ludiclov

[ludiclov]

I know it seems like I just dropped the Reid x reader idea and walked away ((which I basically did...ahem)But I'm really organizing everything and trying to motivate myself to write it from start to finish, because I want it to have some coherence~

Also... I started watching Suspect Behavior and I'm in love with the team, and now I'm crying because it's only one season and there's a cliffhanger;A;

And now I want Reader to be part of the team because it would be fun to see her interact with Beth and Sam -3-

[ludiclov]

can i just say how much i dislike prison reid...

i feel like it kind of stripped him of who he was. He’s the nerdy, less intimidating, awkward, smart one. He knew he wasn’t an alpha male and he used it to his advantage, like when an unsub wouldn’t talk to hotch or morgan. but then prison reid (and kinda reid after that) became more of like alpha male and more aggressive and it’s a lot different than his original character. people say ‘character development’ but i don’t know i don’t think it’s much of a positive development. He kind of lost the things that made him unique and different than the team.

idk that’s just my opinion

[ludiclov]

to be honest, i fucking hate when people use the scene after spencer talks w cat in “date night” for “hot” edits/thirst traps because clearly he was having a panic attack

like oh yes, he’s clearly distressed after confronting someone who tormented him, he rips off his tie because he can’t breathe, and then lashes out (don’t even get me started on how the later seasons gloss over spencer’s anger issues after prison), wowza so attractive :/

[ludiclov]

the real tragedy of spencer reid: a character analysis

the real tragedy of spencer reid isn’t any of the individual traumas that he suffered on the job, it’s that he became jason gideon.

think about it; the show begins with gideon returning to the bau after he’d been on leave due to his ptsd. ptsd caused by a mistake he made resulting in the death of 6 agents in a bombing.

throughout season 1, we see that spencer idolizes gideon. the way in which he idolizes him, however, is complicated. on one hand, spencer sees gideon the same way he sees rossi—pure hero worship. on the other hand, he sees gideon as a more than a mentor, as a father figure. this is less overt than people make it out to be in canon, but it’s true nonetheless.

in the first season, we see gideon mentor reid, with the goal of shaping him into the future of the bau, the best profiler they’d ever had. we also see the similarities between reid and gideon, though subtly, at this point. it’s established that gideon and reid understand each other (perhaps in part as a result of both of them being on the spectrum), in a way that the other members of the team, do not.

in season 2, however, we see gideon start to grapple with the implications and consequences of reid’s job at the bau. this is most clear when reid is kidnapped. at this point in reid’s career, gideon was supposed to protect reid; so naturally, he blames himself for his kidnapping. in “revelations”, when the camera cuts from reid seizing to gideon panicking in the bathroom, he is desperately trying to justify his actions to himself. he blames himself for what happened to reid, and it’s killing him. reid survives, but hardly unscathed, and gideon distances himself, likely, as a result of his own unaddressed guilt. people in fandom criticize gideon for this, but it is realistic. gideon is flawed, that’s what makes him compelling.

the most telling scene, however, is in the episode “jones”. reid finally confesses to gideon that he’s struggling. gideon responds with an ambiguous monologue about knowing the time to quit. when reid declares he’ll never miss another plane again, the look gideon gives him is not one of pride, it’s one of despair. it’s his realization that reid is too far gone, he has decieed to follow in gideons footsteps in the way of giving everything to the job, regardless of what it takes from him.

sarah’s murder was the reason gideon ultimately decided to leave the bau, however, his guilt over spencer’s torture and subsequent addiction undeniably played a role.

the show goes on, gideon leaves and ultimately dies, but both events eventually blend into the background—just another one of reid’s endless traumas. it is not until season 11, especially following morgan’s departure, is when we really start to see a palpable, negative change in reid.

until this point, reid’s character development seems mostly positive. he’s more confident and sure of himself both in the field and as a profiler, and as a person. but with the introduction of diana’s alzheimer’s, we start to see reid become overall sadder, more anxious, and more reserved. gone is his need to prove himself, but we see the beginnings of the toll that the bau has taken, one he is beginning to struggle to justify.

notably, this is especially clear pre prison season 12. emily and jj particularly seem acutely aware of the fact that reid is running himself into the ground at home, while desperately trying to keep everything together at work. then, once reid goes to prison, he never truly recovers.

while the show abandons any meaningful follow up about reid’s ptsd, it’s undeniable that after prison, reid is never the same. unlike some viewers interpretations of this version of reid as being more attractive and confident (more likely stemming from seeing reid as more “masculine”after gaining some weight and keep his facial hair), the signs really point to reid after prison being utterly depressed.

he has anger issues, which clearly distress him, and his heart to heart moments with the team are laced with an underlying desperation, exhaustion, and sadness. in short: reid is drained. the job has taken everything from him in a way he no longer knows how to get back.

the final episode, the show comes full circle, highlighting the parallels between reid and gideon. reid makes a bad call that results in the death of six agents, just as gideon had 15 years prior. if it weren’t obvious enough, reid visits gideons grave in his tbi induced dream sequence. in “jones”, gideon was terrified and guilt ridden over the prospect of spencer turning into him, but it is exactly what happened.

just as gideon had, reid gave everything to the job, and the job took everything from him. reid ended up a traumatized, depressed, workaholic with no real relationships—barring only his mother—outside of his job. like gideon, like rossi, even, reid was never satisfied, never felt like he had done enough, and all it got him was a lifetime of trauma and crushing solitude. by the end, the bau was virtually unrecognizable to what it had been at the beginning of his career. reid could never leave, despite the pain, the trauma, and the loneliness, his identity as a person and an agent were inextricable. by becoming jason gideon, reid lived up to what had once been his greatest hope, and gideons greatest fear.

