juanaa-ii

[juanaa-ii]

OH MY GOD WE’RE TALKING ABOUT TWILIGHT! OKAY IM GONNA RANT BECAUSE I LOVE THIS STUFF! AND I LIKE THE OP!

Jacob x Bella! Yes! I know Robert Pattinson was so hot as Edward but like I cannot take his character any more seriously than that. He’s simply not good for Bella and while Bella might’ve been enamored with him (who wouldn’t be? He’s a hot cool vampire— catnip to a teenager) she was more enamored with his supernatural life.

And that’s understandable, I wanna be an immortal crystallized vampire too. Who cares if I sparkle in the sun? Tell the ladies it’s all glitter.

But Jacob? Childhood best friend Jacob? Picked her up after her break up Jacob? Ride motorcycles Jaco? And—because we’re appealing to teens— Hot Werewolf (soon-to-be) Alpha Jacob? Hell, there’s no competition. But here’s the thing, he didn’t imprint on her and that’s like a major thing to consider when debating why people like Edward x Bella.

Like yeah they have their moments but at the core of it it’s Mind reader x Mental shield which would’ve been more awesome if we kind of stuck to that dynamic but it fell flat in face of other things (human x vampire, old (not mentally) x young, strong gentleman x weak damsel) you know?

And one of the biggest (I can’t tell if it’s canon or not I’m so far gone) theories is that Jacob couldn’t imprint because of Bella’s mental shield. Also theories that it didn’t happen because the spirits were like ‘yeah that bitch ain’t your mate’. Which cool.

I don’t read Bella Bashing fics not because she’s a woman (although that’s like 50% of it) but because she’s 17.

Like if she were 32 or 27 or literally any age after her frontal lobe fully developed I would’ve been on her ass but she’s not irredeemable. Like yes she’s selfish and non-confrontational to the point of you wanting to simply slap the truth in her face but she isn’t like…a terrible monster? She can still grow and mature?

Actually, canonically throw that idea out. She’s a fucking vampire. Her as a vampire was cool, it’s also the only reason I stuck around so long. I was tired of the whole damsel in distress thing. I don’t know why we had to bring in Resume but yk. Whatever.

I hate Edward with such a passion but I hate Renée more. Renee made Bella mature faster because she was too cowardly to step into that role of a mother. Fuck her. God I hate her so much it’s so not funny. What the fuck.

All things to say, Jacob was the better choice and everyone knew it. Even Bella.

That’s so coincidental because I was legit reading (still reading) this canon divergent fic when my phone notified me of your post.

I ran through all my Jacob/Bella and now it’s time for rare-pairs again (Jasper/Bella, Alice/Bella, Jasper/Alice/Bella, Rosalie/Bella, Carlisle/Bella, Peter/Bella, Esme/Bella, Leah/Bella, Leah/Paul/Bella, Paul/Bella, Sam/Bella, Angela/Bella, etc)

Just goes to show how many people could do better than Edward because many writers manage to both characterize Bella correctly AND give her a realistic character arc.

i’m so ashamed to say the only person i ship bella with is jacob😭 i wanted to ship her with rosalie so bad but rosalie/emmet are my babies and trying to do a polyamorous relationship wasn’t doing them justice (couldn’t find a good fic for that at the time/haven’t looked again).

bella and alice are so cutesy tho!! i read jasper/bella out of boredom and i enjoy the fics even if i don’t particularly ship them

but honestly shipping any relationship in twilight feels illegal bc everyone is so fucking old??? and the only somewhat normal age for any of her (canon) romantic partners/love interests is jacob (2 yrs younger than her even if he physically presents as like? 24-25) and fucking Mike. and STILL with those limitations the twilight fandom (at least the non bella bashers) do all her relationships tastefully and with tact (as far as i’ve seen) AND give her a more dynamic voice that emphasizes her wit, sarcasm, dry humor, stubbornness, and curiosity within the books. and as far as i’ve seen DOES NOT gloss over edward’s terrible courting skills!

