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god

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both the mage rebellion and the templars had the foresight to not send their most important people to the conclave incase someone might try something, but the chantry did not only put their most important person there, but also everyone that was an immediately obvious choice as her successor so really there problems are kinda their own fault.

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(jerk hawke voice) samson is not that hard to escape poverty 🙄 if only you stopped drinking lyrium and used it to purchase a rune of fortune so your enemies drop more coin... Yeah they are fucking acumulative. 5% on your chest, 2% on your helmet, 3% in your boots and gloves, 3,75% , you'll get 13,75% more benefits with every dead. And 10% more with every buddy you have. Anyone can can get these in the black emporium under kirkwall. What do you mean "what am i talking about". The place with the talking skeleton. With Thaddeus Gigantus Crumbum the Third. Yeah, the golem. Where you can also change your face in a mirror, and everyone will act like you were always like that? You know the place. Honestly is like people here aren't even trying.

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Been thinking a lot about Game Of Thrones season 8 and how that’s basically what DA4 felt like. They basically pulled another Daenerys Targaryen with Solas, which had the domino affect of needing to rip out the narrative and thematic foundations upon which the series was built, watering down and rearranging its contents in the interest of character assassination and forcing an ending that makes no sense and accomplishes nothing.

All the previously smart people are now idiots (e.g, Varric and Tyrion). The previously grey characters are now either centrists or suddenly grew a 21st Century sense of morality overnight because we can’t have anyone feeling ambivalent about the fan favorites. Any and all nuance or depth has been scrubbed by writers who don’t appear to have even a passing familiarity with said character, their history, or the themes of their journey (e.g, John Snow, Jamie, The Hound; Morrigan, The Inquisitor, Isabela, Dorian, and pretty much every returning character)

The big existential threat that has been looming for generations is put to an end by someone who just kinda had a special knife and didn’t make sense being there anyway.

Any and all exploration of the logistics, implication, and societal impact of what’s going on (which was a huge part of both GOT and DA) is absent. Basic facts about the word are presented wrong because the writers couldn’t be bothered to do their jobs properly and just kinda wanted to get it over with. Characters and subplots resolve (if at all) with the most frustrating, lazy, and nonsensical conclusions.

I could go on. But damn I’m so tired.

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The adventures of Inquisitor Maddox : Part 9

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Recruitment and hanging out with companions! This was a bit longer so I changed the format a bit, i hope is easy to read :) i also didn't got the breeches pun until. like. this year. (in my defense english is not my first language)

blowing kisses to everyone who is reading this and liking it and leaving me nice tags/replies, you dont know the joy it brings me <3

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Anders: I apologize, Justice. I didn't mean to suggest you would become a demon. Justice: I should certainly hope not. Anders: I just wondered what relation there is between spirits and demons. Demons are a worry to any mage. Justice: I do not know what makes demons as they are. Such evil angers me, but I do not understand it. Anders: Well, I hope you never come to understand. Justice: I as well, mage. More than you could possibly know.

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literally nothing will ever be funnier than this oneshot kill from merrill

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? varric we're at the fucking beach

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like its just so funny to me "alistair was always white" OK? """""TANNED""""" OR NOT THEY STILL TURNED THAT MAN INTO A STARK PALE GINGER WITH BLUE EYES LIKE 😭

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vigil's keep gang 💀💅✨

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Romanced Taash has an energy I can only describe as like…

Rook: …Taash would you still love me if I were a worm? 🥺

Taash: What? Why? Has anyone told you they’re gonna do that to you? ‘Cause that’s real fucked up. That’s Not Cool. I’ll beat them up for you if you want to so they can’t do that. Just tell me where they are. Oh shit. I gotta ask Emmrich if he can turn me into a worm so I can be a worm with you in case it happens anyway so you won’t be alone. He’ll probably need my blood or something and it’ll be real creepy and corpsy but that’s fine that’s a small price to pay. Wait. What do you mean would I still love you. Of course I'd still love you. With my whole also-worm heart if it came to it. Why would you even ask that.

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homeless man calling another homeless man broke

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This is a comparatively minor gripe amidst all the other problems with DATV, but one that really sticks with me:

Partner. Not wife, partner, even though Sera's one of the only two romances that have an onscreen wedding in Trespasser. This is in spite of her journal entry here:

...and her dialogue here:

...that show she's very clearly invested in the fact that they are married and that she has/is a wife. She *is* the one who popped the question, after all.

I know that it's more and more common for people, queer people in particular, to use "partner" in place of a traditionally gendered word (and Maker knows that Veilguard just loves inserting modern vernacular in a fantasy setting 🙄), but here it almost seems like they're deliberately trying to avoid calling Sera the Inquisitor's wife? Which is insane if true, considering the (at times overbearingly) progressive tone of Veilguard's writing at large. It feels even more egregious considering that:

They've been married for 10 fucking years at this point.

Sera is the only Dragon Age companion whose romance is explictly and always sapphic by design.

Like, she's a woman who loves women and asks her woman lover to marry her. Sera being a lesbian is an important part of her character and obviously central to her relationships, romantic and otherwise. In a world where homosexuality seems to be tolerated/accepted in many cases but is far from being considered "typical" or "normal," the fact that Sera gets to be a wife and have a wife at the same time seems like kind of a big fucking deal to her, y'know? Sure, maybe things change over a decade or it's just not that deep, but this little detail really grates on me for some reason.

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If Veilguard did use save ports (not even the Keep, straight up save ports) they would have the opportunity to pull the funniest move in Dragon Age history and make it so that there's a single chest in Solas' room in the lighthouse and all it has in it is all of the high-grade gear he stole from you at the end of Inquisition

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Y'know I love the Mourn Watch's corpse puppet king as much as the next person but where are my horror fics. "The necromancers are puppeting the king's corpse so that they can rule the country in all but name and everyone knows they're doing it but no one can do anything about it and they just keep throwing assassins at it because they don't know what else to do but it keeps getting up again" is such a delicious horror concept.

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ik i'm super lelianapilled or whatever but we are never learning what the fuck was going on with tug (and sketch) are we