kiss tells you he missed you just as much as you missed him, his hand moving to take the duffel bag off your shoulder while his other grabs your hip.

You pull away from his lips to catch your breath and say, "Sorry I'm late, but it's been a long time since I've flown commercial, and there was a whole thing with my bag-"

"It's okay. You're here now," He cuts in, taking a moment to look you up and down while holding your hands, as though he needs to prove to himself that you're really here. Here, where you really shouldn't be.

While you've got a short break between Jagged Edges promotion, Bucky's still halfway through filming his thriller-romance with Natasha. They're out in Slovenia for three weeks filming the remaining scenes, and he didn't want to go that long without seeing you, so he booked this AirBnB and flew you out - first class on a commercial flight; private would've drawn too much attention - so you could spend his two days off together.

"How are you feeling? Are you tired? Hungry?" He asks you while leading you through to the kitchen. "I've started up on some dinner for us - but if you wanna take a nap, first-"

"No, I'm starving," You admit as the aroma of onions and peppers takes you over. "God, that smells good. What are you making?"

"Im trying to recreate my chef's pasta; I know you like it," He tells you as he grabs a wooden spoon and stirs whatever is in the pot on the stove.

"Wow, carbs while filming?" You ask teasingly as you join him, wrapping your arm around his torso. "That's very thoughtful. Thank you."

Just then, your phone rings. You plan to hang it up straight away, but when you see it's Pepper, you know that isn't an option. With your ongoing case against Thor, there might be something important she needs to tell you, so you take a step away from Bucky.

"Sorry, I gotta take this," You whisper before picking up the phone. "Hey, Pepper, what's up?"

"Just checking in," She sings down the phone. "Where are you? You turned your location off."

"Oh, right, I'm just... in Mexico for a couple of days," You answer, ignoring Bucky's smirk. "Just wanted a break from everything, so I booked a small villa to myself for some peace and quiet."

"Without the jet?" She wonders, making you inwardly curse yourself.

"Uh, I drove," You improv quickly, ignoring Bucky's snort.

"You drove from New York to Mexico?" Pepper questions you. "Y/N, why are you lying to me?"

"Oh, I must've got cut off - I was saying, I drove to the airport, realized I hadn't asked Sanny to get the jet ready, so just decided to fly commercial," You explain, hoping you sound believable. "It's amazing what a great disguise a hat and face mask make."

"Right. Anyway, so you know how we said you were gonna stay lowkey during the court hearings, until it all blows over? Subtle and unproblematic, out of the public eye as much as possible aside from Jagged Edges promo?" She asks, her tone putting you on edge.

"Uh... yeah?" You reply carefully, glad she's moved on from asking how you got to Mexico but just as concerned about her next words.

"Well, what the fuck? I mean, posting a selfie on Instagram with Deja Vu by Olivia Rodrigo playing in the background?" She asks with annoyance in her tone. "That is not subtle and unproblematic. It's messy!"

"I like that song!" You claim innocently.

"Stop it. You know what you're doing when you post things like that," She scolds you. "There's no agreement in place with Natasha's management for a messy love triangle or drama. Don't tell me you developed a crush on Bucky for real? Or is it just for media attention?"

You jump slightly when Bucky squeezes your ass as he walks by you, and you let out a soft laugh. "Maybe a bit of both?" You say to her.

"No more Instagram stories," Pepper orders sternly. "And remember, we have the pretrial on Friday. Hopefully his lawyer isn't a complete asshole and doesn't drag this out any longer."

"Yeah," You mumble, fiddling with the hem of your shirt. The reminder of the case makes you feel sick to your stomach. Once you hang up, you turn to Bucky, who's mixing the cooked pasta in with the sauce.

"Everything okay?" He asks with his eyes on the food.

"She was just angry at me for posting on my story," You tell him with an eye roll as you take your position back by his side. Though you want to hold onto him tighter than ever before, you don't want to start something you're afraid you wouldn't be able to finish.

"Hey," Bucky mumbles as he wraps an arm around you. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Looking up at him, into his eyes, you allow yourself to trust him. He won't be mad. It's Bucky. He loves you. "Um... I was just thinking..." You trail off, unable to maintain eye contact with him. "I might not be... I don't think I'll be able to... sleep with you, during this trip. I just... with everything going on with... Thor, I just feel... I don't think I can-"

"Hey, hey, look at me," He says putting down the wooden spoon and instead cupping your face in his hands. "I would never want you to feel uncomfortable. Would never make you do anything you don't want to do. You can and should always be honest with me, you know that."

"I know, but..." You wince. "We haven't seen each other in a while, and we won't see each other until next month now-"

"That's not why I asked you to come here. You know that, right?" He asks as his brows furrow. "I just needed to see you. To be in the same room as you is all I need to feel sane, and like myself. I'm not... I'm not just doing this for sex. I wouldn't be risking everything we're risking just for that. I love you."

Much to your surprise, you don't doubt him for a second. Though you've never been in love before, not even close, and you never thought you'd trust anyone enough to experience it, you somehow feel it for him. And it feels glorious. To let go, to give in, and to risk destruction. Even if he was to ever hurt you, you'd be glad he allowed you to experience the feeling of being loved and cared for for once in your life. You know that's bad - unhealthy, too - you're slipping into the realm of infatuation; the thing you've spent countless hours lecturing Gwen about and telling yourself you'd never allow yourself to be held hostage by. But you trust him enough to know he wouldn't take advantage of the fact that you would do absolutely anything for him.

"What are you thinking?" He asks while pulling open the cutlery drawer.

You shake your head as he takes out a fork and stabs it through the pasta. He blows on the steaming bite while using his free arm to hook around your waist and lift you up onto the counter. Once he's happy that the bite is sufficiently cool enough, he holds it out to you, and you part your lips, allowing him to feed you.

Immediately, your senses are rewarded. You nod whole chewing, your eyes fluttering shut. "Mmm."

"I recognize that look," Bucky utters with a smug tone.

You gently kick his leg before opening your eyes and swallowing. "That's better than Millie's," You say, his talent in the kitchen making you even more attracted to him.