and, another thing, every single other pairing outside of edward i’ve seen hasn’t glossed over OTHER mistakes either. the ones with alice? they don’t gloss over the way she steamrolls over bella even if her intention is to make bella happy/show affection; jasper? doesn’t skip over the confederate soldier shit (one of the reasons i tend to shy away from his character), the way he tried to attack her, or the way he has CANONICALLY manipulated bella’s emotions even if it wasn’t maliciously. like nothing is swept under the rug. hell!! the jacob fics flat out say “jacob has a possessiveness and aggression issue. he NEEDS to fix that shit. pronto!!” and they don’t shy away from bella’s faults either! she IS selfish! she IS depressed (there’s nothing wrong w that but it’s the consensus most have reached from how dull she seemed and how okay w death she was?? cause that’s not normal) she IS beyond stubborn and curious and reckless!! hell yeah!!

all this to say: fuck edward cullen, fuck stephanie myers, and god bless ao3/ff.net writers <3!!

[juanaa-ii]

I get mad at Bella for one of her problems before realizing that literally all her problems lead back to her mom and then I’m mad at her mom and it’s a never ending cycle. Someone kill that woman and put Bella into therapy.

There has to be at least one vampire with therapeutic powers and/or multiple psychological degrees. Lord knows they love repeating schools.

[juanaa-ii]

Wait Robin and Finney being that disgusting couple who started dating in middle school and like NEVER broke up. They literally read each other’s thoughts, it freaks the others out. Whenever they fight it’s never about one or two things, no, these freaks let issues build up. From dirty laundry to a missed doctor’s appointment and a late oil change. They let their problems fester, have a big fight, and then make up just as easily.

Bruce and Vance being on and off because Vance has anger issues and/or possessive issues and Bruce has abandonment issues and a lack of patience for a controlling boyfriend. They’re so bad for each other but they work so well and they hash it out all the time that whenever they break up it’s messy and so bad it breaks their hearts even more than when they’re together.

Billy and Griffin skirt around each other. The whole ‘will they? Won’t they?’ Type. Even going as far as like friends with benefits before they eventually actually finally get together.

Now Gwen and Susie is a bit difficult because we legit don’t know who Susie is. But there’s the idea of her being this open and kind compassionate person who sees this kid flinching at loud noises and avoiding the sight of alcohol bottles and she’s like, you’re my friend now. She’s so protective over Gwen even though they’re the same age because while she doesn’t know all the details she has the idea of what’s going on at home and it breaks her heart.

Not everyone who’s Christian and gay goes through internalized homophobia BUT Gwen would have to realize that she can in fact still be Christian while being gay so…yeah.

[juanaa-ii]

People aren’t afraid of being racist or homophobic anymore. I think it’s time we start doxxing people PUBLICLY. And egg their house too. FOR SHAME.

[juanaa-ii]

Just gonna save this for later…

Fantasy Guide to Political Structures

A Horse! A Horse! My X for a Horse!

Let's be honest, fantasy authors love their kingdoms and empires. You can throw a rock in a bookshop or a library in the fantasy section and you will 99.99999% hit a fantasy book that will be set in or mention either of those structures. But what are they really? What's the difference between them all? Are there any more examples of structures that would suit your WIP better? Are you using the right terms? Let's have a closer look.

Duchy

A Duchy is a small territory ruled by a Duke/Duchess. While Duchies can be found in kingdoms, some duchies were sovereign states in their own right. Duchies are usually small by land mass but some duchies such as Burgundy were extremely powerful and influential. Independent Duchies were usually apart of a kingdom but grew so powerful that they eventually broke away to become a sovereign state in their own right. An example would be modern day Luxembourg, historic Milan and Burgundy.

Principality

A principality is territory ruled by a Prince/Princess. A principality is typically smaller than a kingdom and in some instances, can be apart of a larger kingdom or be a sovereign state. Principalities have a history of having broken away from a larger kingdom or eventually becoming apart of a kingdom. A principality within a kingdom is ruled by a Prince/Princess, usually an heir of the monarch and can be used to train them up to assume the throne in the future. Examples include Monaco, Liechtenstein and Andorra.