[ludiclov]

One flaw I'm glad they gave Spencer, and also the thing I see him criticized for is his emotional immaturity. But I'm glad he is, because it just makes so much sense.

I'm speaking from experience here, as an adult who raised herself as a child. But when you raise yourself, you have no one to show you how to be.

Spencer's dad left him a pivotal time in his childhood and his mother was schizophrenic. It was him against the world. There was no one to teach him how deal with his emotions in a healthy way. So as an adult, we see him lash out when he holds his emotions in, and we see him being petty because he doesn't know how else to deal with those feelings.

And when you combine that with the horrific bullying (also speaking from experience), you see him making assumptions about the people he LOVES because the only experience he's ever had with people who were well liked in school was a negative.

Like when he assumes that Morgan was a jock because he's muscular, or when he assumes that JJ was a mean girl because she was blonde, popular, and from a small town.

We know he dealt with the football goal incident entirely by himself, so it makes sense that, to him, everyone would be split into 3 categories: the football team, harper hillman/alexa lisben, and the bullied kid (him).

[ludiclov]

Ok I just watched the episode of JJ's confession to Reid and all the subsequent drama, and I came to the conclusion.

Or the writers genuinely have something against the character and love to make him suffer by taking everything away little by little.

Or Matthew has fun knowing how much adoration his character has and likes to keep his fans in a permanent state of shock by using him as a punching bag...

Whatever it is, is devastating to know that for Reid, despite having said chapters ago that he had at least 3/4 ideal futures, he tells Diana that he can't see a future without JJ, and his mother asks him to let her go, because he deserves to seek his own happiness, because JJ already has her, and she's not going to leave it for Reid... (Sobs)

[ludiclov]

jj: i have two beautiful sons and am married to the love of my life. everything is going right for me and i couldn't be happier.

unsub: i bet u have a secret

jj: im so glad someone finally asked, so actually I've always been in love with-

[ludiclov]

Well, I wasn't expecting so much attention with my previous post~ hahahaha °^°u

But now that I see that my idea catches their attention I think I'll put it into practice. So give me some time to organize my thoughts and advance a bit of the plot.

But above all to learn how to tag and make links on tumblr xD

Ah! Thank you very much for your interest in my random idea~ I hope to return quickly with it already up and running^^

[ludiclov]

Ok then, how about a story about the BAU having a case involving working alongside snipers as consulting agents, what leads to Reid and this beautiful, funny, sweet girl ending up becoming friends and staying in touch, without the rest of the team knowing?

And, soon after, that relationship evolves into something more, but this girl ends up being part of the team, and they're both good enough at staying formal with each other, no one else notices it

Or so they think, because Blake, being the incredible observer that she is, knows it, and it amuses her to see them pretend that they are not attracted to each other and she finds it the sweetest thing in the world?

And what if the girl discovers "something" about that relationship, but her life is put at risk on a mission and ends up being kidnapped and Reid finds out about that "something" and it causes everything to become chaotic and he is desperate to save her?

And no one else knows why, until Blake asks him to tell them and Reid gives up and tells him that they are together and about the "something", which makes everyone go crazy to save her?

Is anyone interested in a story like this? Because I would like to do it, but I don't know...

Aaaand....We can talk about how little Blake is used as a character in the stories, because, well, Blake is one of the characters Who GENUINELY KNOWS what's happening to Reid?

The thing is, girls, she was the first one to stop Reid and find out about Maeve! How could she not know!? When he sees her son in Reid!?

[ludiclov]

I just started watching criminal minds again, I came here and I found such interesting writings, my heart is heavy for Reid ;A;

[ludiclov]

||CLOVES & THORNS||

sometimes, being the nail that sticks out serves to get someone's attention.

Ran x Female Reader(kinda...)

Summary: What would be his last day of life becomes the beginning of a friendship with the Haitani brothers. What she didn't know was that for Ran, loving her meant putting his hands on her neck, and a crown of nails and thorns on her head

Content: Bullying, suicide attempts, trauma, physical abuse

Yes, well, this is my first attempt at writing a Tokyo Revengers series, I hope you like it. Comments and reblogs are welcome~!

"A protruding nail is hammered in"

Being half Japanese meant to be bullied twice as much at school. A blow, a slap, water on the shoes and knives meddled in the clothes locker.

