kevinninjasloth

[kevinninjasloth]

Oh.. un hi Uncle Ed?

Riddler was checking his watch, waiting for his henchmen to come bringing two Wayne they said they found on time in the Distraction at the Museum.

20 minutes before show time.

He walked towards the first tied up wayne as keeping two apart in separate rooms was a brilliant idea. Only this wayne was oddly wearing casual clothes that seemed more mid western state that made his eyes narrow in silent calculations. Grabbing the brown bag covering the Wayne head and pulling it off.

A very familiar yet annoying face with a splatter of face paint of planets and stars. Blue eyes who recognized him not in fear but a quiet joy that made Riddler's face go flat with tired sighed.

"Danny, what are you doing in Gotham, and please don't tell me your parents are in gotham?" Riddler asked, pinching his fingers between his nose.

"Oh..umm.. hi Uncle Ed? Ah no. My parents are spending a trip in the Bahamas cruise with vlad? I'm just.. Freelancing while Jazz in Collage over here?" Danny said with a nervous smile his eyes flick a bit to the right as he trying to keep a strong gaze at his uncle who face palmed his hand.

"You snuck over here when you're supposed to be with Alicia for the summer. Did we not have a whole PowerPoint discussion with your parents about you staying away from Gotham City even if im no longer on probation to not teach you?" Riddler groaned as he untied his nephew, mumbling about getting his stuff back from his henchmen later.

"You know, Aunt Alicia doesn't like me much, and Jazz talked about this crazy clown trying and failing to off her due to Fright Knight, and I'm not getting out of this even if I pay you?" Danny, stop trying the excuses at point blank as he follows his uncle slowly our his secret hideout.

"Maybe, but your parents are still going to find out, then I'll be to blame for not telling them about you staying over here with me, and you know how your mom get about me."

"Is she still salty about that incident with bumbl-

"Yes, she still is ab- watch out for block step 3 by 9-, and I swear she has a bazooka carved with my name on it for the day I visit your house." Riddler sighed, disabling the traps he had set out earlier as easily as breathing while Danny avoided the white and black checker floor block before he stepped on it weight sensor pressure.

"..."

"I'm still sorry, and thank you for taking the blame that day, Uncle Ed." Danny whispers softly.

[kevinninjasloth]

Skittles-Flavored Fear

AKA "The Batfam rescue several Gotham-U students from Scarecrow's latest hostage situation. However, Dr. Jonathan Crane becomes obsessed when one student has a strange reaction to the Fear Toxin - extreme exhilaration and giddiness." Based on this prompt!!

Danny knows Ghosts feed on intense emotion to survive; he's never had to, never wanted to because it feels... parasitic. He never thought he'd be drugged with it. Sitting among his fellow students, tied up as the Straw Man or whatever monologues about his evil plans, Danny thought the worst thing that could happen would be hallucinating a dissection table. Maybe the GIW or his parents with gleaming googles and scalpels at the ready.

He doesn't even realize they're already being gassed until Danny takes a breath and tastes... skittles? Like, taffy, frosted cream, and melty-sweet syrup. The more he breathes it in, the more he feels strangely floaty. His head feels both heavy and light, stuffed with cotton, and he can barely even hear. (If he could hear, he'd probably would be horrified by his classmates screaming, writhing in terror all around him like a swarm of buzzing locusts.)

And then somebody - The Straw Man - is looming in front of him, grabbing Danny by the face, and curiously tilting his head. After a moment of contemplation, Straw Man rummages around in his satchel before Danny gets freaking hosed in the face with a concentrated dose of Fear Toxin. And then everything gets better worse. Danny feels euphoric. He's giggling, smiling, head so clouded from the high that he doesn't even notice even Dr. Crane drags him through the crowded lecture hall. Doesn't notice when two goons grab him by the arms and start to haul him toward the exit.

What he does notice is the Straw Man's body slamming into the wall. Several figures blur in shades of black, blue, green, and red as Danny squints to try and focus on at least one of them. Then, somebody - blue and black - is at his side. Danny kind of... slides down the hero's side, legs too wobbly to hold himself up, until the hero has to prop Danny into a half-laying-half-sitting position. Danny's still giggling, slurring something and his hand somehow finds the hero's face, patting it in thanks for the rescue.

It's only when the Big Bat comes over, fits an odd-shaped mask over Danny's face, that he stops smelling candy. Instead, he smells something putrid, almost like formaldehyde, sweat, and... unmentionable body fluids. Danny's head is throbbing like brain freeze and a pressure headache, nausea so intense he can taste it in the back of his throat and cramps in his stomach. One moment he's mumbling 'm gon' throw up and the next he's ripping the mask off his face. Turns to the side and... barfs on Batman. (If he were more coherent, he'd probably be mortified. Maybe even die again of embarrassment. Worse when Nightwing cackles uncontrollably from beside him. Ancients, he'd petted Nightwing!! On the freakin' face!!)

That's the last thing that Danny remembers. He wakes up in the hospital several hours later, several texts from Jazz, Sam, and Tucker saying they're taking the next flight to Gotham. Danny flops back into the hospital bed and groans. Groans louder when he remembers what happened in the lecture hall. At least there's probably a very small amount of people who can say they barfed on the Dark Knight of Gotham and got away with it, right?

(Cue Scarecrow constantly trying to kidnap Danny and the Batfam being put on Danny-watch to make sure he's safe. Maybe also trying to figure out why Danny reacts differently to Fear Toxin, but assume he's an undocumented meta with a unique biology. Danny absolutely thinks he's being stalked by Batman as revenge.)

[kevinninjasloth]

When you can do multiple impressions and end up doing a self made skit, by yourself of a Toad from Mario robbing Shaggy and Scooby Doo. The Toad trying to steal Scooby for money and Shaggy having to unlock 1% of his power, utterly melting Toad away.

My wife watched by the way.

[kevinninjasloth]

Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.

[kevinninjasloth]

I’m paying to force seven thousand strangers to see a photo of my late husband having fun with his dog. Tumblr Blaze is totally worth it. XD

[kevinninjasloth]

hi. did you know australia has a fairywren species called the superb fairywren

and another species called the splendid fairywren

...and one called the lovely fairywren

[kevinninjasloth]

Do I get bitches? Idk, do I own a cat shaped charcuterie board with mouse cheese knife?

[kevinninjasloth]

The greatest banter

[kevinninjasloth]

[kevinninjasloth]

the whump fan’s dilemma

[kevinninjasloth]

[kevinninjasloth]

i love the -with mama trend but sometimes i get sad because that is clearly papa and he aint getting any credit raising those darn kids...

[kevinninjasloth]

wish I had enough radiation to set off a geiger counter but come with no health repercussions

[kevinninjasloth]

shut up

[kevinninjasloth]

you cant fucking hurt me bitch im protected by the migratory bird act

[kevinninjasloth]

sometimes when my mom gets drunk she goes into Liberated Women Mode, and one time she was real tipsy and while talking about her friend’s divorce, she very earnestly told me and my sister (both adults) that regardless of preference or relationship, she hoped we would both reach a point in our lives where we were having really good sex with really good people. and my sister said, “i do that now except the good people part” and i said, “sex is real?” and my mom didn’t love either of those answers

[kevinninjasloth]

i hate dogs with blue eyes. why is fucking jeff the killer at my back door