"You remember her name?" He asks while waiting for his bite to cool down.

"I remember a lot about that day," You say, raising a brow. "In particular, I remember you wearing nothing but a towel. Tease."

"I remember you yelling at me," He counters with a smirk. "Trying to stay focused on how angry you were while ignoring how turned on you were."

"Ha! Turned on?" You retort. "You wish."

Taking his bite, he nods, responding once he's swallowed. "You were so close to kissing me that day," Bucky claims while standing between your legs.

"And you would've rejected me," You point out bluntly.

Saying nothing for a few moments, he contemplates it before saying, "I don't think I would have. I'd have kissed you back."

"Liar!" You exclaim. "Remember; this was back at the peak of your pretentiousness and arrogance. And hatred for me."

"Hatred's pretty strong-"

"You would've pulled away and laughed in my face," You say sternly.

Bucky shrugs, pulling his lips down. "I guess we'll never know," He says lowly, before leaning in closer. "But you know I'd never reject one of your kisses now, ever."

"Ever?" You wonder. "Not even if... we broke up?"

"Nope," He answers quickly. "No matter what."

"So, let's say I dump you in a few months, real awful, just a short text ending it, calling you a terrible lover, etcetera," You hypothetize. "Five years later, we bump into each other at a party, and I plant one on you, no warning."

His lips pull up into a smile. "Kiss you back," He says simply.

"You wouldn't," You fire back at him.

"I would, because I'd still be madly in love with you," Bucky tells you teasingly, patting your thighs. "Would you kiss me back?"

You don't even have to think about it. "I don't think there's any way I'd move on from you enough to turn down your kiss," You admit.

"Promise?" He asks with a hopeful look.

With narrow eyes, you rest your hands on his shoulders. "Sure, Mr. Barnes," You say, before tilting your head. "Now, enough talk - how about you carry on feeding me pasta, and then we can find a cheesy Hallmark movie to watch, and I'll let you make all the pretentious comments you want?"

Bucky leans in and gives you a soft kiss. "Sounds good to me, baby."

The next morning, you wake up to the smell of fresh coffee. It takes you a second to remember where you are and why, but then you smell Bucky's cologne on your shoulder, and you immediately grin to yourself. One day, you might actually get used to waking up and smelling like him. You hope you're given the opportunity to get used to him.

Once you've washed up, you make your way to the kitchen where he's stood over the stove again. "Y'know, I could get used to having you in my kitchen every day," You sing out from the doorway.

Bucky turns to look at you and smiles. "And I could get used to seeing you wake up in my t-shirt," He returns. "I hope you don't mind scrambled."

"My favorite," You tell him. Even though you'd usually prefer sunny-side-up, whatever he does is your new favorite. God, you're turning soft. You meet him at the stove and hug his bare torso, stealing the warmth from his skin.

"I hope you slept well," He whispers before kissing the top of your head.

"Best sleep ever," You tell him truthfully.

"Good. Eat up and get dressed; we're leaving soon," He tells you while plating up the food.

"Where are we going?" You ask, your interest piqued.

"You'll see," Bucky says cryptically.

You swat his ass before taking the fork from his outstretched hand. "I need at least a hint so I know what to wear," You retort.

His hand trails down your back and to your ass which he returns the favor to before he says, "A pretty dress will do."

You settle on a short, sage green, cotton dress and your white converse, seeing as Bucky implied you'd be walking for a while. It isn't too warm but the sun is shining as you allow him to lead you through the cobblestone streets.

He takes your hand in his and holds it while you walk together. It feels odd to be in public without worrying about being caught together or swarmed by fans, as though you and Bucky are just normal people. Normal people, with regular lives, and regular problems.

A short walk away from the cottage takes you up to some fields. "Wildflower meadows," Bucky tells you. "Gotta be my favorite thing about this country."

You can't help but agree with him. A sea of colorful flowers fill the field around you, taking your breath away with their beauty. Their sweet smell in the air, not too overbearing, is like nothing you've ever smelt before. While you take in the view, Bucky wraps his arms around you from behind your back, holding you close to his chest.

"I've only ever walked past one of these meadows," He tells you. "I didn't wanna walk through one without you."

You turn to face him and rest your hands on his shoulders, before getting onto your tip-toes, leaning up and kissing him. He wraps his arms around your waist and picks you up so you can kiss him without craning your neck, and you're thankful for the instant comfort. Just as you begin to lose yourself into the kiss, you hear a gentle tinkling sound, the kind that makes you think of stars flickering and sparks flying. You pull away from his lips and ask, "Am I going insane, or do you hear that, too?"

His head turns to the side as he carefully puts you down onto your feet. You look to where he's staring, past the fences of the meadow and into the next field over, where a small group of cows are being walked by a farmer. The source of the tinkling sound becomes apparent to you - the bells around their necks, some of them pausing to graze.

"Oh, my gosh," You whisper, taking a step forward. "That is so cute!"

You watch them meander across the field calmly with a wide smile on your face. When you turn back to Bucky, you see him holding up his phone at you.

"Barnes, are you taking photos of me without permission?" You ask with a raised brow as you walk back over to him.

He moves his phone down and grins as he taps on his screen. "Just give me a sec to add this to my secret album," He utters, making your eyes widen.

"You have an album of photos of me?" You ask him incredulously.

"No. Of cows," Bucky says flatly.

"Show me!" You demand, clinging onto his bicep.

Letting out a half-hearted sigh, he pulls up the photoalbum titled with the initial of your first name - and you're shocked at how many photos are saved in there.

"Two hundred and eighty-three photos? Of me? In your phone? In a special little secret little album?" You ask, your voice getting higher in pitch with each question.

"That isn't a huge amount-"

You take the phone from him and scroll through the pictures, taken aback. There's photos of you eating, watching TV, staring up at the Eiffel Tower, laughing with his sister, one of you brushing your teeth- even a few of you sleeping.

"You creep," You mumble, unable to keep the smile off your face before you realize something. "Wait... these are from... these first ones are from, like, August! When you hated me!"

A sheepish grin sits on his lips. "A good photographer can separate the subject from his feelings for the subject. Especially when the subject is as beautiful as you."

