johnny1note

[johnny1note]

This is a rabbithole now

James I and VI: horrible clown-pants silhouette, color scheme suggests an odd blend of Santa Claus and the Pope and the white is too stark. Background doesn't go with the foreground. D.

Charles I: horrible shoes, horrible hair, boring robe, boring portrait background and the crown is barely visible because it blends right into the earth tones. No wonder they cut his head off. F.

Charles II: GREAT pose and outfit. I have never cared for 17th century poodle hair but I think it almost works here. Love how the cushion matches the red and blue in his outfit. A+.

James II: this is a very cool, different, portrait. I like the armor, the nautical motifs, and the dark color scheme, but I don't know if it's giving "coronation". B.

William and Mary: acceptable. William doesn't pull off the poodle hair as well as Charles II but I like that their colors are matching. B.

Anne: outfit and color scheme are fine in theory but pose is very stiff and the way the clothes are painted does not suggest their being dazzling; the face is well-done but the rest of the painting looks rushed and less detailed than it should be. C-.

George I: I don't think that the jabot is doing anything for the look and the shoes are far too plain. Again the face looks better than the rest of the painting, but this pose is better and the shading on the velvet is nice. C.

George II: Again the jabot doesn't do anything for the outfit but he picked better shoes. The crown and the tablecloth are not very convincing. C.

George IV: Absolutely dazzling and dramatic portrait, the paint-craft is magnificent. Things about this outfit that might be ridiculous [the hair, the ruff, the shoes, the amount of thigh visible] are pulled off because he's got the confidence but I do not like the giant red bib looking thing hanging down the center-front of the outfit like a giant tongue, so points off for that. A-.

William IV: hilariously modern outfit and hair, this looks like it could be from today. Lacks swagger of the previous ornate outfits [I think at the very least, white stockings and black breeches would lift it a bit, and/or gold braid down the pants] but the overall severe effect is not bad, though the lighting looks a little flat and washed out. B-.

Victoria: colors look vibrant and dramatic, I think the dress could have been bigger. B.

Edward VII: Outfit and pose are solid, painting is well-executed. B+

George V: likewise very solid. B+

George VI: YUCK. Hate the purple, hate the washed out color scheme, hate the pose. F.

Elizabeth II: I'm sure this was a very beautiful dress in-person but it comes off as too stark white in the portrait especially against the dark purple robes and the whole thing looks a a bit stiff. C+.

Charles III: Outfit is the same as George V's but is made boring by the pose and the lack of definition in the painting. D.

George III's coronation outfit and portrait is peak tbh.

[johnny1note]

George III's coronation outfit and portrait is peak tbh.

[johnny1note]

[johnny1note]

$20 used to mean something

[johnny1note]

Where are you from

tumblr

[johnny1note]

height check. how tall are you people in my phone

[johnny1note]

Women should start inviting other women over for tea again. Yes, tea. Yes, to your house. If you don't like tea, put lemonade in a teapot. Nothing too pretentious. A convenient excuse to stay for a 20 minute pit stop (as long as it takes to drink a cup of tea) and then be on your way. You're not hosting a party, it's just a tea. If you get to know your neighbors you could do this almost on the daily

[johnny1note]

evanescence bring me to life and britney spears toxic are sisters to me

[johnny1note]

Why do all the best live opera performances sound like they've been recorded underwater 😩

[johnny1note]

"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it

[johnny1note]

He means a little squeeze bottle with brine shrimp inside but… bottle feeding the loblings…

[johnny1note]

*cools ur dashboard down*

[johnny1note]

Delicious chocolate espresso cake

[johnny1note]

Save me buffalo blue cheese chicken burger. Buffalo blue cheese chicken burger. Save me.

[johnny1note]

[johnny1note]

I've decided I'm on a diet so I made fat-free chicken and rice with sherry gravy and its actually very good. Probably not as good as it would have been with some cream or butter but I'm pleased with it