lesugar

[lesugar]

[lesugar]

Received in Lincolnshire, England on April 5, 2020 to the room of Sugar Motta, courtesy of Aiden Dunn:

Normally whenever I look for a birthday present for you, I always look for something slightly flashy, something that’s immediately eye catching, and even better if it’s something you have to look at a couple of times to fully appreciate it, because that’s how I always think of you. This time it was so much easier, and I didn’t really have to look too much farther than a few stores in Time’s Square. I saw these, and I, of course, immediately thought of you and your upcomming adventure.

The charm bracelet is, well, rather obviously what it’s for. But since I’m sure you’ll find a few things along the way that you might want to ad, I made there that there were spaces for you to add your own charms, should you want to. The jeweler assured me that  it should be simple to add some on, and if not, then I’m sure you could find someone to help.

The book, I’ll admit, I only glanced though, but what really struck me was the quote. You’ve certainly be on some interesting adventures since the time I’ve known you [did you think of Mexico too?], and you’re about to go on an even bigger one. Out of everyone I know [and well, Santana, but I’m sure you know how I mean], you’re one of the few I know who’s getting a chance to follow their passion all the way around the world. I hope you find some amazing adventures while you’re off charming the entire world [you’ve already charmed the US, so I’m sure it won’t be too hard], and I look forward to reading all about them. (:

I was going to wish you an incredibly time, but I’m sure we both know that you’ll have one. So, with that, I’ll simply say I’ll see you soon.

Happy birthday!

Love, 

Rachel, Az, and Avi.

[lesugar]

Received in Lincolnshire, England on April 5, 2020 to the room of Sugar Motta, courtesy of Aiden Dunn:

Sugar,

I’m sorry this is a few days late, you already know why. It’s no excuse though, because a friend like you should never slip my mind. You’re an amazing human being, and it’s been a privilege to be your friend and learn and grow with you over the years. You’re an incredible person, and I know I wouldn’t be the person I am today without you. 

For the girl who has everything, I’m giving you a gift that’s just a bit self serving. Take a photo – take a million – in every place you go. I want to see them all one day when we meet up again. And I want to hear all about your crazy adventures. This is for the girl who stormed into Dalton in her Warblerette uniform and owned it. For the soul who found herself when she thought she was lost. For the woman who became an amazing mother. For the lady who’s going to take the world by storm.

Happy Birthday, Sugar!

You’ll always be Little Miss Badass to me.

Love, Jeff Sterling

[lesugar]

TTFN (Ta Ta, For Now) || Self Para

TAGGING: Sugar Motta, Blake Mercy, Madeline Motta, Al Motta, Rose England-Motta, and Rory Flanagan.

WHEN: April 1, 2020 / Unknown date

WHERE: Chicago, Illinois / Dublin, Ireland

NOTES: This isn't a goodbye to all the amazing, outstanding love that is Make-A-Change roleplay. I'll never say goodbye. It is, however, an indefinite see you later. You've been good to me and I have no regrets. Love to all!

Sugar couldn't remember the last time she'd seen her condo so empty. Not even when she first moved in had it been completed bare and yet, standing in the living room and taking a last spin around, seeing it stripped down made it feel all the more realistic that her time there was done. Aiden had come by in the morning to make sure she had everything she needed, though he would meet her in the airport the following day. Sugar knew it was his odd, backward way of showing endearment. Nevertheless, after he'd left, it wasn't an hour later that not only Al and Rose showed up from the long haul from Cincinatti with a U-Haul but Blake made his appearance in packing up the finality of her things. Al and Rose were taking most of the large furniture, like their beds and kitchen appliances, back to Cincinatti with them to keep it all in storage for the time being. Who knew when the time would come for Sugar to need ones but, in any case, for now that was what she would do with them. It didn't take as long as she'd expected, however, for the movers to pack up the U-Haul. The rest half of the day was spent, thankfully, Rose, Blake, and Sugar strolling against the cooler weather of Millenium Park while Al carried Maddie lovingly on his back. Al was getting older, not as quick moving as he was when Maddie was younger, but in any case was still more than eager to swing her around hard enough to make her laugh. At one point, Rose had even run off to scoop up her giggly grandchild for a few last moments until who knew how long until they all saw each other again.