"Cheesy fucker," You whisper, handing his phone back to him. "You've been in love with me this whole time, haven't you?"

Bucky snorts at that and puts his phone away. "I wouldn't go that far," He claims. "I've always thought you were beautiful, you know that."

"But I didn't know you were so obsessed with me!" You point out.

"Obsessed is a strong word-"

"Two-hundred and eighty-three, Barnes," You cut him off curtly.

He tilts his head and narrows his eyes, thinking for a second before sighing. "Alright, fine. But if we're talking obsession, you were the one with posters of me in your bedroom-"

"Oh, really? You're going there?" You laugh. "That's a low blow, Barnes. I was a child."

"So was I!" He returns.

"You were just a celebrity crush," You say, grabbing hold of his shoulders. "Maybe you still are."

"Oh, yeah?" Bucky asks with a smirk as he takes your waist in his hands. "So, you only want me because you've seen me on the big screen?"

"Mhm," You nod, playing along. "You're a big household name. That could do a lot for my career."

"Right. You're just using me for publicity?" He asks, squeezing your waist.

"Yep. And..." You begin, leaning up closer until your lips brush against his. "Your dick's pretty nice, too."

A soft chuckle escapes his mouth. "Yeah?"

"Yeah," You reply with a whisper. "I wanna touch it."

His throat bobs as he gulps. "Are you sure?" He asks you carefully.

"More than I am about anything," You answer truthfully. Though you weren't in the best headspace last night or prepared for anything sexual, the last 12 hours with Bucky have put you at complete peace. You pull on one of his earlobes. "Are you sure?"

"I've been hard since I saw you in that dress," He admits, before tilting his head and frowning. "Actually, since I saw you in my t-shirt."

With a laugh and a well-stroked ego, you trail your right hand down his shirt and to the zipper of his pants. Pulling it down and unbuttoning them, you gently push your fingers under his boxers, gasping slightly when you feel just how hard he is. His cock throbs as you take it your hand and he sucks in a sharp breath. You look down and pull it out fully before spitting on it and looking back up at him. As you start stroking him up and down, you kiss him deeply, your stomach flipping with excitement when you hear his low moans.

"Hold on," He utters, even though it kills him to interrupt you. He steals a glance at the next field over where the farmer's still walking away, his cows getting smaller and smaller in the distance. Bucky takes your arms and gently leads you over to a big willow tree which he pushes you up against. "A little more privacy."

Continuing rubbing his cock, you raise a brow. "Maybe he's a voyeur and you just ruined his fun," You say teasingly.

A breathy laugh leaves his mouth. "I don't want him to see what I'm about to do to you," Bucky says lowly as his hand moves up to your throat. "Nobody gets to see you like that. Nobody but me."

You playfully roll your eyes. "Someone's getting possessive," You mutter.

He uses his grip on your neck to tilt your head up. "And I'd like to see anyone try and dispute the fact that you are mine," Bucky states, using his free hand to grab your ass. "All of you. You're mine."

"And are you mine?" You ask him with a whisper. "All of you?"

"Always," He replies without missing a beat.

"And not just when your dick's in my hand?" You press, giving him a gentle squeeze.

He sucks in a gasp. "Fuck. No. Always," He swears.

You hum in response, moving your hand agonisingly slow up and down his shaft.

"You're killing me," He groans, resting his forehead against yours.

"Sorry," You say innocently, abruptly stopping your movements and letting go of his dick.

He groans again, his eyes narrowing before he picks you up and lays you down amongst the flowers.

"Oh," You say with surprise. "We're doing this here?"

"We're doing this here," Bucky grumbles. He cups your face in one hand before squeezing your cheeks, forcing your mouth open, and slipping his tongue into it. He kisses you deeply while settling between your legs. You make out for a while, to the sound of birds singing and a gentle breeze flowing. Bucky slowly rubs his hard cock against your panties, the heat between your legs growing. Reaching down, you push your panties to the side, allowing him to rub against your pussy with no barriers. You shudder as your clit is brushed by the tip of his cock, every inch of your body craving him.

"Please," You utter into his mouth. "Please, baby. Be a good boy."

A breathy groan leaves his lips and he slowly pushes into you, pulling a whimper from you.

"Oh, that's it," Bucky moans lowly, resting his forehead against yours as he inches into you. "Always take me so well."

You arch your back and throw your head back as he fills you up, crying out when he starts thrusting in and out. His demeanour shifts suddenly and he's pinning your hands down, fucking you faster as groans leave his mouth.

"Jamie," You begin, using all your will power. "Slow down, baby. I wanna make it last."

Though it kills him, he does as you say, knowing you're right.

"Good job," You say with a grin as he releases your hands. "I'm so proud of you."

His body practically convulses and he sucks in a sharp breath, stilling his movements. "I'll last longer than last time, I promise," He says with a strained voice. "Fuck. What have you done to me?"

You laugh with him still deep inside you, causing your pussy to flutter and tighten around him. Bucky's eyes widen for a second and he pulls out of you, shaking his head.

"Shit. I'm gonna - fuck - I'm just gonna use my hands first," He says between breaths. "I can't... you're fucking insane."

You laugh even harder at his defeat, but you stop when he instead pushes two fingers into you. Though they're nowhere near as thick as his cock, he knows just how to curl them inside you to make your legs shake. And shake, they do. "Oh, fuck, Jamie," You cry out loudly as your arms spread out on either side of you, your hands grabbing fistfuls of grass and flowers.

"You're so beautiful," Bucky utters as his fingers fuck in and out of you. His free hand pulls down the top of your dress, revealing your tits to him which he leans down and sucks. Your hips thrust up as your eyes roll back, complete and total pleasure washing over you. For a second, as you cum, you can't hear, unsure as to whether you're screaming his name or just whispering it.

At first, as you begin to come down, all you can hear is your heartbeat, them his voice slowly becomes clearer. "That's my good girl," Bucky coos as he plants kisses all over your face, making your heart flutter with each one. "Did so well for me."

"James," You say, reaching your hand out to grab his bicep. "Never leave me."

He laughs, and you hope he knows you aren't joking.

