jaspersyeehaw

[jaspersyeehaw]

Hang on a minute. Bella says in Twilight that Forks High School requires students to take Gym all four years. In New Moon, she says that she and Edward have the same class schedule. Are you telling me we missed out on scenes of Bella and Edward in gym class together??? Edward having a panic attack because he has to act human, but also constantly rescue Bella from flying volleyballs??? Imagine the DRAMA

[jaspersyeehaw]

twilight au where jacob and mike start actually fighting in the movie theater mike’s stomach bug vs jacob’s 110° fever mike vomits on jacob’s shoes and jacob’s so dizzy he runs headfirst into a wall

[jaspersyeehaw]

bella swan october november december there’s a possibility window scene is how life’s been feeling lately

[jaspersyeehaw]

actually when I was in 8th grade and obsessed with twilight my master plan as a twilight vampire was to sit around in famous shipwrecks like the super deep ones where they can only send robots with cameras from their submarines and when they sent one down i’d be sitting there, pretending to drink out of an old tea cup you know for the drama of it all and the guys in the submarine would know what they saw and that it was real footage but who else would believe them? no one important.

but it didn’t stop there. at the next party they threw to celebrate one of their latest finds, some museum-y banquet idk I was 13, I was going to show up. I was going to show up and make eye contact with them one at a time from across the room and they were going to lose their goddamn minds and then before the volturi could catch wind i was gonna be back in the ocean. how could they find me?

the drama. the theatrics. i can’t believe i didn’t realize i was gay right then but that’s another story, also involving vampires,

[jaspersyeehaw]

I wish Bella had spent more time in the supermarket as the series progressed. Big fan of the supermarket scene in the first book. Would've loved her to have a silent crisis in the soup aisle

[jaspersyeehaw]

Carlisle, explaining to the kids why they're going back to high school: now bear in mind-

Emmett: oh trust me, it is

[jaspersyeehaw]

the volturi: hi bella. here ar e the fuckign. crown jewels, congratulations on be vampire now

irina: you will NOT believe this boys

the volturi: but wE ALREADY SENT HER.... THE GIFT.........

[jaspersyeehaw]

[jaspersyeehaw]

i think we should stop calling them baby names so people remember they’re not just naming a baby but also a future twenty seven year old with a resume

[jaspersyeehaw]

[jaspersyeehaw]

The parent’s guide for the twilight movies on imdb is funny sometimes

[jaspersyeehaw]

no one:

alice and jasper walking the halls of forks high:

[jaspersyeehaw]

[jaspersyeehaw]

sorry for acting so strange & irregular it will happen again

[jaspersyeehaw]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS2AwSZlPlw/?utm_medium=copy_link

[jaspersyeehaw]

Rosalie, flirting: Oh my God your deltoids are so huge 😍

Emmett, ernestly: I've never used deltoids in my LIFE I swear 😧