Before taking off, Al had scooped Sugar into a tight embrace. Closing her eyes, taking in her father's scent, she nodded into her shoulder as he spoke.

"I'm so proud of you, Sugardarling. You know that?"

A quiver exited her throat, but thankfully it was covered up from her mouth muffling his shoulder.

"Never forget it. You'll always be my Sugarnova."

This goodbye felt permanent, though Sugar knew it shouldn't have. However, like she'd explained, she wasn't sure when their return would be thus making their move away from Chicago all the more final. Rose wrapped her arms tightly around Sugar's waist, in which Sugar returned the hug properly. She couldn't help but think back on when she disliked Rose. The first time she'd met her, over a startling dinner that was supposed to be one shared with her father, and she'd assumed she was more than the worst. Now, she couldn't imagine hers, or her family's, like without her. She made Al happy and, with that, Sugar owed her the world.

Over dinner that evening, after Al and Rose had officially headed back to Cincinatti before nightfall, Blake had invited Sugar and Maddie over for their last, and final, Spaghetti Night. Maddie was scarfing down the meal, as she always did, but Sugar found herself swirling the noodles round and round her plate as she sat opposed to Blake who seemed to have been doing the same. His solomn face looked as if he was trying his hardest to be intrigued in what Maddie was babbling on about, mostly about the wonders of how to live in a different country, but Sugar could see right through him. He was sad, as was she, and he was trying not to show it. However, as it had always been, Blake wore his emotions on the outside and Sugar could read him like an open book. Just as she had been able to the whole first few months of knowing him, when he'd been completely infatuated with her from a far, Sugar knew what his feelings were doing. And now, they were doing a complete number on him. 

The limousine was waiting out front, eager to make its way to the airport as it honked its horn. Maddie hopped down the final step of their condo's staircase, pulling her small carry-on case behind her as Sugar followed behind. As the exited the building, just as the driver was getting out of the car to help them load what bags they had, a purr of a motorcycle was heard amongst the car horns from the street traffic. Blake, pulling up next to the limo, pulled off his helmet quickly.

"Blake!"

"Sugs, how about one last ride?"

Her eyebrows crooking as she placed her hand to her forehead, shielding her eyes from the city, Sugar opened her mouth the respond. How was she to say no? Looking to their driver to Maddie, who was hopping up and down eagerly, Sugar looked back to the persistent looking Blake and nodded.

"You better not kill me, Mercy."

"Scouts honor, Motta."

Before she knew it, they were pulling out into the streets of Chicago for one last scenic route before saying goodbye to it for good. Her eyes watching the familiar sights go by, Sugar held out her arms from his waist and closed her eyes. The limosine's honking had Sugar turning over her shoulder, instantly laughing and tapping Blake on his shoulder to catch a quick look at the sight behind them. Maddie was, as Sugar was, outstretching her arms out the sunroof of the limo. The small girl looked beyond ecstatic and, with that, Sugar turned around and did just what she was doing. Letting out a large squeal, Blake imitating her with a few hoots of her own, Sugar finally wrapped her arms back around him and rested her head against his back as they grew closer to the airport. That moment felt like it could last forever but she knew that wasn't even close to being the case. Soon, it would be all over. Soon, it would be nothing but a memory.

"Momma and I wrote you things."

Blake's eyebrows rose as Maddie reached into Sugar's purse, practically pulling Sugar down as she did so. Sugar watched as Maddie pulled out the two envelopes and handed them over to Blake. Taking the papers in his hands, he nodded towards Madeline as he knelt down to be at her height.

"You can't read it now. Just read it later when you're alone! It's special. Like you."

Blake bit down on his lip as he held the papers close to his heart for a moment before slipping them into his back pocket. Before he let anymore time disappear from them, his arms were around Maddie and he was lifting her into the air. Letting out a frustrated groan, Blake closed his eyes tightly and walked around in a full circle as he held onto the small girl.

"You know I love you, right Mad?"

His voice was quivering as he spoke, but Sugar watched as Maddie's mouth curled up with sadness.

"Yeah.."

"You know you're my girl."

"Yeah.."

Sugar crossed her arms to keep her emotion under control as Blake knelt back down to the ground, letting her go enough to kiss at her cheeks. Normally, Maddie would've been quick to push his face away. However, as if she knew the seriousness of the situation, she didn't stop him. As he stood up, holding onto Maddie's hands as he did so, his eyes were on Sugar's. As soon as his eyes hit hers, Sugar felt his chin shake and his arms were around her before she began to cry.