"Think you're ready for me now?" You ask as your breathing finally reaches a regular pace. "Or are you gonna cum as soon as you're inside me?"

He winces, settling between your legs again. "Depends on whether you call me a good boy again," He says. "I suggest you refrain."

"But you are my good boy," You whine, cupping his face in your hands as you grin up at him. "Make me proud and don't cum straight away. Can you do that for mommy?"

His eyes flutter shut and he takes in a deep breath. "I'll do my best, baby," He mumbles.

"Excuse me?" You ask with a raised brow, unimpressed.

Bucky's eyes open and they're full of light. "I'm sorry, mommy," He says, unable to hold back any longer as he returns his cock to your pussy and pushes it in. "I'll be good for you. I promise."

With that, he slowly starts fucking you. As you look up at him, you swear the clouds in the sky form around him like a halo. He's looking down at you as if you're the only thing that matters to him, and deep down, you hope that you are.

Bucky groans, stroking your face as he thrusts a little harder. "I love you," He whispers, and it makes your cunt tighten around him. So he says it again. And again. And again.

"Jamie," You cry out, tugging on his hair with one hand and cupping his chin with the other. Your fingers slide up and into his mouth, and he sucks on them with his eyes burning into yours.

"I'm yours," He swears. "As long as I'm alive, I'm yours. No matter what. I don't wanna live without you. I can't."

You wish you could speak coherently - give him back some poetry about how much he means to you - but all you can do is moan and cry. It's enough for Bucky, though, for him to see the look on your face as he draws out another orgasm from you. His thumb rubs circles on your clit, making your legs freeze as your chest shudders. A breath of relief mixed with pleasure leaves your mouth, and you believe a part of your soul leaves you in this moment, joining his.

"That's it, my gorgeous girl," He utters, pressing chaste kisses against your lips.

"Jamie," You whimper, your vision blurring. "I love you."

His jaw clenches and his thrusts lose rhythm. His hips stutter as he cums inside you, chanting your name like a prayer. For a few moments, he rests his body against yours, careful not to put all his weight on you as you both catch your breaths and float back down to Earth. His face is in your neck, lips pressing kissing to your skin, hands finding yours as your fingers intertwine.

Once he's breathing normally again, he sits up and stares down at you before reaching out to the ground. He plucks flowers from the earth around you and places them in your hair, before taking his phone out of his pocket. Then, he pulls the top of your dress back up before taking a photo of you. You can't help but smile. It's the first time he's taking a picture of you without having to do it secretly. He can show you exactly how much you mean to him without being concerned about how you'd react.

You take his free hand and bring it down to your chest, making him grab your boob before he takes another picture. I'm yours. Yours to touch.

Once he's satisfied with the pictures, he lays down next to you.

"We haven't taken one together yet," You point out. "A real one. Not for social media."

He turns the camera and holds it up before taking a few selfies of the two of you.

"You need flowers," You mumble before taking some of the ones from your hair and putting them in his. He takes some more photos and then puts his phone down.

You aren't sure how much time passes as you both stare up at the clouds, watching them move. Pointing out the ones that look like dogs and cars, and one that looks like a dragon. He's holding your hand and you're hugging his arm.

"What changed?" You suddenly find yourself asking.

"Hmm?" He responds.

"That day I told you how I felt. When I poured my heart out to you and you ripped it up and threw it back at me," You say dramatically, turning your head to face him. "You said you weren't ready for a relationship. That you were prioritizing your career, or whatever the fuck. What changed your mind?"

Bucky releases a heavy sigh. "When I was a kid, my mom would tell me how she stopped acting when she met my dad. She probably didn't mean to, but I felt the... the resentment she held for him. She loved him, and still does, but a small part of her blamed him for snuffing out her potential," He tells you. "She felt as though, to start and maintain a family with him, she couldn't be flying across the world to film. Going to events on Saturday nights. Being away from home for so long. She had to make a choice. Acting or family. She didn't regret choosing family, or at least she never made me feel like she did - but there was always a part of her that wondered. That dreamt of herself making her dreams come true. Working with the greats. Becoming one of the greats. That terrifying, nauseating feeling that you've missed out - that you've lost out on something life-changing? It's crippling. Haunts you. And if you're not careful, you end up resenting the life you were given. And I've never been a careful man." He turns to meet your eyes. "That's how I felt since I was a teenager. There was a point, somewhere between Season 4 and 5 of Sunset, that I realized it was something I could take seriously and not just a fun summer job. And when I realized I could take it further, push myself further, it was all I wanted. I saw love as a distraction. A career-killer. I focused on my craft, had to prove myself as more than just the kid on that teen show - refused to be typecast. It was hard work, proving myself. And once I got to a level where I was respected by my peers, by directors I spent my life idolizing... I knew I couldn't fuck up. Couldn't give myself any reason to slow down or get distracted. So I shut myself off, wouldn't let anyone in. They tried, and there were times when I might have been tempted to take things further than just a brief night together... but I couldn't. Then... you."

"Me?" You echo, hanging onto his every word.

"Yes, you," He answers, a smile pulling at his lips. "My darling, gorgeous girl. I don't know how I ever walked out of your apartment that night. Regretted it straight away. Living without you for those first few weeks... It was hell. Knowing you were hurt because of me. I realized that it wasn't a choice. You were it - you are it for me. I don't need the accolades. The awards. I don't need the world to love me. Just you."

You trace his nose with your finger, trailing it down to his chin. "I love you, Jamie. I never... never thought I'd say that to anyone and mean it. I always figured that if my parents couldn't love me... if they didn't think I was anything special or worthy, how could anyone else?" You admit, feeling that sharp tingling in your nose as your vision blurs. "They're the people who should love you unconditionally, you know? They should think you're perfect, no matter how many flaws you have. But mine didn't. And it's taken me a long time to realize that that was on them, not me. They were the ones that were broken inside. They projected their insecurities onto me. Hurt me so they could feel power and control for once in their sorry lives. I remember talking to some director about it years ago. She told me to make sure I never opened up about my trauma to anyone because they'd use it against me. That terrified me. The thought that I could meet someone who treated me the way they did. Would I accept it because it felt like home? So, like you, I didn't see falling in love as an option. It would just open me up to getting hurt again. But... you cut me open. I didn't even realize I was falling until it was too late. Or maybe I did, but just ignored it because it felt too good. And maybe I... Gwen says I forgave you too quickly. That I should've shown more self-respect. Don't let a man tell you he doesn't want you twice. She got all that shit from me, so I can't even blame her. But I trust you, Jamie. Maybe it's stupid of me, or maybe I don't care what happens in the future. I'm enjoying myself too much right now to consider self-preservation."