"Why the fuck can you have dyed hair!?"

It was natural, but saying it only fueled the abuse. The same with the eyes, which had tried to be hurt more than once, which explained the use of glasses despite not needing them years ago.

"Shit, you make me mad just looking at you"

"The teachers are coming~!"

The harassed was becoming less obvious. A note with rude words, balls of paper dipped in saliva or some other substance, rubber bands being thrown, hair pulled.

"Back there!"

Their glances flew to her direction

"I'm going to ask you to leave if continues to interrupt my class"

A barely audible apology. A lump in the throat as she do so, as if one chose to be bullied as hell.

And so, the recess begins, the day almost ends. One more in the long list of days to come.

"Catch her~!"

Hands, many hands pulling in all directions, something in the mouth, something in the eyes, darkness, noise, screams, laughter.

Finally both hands tied, just like the feet. Mouth filled with what looked like a dirty rag with something sticky on it, eyes closed behind something tied tightly, footsteps, laughter and mocking laughter, the sensation of something slipping through the hair, being lifted into the air.

And then

nothing.

She could feel the lungs filling with fluid, the body sinking.

Is this water, or is she just hallucinating from sensory deprivation?

Instinctively twists limbs, can feel lungs burning, eyes stinging, mouth trying to hold air

The rag slips from the eyes.

Everything is blue

The bright sun above the head, the darkness behind her, the pain in the body. Pull hard

One

two

Three

She shudders with fear, with cold, with loneliness. Everything feels heavy, wants to close the eyes and sleep...

.

.

.

"I think you seriously killed her"

Hears the laughter, immediately turns around and vomits no matter what.

Air, she needs air

"See? She's not dead"

She gasps hard, trying to hear better.

"Come on, get up"

A strong blow to the back, a gasp, and the arms do not support her anymore

"It wasn't even a big deal, stop exaggerating"

"Let's go, the teachers will ask questions if no one is in the room"

People move away and the noise dies down, she lies there for a moment before gently pulling up.

Everything hurts.

She can't anymore.

The tears come out.

Can not be more...

_____________

"So Valhalla~"

"It will be interesting, don't you think?" Ran gently lays back on the floor "to see the great Mickey in action, and those Touman idiots fight twice as many of them"

Rin just makes a soft sound of affirmation.

"There's also the matter with Baji"

Oh... right.

BAM

A crash, followed by gasps and quick steps. Both brothers look carefully at the entrance to the roof below them. A small, slender figure turns down the stairs and approaches the edge with determination.

One leg, then the other, both hands clinging to the safety bar, which obviously doesn't do its job at all.

The occasional muffled sobs, water dripping from the hem of the skirt, and a strange viscous pink mixture dripping from the girl's hair, make it an interesting affair for both brothers

At Ran's signal, both gently descend without making a sound, approaching. They can hear meaningless murmurs coming from her lips, her hands white from the force of her grip.

Her hair sticks to her face, and she spits up in disgust and sobs harder.

"Why do I have to put up with this!?"

A gasp, mixed with sobs and a vain attempt not to make a sound. Ran looks at her curiously.

"WHY!?" "Why I... why..."

Her hands turn red, pressing the railing even harder, more broken babbling that does not reach the ears of the brothers.

"Are you going to jump or not?"

"If you want to make it worth your while, you should throw yourself when those idiots are coming out of the building"

She clings tighter as she turns around terrified, shivering, from cold or fear Ran can't really tell, but her face is full of panic as she tries to understand why there are two boys there next to her, as calm as if they were discussing the menu of the day

"You could even land on top of them, I'm sure that would have some karma on it, don't you think Rin?"

He laughs softly, nodding.

"It would be a good ending" he says, leaning against the wall "I'm sure I wouldn't let any of those who did that to you sleep. Not even the teachers"

"WHO ARE YOU? WHY ARE YOU HERE? LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Both brothers look at her, the younger one with boredom, while the older one looks at her with something indescribable in her eyes...

They look at each other, there is pain and fear on one side, interest and understanding on the other. Ran approaches, stretches out his hand, offering it as a lifeline.

"Since you don't seem to want to put on a viscera show, why don't you come with us? We have a hot shower at home."

Rin makes a mocking sound, but he nods as he disappears over the other side of the wall.

"What do you want of me?" She whispers

"I don't see you very willing to continue classes, but you're not very proactive about ruining the afternoon for those sons of bitches who did all that to you, by the way, what the hell did they put in your hair!?"

As she holds on with one hand, the other examines her hair, almost as if it weren't hers, as if she had never seen it, holding it up to her nose and sniffing.

"I think...I think it's honey and glue with...something"

Ran's expression turns stale. Moving closer to her, he stares back at her as he leans into the void, the air unsteadying her.

The boy shrugs, takes a few long steps and grabs her wrist and waist with speed, taking her to the roof in the blink of an eye.

"I don't feel like playing the knight in shining armor waiting to convince you" he says as he grabs her wrist, making her let out a pained gasp "so get your ass off or I'll push you myself to give those idiots the show of the century"