"Oh, Blake.."

"I'll love you forever, Sugar Motta."

"You're my person, Blake."

"And you're mine. You'll always be. Just be happy, okay? God, that's all I want for you. It's all I want."

Sugar nodded as she pulled herself out of the hug enough to clasp her hands over his cheek, kissing him with as much pure love she could muster. She barely noticed him slipping the small piece of paper into her back pocket. Pulling away to look at his eyes, seeming as he was doing the same, Blake motioned his head toward the hand of Maddie's that he was still holding.

"You take care of my girl, alright?"

Clearing her throat before she spoke, Sugar took in a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Always."

Dublin, Ireland was a lot different than Sugar had remembered it to be. The streets were filled with people walking gleefully on the cobblestone paths. Her eyes gazing through the darkness of her sunglasses, Sugar had been walking side-by-side with Aiden as he attempted to keep Sugar looking as inconspicuous as possible. Sugar's thoughts, however, weren't even close to being worried about being sought about by a few fans wanting her autograph. Instead, her eyes humbly settled on Madeline, who was skipping just a few steps ahead of her, her cheeks beaming from the beautiful day beating down on them. Holding loosely onto Piddle's pink leash as they walked the streets, Maddie seemed more concerned in not stepping on the cracks on the sidewalks. Reaching over, Sugar pecked a light kiss onto Aiden's cheek just as he began rambling on about what they had to prepare for, show wise, for the evening.

"Take it in, Ay. We're in 'Dooblin Seety, Ireloond.' Not a lot of people could say this right now, now can they?"

Aiden, breaking his serious exterior briefly, chuckled just as Sugar motioned to the city around them.

"You have a terrible Irish accent. Seriously, don't do that on the show tonight."

A cackle left Sugar's lips as she adjusted her purse onto her shoulder, just as Aiden guarded a few close-by walkers from getting too close.

"So I've heard."

It was as if the moment had happened in the quickest of flashes. Piddle, the older dog that she was now, rarely barked. The bark startled not only Sugar, but Madeline enough for her to let go of the leash she'd been holding onto. Piddle was gone in the matter of seconds, taking off quickly into the crowd around them. Madeline screeched, her eyes rounded to the size of tennis balls, as she yelled out the Shih Pu's name.

"Piddle! Piddle, wait!"

Sugar's heart was yanked quickly again as, almost as fast as Piddle had squeezed through the crowd, Maddie was fast to go after her. Dropping the handbook she'd been holding, one that held all the secrets there was behind the tourist-y wonder of Ireland, Sugar was pushing her small body into the sea of people taking their time to take in the scenery. "Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me...Maddie, wait!"

Sugar managed to find an opening in the crowd, in which she took, and began to run. Several feet in front of her, running much faster than her mother who was wearing heels, Maddie was full-blown running after the dog who Sugar couldn't even see in front of them.

"Madeline, stop! STOP!"

Pushing herself between a couple, apologizing on the way through, she watched as Madeline disappeared into another mass of people. Sugar could hear Aiden shouting after her, words she couldn't even begin to process at that moment, but Sugar had dove into yet another crowd of tourists after her daughter. However, much to her surprise, she'd practically ran right into Maddie who stood motionless on the other side of the crowd. Wrapping her arms protectively around the small girl as she caught her breath, Sugar knelt down to her height to look straight into the small girl's face.

"Madeline Grace Motta, what have I told you about running off. You can't! Not in the middle of a city where no one knows-"

"No, Momma! It's okay! Look. Piddle found a friend!"

Sugar's hands, holding tightly onto the sides of Maddie's face left it as she turned around to look towards Piddle who she had failed to notice was in their presence as well. Flustered, Sugar's eyes attempted to take in the picture and focus on what in fact she was looking at. Piddle's tail was wagging, more furiously than she'd seen in so long, and she was practically in the lap of someone who had knelt down to greet her. Looking up to the face, the first aspect she took in was the familiar blue eyes, Sugar let out a small gasp.

It was Rory Flanagan.

