lxser-lxndmine

[lxser-lxndmine]

jiraiblr i love you... my bpd episode is ended and we've switched alters so i may not be very active for a while idk how long... esp cuz i plan on converting another blog of mine to shedblr lite kinda like this but not jirai... i will always be a landmine and be with u guys but im trying to recover when not sabotaging myself (LLLLLLL) so yk... not going great obvi but hey...

ill be back eventually im sure but dont miss me too much ok? 💔

[lxser-lxndmine]

OMPF

[lxser-lxndmine]

*spends all of my time alone* perfect! but why am i crazy

[lxser-lxndmine]

wehhh cries i love you mutuals!!! ive been spending so much more time on this account than my other one ... i have way way more followers over there but i hardly get any attention i get like 3 notes a day but ive been getting so much attention on this account it feels so nice... and you all understand what its like to go thru this stuff so it feels so much more personal...! thank you!!

[lxser-lxndmine]

jersey maid coord from foreign ago ... i remember it was like 90 out and i nearly died

[lxser-lxndmine]

my jirai kandi ~

[lxser-lxndmine]

i like genuinely thought ur user was laser landmine at first instead of loser

LOL?😭 yeah girl i shoot lasers ill kill you. call me landmine the way i [punchline]

[lxser-lxndmine]

sigh... one of those notes games for fun <3

1 - i drink water more consistently

10 - lock in for at least 1000 words on my latest works <3

50 - work on eating minimum 2 meals a day

100 - actually lock in for the entire fic and finish it

150 - fix my sleep schedule entirely (without using any kind of drvg)

200 - try sewing a cosplay

250 - try getting actual real therapy

500 - clean my depression room

[lxser-lxndmine]

[lxser-lxndmine]

at least i all-over thoroughly showered tho... been a while ... im actually not super bad with hygiene like i barely ever brush my teeth (once a month if im lucky) and i only shower on days that i work but hey it could be worse ig

[lxser-lxndmine]

i hope this whole counting calories thing is worth it. i hope i get skinny enough to wear the clothes i want and not feel disgusting when i lay down or bend over or sit or anything

my metabolism is fucked up is the thing i havent lost or gained weight in years so idek if itll work...

[lxser-lxndmine]

୨♡୧

[lxser-lxndmine]

i think not everyone wants to be helped. and that doesnt make them bad or attention seeking. some people just want to be heard without being fixed. sometimes saying “im not okay” isnt an invitation to be saved. its just the truth. i think its okay to sit in that. to not be ready. to not want advice. to not want to change. not everyone is trying to get better. some of us are just trying to make it to the next day. and that should be enough without someone trying to turn it into a project.

[lxser-lxndmine]

self-care phrases to boost your confidence

this shit ain't nothin to me man

I'll fucking kill you

.

[lxser-lxndmine]

quiet bpd culture is wanting to scream and throw things and have big loud emotional moments like everyone else does but i’m too repressed to do anything but cry, and get called dramatic when i even do that.

-💫🎶

.

[lxser-lxndmine]

"Leave first before they leave me" mentality because in the end, my inner child is just scared that someone will leave me all over again.

[lxser-lxndmine]