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rah rah rasputin something something sour cream

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story about a man who only ever dated women bodybuilders and is now dating a chubby guy: this was different from being with a woman. women, with their sharp edges and hard bodies, tongues battling for dominance. Josh was all soft curves and smooth skin,

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"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back

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somatic symptoms of anxiety are so fucked. what do you mean I got so scared my body decided that it needed to add nausea and headache and dizzy to the situation. how is it helping

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Reblog to give a trans person a fresh and perfectly ripe mango wait huh

It's the wikipedia image??? How big could it be

What

Huh???

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hey um. so sorry to tell you this, but op of that post plays toys kinda weird. yeah you should just block them, that's not how normal people play with toys

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starts talking about my emotional state with 2 degrees of abstraction instead of 7 and the sniper across the street who i pay to keep me in line fires a warning shot thru my little hoop earring

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hey do you guys know about the Astronautilia btw

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being queer and seeing historical queer love is like a punch to the gut in a good way every time

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Had an abortion and the planned parenthood staff brought out a sombrero and a fried ice cream w a sparkler in it and sang a song about how I shouldn’t feel bad because the baby was ugly

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people needdddd to wear headphones in public because while on an otherwise very lovely walk in the park today i saw a guy sitting under a tree watching a porn parody of the star wars prequels

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"I'm just a swirl" -ice cream cone who uses TikTok

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if you find a part of a human body (not your own) you shouldn’t keep it in your house for the next 50 years. yeahhhhh. that jawbone is not for youuuuuuuu.

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okay i have to show everyone my favorite tiktok.

you don’t understand. i could recite this from memory.