literalprincess

[literalprincess]

Jesus Christ I have JUST realized that women use FTM to mean full time mom on the app I use to find recipes. I was like WHY ARE SO MANY TRANS PEOPLE MAKING MEDIOCRE PASTA DISHES!?

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

My mom is waxing poetic about cheese tonight

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

in World War 1 around 8 million horses died but in World War 2 it was under a million which can only mean horses started to evolve bullet resistance

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

In Japanese, they don’t say “moon,” they say “tsuki,” which literally translates to “moon,” and I think that’s how language works.

[literalprincess]

on the one hand, extremely funny to get told “get help” by a fortune cookie, on the other, i can’t believe betterhelp has breached influencers and podcasters and started getting fortune cookies to shill for them

[literalprincess]

"you look tired" well the torment is relentless and the horrors never cease

[literalprincess]

[literalprincess]

I recently had surgery, and at the time I came home, I had both my cat and one of my grandma's cats staying with me.

- Within hours of surgery, I wake up from a nap to my cat gently sniffing at my incisions with great alarm.

- I was not allowed to shower the first day after surgery, and the cats, seeing that The Large Cat is not observing its cleaning ritual, decided I must be gravely disabled and compensated by licking all the exposed skin on my arms, face, and legs.

- I currently have to sleep with a pillow over my abdomen because my cat insists on climbing on top of me and covering my incisions with her body while I sleep (which is very sweet but not exactly comfortable without the pillow). She also lays across me facing my bedroom door, presumably on guard for attackers who may try to harm me while I'm sleeping and injured.

That's love. 🐈‍⬛🐈❤️

[literalprincess]

I hate when people say ohhhh your pets only love you because you feed them. as if that wasn't the first form of love any of us felt. get real.

[literalprincess]

From the words of Thomas Sangster:

"Thomas is venturing into the Maze, messing things up, going against the rules...

...And Newt's just like..

✨️YOU GO GIRL✨️"

[literalprincess]

thomas: hey wanna play 20 questions

newt: sure, what's your favourite animal?

thomas: green. do you like boys