Standing up slowly, as Rory seemed to do as he cradled the happy Piddle in his arms. Sugar's mouth parted almost curiously, her head cocked to the side as she seemed to look from Piddle, to Rory, and back again as if trying to understand what she was taking in. It was most definitely Rory, much older and wearing a sort of suit. Had he became a teacher like he'd been trying to do for years?

"'ello, Sug."

The words seemed to have been caught in her chest as her lips curled into a smile, a nostalgic filled one at that. Looking down at Maddie, who seemed to be curiously looking for answers in Sugar's face.

"I..uh. Rory Flanagan, this is Madeline. This is Rory-"

Sugar's head motioned down to Maddie, though not quickly enough as Maddie took a step forward and held out her hand for him to shake.

"I don't know why she calls me Madeline. It's Maaaaddie. Maddie Motta."

A chuckle was heard from both Sugar and Rory, Sugar rolling her eyes at the young one as she motioned towards her.

"So, you're in Dublin now?"

"Moved back 'ere a few years ago, actually. Got a job. Lived with a girl fer awhile, but now just by meself. 'm a teacher at a school just up on tha' hill o'er there."

Sugar watched as Rory motioned towards a large school which, as he'd said, resided on the top of the hill that was easily walked to following the cobblestone path they'd been standing on.

"I'd heard ye were comin' to Ireland.."

"Just got here yesterday. We'll be here for awhile, actually."

"Momma, maybe Rory could show us Ireland?"

Standing up on her tiptoes, Maddie brought her hand to her mouth as she attempted to whisper into Sugar's ear.

"I think he likes you!"

Sugar's mouth curled into a wild grin, as Rory's did, when he obviously was able to hear Maddie's secret.

"I'd like that. As long as that's okay with Rory."

Sugar's shoulders shrugged as she watched for Rory's reaction. To think she hadn't seen him since 2015, five years prior, seemed impossible to the ear. Then again, she must've looked as different to him as he did to her. However, apart of him appeared just as familiar to her as he always had. He was still her Rory.

"Of course, Nala. Of course."

Sugar watched as Rory set Piddle lightly back onto the ground, handing Maddie the pink leash that she'd let get away from her the first time. Wrapping it cautiously around her wrist, Maddie reached out for Sugar's hand which she was quick, and happy to take.

"Ye ready to go forward? 't's a bit o' a far way to go."

"I'm sure we can handle it. Nothing wrong with making a little change in our path, right Maddie?"

Sugar grinned at Maddie's laughter, watching as she nodded her head in agreement. Catching Rory's gaze as he watched her grin, she began to follow him in the direction he was walking. Who knew she'd run into Rory but, as she learned a long time ago, she wasn't second guessing anything. She was going to take life as it came and, as far as she was concerned, that was okay to do. For now, this was her life. From small town Rich girl to international superstar, with more than a few bumps and challenges on the way.

And you know what? Sugar was more than okay with it ending just like that.

[lesugar]

If I Ever Leave This World Alive - Flogging Molly

"So when in doubt just call my name Just before you go insane If I ever leave this world Hey I may never leave this world But if I ever leave this world alive”

[lesugar]

Text || Sugarman

Puck: Well you're a Puckerman by association biff, don't doubt it for a second.

Puck: Uh... yes?

Puck: Lets be honest, who wouldn't bend that rule?

Sugar: I hope you mean that.

Sugar:...ugh. I knew it.

Sugar: I love you, Puck. The plane is coming for us right now.

Sugar: I picture the biggest bear hug of my life right now from you.

Sugar: Maybe even a kiss, if you're lucky.

Sugar: See you on the other side, biff.

Sugar:

[lesugar]

Trust me, you're not getting rid of us that easily! Expect a postcard or five, my dear! Nothing less than the best for Aunt Harmony..and one of my very best friends.

And with that...

[lesugar]

"Watching days and moving on. You wake up every Monday, then suddenly it’s Sunday, and the week is gone. So till the morning breaks, go and make your mistakes. Don’t be surprised at the sunrise. Life is for the living, the forgiven and for leaving town alive."

Bethany J. Galeotti 

[lesugar]

Leaving Town Alive by Bethany Joy Lenz

[lesugar]

Text || Mottason

Finn: Well that goes without saying, of course I will!

Finn: Wise words, Miss Motta. ;) Oh I'm sure it'll be a whole new experience for you.

Finn: You and I both know that's not entirely true, but thank you Sugar. :) I am, and I can't disagree on that one. Well you'd better make it back from your trip for it then.