He takes in your words, listening attentively with his hand resting on your thigh. "I'll never hurt you again," He promises lowly. "I'll never walk out on you again. I'll always choose you, and always be on your side."

You smile lazily at him. "Til death do us part?" You ask teasingly.

"Don't try me. I'll take you Vegas right now," Bucky says without a hint of humor in his tone.

"Ew. Something more classy, please," You say with a grimace.

He pulls his lips down as he thinks. "Right here in this meadow?" He suggests.

With a snort, you nod and add, "With the cows as our witnesses."

"Sweet," He whispers with a grin.

"We've already consummated it," You point out. "Is it bad for the bride to already have the groom's cum dripping-"

"Definitely bad," He cuts in. "We won't tell the cows that."

"Alright. I think I feel a bug crawling up my leg," You say. "We should get up before it reaches somewhere I really don't want it to."

"Okay," Bucky replies with a laugh before standing up and pulling you up to your feet.

You flick the bug off your calf and take his hand in yours. He pulls you in for a tight hug instead, and you've never felt so safe or at home. After a few moments, he pulls out the key to the cottage and moves closer to the tree before carving into the trunk. You watch him with a stupidly big smile on your face, feeling giddy like a teenager.

If only it could be like this all the time. You swallow down the lump in your throat when you remember you have to fly back to New York tomorrow and prepare for court. Forget about all that. Right now, all that matters is You and Bucky. 4 Ever.

fun fact: i randomly chose Ljubljana as the setting for this chapter then kinda hit writer's block. then, super coincidentally, a coworker tells me about how she went on vacation, traveling across europe, including - you guessed it - a short stay in slovenia. she told me about the cobblestone streets and wildflower meadows, how she suddenly heard this tinkling sound that ended up being the bells on cows, and how peaceful and untouched by tourism the whole place is. it was fate! so thank you for inspiring me with stories of your travels, sharon. this one's for you. drop a W in the chat for sharon.

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buy me a kofi <3

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

MAKE AMERICA GAY AGAIN 🏳️‍🌈 @ Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

Has anyone figured out what’s so viscerally wrong with this woman yet

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

marriage is insane. people will really be like "if you really love me youll sign this legal document binding our finances together"

[itjustkindahappenedreally]

real people

chapter fourteen

18+

you're popular among horror fans. he's well-respected among film critics. though you work in the same industry, you couldn't be more different - but your managers think a pr romance is just what your careers need.

content warning: actor!bucky x actress!reader, mature themes, fake dating, enemies to lovers, angst, smut.

Series Masterlist

THREE MONTHS LATER

Bucky leans back in his chair with a lazy grin on his face. The sun is shining on him, reflecting off his sunglasses as he thumbs the rim of his beer. "I didn't think I'd feel like this so soon," He says, shaking his head. "Not about you."

"You've surprised us both," Natasha replies, smiling back at him. "Y'know, for someone with such a tough exterior, I thought you'd be much harder to crack. But here you are, talking baby names."

"I'm not talking baby names," He claims pointedly. "Just mentioned that it's a name I like."

"Mhm," She hums, tilting her head. "If we do this - and I mean really do this - everything between us will change."

Bucky nods and pushes his sunglasses up onto his head so he can look her in the eyes when he says, "I know, baby. And I'm ready."

"Cut!"

Someone runs up to touch up Bucky's hair while the director joins the two actors on set and begins to give them some notes. When he's done, he calls for a five minute break.

"This is gonna be a long day, Barney," Natasha says with a sigh, still smiling at Bucky.

Usually, he'd smile back and return the sentiment, maybe even compliment her acting or ask how she's feeling about the scene - but ever since they went public as a 'couple' a month ago, Bucky can't stand her. They were good friends before the contract, but now whenever he looks at her, he's just reminded of everything he isn't allowed to have: you. He's trapped, forced to do what he's told and to pretend he's in love with Natasha, when on the inside he's dying.

Missing you physically hurts him. He feels your absence like a hole in his chest. He hasn't spoken to you since New Year's Eve and hasn't seen you in even longer. He knows you're doing well - asks Steve for updates almost every day - but he never thought his heart could have broken the way it did when you said you couldn't be with him.

"Alright, let's get going," The director yells out, pulling Bucky out of his slump. "Places, people. Lights. Camera."

"Action!" Steve yells out while you try to keep a straight face with the wind whipping through your hair.

"Have you - shit - are you tired of watching the same boring old movies?" You ask as Steve films you on his phone, trying to speak louder than the sound of the waves crashing against the boat. "Need some excitement in your life? Thrills? Laughs?"

Steve flips the camera and says, "I know I do!" before flipping the camera back to you.

"Then I've got the film for you: Jagged Edges - coming to a theatre near you this weekend!" You continue.

Steve walks over to stand beside you and holds the phone in front of both of you. "This weekend?" He asks with faux shock.

"That's right - this weekend!" You exclaim. "So grab a friend-"

Steve wraps his arm around your shoulder. "Or lover."

"Or even better, go alone - you're not gonna wanna miss out," You finish before Steve stops recording.

Immediately, you let out a sigh of relief as you drop the fake smile and enthusiasm. Steve takes his arm back off of you while your PR assistant, Emma, walks up to you, using her hand to shield her eyes from the sun. "That was perfect. Let's break for lunch," She says as her hair blows in the wind. "We can get some more content filmed before the interview later on."

It doesn't feel great that you and Steve have to act overly flirty with each other to help with the film's publicity, but he's a kind soul that is incapable of making you feel uncomfortable, which is a refreshing change from some of your previous male co-stars.