Kingdom

A sovereign state/country that is ruled by ruling King or a Queen. A kingdom is much larger and more powerful than a principality. Kingdoms can be feudal, meaning they are ruled in a strict hierarchy or an autocracy where the monarch rules alone with minimal input from the government or constitutional where the monarch is more of a figurehead and the government has a good chunk of control. Examples include England, Thailand and modern day Spain.

Commonwealth

A Commonwealth isn't a popular choice in fantasy but it is an interesting structure. A Commonwealth in its most basic form is a collection of states that are linked by either a shared culture or history. A Commonwealth can be a politically power or an economic power, with every state allowed to participate as much as they like. Not one state leads the others, it is all one group of equals. A Commonwealth can be a good idea for a group of nations that are more powerful together with them keeping their own independence.

Federation

A Federation is a political structure that is made up of united states or countries that are under a single government but each state is still independent and rules itself. Each state can have different laws, different cultures and economies but they all answer to the single government. Examples include the United States of America.

Republic

A Republic is a territory that is ruled by leaders and heads of state that have been elected on merit and by choice of the people. Republics are not just countries but can also be much smaller areas such as cities. Republics are democratic in nature, with the people having a say in who leads them in accordance to a constitution. There are many kinds of Republic: presidential, parliamentary, federal, theocratic, unitary. Examples of Republics include the Republic of Ireland and the city of Florence.

Protectorate

A Protectorate is a country/region/territory that is independent but relies on a larger, more powerful state for protection either in a military or diplomatic sense. A Protectorate was often used by Empires in order to maintain control over an area without annexing it. There are many reasons a larger state and the protectorate would agree to this, mainly the protectorate is much smaller meaning it is far more vulnerable to attack or it has very little power when compared to other states. A Protectorate allows the territory some power to rule itself but the larger state may feel the need or desire to interfere in the dealings of the territory. Examples of protectorates include the client kingdoms of the Roman Empire like Egypt before its annexation and Puerto Rico.

Empire

An Empire is a collection of nations that are united under one sovereign head of state or government. An Empire is formed by one nation steadily taking control of other nations, either through straight invasion and colonization or acquiring them through marriage and other less violent ways. An Empire is powerful mainly because it can drum up more resources, more influence and more military power. An Empire might impose the traditions, beliefs and culture of its principal nation - the nation that started it all - onto its colonies for better control and feeling of uniformity. Empires never last, that is something to always remember. Empires will eventually fragment due to the vast size and sometimes revolt among the conquered states. Examples of empires include the Roman Empire, the Byzantine Empire, the Ottoman Empire.

[juanaa-ii]

Be a Burr apologist/fan all you want, that man doesn’t deserve to be a president and there’s (surprisingly) nothing petty about Hamilton not choosing him.

[juanaa-ii]

Apparently…unpopular opinion? But I do like botl! Percy.

It was him having the prophecy over his head, about to die and here’s two people (Rachel and Calypso) who represented him escaping his duties, to have a lifetime to sit and breath, not worry about anything else. Annabeth meant facing the prophecy, meant living the dangerous Demi-god life.

And while he chose Annabeth in the end, Calypso’s domestic life will always be in the back of his head every time he fights monsters or loses another friend to their fated death. Rachel would’ve also been his biggest ‘what if?’ If she wasn’t destined to be the oracle.

I’ll clean and edit this post later but I just wanted to get it out there.

[juanaa-ii]

One thing that I love about the Odysseus vs Alexander debate is that Odysseus golden ticket is the fact that Alexander PUBLICLY cheated on his wife. Like I get a crazy amount of satisfaction from seeing this man tear into Alexander about it.

One thing, though. A small minuscule detail. Thing is, Alexander was not a bad father. A bad husband? YES! But not a bad father. In the musical, there’s a whole song about him and Burr’s newborns and how bright they are. If that isn’t enough to satisfy you, there’s actual historical evidence of Alexander playing the piano and singing with his children.

So while Alexander commuted adultery, he never committed abuse or neglect. Yay.