Finn: Of course I'd be in a tux. Why wouldn't I?

Sugar: You and me both know that's completely true! A Motta never lies! It's in a history book somewhere those exact words, mister!

Sugar: JUST CHECKING. Just making sure you weren't taking it casual or not.

Sugar: People do that you know.

Sugar: Casual weddings.

Sugar: Ha.

Sugar: Ha.

[lesugar]

Text || Sugurt

Kurt: Awful example.

Kurt: Well, I can always link you to items in my line that I think would look good on you and that you should wear during appearances. ;) And, you know, I won't say no to a little namedropping from Miss Sugar Motta herself.

Sugar: Done, done, done. Please do! I wouldn't mind that in the slightest. :)

[lesugar]

Text || Mottaling

Jeff: I think I give you just the right amount of credit, and barely that.

Jeff: Thank you though, I appreciate it.

Jeff: Yeah, yeah everything's okay. Work's just kicking things up a notch or twelve right now. As soon as things cool down you better believe that you, me and that little lady have a Skype date. Just uh, just give it a bit, then I'll be there. You'll be able to tell me all about your travels then.

Sugar: Jeff Sterling, I tell you this too much, but you're going to be a great husband.

Sugar: I can't wait for that day, but I so understand. Things will be a bit busy on this end for a bit as well. Maybe when Maddie officially starts begging me, we can make that wish come true. I can't wait. Something tells me I'll have a lot to tell you. :)

[lesugar]

Text || Sugarman

Puck: Hell yes, and you would enjoy that with them.

Puck: Damn straight. That will be us. I did not like it ... Okay maybe a little. Uhh yeah and then once they were together they couldn't keep their hands off each other all over your house. Piddle complained about being locked in a closet once.

Sugar: I'd be squeezed in the middle of them. A Puckerman sandwich. :)

Sugar: Wait, what?! They better not!

Sugar: I remember I gave them strict orders not to have sex in my house..something tells me that they probably bent that rule when they were puppy-sitting.

[lesugar]

Sugar

Happy birthday biff, may you record all your adventures here, talk to me in this journal. Once you return I will read every page and imagine living those adventures with you. Remember we still have more adventures to go through together so return to me safely. I love you.

Puck

[lesugar]

Text || Sugar

Dave: Hope you had a good birthday weekend. You deserve it.

Sugar: You, sir, are fantastic. :) I had a blast, thank you.

[lesugar]

Text || Sugar Motta

Santana: You better have had an awesome birthday.

Santana: I'll never forget your birthday party my senior year. And...I'm gonna miss you when you finally go.

Sugar: I did! What I remember of it anyways. :) One last hoorah before I leave.

Sugar: The Halloween Birthday Party of Santana Lopez. ;) How could I ever forget? I'll never forget any of the parties, the laughs, or just when we were all together. We really were a crazy little family.

Sugar: I'm going to miss you too, San. So so very much.

[lesugar]

The lights of the red carpet were intoxicating.

For someone who wasn't use to the fame and spotlight by now, it surely would've been intimidating. Thankfully, just like Sam, Sugar was more than a professional at making public events. Wearing a small pink dress, reminding her more or less of something that came straight from her high school closet, Sugar figured Sam would like the small hint of nostalgia that came with seeing her for the final time that evening. 

She hadn't been too sure that she was going to make it to the red carpet at all before the following evening. Time really had become of the essense that last month and a half, jumping from one busy antic to another. However, when Sam had asked her to come for the last time, Sugar found it more than impossible to say no. It would've meant they were saying goodbye under a broken promise and, for Sugar, that simply would not due. Not even for a second. Even if it was a short evening, Sugar catching a late flight back to Chicago to get back to Madeline and their moving spectacular, it would be worth it to see Sam and the work he'd made for himself one last time.

And boy, was it. Sugar was no stranger to the media and just how famous she'd become, but not only her friends as well. There usually wasn't a talk show session that she didn't mention Santana or Sam, even Artie or Quinn if things went into the talk of movies. Some knew that they'd been friends, but she'd let that stick to being a mystery a long time ago. That was a bond they held in, more or less secrecy, and one that no one could truly take away. It was always there, even when they didn't get to see each other as frequently as wanted. Sam was hot topic those days, especially with the movie, and Sugar couldn't have been more proud. Never had she expected, when she sat on her kitchen counter and listened to a bruised Sam Evans open up to her about his gay relationship with Mike, that the two would be standing where they were in that moment in time. Never in a million and one years would she had expected but, nevertheless, she was proud of him. How could she not be? He became the star she always knew he was. 