"Hey, Steve," You call out to him, grabbing his arm before he has a chance to leave. "How's... uh..."

He gives you a knowing look and moves closer to you. "Bucky's doing alright," He replies, and doesn't give you any more information- because you made it very clear that you don't want to know any more past the fact that he's living and breathing since you started asking Steve for updates three months ago. All you need to know is that Bucky is okay; whether or not he's asking about you isn't relevant.

You're also terrified to hear that Bucky isn't concerned about you or as maimed from the break-up as you still are. Not a minute goes by that you don't think about him, and the only thing stopping you from losing your mind is the comforting thought that he's hurting just as much as you. It might be delusional, but it protects your feelings, and Steve knows that, too.

"Thanks," You mumble.

"You know... if you wanted to speak to him-"

"Steve, stop," You cut him off curtly, as hard as it is. "I don't want to know."

The Oscars have always been one of the most exciting nights of the year for you, but tonight, all you feel is dread. Though you weren't nominated for anything - screw them for snubbing your performance in The Sixth Night - you are presenting an award. And, of course, it's for the one and only category that Bucky fucking Barnes is nominated for.

"It's not a sure thing that he'll win," Gwen assures you. "I mean, he's never won an Oscar before, and he's given way better performances than he did in Harsh Truths. What are the chances this is the year the wins?"

"In case you haven't noticed, the universe loves fucking me over," You mutter bitterly.

"Oh, please," She scoffs with an eye roll. "You're rich and famous; handing an award to your ex-situationship while wearing a custom Schiaparelli before being driven back to your penthouse is hardly anything to cry over."

Knowing she's right, you simply purse your lips and look around the bustling hall. It's that awkward period of waiting as you've already walked the red carpet and are now waiting for the show to start, while celebrities and other industry workers slowly populate the venue. It's the first time you've brought Gwen with you - usually you come solo, but the thought of being alone while having to watch Bucky and Natasha play happy families makes you feel sick. The general public and media still hate you for supposedly cheating on their golden boy, and Thor isn't making court any nicer an experience than it would be, so you feel like you could fall apart any second.

"Hey. You're okay," Gwen says calmly, recognizing the look on your face. She takes your hands in hers and moves her face closer to yours. "This is going to be a good night, okay? I'm here with you- oh, my God, that's Peter Parker."

Your face falls as you glare at her. "G, I swear to God-"

"Okay, okay, I'm not distracted at all," She assures you, tightening her grip on your hands. "I'm here for you. We're gonna have a fun night. And maybe I'll get a selfie with Peter Parker should the opportunity arise."

With an eye roll, you shake your head. "Y'know, if you really want to meet him, I could-"

"I don't want to force it. It has to be fate," She claims with a dreamy look on her face. "Invisible string theory doesn't involve a best friend pulling the string for you."

While she's talking you turn back to look at the door, only to see the last person you wanted to see walking in. And worse, he's got his arm around Natasha's waist while he laughs at something she says. Your stomach drops and your heart pounds in your chest, and for a few seconds, you can't heat anything except your own heartbeat. He looks well - healthy. Worse, he looks happy. Is he really that good at faking it?

He probably didn't have to fake it at all with her, even at the start. They've been close friends for years - he could probably fall in love with her much quicker than he did with you. He probably already is in love with her. It's much easier to go from friends to lovers than enemies to lovers. There's no fighting or resentment. Fuck. He probably loves her.

"Y/N, your eyes are leaking," Gwen points out flatly as she dabs at your cheeks. "Don't let that asshole ruin your makeup."

"He isn't an asshole," You mumble, every part of your body hurting as you see them walking in like a genuine couple.

"He had his chance and he blew it," Gwen says sternly. "He's an asshole."

Bucky and Natasha are walking past you so you quickly look at Gwen and pretend to be in deep conversation. You're fine without him. Show him you're fine without him.

Once they're gone, you can breathe again, but you still have that nauseous feeling in your stomach and a stinging behind your eyes.

It isn't too long before it's finally time for the show to begin, and your heart beats a little faster the more categories they get through. You're backstage, getting your hair and makeup touched up while someone talks you through the process of presenting. You can't focus on a word they say, your mind racing with the possibility of you having to share the stage with Bucky. Though you would be nothing but proud and happy for him to win his first Oscar, you'd rather not have to be that close to him.

"Alright, ready to go?" The stage assistant asks you as she walks you over to the thick curtains. "I'll let you know when it's time."

Breathe in. Breathe out. This is just another performance. You look good. Great, even. He's not gonna win. He's not gonna win.

"That's your cue," The assistant says as she subtly pushes you through the curtains.

The crowd bursts into applause as you walk out onto the stage and to the podium with a wide smile plastered onto your face. "Actors like to think we're the centres of the story, but the truth is, the centre only matters if the edges are strong," You read off the teleprompter as you try not to cringe. "The nominees for this award are the ones who carry the weight - challenging the lead and often stealing the scene. The nominees tonight do so without fuss, without ego, and usually with smaller trailers - but their love for the craft is evident in their performances. Here are the nominees for Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role."

The video starts playing on the television screens behind and above you showing each of the nominees along with clips from their respective films. You keep your eyes on your audience the whole time so it isn't obvious if you recoil when Bucky's clip from Harsh Truths plays - but you still hear his voice and it sends shivers down your spine. Focus on something else. Flowers. Butterflies. Rainbows.

Once the nominees have all been shown, you prepare to open the envelope while the audience applauds. "And the Oscar goes to..." You say before you open the envelope. Your mouth goes dry when you see the name on the card but you keep on a brave face, refusing to give the Internet any ammo for rumors. "Bucky Barnes."

Music swells as you pick up the Oscar from the podium before taking a step back. Bucky's in the second row, so you can see Natasha plant a kiss on his lips and hug him tight. Your stomach is in knots. That should be you, proud of your man, source of his motivation. Stop. Get a grip.

He walks onto the stage and when your eyes meet, it feels like the hundreds of people in the crowd fade into nothing. You hold the trophy out to him and he takes it with a gracious smile, giving you a subtle smile before doing the last thing you expected - hugging you.