[juanaa-ii]

WLW Jamilton?? Bitch I needed thisss

save me wlw jamilton saveee meeee

[juanaa-ii]

There��s this really funny scenario in my head (let me know if anyone has done something like this) of Jack Frost like if he had a home (a cave, a castle, ETC) he’d make his dishes and utensils out of frost and ice because he forgets that not everyone can just not feel cold like him.

And when he shows off his home to the other guardians. Maybe with a small tea party (he’s from the 1700s or smth) and the others are straight up struggling to hold the ice cups because of how cold they are but they can’t tell Jack because he’s so proud to have a home and he’s showing it off so proudly they can’t bare to break his heart.

Jack, smiling widely: How are you liking your tea?

Bunnymund (teeth clacking): i-its n-n-nice!

Toothiana (mouth trembling) : So good!

Nicholas (used to the cold): Great!

Sandman: 😅👍☕️

[juanaa-ii]

Okay so from what I understand from a fic I just read, the Guardians have a sort of hierarchy? Like the more believers you have, the more powerful you are and since the Guardians have thousands of children believing them, they’re very powerful. And what the children view you as it shapes your powers? Like if children start seeing Jack Frost as a symbol of Winter (which he probably already is) then his powers would extend past the frost, snow, and ice he already has. If they view him scary, he changes his shape. Am I on the right track?

[juanaa-ii]

I’ve fallen back down the Jamilton hole. Don’t try to save me, it’s too late.

Kiss or punch?

[juanaa-ii]

I have lots of questions that I’m sure old time tumbler users and long time rotg fans can answer.

Isn’t Jack Frost technically Scandinavian??

Also, how does the mythology there work? Is it more like ‘children know this story so the magic does this’ or ‘the magic does this so children know that??’

Like Santa Claus is real but if children start talking about reindeer do they appear? Or is it more like Santa just wrangled up some random deer, made one of them red-nosed, and carried on his Russian jolly way.

And if so, how would that work for Jack Frost? I can see him being a cautionary tale. Like the bogeyman, you know? It’d crush his soul but that’s how it’d be. Winter spirits aren’t usually nice (I.e. snow queen, Khionis, etc) but he is. If it were a folklore thing, I can see the poem books already. It’s almost cruel that Jack (Guardian of Fun) is a herald of the most brutal season of all.

I kind of wanted the Rise of The Guardians sequel purely to see more of Jack Frost’s domain. Like what he’d create and what he’d do, you know? Nicholas made a workshop in the mountains where the elves and yetis helped with toys. Sandman is a one person army on a sand cloud. Toothiana has a queendom of mini fairies. E. Aster Bunny has a Warren and those stone egg-shaped things.

Nicholas took the mountains so I could see Jack being in a cave. He’s nomadic, that I know, but what is he gonna do on the off season. When the north hemisphere is dealing with autumn and the south is dealing with spring or something along those lines.

Please answer soon.

[juanaa-ii]

I’m so sorry rotg fandom im like fourteen years late to the party 😔

I re-watched the movie, I have the books on hold, and I am a new member of the rotg fandom! Yay!

Unfortunately, it’s dead…

[juanaa-ii]

I finished suits (obv) but before I knew that Rachel and Mike were leaving because of Meghan Markle’s wedding I thought the show would end in a full circle, you know?

Harvey and Louis are managing partners and Harvey promotes Mike as Senior Partner and tell him “hey, now it’s you who has to find an associate.”

Mike panics and says, “How am I suppose to work with someone else? I work better alone.”

And Harvey says, “I said the same thing, look where we are now.’”

Donna agrees to come in and help Mike, for both amusement and nostalgic reasons.

Harvey make some stupid joke like ‘Make sure not to hire another fraud.’ And Mike’s just like, “that’s so not funny, dude.”

(“Don’t call me dude.”)

Anyways, Donna sits there, interviews the associates, and the one that Mike hires isn’t a fraud but maybe they’re worst. Like they were allegedly charged for murder or something??

Harvey doesn’t even look confused when the kid comes in with Mike. He’s just like “I should’ve known you’d do this.”

[juanaa-ii]

In another universe, Mike would’ve been a kick-ass secretary. Not Harvey’s secretary but like some CEO’s secretary because I’m sure you don’t need a college degree for that (or maybe you do?)

