luvin2dmen

[luvin2dmen]

Greener on the other side

He was stupid, so stupid. I gave him everything, my time, my energy, my peace; and it bit me in the ass. I thought I was fixing him so he could be with me, but reality doesn’t work that way. I was fixing him for HER. I’m angry truly utterly in enraged.

Then he had the audacity to ask to be friends. 3 years, 3 FUCKING YEARS OF MY LIFE. Wasted… on what? It was supposed to be us against the world. Instead all I got was you, retreating after I asked you for a fraction of the things I gave you. All I wanted was help…

But all I heard was “Do you want to break up?”

Seriously after everything? All I wanted was you! To be my support like I was your support. I wanted to be someone who could stand next to you to be worthy of you, but I was never going to be. It was never my name it was “You’re his girlfriend.” Or “it’s your name and my name.” It was never just me. Isolation. Constantly.

I was never my own person with you. No one came to me when I needed it most. I forgot who I was without you��� and it made me hate myself. But when I finally realized it and asked you didn’t want to take that step with me. You gave up. I’m angry but I know that rage stems from hurt. You hurt me and I don’t know if I can forgive you for it.

[luvin2dmen]

Brotherly Love and Fountains

AtsumuXReaderXOsamu

12:00 

Sitting outside by the fountain in my university’s courtyard, I placed my headphones over my ears. Putting my study list on shuffle, I tried to focus on my homework. But of course there was no use. I was too distracted by the scene on the other side of the fountain. Miya Atsumu was standing in front of a beautiful girl. She stood out, that's for sure, maybe she was a foreigner. She had natural blonde hair and green eyes and was the most recent pretty girl hanging off Atsumu’s arm. It wouldn't bother me that much if I wasn't head over heels in love with the dumbass. 

We did meet until our 3rd year in highschool but it felt like a lifetime of friendship. Friendship, I hate that word. At least when it applies to him, I got along with Osamu just as well, if not more. I wanted nothing more than to confess but everytime the opportunity arose something got in the way. In this case it was her. I don't even remember her name, not like it's important, considering she's now running away crying.

I removed the headphones as Atsumu walked up to me and sat down next to me. “Hey sorry about that, what were you saying?” I shook my head. “It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.”

“Well if you're not gonna say anything, I will.” He turned to face me. “My brother’s in love with you but is too afraid to say anything.” I nearly dropped all my books in the fountain as I stood up so fast. “Osamu?!”

[luvin2dmen]

A Morning with Akaashi

AkaashiKeijiXReader

“Good morning beautiful,” groaning. I turn away from the harsh rays peeking through the window and into akaashi’s chest. His laugh rumbling through his chest makes the hairs on my arms raise as I open one of my eyes to see what was so amusing. His gaze is directly on me and I can't help staring into the azure pools that never failed to capture my heart. “I love you Keiji… but I’m still sleepy.” “Alright then sleep for a little longer I’ll go make breakfast.” He began to pull away and I grabbed him by the waist. “No, I need you here.” I said with a pout on my face. “I know but you're going to be hangry once you're fully awake and I don’t wanna risk my life on the drive to work today.” “Please, you love my road rage.” Smirking, I sat up fully. “I love you no matter what, but if you're up now you can help me.” My smile dropped and he smiled. “You planned that, didnt you! I can’t believe you tricked me into waking up.”

[luvin2dmen]

Loving You Will Always Hurt

(AtsumuXReader)

Loving you is like swimming in the ocean. You can always come up for air, but only for a split second before the next wave crashes over you. Your love is like a breath of fresh air before you're gone again and I’m surrounded by the cold loneliness that occupies your absence.

But what did I expect from you? You have dreams and aspirations, a passion that can be nurtured without me. I know leaving you would hurt you, but it would only be for a moment in the universes’ eyes. You mean more to the universe than I ever would. You are bigger than me you always have been, that's why I was drawn to you. I will always love you and I may be selfish for making this decision without you but I know you’d choose me over yourself and I can’t let you do that. 

So this is goodbye. Maybe in another life you can be mine and I can be yours once again but until then I’ll always be watching. Every game that you play I’ll be on the sidelines, whether it's behind a tv screen or my phone screen at work when I’m supposed to have that report done, I’ll always support you. I wish you godspeed and glory.

Love, (Y/N)

And with that I set the pen down next to the apartment key and grabbed my last suitcase. Atsumu would be home from his away game later tonight but I knew if I didn't leave now I would be pulled back into the ocean. Taking one last look around the apartment I closed the door to Atsumu and our future, leaving it behind me.