"Well done," You mumble into his ear before pulling away and stepping to the side, allowing him to give his speech.

"Wow," He breathes out. "This is absolutely unexpected. Filming Harsh Truths was one of the best experiences of my life. I wanna thank the director, Steven Grant, for pushing me to do my best and bringing this incredible story to life. I'd also like to thank my amazing agent, Carol Danvers, for putting up with me and for constantly championing me. I wouldn't be here right now if not for you. And thank you to Ma, and Dad, and Becky and everyone at home - I hope you'll find my work a little less boring, now. And, uh, finally, I just wanna... I wanna thank the woman I love. Not only do you make me want to be a better actor, you make me a better actor, and I could never adequately repay you for that. Thank you."

Your blood runs cold. Is that motherfucker talking about you? Why didn't he just say Natasha's name? Why cause you to overthink in the most pathetic way?

The music plays again and you do your best to rush off stage without making it obvious that you are aiming to avoid him. And it works - he's stopped by the stage manager backstage while you're free to return to your seat without so much as another glance at him.

The afterparty is just as rough. If not, worse, because Gwen's ditched you to go flirt with Peter Parker, instead. A few people have tried to start conversation with you but you're so numb and down that they gave up after a few minutes. You can't get his words out of your mind. The woman I love. They echo in your head until they're all you can hear. Why would he speak so vaguely, knowing how you feel? Knowing it would kill you?

You thought you were safe here - that he had been invited to the ultra-exclusive party that only winners got invited to - but now he's walking into the room and you're hoping the ground will open up and swallow you whole. Shit. And of course, she's on his arm, looking as perfect as ever. He's smiling back at her - genuinely smiling. She suddenly pulls him closer and kisses him, and you feel like you've been hit by a bus.

Unable to keep up the brave face any longer, you rush to the bathroom, hoping nobody notices the tears escaping down your cheeks as you slam open the door. It's not empty - Sharon Carter's touching up her lipstick in the mirror and all but screams when you burst into the room.

"Fuck, you scared me!" She exclaims, before her face softens when she realizes you're weeping and she immediately drops her lipstick and takes your hands in hers. "What happened?"

You shake your head, the dam fully open as you sob. "Bucky," You manage to let out, hating how weak and pathetic you must look to her. "Bucky."

She pulls you in for a hug, but the comfort only makes you cry harder. "Oh, baby, it's okay," Sharon coos. "You'll be okay, I promise. I know it feels awful right now, but you will get through this. Just remember-"

Before she can continue, the door opens behind you and you curse yourself for not locking it.

"I don't think you should be here right now," Sharon says bitterly as she looks over your shoulder.

"Can you give us a minute?" It's Bucky. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"I'm staying here with her," Sharon says stubbornly, holding you tighter.

"Carter-"

"Barnes," She returns with just as much frustration in her voice as him.

You lift your head off her shoulder and nod at her. "It's okay," You whisper, wiping your cheeks.

She dabs her fingers under your eyes and nods back at you. "I'll be right outside if you need me," Sharon promises before walking past you and leaving the bathroom - but not without shoving past Bucky, first.

You stay facing the wall, resting your hip against the sink, refusing to be the first to speak. He locks the door and walks over, standing in front of you. You're staring at the ground, at his shoes.

"Your shoes are stupid," You spit.

"I like your dress," He returns.

"I look ugly in it," You say, balling your hands into fists.

"That couldn't be further from the truth," He says.

Looking up at him, you frown. "What do you want?"

Bucky swallows thickly. "I wanted to talk to you," He tells you. "Make sure you're okay."

Your eyes narrow into a glare. "You only won because of me," You claim immaturely between sniffles. "I made you famous."

He snorts and his lips pull up. "Seriously?"

"Yeah," You double down. "Best Supporting Actor. Bet it hurts that it wasn't Best Actor."

"An Oscar's an Oscar," Bucky replies casually.

"You of all people don't believe that. You didn't even deserve to win," You continue. "Tony should've won."

"Tony?" He repeats incredulously, before his face drops. "What, so he could grope you as he accepted the award? Give me another reason to beat the fuck out of him?"

"You wouldn't need to because you're not my boyfriend anymore," You hurl at him. "In fact, you never were, so why don't you fuck off back to your real girlfriend?"

"She's not my real girlfriend, and you know that," Bucky says lowly.

"Well, you're sure better at acting like it than you were with me," You retort bitterly. "Probably enjoying it more, too."

He takes a step closer to you and utters, "Stop it."

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I being too loud? Are you afraid someone will hear us?" You ask, knowing full well how annoying you're being and not caring. "Am I embarrassing you, James?"

Without warning, he moves even closer to you and cups your face in his hands. "I miss you," He says, making your stomach flip.

"What the fuck?" You whisper, trying to push him back but failing. "What's wrong with you?"

"I miss you," Bucky repeats, looking down at you with a piercing gaze.

"Well, sucks for you," You say, pulling his hands off your face. "You made your choice when you rejected me."

"I didn't reje-"

"I told you how I felt and you said you weren't ready," You cut him off. "So now that you are ready, you don't get to just waltz back in and put me back in your fucking shopping basket again. Maybe I'm not ready anymore. Ever thought about that?"

He says nothing. Instead, he kisses you. Immediately, you melt into it, but as soon as you realize what's happening, you pull back and push his chest back as hard as you can, causing his back to hit the wall. "What the fuck are you doing?" You yell. "I'm not just... you can't just kiss me in bathrooms and then go out and pretend you're in love with her. That's not how this works."

He grabs your hands and pulls you closer to his body. As hard as you try, you can't release yourself from his grip, though you aren't convinced that you're trying your hardest.

"Bucky," You say bluntly, glaring at him. "It's too little, too late."

His hands go to your waist. He turns you so you're nearest the wall and holds you against it. His chest presses to yours.

"I won't be your secret mistress for you to fuck when you're bored," You tell him sternly. "That's not me, Bucky."

Without a word, his hand goes up to your neck, his eyes burning into yours.

At the end of your tether, you exclaim, "Fucking say something!"