"Sugar, Sugar, Sugar, Sugar over here!"

Sugar held the small side purse to her side, smiling widely as she walked. Turning to let the cameras click a few appearance pictures of her, more or less as she pretended to be into the moment as she really looked towards Sam's direction as he was practically swarmed. Grinning wildly, it seemed Sam had locked eyes with her just in the exact moment that she'd found his. Her heart leapt as she held out a hand, holding her palm up in the air to give the smallest hint of a wave. Motioning her head to the craziness around them, a sweet smile speaking for her among the crowd to say how amazing everything was. However, it wasn't until finally that the swarm of people had lessened, the cameras dying off just enough, that Sugar and Sam could now stand face-to-face. Sugar couldn't help but cackle in excitement as Sam screamed out her name, without much hesitation any longer the two were quick to embrace. As she wrapped her arms tightly around his body at first, she found her arms slowly loosening as she rested her lips into the base of Sam's neck and closed her eyes.

The last time.

Her nose flaring lightly to fight at her emotions, Sugar found it a hard battle and the tears blurring her vision before she got the chance to fight them. Pulling her head away enough to lean close to her ear, Sugar closed her eyes as she spoke.

"I'm so proud of you, Sam Evans. You're everything and more I knew you'd be. I love you. So so very much."

A lighter squeeze of her arms and she pulled away even more, enough to catch sight of his blonde features. Her lips found his cheek as she kissed into it lightly, nodding her head in agreeance to her words as she did so.

"You...you are a rockstar."

She had to let him go, to walk, she knew that much. With that, Sugar let her arms fall away from his body and she took a step away to give him his space for a moment as she recollected herself. What was that saying Finn had always been babbling on about? The show must go on all over the place? That was what they had to do. They had to move on. 

Just as he did, Sugar brought her arm over to rest on his lower back as they walked together. Holding his shirt in the small of her palm, Sugar smiled at their onlookers as they seeked the end of the carpet.

Together. As it should've been.

The Last and Best Ultimate Moment | Sugam

The red carpet was bumping and everyone that was here was here. It was that thrilling excitement like when he won his first Country Award, but this was so much bigger. This took two years and finally it was out. The creation that him and Tim McGraw made. It was great to collab with another artist and not just songs. Working with an idol of his was like a dream. All the flashes were on him and Tim as they stood side by side. Of course this night wouldn’t be as perfect without his friends. Sam had given all his friends free passes and were able to get in before everyone else. A row to sit in and get on the carpet to take pictures with Sam and Tim as well. 

One of his friends and best of all Sugar Motta was in sight and all Sam could do was smile. He was proud of her. He was proud of his friends but knowing that Sugar was off to travel the world with her show and make the world her own made Sam happy for her. Sure it was bitter sweet since he wouldn’t be able to see the girl, though they haven’t hung out since the last time he was in Chicago or they were both in New York together. But he loved Sugar. She was the crazy, fun, and absolutely sweetest girl he has become friends with. She was there for him from the start of McKinley and when he was with Mike. All the heart felt moments and motivation conversations were made together. Even drunken antics with her. Their love for the same music as well. 

All was getting to Sam and before he knew it the girl was right in front of him. Calling her name with such an joy in his voice, Sam smirked at her. Waiting for Sugar to wrap her arms around him and have that great hug like always. It wasn’t just your normal Sugar and Sam bro hug but it was their last bro hug. As Ultimate buddies, best friends, The Beauty and the Beat. Sugar was the Nicki Minaj to Sam’s Justin Bieber. There was no stopping for them as they were going to take the world by surprise with their talents, and that’s what he loved about them. They kept positive to each other. For others, and always helping the one’s they loved. It was just life having to take over on both his and her end that they wouldn’t be able to see each other. That didn’t mean they couldn’t skype, call, text, email. Sam was going to always keep Sugar updated and surely vise versa. 

As they were making the end of carpet, walking together Sam wrapped his one arm around her waist to begin to pull her into that huge hug.