l-watches-while-note-taking

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I just spent twenty minutes watching 4 minutes worth of movie cause I was note taking, some of it was transcribing but oof

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First thing I did this year was watch Witcher Blood Origin, I loved it, best start to the year I've had in a while! Elie and Fjall, her voice used to start a rebellion and also be an anchor, Fjall going through the first mutation and asking softly once everything was done to die, my emotions were messed with. And like everyone was a badass and I was vibrating. New year actually started during the mutation process, which interesting, don't know if that's supposed to say something about this year.

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I finally watched The Batman (2022) and oooh I like it a lot. Also that Batman is not neurotypical, and I love that for him. I have more thoughts but it's 3 am and I don't have words since it's my first watch of it, analyzing will have to wait till next watch. But oooh the way they made Gotham feel like not just a city but Gotham was amazing. I like how it's an origin of him becoming a signal of hope rather than just oh here's Batman's debut he strikes fear into Gotham. He's a symbol of hope for those in need in Gotham and fear for those who would harm others. Jim Gordon was 10/10 loved seeing him and Batman work together, him being like I trust you but you should also trust me with who tf you are, you'll learn that plausible deniability will be your friend in time. It's also a good lead in for Gordon to become commissioner and shows him as a natural leader at the end.

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Roxanne said she didn't want to lose Cyrano a second time and then he dies in her arms, she lost both of the men she loved because of the same war. Christian in the battlefield and Cyrano having his old injury act up and kill him. She never truly got a chance to be happy with either of them. No time to love either of them as she would have wanted to, and neither man got to love as himself properly before they died. I'm just gonna find somewhere to cry (not really cause it's 1:15 and I need to sleep cause I got stuff to do tomorrow)

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No wait I'm not done I'm like 60% that there was more to his last sentence because I am very mad and I want some happiness on this hellscape

"And I loved my pride....." too much to swallow it and say I loved you sooner, scared that you would not love me for more than my words. That's how it was supposed to go right right, cause no fuck that as someone's last words to the person they've loved all their life after they finally learned that that person loves them back.

Hi wtf was that ending, I know it was you and I love you, I've always loved you don't die and I'm sorry I loved my pride and he just fucking dies, no I cannot accept I need happy ending aus stat. No wtf I refuse no.

I also I am going to listen to the soundtrack and cry, what of it

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Hi wtf was that ending, I know it was you and I love you, I've always loved you don't die and I'm sorry I loved my pride and he just fucking dies, no I cannot accept I need happy ending aus stat. No wtf I refuse no.

I also I am going to listen to the soundtrack and cry, what of it

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"One of us, none us" hey how about both of you

Also both are so sure that she could never love him after she learns the truth, Cyrano because he doesn't believe she could love him at all and Christian because it was Cyrano's words that that made her fall in love. Like I wish that this could end happily with Roxanne in a relationship with both Cyrano and Christian, but I know that's not gonna happen and I'm just gonna sit here and start crying

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The song So Take This Letter or whatever it's actually called nearly made me flipping cry like my emotions

Christian wants Cyrano to tell Roxanne the truth, that he wrote the letters and that he loves her. He says that Roxanne said she loved him for his soul but that Cyrano was his soul, how she said she would love him even if he became disfigured. That they both live her and how she deserves to know the truth and I'm gonna cry there's still 30 minutes I'm scared

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Christian realizing that Cyrano is also in love with Roxanne and feeling like it's wrong to kiss her when Cyrano is the one who wooed her, knowing now that they both love her but he can't resist when Cyrano tells him to go to Roxanne that he's the one she wants, I am completely normal not feeling like crying at all

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Soft my romantic heart swooning to oh god no what have you done awkward

Like oof no I was so soft .5 seconds ago go tf back, this is why words are left to Cyrano Christian, romance is so delicate at the start

Also the song fills me with yearning, like oh god that is what love is in the beginning wanting someone and feeling like you can never have them because you don't feel worthy (it can also be something that was always there from the start, something that you slip into without realizing. Love is so many things in so many ways, and is infinitely different)(also is based on like the one crush I had, I have never been in a relationship, I am far from an expert on what it one is)

Also go back go back, give me the soft yearning not fumbling awkward far too bold

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Christian and Cyrano fumbling to get Roxanne to listen while Cyrano comes up with the words for Christian to speakis funny and adorable. Also 100% understand Roxanne being like where the fuck is the poet who is was conversing with me through written word and that she doesn't want to hear him say he loves her, she's heard that line before (presumably it went badly).

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Roxanne being sneaky and tricking the Duke into leaving Cyrano and Christian behind is A++, but then he's cornering her and oof someone help

Like dude from my knowledge you suck, Roxanne has absolutely no actual interest in you and just wants you gone but you have power so she has to pretend that you don't disgust her, you hate Cyrano basically because he exists, and highly likely you'll threaten/send someone to attack Christian once you hear about how Roxanne is in love with him and how he's in n love with her.

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I am very much wishing that this ends and a throuple but I know it won't, their voices all mixing together was absolutely beautiful and I am in awe.

Also

Roxanne: Yeah you and Christian are similar but different, different ways of saying things

Cyrano: *has literally been writing the letters she's gotten*

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I help describe the person you're in love with, describes the person they are in front of and then it's actually someone else, I hate and love this trope so much, like you could be in love with this person who is established as good person and friend of yours and I already heard that this ends sad and I am scared and sad already

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"I'm not impressed by your swordsmanship"

"Oh I know or rather I know to pretend you're not"

"I'd be very angry with you if you died"

"Only angry"

"Incandescent"

All while she's cleaning and bandaging his wound, I am so so soft

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Cyrano being so caught up in figuring out what to say that he misses Roxanne's entrance is very relatable, especially with how soft the music is. The beat is one of those that you can feel yourself finding comfort in if you let yourself. The lyrics are all beautiful so far.

The intimacy of your wounded, it's a scratch, I know how bad you are at bandaging, it's a scratch and Roxanne redoing the dressing anyway. I am soft

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I was going to cheat my way into watching the Batman but the quality wasn't very good but I also found Cyrano in good quality so I'm about to watch it on a device at home

HELL YEAH