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We looked inside some of the posts by lmaobutwhy and here's what we found interesting.
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theres some post somewhere abt ppl gravitating to certain ships bc htey want that kind of dynamic for themselves which is Something
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i miss t a lot. i dont know i talked 2 a abt it a little bit and they said its probably on me if i wanna get in contact again but i dont think i necessarily have the right? i dont know. t was always kinder than they acted. i dont want to say i want to talk and then them to feel like they have to contact me even tho im the mistake maker????? i dont even know how to quantify what i feel or how to be friends with them again
i wish i hadn’t ruined anything????? i wish i could UnRuijn it. i dont know if thats a thing. i just really miss them a lot and i wish i was a less shitty friend????? i wanna be better at being loved
#sometimes i think ive otten better at it but then i had a dream that a was my datefriend and well#it was uhhhhhh Definitely a nightmare#thanks prof to for teaching me how to decipher dreams so i can understand the INTENSE ANXIETY ive been feeling re:them maybe liking me#ninety nine percent sure they dont tho so its prolly fine#but every so often i rmbr that its impossible to ever really know whats going on in someones head and i get freaked again#i dont think they do tho. its fine#anyways i want a gf
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been missin t like crazy recently. i can’t figure out if things with s would have been better or worse if we still were friends.
#in my desperate attempts not to fuck things up with s the same way i did with t i managed to make the exact opposite mistakes#siri how do i stop withdrawing when i find myself in any situation that could be potentially labelled romantic#also how do i un-ruin one of the best friendships ive ever had that saved my life countless times
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i dont think im a bad????? person necessarily but i might be one who’s incapable of being romantically loved in the way i want
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another day another realization that im fundamentally unloveable and eprsonally ruined both my romantic rships out of a mix of fear and my own flawed personality
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going over my mal and seeing all the stuff tagged with “t rec” makes me feel a thing hhahahaahahhahaha rip rip rip
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hera trying 2 assert herself n then instead being struck down by her creator n then ever after thinkign “i can’t do it i’m not good enough” forever i just. god i love hera i just i really related to that i just i m kiiiiind of a wreck rn
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i wanna scream abt this thing where ppl can read it actually but t follows me on all my accts and i don’t think i could do that to her wwwwwwwhoops
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[redacted]: i am interested in someone
me, a fool: is it me. it couldn’t be me. what if it’s me tho. it’s not tho. it’s not me but it could be. how do i know. they flirt w/me a lot. but it’s not me. but how do i know. it could be. well it’s probably not but. how do i know for sure. it could be. what if it’s not th--
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google search history how to be a normal person who doesn't feel suicidal when someone shows deep real affection towards me
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hhhhhhaguh i just, i can’t deal w/someone liking me, so much, i’m kinda freaked,
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i can’t be anyone’s one good thing i don’t know what to do i should never have said anything, i’m going to lose t over thsi and i don’t want to and even worse i’m going to hurt her very very badly adn she doesn’t deserve that
i love her a lot but not in the way she needs and i don’t know what to do, i don’t know how to help her
god i’m really no good at this kind of thing i fucked up so badly
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i did something stupid and i’m gonna lose t over it probably lmao bc i’m a fucking idiot i wish i could rewind and tell past me not to send that message g o d wHY DID I DO THAT LMAOOOOOO
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