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283,000 likes………giant meteor strike the earth rn holy shit. oh my god.

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his tuoy

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stop eating gruel with the fools and come eat a leek with a freak

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1$ flea market score. Tiny glass 1960s perfume bottles. I love them.

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i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

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As it is Passover again, it is time for the annual debate as to whether the frog plague, which thanks to a quirk in the Hebrew, is written as a plague of frog, singular, rather than the plural, plague of frogs, was in fact, as generally imagined, a plague of many frogs, or instead a singular giant Kaiju frog. This is an ancient and venerable argument that actually goes back to the Talmud because this is what the Jewish people are. If we can't argue for fun about this sort of thing, what are we even doing.

In that spirit, I would like to submit a third possibility, which is that in fact it was one perfectly normal sized frog, who was absolutely acing Untitled Frog Game: Ancient Egypt Edition. One particularly obnoxious frog, who through sheer hard work, managed to plague all of Egypt.

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“Oh you haven’t met yet, this is my daughter Rachel”

(via)

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not my island, not my yoshis

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maybe im just a weirdo but does anyone else hear an interesting or relevant conversation behind you in a way where you think if i’d been a cat my ear would have done this just now

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GIRL WHAT?!

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Whiteknuckling my plastic break room chair trying to figure out how to ask my boss for a raise like 70% of what you’re paying me right now is just keeping me housed and if you want five more years of gold star employee behaviour then you’re gonna have to lighten the fucking load or I’m just gonna start letting people piss in the food court

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do you guys remember when we used to say oh worm all the time. remember that