It’d be a cool story. Harvey decides, ultimately, he can’t risk hiring Mike and lets him go after the cops are gone. Even gives him his business card and tells Mike that if he ever needs any help, he’d take his case pro-bono.

Mike is sullen but goes back to bike riding deliveries. The CEO just had his secretary walk out on him and he’s down on his luck, looking for someone competent. In comes this smart know-it-all kid who not only memorized the layout of his firm enough to deliver his package promptly, but also knows just from a glance at the documents that the CEO shouldn’t take a deal he was just about to sign.

And Mike goes on this whole tangent about how terrible the deal is and this CEO is baffled and thinks ‘I want this guy’ and then Mike spills his whole life story again (Because obviously) and the CEO is like ‘you’re hired, you don’t need a college degree for this job’.

And it’s a rough week, adjusting to his new boss and his coworkers but while he isn’t rising so much in social situations, he’s certainly even brighter then CEO hoped for.

And, biggest kicker? The CEO is recently signed off as a client of Pearson Hardman. Or, particularly, as Harvey Spector’s client.

The whole point of this tangent wasn’t about Harvey or Jessica or Louis. It was actually about Donna. I think the two of them would’ve been great friends if Mike was a secretary. Mike would’ve been like Donna. He’s terrifying but unlike Donna, he’s completely oblivious to it. Donna reads people but Mike memorizes images and conversations. His visual and auditory skills scares the others. When he asks for something, you do it because you don’t know if he has dirt on you and you don’t know if he’s seen what you did in the bathroom or if he’s heard the conversation you had in the break room.

Mike just thinks the others are very kind workers.

Now that I think about it…what if Mike was Louis’s secretary?? Oh lord.

[juanaa-ii]

I don’t know if there are any fics on this but it would’ve been so funny if the plot point wasn’t that Mike isn’t a lawyer but that he isn’t from Harvard.

Nothing major changes except for like the prison arc (and a few other misunderstandings). I’m pretty sure the timeline checks out—if a little wonky. Mike is brilliant enough that I’m sure he got a lot of scholarship offers.

He picks Harvard like he originally did and gets banned because he sold tests to the Dean’s daughter (like he originally did) the only difference is that he went to a different school (still Ivy league because of Mike’s big brain) like Yale or Cornell. In fact, I bet he did go to Yale and he absolutely hates Harvard douchebags (even though Yale has douchebags—NOT THE POINT)

Anyways. The secret wouldn’t be big. In fact it’d be comical. Mike still works to put in the effort to fit in with the rest of the Harvard associates, he still goes about his cases as he usually does, he’s just not from Harvard. Jessica doesn’t react with the whole ‘this is gonna get me fired’ it’s more of ‘why the hell did you hire outside of our motto?’ And Rachel isn’t all ‘you should quit’ it’s more of ‘I can’t believe you kept this from me’ but also, later on, very relieved (when she’s accepted into Columbia).

The best part is that some would think he’s a fraud. Like Louis. I think the writers could have used Louis ‘figuring out Mike is a fraud’ plot as like a comical thing that lasts episodes (like it did in the show) only for him to find out that Mike is just from Yale and it would be a anticlimactic reveal but Louis takes it personally and he’s all ‘I cant believe you damaged our integrity’ or whatever.

But yeah. Mike’s legit. He’s just not for Harvard. So no, he still doesn’t know where Harvard students get their pizza but at least he knows where Yale students get drunk. And that whole plot of that girl he dated who broke up with him after he lied about being a lawyer? I think if I tweaked it, he’d be like ‘I’m a big shot lawyer’ and she finds out he’s still a student or something.

He’d have a part time job at the legal clinic he worked at with Oliver and Nate. And that’d be why the girl breaks up with him, because he lied about how much of a big shot he was but at least he wasn’t a fraud. Actually working at a legal clinic works perfectly because it’d be the job he takes instead of a bike messenger.

Even better, there would be scenes of Mike accidentally running into his old Yale classmates in front of or near the Harvard associates or someone like Rachel, Jessica, Louis, and Mike is just absolutely panicking about it.