lilysofthevalleyy

[lilysofthevalleyy]

no update, just reminding you that i’m always proud of you for the hard work you put in. even if i don’t know what it is. coolest person ive ever met

i love you my guardian angel, mean lots 2 me

life is gr8 for once (;

[lilysofthevalleyy]

gonna try out therapy soon, hoping next week

yea yea ik about time. i’ve been trying to work on myself without one for a month but maybe it’ll be better with some actual help

proud of u sm that ur focused on ur own life n trying so hard to get better n doing new things. appreciate u doing that n still having the time to check here. i always check on urs. always proud of u n i should’ve been more outspoken of that (insert gayyyy sound effect here)

stg we gon prove ur therapist that we can make it work. not sure how we will come to that but it’ll fs happen. bc ur still here n we still care ab each other.

neva eva gon find someone like u. neva!

anyways, ur my motivation now n ur my guardian angel always

[lilysofthevalleyy]

ok i’m chill now

[lilysofthevalleyy]

on mommies this life go hard

[lilysofthevalleyy]

think imgoing to break dow againim like having images of yourhd face in my head now idk why

[lilysofthevalleyy]

godqmnitj

[lilysofthevalleyy]

she’s due tmr morning but god this has been getting me so emotional the past couple of days lmao. all this baby talk and it makes me think about you know what n i fucking broke down the other day tookmaoo. i haven’t cried like that in so long. i lovebeing with lani she’s so adorable idk it amkes me so emotional im realg gonna have a baby sister that’s 7 fucking siblings. i know i should stay positive imhsopy i am really but ive never felt h this emotional so many things in my head right now

i wish you were here but i know it’s better this way n im glad im not overheleing youwitbbunch of texts

[lilysofthevalleyy]

her name is lily

[lilysofthevalleyy]

happy fathers day to me

[lilysofthevalleyy]

fuck them ice raids fuck trump fucking arguing on twitter with his bitch ass boyfriend fuck these wars fuck them fuck everything that’s going on

ik you’d be by my side n support me anyway you could if you were here n that thought alone is enough. not so worried for my family but god knows i will lose my mind if something fucking happens

i loveyou and miss you alot. thinking about you everday. trying to keep my head up hope you are too.

[lilysofthevalleyy]

going to visit my mom in the hospital

shes dealing with minor stuff other than the baby so she’s staying for another couple of weeks. she’s a strong and beautiful woman i’m not so worried.

won’t reveal the name until the end of the month which is when she’s due muahaha loser!

youve also been visiting my dreams more often. not thinking so mcuh on it, but dreams will always have some kind of hidden meaning to me. last night you seemed sad. there’s not kcuh i can do but you’re always in my heart and praying tomorrow is better for us both. even when you’re not here you always find a way to make me look forward to my future

mini update.

[lilysofthevalleyy]

happy pride month!! thank you taking the courage to come out to me n being comfortable with me about it

loved the new vid, love the supportive comments n the vid description

am doing great, hope tomorrow is better for you.

proud of u

[lilysofthevalleyy]

soul said “janeeeeee!! i’m hungryyy where r uuu!! i miss uuuuuuuu!”

[lilysofthevalleyy]

today was a lot better. i’ll try not to get into much detail i think it may upset you. dwelling on my behavior towards the end of our friendship and trying to work on that w other relationships. just realization after realization on what ive become but i am doing better just working on that. being more self aware on the way i react to things or process in my head makes a lot of things easier and more sense. like my trust issues and so on

loved ow vid btw good song choice as always (:

i’ve been thinking more ab this update thing i said the other day. we’ve tried so many different ways on this no context thing lmao we stupid bro LMAO. so i think its okay and not going behind ur therapists back if you post purely updates, but that’s ultimately ur decision if u want to wherever u can, i shouldn’t ask just if and when you want. im already asking for a lot and hoping im not overstepping any boundaries this way.

i hope you’re still wanting to become a teacher. i hope you’re getting more comfortable with yourself body and mind each day

i love you dude

[lilysofthevalleyy]

AND WE BACK

THIS REAL TEARZ

i’m doing better gonna make another post later

[lilysofthevalleyy]

i dreamt about youtoday.

haven’t dreamt about youin a while andi couldn’t stop cryinglmao. it’s starting tohit and all i could think about was that one day you called me saying the same thing. i was so close to callingyou but it would ruin things. imiss you. i’m ivebeen dokgn good ive been trying to work on myself and its only beentwoweeksbutim doing good im doing good i am. i cried just cried a lot but mainly happy tears. and missing you tears. and loving you tears.

i knowyou come here tolook at mymessgaes cuz i asked you too andimhaopy you do but its cheating when i actually ask you for something and jmsorry about that. im sorry for being shitty towatdstou and makjgn tou anxious. i’ve always thought in my head i thought i was doing the rightthing. iknow takkijg about it it won’t make either of us feel betwe but this is myonly safe space and you make it feel safehere. i love you jane i think about you everyday and your wellbeing. for the both of us <3

anyways i’m finna bounce back from this and keep it moving. just looking forward to tomorrow

[lilysofthevalleyy]

rave lit