je-suis-une-baguette

[je-suis-une-baguette]

one of my favourite things about Scotland is how often normal everyday folks actually blame the right people when things are shit

[je-suis-une-baguette]

They should invent a life that’s structured without being monotonous and challenging without being demanding and eventful without being stressful and peaceful without being boring

[je-suis-une-baguette]

OP: When you realize you're starting to act like your parents (cr戴阿蒙)

[je-suis-une-baguette]

[je-suis-une-baguette]

[je-suis-une-baguette]

[je-suis-une-baguette]

lets overthrow mama

[je-suis-une-baguette]

Van Helsing in movie adaptations: Dracula's nemesis

Van Helsing in the book: Dracula's real estate lawyer's wife's girlfriend's fiancé's boyfriend's university professor

[je-suis-une-baguette]

I can't remember where I first heard it, but here's a joke that's lived rent free in my head for years:

two friends, a Jew and a Christian, are talking about holiday customs.

the Jew says "on Rosh Hashanah, it's traditional to blow the shofar 30 times"

the Christian looks at him awkwardly and says "wow. all we give our chauffeur on Christmas is a bottle of wine."

[je-suis-une-baguette]

officially the best line in The Odyssey

[je-suis-une-baguette]

Today I got an invite to an event, and I had to politely decline, and as I was typing "I can't come but thank you for thinking of me!" it struck me that huh, one of my big problems with growing up neglected has been that I feel like people never remember me when I'm not around. And so this politeness on my part is also doing the secondary work of reinforcing that yeah, people do remember me when I'm not right in front of them, I exist in other people's minds. It makes me wonder what other nuggets of that kind of thing are buried in typical etiquette/politeness stuff!

[je-suis-une-baguette]

Poppies, by Ed Perkins.

[je-suis-une-baguette]

Oh yeah there's a part 2 of the horse desensitizing that I love.

🐎: Hey what's with that tiny predator, the one you're hold- WOAH WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS IT UP SO HIGH

[je-suis-une-baguette]

think 1 of the biggest lies i was sold as a kid is that bullies end up failing later in life and getting their comeuppance. girl capitalism rewards that behaviour they often thrive the meek do not inherit the earth etc etc!!

[je-suis-une-baguette]

Water is wet studies are important for both law cases and persuasion.

[je-suis-une-baguette]

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.