macbeka

[macbeka]

R u gay4pay??

God wouldn’t that be a good idea. I’m gay for free like an idiot. 

[macbeka]

i need a $10,000 grant to go cluuuuubbbingggg

[macbeka]

[staggering to my feet and wiping a single perfect drip of blood from my mouth] i have to get back on my bullshit. no matter the cost

[macbeka]

[macbeka]

[macbeka]

god complex? i actually find it quite simple: im better than them

[macbeka]

come on gimme things to sort. i'm so fucking good at sorting come on lemme sort

[macbeka]

Story time:

When I was in college I was the only one in the dorm with a car which made me VERY popular, but more importantly because I was so fucking down bad for my next door neighbor, I volunteered to drive her to church [literal actual baptist church my jewish ass had balls of fucking steel to walk into that bitch every week drooling after a hot femme lordt]

This went normal and fine for about three weeks until one time her roommate had a dude over and she was like "can I stay in your room tonight so I actually get some sleep before church 🥺?"

So I let her stay in my bed and well. Folks. She didn't sleep. But we DID play "how many orgasms does it take to make you pass out?" And it turns out the answer was 15 sometime around 3am the next morning. We obvi wake up RUSHINGGGGGGG to church the next morning, and when we arrive looking frazzled, the pastor looks her up and down and asks how she's doing and is she having a tough time with finals? And she just goes "no, I just didn't get a lot of sleep last night, we were studying." And the pastor goes "oh yeah, what are you studying for?"

And without missing a beat my dyke ass says "Bible Study."

If looks could kill, I think she would have ended me on the spot, but four hours later she was calling me god in the backseat of my car while I ate her out sooooooooo pretty sure the moral to this story is that pre-marital lesbian sex is fine as long as you can emotionally scar an old man in the process.

[macbeka]

holding his hand while I’m up in his pussy because. I get nervous

[macbeka]

this is the funniest god damn thing ive ever seen

[macbeka]

Dragonfly fossil, 250-300 million years ago with 2 ft. wingspan.

[macbeka]

Guess who's back from the grave~ and with way too much hualian fanart <3

[macbeka]

Do you wanna play mermaids? Yay. Okay so my tail is light blue and I have ice powers. And I live in the Arctic sea and watch British sailors die horrible deaths while trying to find the Northwest Passage.

[macbeka]

state of you // 花城

qifrey cover redraw! because i realized what's better than drawing blorbo once is drawing blorbo four times

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

[macbeka]

[macbeka]

violence is never the answer unless you're freaking it faggot style

[macbeka]

getting both wet AND hard because i don't let my physical form limit my self expression