loz-nerd-4ever

[loz-nerd-4ever]

Perfectly timed wedding photo

[loz-nerd-4ever]

Passing on skills #EthicalMemes

[loz-nerd-4ever]

Democrats: alright we finally did it, Trumps been impeached. Time for a trial in the-

Republicans: lol yeah about that trial. It’s not gonna be fair or anything, we’ve already made up our minds and there’s gonna be like, 0 witnesses

Democrats: oh? Ok then. If that’s the case then I guess we’ll just hold on to these *pockets articles of impeachment*

Republicans:

[loz-nerd-4ever]

[loz-nerd-4ever]

in elementary school there was an accelerated reader ice cream party at the end of the year if you read X amount of books and took a quiz on them. I always had, like, the most amount of points in the school because I was a nerd with a library director for a dad so I just did nothing but read because that was basically all i was allowed to do at home

i loved going ‘cause it made me feel like i was smart and cool even though i was lactose intolerant and would shit my brains out like an hour afterwards. 

[loz-nerd-4ever]

new genre concept: soft apocalypse

the world as we know it has ended and mother nature starts taking back what’s hers. there are no zombies or cannibals or murderous bandits. the most valued members of the community are those who know how to garden and farm, sew and weave, treat wounds, work wood or build with bricks, cook from scratch. 

people bond together to begin rebuilding instead of killing each other. everyone teaches each other whatever they do know and works together to figure out the stuff none of them know. books become incredibly valued resources because they’re often the only way to learn critical information. if someone is elderly, disabled, or otherwise unable to work at the same level as most of the community, they’re taken care of by the others, not told any sort of “survival of the fittest” bs.

as the generations ware on, communities begin expanding into small cities. some of the settlements even find ways to repurpose solar or wind power on a small scale and have electricity in some of their buildings. storytellers wander the countryside telling tales of the old world in return for some hot stew or a place to rest for the night, and the mythos of the new world start to incorporate elements of the past. the only thing that remains constant is that humans survive, and they do it by working together.

[loz-nerd-4ever]

Are you guys ever dumbfounded by the impossibility of life with animals? I just was. This exact thought ran through my head:

“I live in a house with four carnivores of varying sizes, and all of them are sitting here next to me because they want my pita chips.”

[loz-nerd-4ever]

I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldn’t see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like “uh...hi?” And she said “I made you, do you know that?” And I nodded and she was like “I hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please don’t break my heart”. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Mean™️????

[loz-nerd-4ever]

Wholesome Cat Posts That Will Hopefully Make Your Day.

[loz-nerd-4ever]

[loz-nerd-4ever]

[loz-nerd-4ever]

reasons that i was going 9 mph over the speed limit today: the lumberjack in the big red chevy truck behind me on this double-lined road was in a hurry and also was using a slightly more powerful bluetooth radio to play his music, but he was using the same frequency that i use, and he was just playing Party In The Usa on repeat, so every time he caught up to me my music started fading out and “i pUT MY HANDS UP THEY’RE PLAYIN MY SONG” started blaring from my speakers and i was justly running for my fucking life

[loz-nerd-4ever]

why are hillbilly characters always Gruff Overprotective Dad with Three Hot Daughters and never Gruff Overprotective Mom with Three Hot Sons or at the very least Hot Hillbilly Single Dad with Three Overprotective Gruff Daughters

[loz-nerd-4ever]

25 and it got me excited

[loz-nerd-4ever]

holy shit

[loz-nerd-4ever]

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

Austria: 01-713-3374

Barbados: 429-9999

Belgium: 106

Botswana: 391-1270

Brazil: 21-233-9191

China: 852-2382-0000

(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

Estonia: 6-558-088

Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

Greece: 1018

Guatemala: 502-234-1239

Holland: 0900-0767

Honduras: 504-237-3623

Hungary: 06-80-820-111

Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90

Israel: 09-8892333

Italy: 06-705-4444

Japan: 3-5286-9090

Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292

Malaysia: 03-756-8144

(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

Mexico: 525-510-2550

Netherlands: 0900-0767

New Zealand: 4-473-9739

New Guinea: 675-326-0011

Nicaragua: 505-268-6171

Norway: 47-815-33-300

Philippines: 02-896-9191

Poland: 52-70-000

Portugal: 239-72-10-10

Russia: 8-20-222-82-10

Spain: 91-459-00-50

South Africa: 0861-322-322

South Korea: 2-715-8600

Sweden: 031-711-2400

Switzerland: 143

Taiwan: 0800-788-995

Thailand: 02-249-9977

Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800

Ukraine: 0487-327715

(Source)

[loz-nerd-4ever]

“you’re going to have that tattoo for the rest of your life”

woah

really

are you serious

wow i

i had no idea thank you so much bless your soul