A few seconds pass before he finally does. "You're a dipshit," He mumbles. "And I love you."

Though it isn't the first time he's said it, hearing it in person takes your breath away. He doesn't give you any time to recover before he's kissing you again, and this time, you don't have the strength to push him away.

His kiss is hungry and wanting, his hands just as much as they pull up your dress, gathering it around your waist. As his tongue swirls against yours, he lifts you up, positioning himself between your legs. He feels familiar, safe, and like the first sip of water after a long run.

This shouldn't be happening, but you suspect that's what makes it feel this exhilarating. As his boner rubs against your inner thigh, your breaths become shallow. It's been so long, you're not sure you'll last more than a few seconds once he starts fucking you.

"Fuck, I'm not gonna last long, baby," He mumbles against your lips. "Missed my baby so bad."

"Jamie," You utter. "Put it in."

"Be patient," He says as he slips his fingers into your panties. "Gotta make sure you're ready for me."

"You're so annoying," You whine, gasping when he slips two fingers into you.

"What was that?" Bucky asks you with a smug look. "Huh? You're such a fucking brat. Can't even be patient for a few seconds, can you?"

He moves his fingers painfully slowly in and out of you, frustrating you to no end. "Don't be fucking mean," You say as you grip his shoulders tightly. "Just hurry up."

"I think you need to ask nicely," He says with his eyes on yours. "I think my dumb baby's forgotten her manners."

"Jamie-"

"No," He cuts you off curtly, stilling his fingers inside you. "Try again."

With a whimper, you release your pride. "Please, Mr. Barnes, please fuck me," You beg.

A satisfied sigh leaves his mouth as he continues to finger you, a little quicker this time. "Now, that's a good girl," He says. "Sound so fucking pretty when you beg me. What do you want, hmm?"

"Fuck me," You cry out as his fingers curl inside you. "Please, please, Mr. Barnes, please."

"Oh, baby, that's it," Bucky replies, biting his lip as he fingers you quicker. "I knew you could be good for me. Getting close?"

"Please," Is all you can say.

Just as you feel the tension building in your core, ready to snap, he pulls his fingers out of you, and you almost burst into tears.

"Don't look at me like that," He says with a chuckle. "I want the first time you cum to be around my cock. Got it?"

"You're an asshole," You mumble.

"What was that?" He asks with a raised brow.

"Nothing, Mr. Barnes," You say quickly, not wanting to have to wait any longer for your release.

"That's what I thought," He mutters before spanking your ass, sending vibrations through to your pussy. He smirks at the look on your face as your eyes roll back slightly, before spanking you again.

"Fuck," You whimper, thrusting your hips against him.

"Tell me how bad you want it," He utters, giving you another spank.

"So bad," You whisper. "I want you so bad, Jamie. Need you inside me. I missed you."

"I know, baby," He coos as he unzip his pants. "I missed you, too."

"Just this?" You find yourself asking as you lose yourself in a bout of insecurity. "Is... is this all you missed?" What are you doing? Why would you ask a question that has the potential to ruin the vibe and leave you high and dry?

Bucky rests his forehead against yours. His cock is rubbing against your clit. "I missed your laugh," He tells you. "Missed your dirty mind. Missed holding your hand. I missed watching you eat. Holding you when you were upset. Missed how hard you'd make it to not laugh at your stupid jokes. And, yeah, I missed this pussy."

With that, he pushes his cock into, making you gasp. As he bottoms out, you slowly let out your breath. As it's been over three months since you had sex, there's a bit of discomfort as he stretches you out, but that's soon forgotten when he kisses you again, stroking your tongue with his and slowly fucking in and out of you.

Groans escape his mouth as he continues thrusting, making your legs feel weak. You're glad he's holding you up. "Fuck, baby, you feel so good," Bucky moans. "Taking my cock so well."

"Don't stop," You whimper, feeling your core tighten again.

"Oh, shit," He mutters. "Baby, I won't last long if you keep squeezing me like that. Holy fuck."

"I don't care, please cum inside me," You beg, as he rubs your hard nipples over your dress.

"You first, gorgeous girl," Bucky whispers, thankfully remembering exactly what you like as he pulls your dress down and wraps his mouth around your nipple. One of his hands goes down to your pussy, his thumb rubbing your clit in circles as he fucks you faster.

"Oh, Jamie," You cry as you feel your climax approaching. Every nerve in your body is alight with pleasure as you cum, your hips seizing as your hands tug on his hair.

He continues fucking you, shoving his fingers in your mouth to stifle your loud moans. With a grunt, Bucky cums, his thrusts becoming less rhythmic with each rope.

"Fuck," He whispers as he rests his forehead against yours. "That... I swear, I've never cum that quick."

You can't help but laugh. "Shit. Me neither," You reply honestly.

He holds up his hand and you give him a high five before he slowly pulls out of you and gently puts you down onto your feet. You wobble slightly, but do well not to fall to your knees.

As you rearrange your dress, the reality of what you just did dawns on you.

"We shouldn't have done that," You mumble as you run your hands through your hair. "If anyone realizes what we did-"

"They won't," He assures you calmly.

"Sharon-"

"Wouldn't say a word even if she did," Bucky says, taking a few steps closer to you.

"So... now what?" You ask him with a frown.

He lets out a long sigh. "I have five months left of my contract with Natasha," He tells you, making your heart drop.

"Fucking five months?" You ask incredulously. "And, what, we're supposed to just sneak around while you're pretending to be with her?"

Bucky comes closer to you and places his hands on your hips. "I can't be without you, Y/N," He tells you truthfully. "I don't want to be without you. If you're willing to do this, I'll make it work. It won't be long until the contract's over. I'll make time for you - I'd do anything to see you, even just for ten minutes. I love you."

Unable to refuse him, you rest your hands against his chest, and finally tell him what you've been feeling for so long. "I love you, Jamie," You say. The words feel odd coming out your mouth - you've never said them to anyone off-camera before - but it also feels like the most natural thing in the world to be saying them to him. "We'll make it work. We'll get fucking burner phones if we have to, and I won't tell a single soul," You assure him. "I can be patient. And I can keep a secret."

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